I had heard here and elsewhere of the idea of starting a fresh (ideally clearance-purchased) Advent calendar two or three days after Christmas (depending on whether it’s the kind with 24 doors to open or 25, and depending on whether you want to open the last door the day BEFORE or the day OF), so that it could be a new countdown to the presidential inauguration. While I didn’t see any clearanced Advent calendars THIS year, I did have one I’d purchased LAST year for $3 and then never used. It had bath salts and bath…spheres (not bombs, really, but a little round ball to put into the tub), which I don’t use, but it also had hand lotions and hand scrubs, so it seemed worth the $3-down-from-$30. Why was I telling you this story? OH yes, because I used that as my Inauguration Advent Calendar, and it was a nice idea, and I’ve set aside the bath salts and so forth for a giveaway later because I am sure someone else would enjoy those.

I don’t feel as desperate these days for Something To Encourage Me To Get Out of Bed, thank goodness. We’re less than a week into the new presidency and I wake up every morning, feel the familiar dread of the last four+ years, and then remember that Tr*mp is just some guy now, and he doesn’t have any power over us anymore, and that the new president is already more than three days into an actual plan to combat Covid-19 so maybe someday I can go back to work and the kids can go back to school and people can stop dying of this.

Still. That was 50ish days of opening up a little giftie each morning before my shower. A person could get into the habit. Which is why it was VERY HAPPY to discover/remember that last year I ALSO bought the Target 12 Days of Christmas calendar on clearance. And so I opened Door 1 on the day after Inauguration Day, and I am doing The Twelve Days of Inauguration. I realize that I should have opened Door 1 ON Inauguration Day, as one would open Door 1 on Christmas Day—but I didn’t discover/remember I had the calendar until the day after, and also I feel like Inauguration Day, like Christmas Day, already had enough stuff going on and didn’t need a little bonus giftie; and also, when I woke up on Inauguration Day things weren’t celebratory yet: the day after Inauguration Day was the First Morning Someone Else Woke Up in the White House. So I am just barely able to get over the feeling that I should have opened Door 1 at, say, lunchtime, and proceed from there. NOT EVERYTHING HAS TO BE EXACTLY RIGHT IN EVERY WAY, SWISTLE.

If the response to yesterday’s post is an indication, it seems we are Here For a mix of OH GOD IS THIS THE END OF OUR COUNTRY AS WE KNOW IT, complaining about the “””cleaning””” methods of our housemates, and discussing recent purchases—which is basically the current contents of my brain, so good, let’s continue as long as we’re here.

I am gradually learning which things work better to order for pick-up and which work better to order for shipping. This morning I received two of Target’s LARGEST shipping boxes, and they weighed so little I thought they might be empty. It turned out each contained ONE of the two windshield wipers I’d ordered. To be fair, the wipers were not available for pick-up, which is why I had them shipped. And I could see why it would be a good idea to package the somewhat fragile and spindly windshield wipers separately from, say, heavy crashy things such as jars of peanut butter and cans of beans. But surely the pair could have traveled companionably together? Well, it feels like the wrong moment in history to make little constructive criticisms of shipping facilities.

I would like to make a spousal complaint about Mr. Thistle, aka Little Miss He Absolutely Did Not Do Whatever it Is I’m Mad at Someone for Doing, Even If He Absolutely Did. Here is an example. I keep a roll of masking tape in a kitchen drawer; I use it to label containers of leftovers. It is WELL-KNOWN that that particular roll MUST STAY IN THAT DRAWER OR MOTHER WILL LOSE HER MIND. I will buy ANYONE WHO ASKS a roll of masking tape OF THEIR VERY OWN! TWO rolls! But leave MY masking tape in that drawer, because when I am drearily cleaning up the kitchen after drearily feeding everyone yet another meal, I am in NO MOOD to go looking for that tape. Anyway, the other day it was missing, and I made a loud and extended remark about it. Paul said he personally hadn’t seen or used that roll of masking tape in months. MONTHS! But that he would be happy to let me use HIS roll of masking tape, which he keeps in his desk drawer, which is why he would NEVER take mine. He went to fetch it, and then there was a little pause, and then he said that actually he had TWO rolls in his drawer, so I could HAVE one. He said this magnanimously, even though it was IMMEDIATELY clear to BOTH of us that he HAD taken my masking tape, and then had accidentally returned it to his desk drawer—and, since I use masking tape nearly every day, it DEFINITELY had not been “””MONTHS”””.

It’s eight days until Inauguration Day. Today Congress is requesting the Vice President and Cabinet to please declare the President unfit for office and have the Vice President take over. No one really expects that to work, but it would be nice to have them on record as declining that offer. Tomorrow begins the Impeachment process. IT’S EIGHT DAYS UNTIL INAUGURATION DAY. CAN WE HURRY THIS UP A BIT. PERHAPS GET STARTED WITH IMPEACHMENT WHILE WE’RE WAITING FOR THE VP TO IGNORE THE REQUEST. PERHAPS CONSIDER WORKING OVER THE WEEKEND. ETC. There are pretty intense concerns that the inauguration will not be safe, and that state capitals will also not be safe.

Meanwhile Covid-19 is cropping up closer and closer. At first I was hearing about it happening to more distant connections: Paul’s aunt’s husband’s brother, for example, or a childhood friend’s mother-in-law. Now my cousin has it (not the racist one I finally had to unfriend—this cousin is one of my dearest friends), and her husband has it, and a different dearest friend’s daughter has it, and Elizabeth’s friend’s sister has it.

I have been getting hives again, and although I will need to get this officially checked out when it’s safe to do so, it’s pretty clear they’re stress related. Around Election Day: HIVES HIVES HIVES EVERY DAY HIVES. After the Election was called: NO HIVES. Christmas stress: HIVES AND HIVES! After Christmas but before attempted coup: NO HIVES. Attempted coup: HIVES. I’m taking a daily Zyrtec, and also take benadryl before bed when I have any active hives.

Also, awhile back my OB/GYN recommended a B-complex supplement for handling peri-menopausal symptoms (she says it’s also good for adolescent symptoms, and said at one point she put herself and her teenaged daughters all on it for everyone’s safety), and I ran out of it and needed to buy more, and I chose this particular formula SOLELY because it has the word stress in the name. (I take half a tablet, because of only half believing it will help, and because those are Very High Doses of B vitamins, and they’re not particularly cheap. I double-checked with the Target pharmacist the first time I bought some, and he said it wasn’t dangerous to take so much, it just makes for very expensive pee.)

(image from Target.com)

I also bought this Sleepytime Extra tea, which I keep forgetting to try in the evening before bed:

(image from Target.com)

When I used to work in a pharmacy, a co-worker and I had a stretch of finding work Very Very Stressful (corporate was dramatically cutting staff hours, so that most of our shifts were now frantically busy and impossible, and of course customers reacted by being frustrated and upset with us all day long, which we couldn’t really argue with because we WERE failing to meet reasonable expectations, but on the other hand it’s pretty stressful to have people mad at you all day long for something that’s not your personal fault, and we were crying pretty much every day and making hysterical plans to quit), and we asked our pharmacist boss if the valerian root supplements we stocked actually worked or if it was just woo-woo herbal lies, and he said oh, no, valerian root was a real thing that actually did have an effect, and so my co-worker and I each went out into the store, each bought a bottle, and each took a capsule on the spot, and it became a running joke, and where was I going with this story that no longer seems worth it? Oh, yes: that the valerian in this tea might actually work, though probably it would make more sense to buy a bottle of valerian root capsules and swallow one or two with a cup of better-tasting tea (even the capsules taste/smell TERRIBLE, so I don’t have high hopes for the flavor of the tea).

Well. Didn’t THIS year feel like one that might never arrive.

We had a bit of a flop of a New Year’s Eve, for various reasons, but no big deal. The year-in-review thing the news channel was doing was so depressing we had to mute it, but that’s okay. The nearly-deserted Times Square thing was obviously a giant change, which was GOOD! but odd. (And how many non-present “hosts” are we going to stack in the title as the decades go by?) None of us remembered to put fortune cookies on the list until about ten minutes before midnight, which was FAR TOO LATE TO THINK OF IT, especially when MOTHER ASKED SEVERAL TIMES OVER THE PREVIOUS COUPLE OF WEEKS IF ANYONE COULD THINK OF ANYTHING IMPORTANT WE NEEDED FOR NEW YEAR’S. I WAY overpurchased snacks, and I ALWAYS overpurchase snacks, and this was MORE THAN THAT, so that I felt stressed at all the things I was not eating. Also, somehow it accidentally turned into “Mother runs back and forth bringing snacks while everyone else relaxes”? We will be sure to avoid that situation next year, mark my words. MARK. MY. WORDS.

In the meantime, I think January 20th is a GREAT day to aim for a do-over. We can have all the leftover pizza rolls and egg rolls and mozzarella sticks and chocolate-covered pretzels and fun ice creams, and the champagne I wasn’t in the mood for, and so forth! And I can buy the stupid fortune cookies! And we don’t have to stay up until midnight, we can just go to bed at the usual time, because actually the fresh start is at noon! GLORIOUS!

I wish to discuss resolutions, if any of us have managed to make any at this interesting-times point in history. It’s okay if not. MORE than okay if not. Please don’t feel you should, if you’d rather not. Just abdicate the whole idea, with everyone’s full blessing. THIS IS NOT THE YEAR, unless you want it to be the year.

As usual, there is low interest around here in “I WILL CHANGE MY BODY TO BE SMALLER / THINNER / MORE SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE” resolutions. As usual, feel free to HAVE those resolutions, we cannot stop you, nor would we ever even consider attempting it, as many of us DO HAVE those goals, so DO go RIGHT AHEAD, and may it bring you EVERY THEORETICALLY-POSSIBLE ASSOCIATED JOY! But I feel like we have had our ears FULLY FILLED with that sort of resolution from EVERY POSSIBLE SIDE (media! marketing! friends! family! ALL OF CULTURE AND SOCIETY!), and that it is such a lucky thing to have places to discuss the OTHER kinds of resolutions instead, and I would like this to be an Other Place.

My resolution this year is to buy more Fun Clothes. My parents gave me this Christmas llama t-shirt in navy (I am an XL Tall in Old Navy and I take a 2XL in this), and I wore it on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day and felt super cute and glad to be wearing it:

(image from Amazon.com)

And while this was not the original seed of this year’s resolution, it fortified and strengthened that resolution. Long, LONG have I envied Elizabeth her children’s-department t-shirts with pictures of sloths and llamas and rainbows and so forth! But there are companies that sell similar shirts for adults (I have this rainbow one in women’s 2XL baby blue)! And I have access to those companies via computer and credit card! So I am resolving to buy SEVERAL new fun shirts this year. Contenders so far:

(image from Amazon.com)

A second llama Christmas shirt. (So cute how the links default to the men’s sizes, even if I select women’s before making the link! Super cute!)

(image from Amazon.com)

Hello Kitty Christmas shirt. I only need maybe two Christmas t-shirts total, but this is what’s in my cart right now. (Again, wow, the link goes the MEN’S shirt! Yay! Love it!)

(image from Amazon.com)

Library card shirt, for if the pandemic is ever over and I can go back to my library job.

(image from Amazon.com)

Robin Hood fox shirt. FIRST/EARLY CRUSH FOR SO MANY OF US.

(image from teepublic.com)

Raccoon Royalty shirt. I love MANY of these shirts, but the fact that they give a “Tee Tip!” that “many customers prefer” to “order a size or two up!”—but it turns out “customers” “prefer” this only if they are customers ordering the Women’s cut, which is ALREADY available only up to 3XL, verses men’s cut which is available up to 5XL—meaning that apparently ACTUALLY they are offering women’s shirts up to XL and men’s up to 5XL, makes my heart turn icy and then, shortly afterward, catch on fire. Do please mention if you know of t-shirt companies that don’t think it makes perfect sense to offer shirts in sizes only for grown-men and teen-girls. I don’t WANT to buy from Amazon, but their 2XL women’s shirts fit my tall-torsoed non-skinny frame without making me feel as if I hit my maximum culturally allowable size at age 12, and I do value that. [Edited to add: I think the ABSOLUTELY MOST HELPFUL is when people can compare to other brands: like, if you say “I’m a S petite in Old Navy / Gap / Target tops, and I buy a M in This T-Shirt Company I’m Recommending and it’s a little long but not TOO long,” that is SO HELPFUL, even though I am not a S or a M or a petite.]

I mailed a USPS priority package to Paul’s sister on December 11th, and it was supposed to arrive on December 15th, which was this past Tuesday, three days ago. I thought just now to check to make sure it had arrived—and it has not, and it is marked as “arriving late.” The last time it was checked in was on the 15th, the same day it was supposed to have arrived at its final destination, when it instead arrived AT OUR LOCAL DISTRIBUTION CENTER IN THE NEXT CITY TWENTY MINUTES AWAY. Its status is “in transit to the next facility,” even though there isn’t the usual progress line about it leaving the local distribution center, so I think it’s more likely it’s still sitting there 20 minutes from my house. This is a little stressful/frustrating. I am trying not to think about it. It will not help to worry about it: there is nothing I personally can do about that package at this point. I’m extra glad I mailed it two weeks before Christmas, because it’s been traveling a week so far and MAY NOT EVEN HAVE LEFT THE STATE

I heard on the radio this morning that I am definitely not alone in shipping woes, and in fact am luckier than most because I only have a couple of packages in limbo. But I wish those didn’t include THIS PARTICULAR package: if it were something for Paul or one of the kids or my brother or my parents, I would just print out a picture of the item and wrap that, and they’d have the actual item soon enough. (I’m probably going to have to do that with some used D&D magazines I ordered from eBay for Henry, which shipped on the 11th and have been stuck at a processing facility since the 13th.) But Paul’s sister is the one where I feel like what we send is MOST of her Christmas, and so it’s important to me that it be there in time for Christmas. Well. There is nothing I can do about the package at this point except go back in time and mail it EVEN EARLIER. Or send it UPS instead, which didn’t even occur to me to do. And I wish I’d insured it.

I’m also trying not to order anything by mail right now that I don’t need sooner than Christmas, to avoid clogging the system still further.

I am feeling high with relief to have dealt with one of the biggest tasks of the holiday season: getting Paul’s sister’s Christmas package completed and mailed. It was ready a week ago, except for items from ONE delivery that still hadn’t shipped two weeks after I’d placed the order. I finally emailed the company, and they didn’t answer my email but the package shipped the next day, so. Anyway, those items arrived today, I swooped the box into the house and opened and it and put the items directly into Paul’s sister’s box and taped it up and took it to the post office, where I was prepared to come back another day if it was too crowded. It DID look crowded, but I’m glad I decided to look inside, because as I got out of my car THREE of the cars in the parking lot left, and two more people were coming out of the building as I was going in, and when I got inside I was first in line. I haven’t been inside the post office in a long time; there were big clear plastic sheets hanging from ceiling to desktop, and there were taped-off waiting areas on the floor to keep people six feet apart, and there were signs asking people to please keep themselves, other customers, and the postal workers safe. When I left there were three people in line, so my timing was exquisite.

It was about $40 to mail the package, but we are not even going to think about it. Honestly it’s a bargain, if I picture how much I would want to be paid to take that box to where Beth lives. And when I was calculating the price online before heading out, I experimented with how much would it cost if I added another pound, if I subtracted another pound—and even when I suggested taking out a pound and a half the price didn’t shift, so I think I was just in a size/weight range that was going to be about $40 whether or not I took out the package of candy. So I put IN another package of candy and felt happy.

ANYWAY IT IS DONE. IT IS MAILED. It is OFF my dining room table and off my time-sensitive to-do list and out of my hands and on its way to her, and even with increased mailing delays should have enough time to get there. I wish I could have sent it a week ago but it’s fine, it’s FINE.

IT IS TIME.

Isn’t it odd, thinking of us at this time last year, browsing calendars with no idea what 2020 was going to be like? My calendar is full from January until mid-March with normal stuff; then it is full of crossed-out things from mid-March through April (with more cross-outs later as we cancelled later and later stuff, but the real THICKET of cross-outs is the first 4-6 weeks); then it is full of contract-tracing-type information (when/where we went, and at what time).

Well! We shall hope for better for 2021. Or at least part of 2021. Or anyway it’s fun to have a new picture to look at each month!

I use my calendar to keep track of my schedule, so I need one with squares to write in, but I don’t need one of those “”””MOM”””” calendars that have no room for the picture because they’re all squares. I look for a nice balance of picture on top, squares on the bottom, so that’s my screening process for these choices. LET’S GO.

[I might continue adding to this post, but am posting it NOW because calendars were dropping from “Only 9 left!” to “Only 7 left!,” etc., AS I WAS ADDING THEM TO THE POST. Apparently this is calendar-buying week. It was making me jumpy and unwilling to wait to post.]

(image from Target.com)

Fresh from the Garden calendar (Target) (Amazon). This is so bright and colorful with so many things to look at, and I feel like Fresh Produce is a cheery theme almost no matter what the new year brings. (If it brings a massive produce shortage, then never mind.)

(image from Target.com)

Happy Hedgehogs calendar (Target) (Amazon). Similarly, I feel as if we will not be SORRY to see a hedgehog each time we glance at the calendar. (Though if 2021 brings us an invasive attack of hedgehogs—and who among us could muster the surprise at this point?—then never mind.)

(image from Target.com)

Space Cats calendar (Target) (Amazon). Last year I actually DECIDED ON this calendar (in large part because of imagining how surprised my Fundraiser Calendar Twins would be, receiving that in the mail!), and it had SOLD OUT. That experience gives this calendar a head start in the running this year.

(image from Target.com)

Take Me There calendar (Target) (Amazon). Are you someone who PINES to travel again, and will only be cruelly taunted by these photos of beautiful places you can’t go right now? Then this may not be the right calendar for you. Are you on the contrary a person who would like to think of themselves as someone who travels, but you never actually do, and so you would like to look at beautiful places and for once not feel as if you ought to actually go? Then this seems IDEAL.

(image from Target.com)

Flowers calendar (Target) (Amazon). Nice and colorful and won’t taunt you with what you can’t have (unless 2021 is the year the bees die off and there are no more flowers).

(image from Target.com)

Nature’s Bouquet calendar (Target) (Amazon). Flowers again, but more field-of than zoomed-in-example-of.

(image from Amazon.com)

Birds & Botanicals calendar (Amazon). Miss Grace drew my attention to this one and I LOVE it. I like the Parlor Wallpaper vibe. [The link broke when it sold out; it didn’t originally go to an owl calendar!]

(image from Amazon.com)

Llewellyn’s 2021 Greenwitch Botanical calendar (Amazon). HOW CHARMING IS THIS??

(image from Amazon.com)

Botanical Gardens calendar (Amazon). This is so frilly and extra and I am so here for it. Writing spaces are kind of small because of all the decoration.

(image from Amazon.com)

Illustrated Order of the Animals calendar (Amazon). I love this and I think I would LEARN from it, but I need more writing space than that.

(image from Amazon.com)

Inside Poland’s Majestic Churches calendar (Amazon). This is not a calendar I would have predicted I’d be including. But just LOOK at those churches!!

(image from Target.com)

Furry Friends calendar (Target) (Amazon). They are furry; they are friends; perhaps all could be right in the world.

(image from Target.com)

Home Sweet Home: Our Happy Place calendar (Target) (Amazon). So. Okay. For ME, this feels a bit too on-the-nose/bright-siding. But Elizabeth has a friend whose house is just FULL of Live Laugh Love, Faith Friends Family, With Coffee All Things Are Possible, In This House We…, etc., and I would think this could be just the calendar for emphasizing the cozy positive side of being housebound? Or it might be too much even for that.

(image from Amazon.com)

World of Color calendar (Amazon). Sometimes when I see something that is a mad riot of color, I think “My eyes were STARVED for color and I hadn’t realized!”

(image from Amazon.com)

The Art of Daniel Merriam calendar (Amazon). This is not quite my style, but I think this passes the test for “a page that would be interesting to look at for an entire month.”

(image from Amazon.com)

Farm portraits calendar (Amazon). I feel that the duck is the shot and the widdle bunny is the chaser—but without feeling entirely sure I understand the metaphor of shot/chaser.

(image from Target.com)

That Dood Squad calendar (Target) (Amazon). I don’t know what’s going on here, but it’s making me feel happy to look at it.

(image from Target.com)

Corgis calendar (Target) (Amazon). Edward wants a corgi very badly, based on their cute appearance; I have looked into the breed and have broken the news to him that, while undeniably VERY VERY CUTE, a corgi is Not The Right Dog For Us. Perhaps a calendar instead, for admiring their undeniable cuteness.

(image from Target.com)

Unicornucopia calendar (Target) (Amazon). I don’t know either, but I added it to my cart. This feels like pure 2021 energy to me.

(image from Target.com)

Sweet and Sassy calendar (Target) (Amazon). Elizabeth happened to be passing by, and she and I both liked the cover page. Then we saw one about how girls want to have fun, and also nice handbags, and also equal pay, and we were like “Ooooooooo pretty good?” Then we saw the one about how all you need is love…and also a million dollars and fabulous shoes, and in unison we both said sarcastically “GIRLS AMIRITE??” And then we saw the one about how what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, except bears which will kill you—and I would have to put a different calendar page over that one because THAT IS NOT A PLACE IN WHICH THE WORD “EXCEPT” MAKES SENSE. IF BEARS WILL KILL YOU, THEY ARE ALREADY EXCEPTED BY THE PHRASE “WHAT DOESN’T KILL YOU.” Then we were looking at the whole back cover and Elizabeth said, “Hm, and they’re all white.” EVERY SINGLE WOMAN IN THIS CALENDAR IS WHITE. IN THE YEAR OF OUR LORD 2021. Which may not be 100% accurate (I don’t know their genes, and the pictures are small), but. Anyway, I just wanted to make you feel mad too.

(image from Amazon.com)

The previous calendar could learn a lot from the Hot Guys with Cute Animals calendar (Amazon), which I use purely as a good example of better diversity.

(image from Amazon.com)

Posters for Change calendar (Target). I think this is such a cool idea, but January’s poster would make me sad and anxious all month, and I don’t think that’s what January needs. Also, Elizabeth, who had gotten sucked into this calendar-choosing project, thought some of the posters “looked like middle-school projects.” If I DID get this calendar, I think it would be neat to combine it with the goal to make a donation each month to a cause related to that month’s design.

(image from Target.com)

Christmas is Coming calendar (Target) (Amazon). The entire calendar is Christmas-themed. I admire and enjoy the thinking of whoever came up with this idea and then just went with it.

(image from Target.com)

It’s a Good Day To Crochet calendar (Target) (Amazon). Oh, this is so fresh and pretty.

(image from Target.com)

Landscapes calendar (Target) (Amazon). Tranquil and pretty—and it’s a little sad how comforting it is now to see wide open spaces with NO PEOPLE in them. Too many of my bad dreams this year have involved being in a crowd.

(image from Amazon.com)

The Legacy of Ruth Bader Ginsburg calendar (Amazon). *WEEP*

(image from Target.com)

Can’t Kill Me calendar (Target) (Amazon). The cover of this doesn’t appeal to me per se (I don’t have a cubicle, I am not known for killing plants), but I love the pictures: just an entire plant on a plain white background, being a plant. This is a strong candidate.

(image from Target.com)

Farm Yoga calendar (Target) (Amazon). I am briefly drawn to each funny yoga calendar (Cow Yoga, Horse Yoga, Sloth Yoga, Llama Yoga, Unicorn Yoga, etc.), but, because it’s the same kind of animal each month, the calendar doesn’t seem visually interesting enough to last a whole year. THIS one has a different animal each month, which puts it into much stronger consideration.

(image from Target.com)

Peaky Blinders calendar (Target) (Amazon). My understanding is that some of you have a bit of a thing for the gentleman on the cover.

(image from Amazon.com)

Animal Crossing calendar (Amazon). If we’d been choosing calendars back in April or May, I think this would have been the household’s choice.

(image from Amazon.com)

Star Trek Cats calendar (Amazon). Omg.

(image from Amazon.com)

Bob Ross calendar (Amazon). I bought a Bob Ross calendar one year and found it a very soothing choice.

(image from Amazon.com)

Teapot calendar (Amazon). To go with all the tea I am drinking.

(image from Amazon.com)

Mandalorian calendar (Amazon). Did I mention we’re watching this? Sure is a lot of shooting and killing and racing and crashing and swaggering and being all tough-guy, considering how many of us are only watching it for the cute baby.

(image from Amazon.com)

Pusheen calendar (Amazon). We had a Pusheen calendar one year, and it was such a satisfying calendar I almost buy it again each year.

(image from Amazon.com)

Backyard Foraging calendar (Amazon). Oh, that’s a fun concept, and also I really like the artwork. I don’t like how small the squares are.

(image from Amazon.com)

Feathered Friends calendar (Amazon). I can’t remember if I’ve actually had this calendar, or if I’ve just had it in my top three so many years in a row it FEELS like I’ve already had it.

(image from Amazon.com)

Este MacLeode calendar (Amazon). Gorgeous. A finalist last year, but sold out before I could decide.

(image from Amazon.com)

Masha D’Yans calendar (Amazon). I have had a Masha D’Yans calendar twice, which is the most I have ever had a calendar by the same artist or else I might be tempted to choose it again.

(image from Amazon.com)

Klimt Landscapes calendar (Amazon). I was strongly considering this one last year, but waited too long (“Is it…too many little dots of color?”), and then I had regrets—which makes it a stronger finalist this year.

I’d say I’m down to Space Cats, Can’t Kill Me, Este MacLeode, and Klimt Landscapes—and most strongly toward the last two, especially since Elizabeth thinks she wants Can’t Kill Me for her room.

If you use calendars: what are you choosing this year?

I am getting nervous about gift cards for delivery people. Normally I give one to the mail carrier, and in recent years I’ve started putting one out for UPS. But this year is different, OBVIOUSLY. I have been getting a LOT of things shipped. Here are my anxieties:

• Even the top amount I’m thinking of tipping a delivery person seems pretty flimsy at a time like this—almost insulting. Like, *tossing coin, making them catch it*

• Also, I just went to double-check what the rules were, and for USPS mail carriers the maximum gift they may receive is something valued at $20—and they may not receive ANY cash or gift cards in ANY amount. (Source.) Er, I have been (1) giving gift cards and (2) at times exceeding that value. And I got a nice thank-you note from the mail carrier, and she did not give the gift card back to me saying she couldn’t accept it. So I am guessing those rules are not followed/enforced, but now that I KNOW the rules I hesitate to deliberately break them. But. They strike me as…not-good rules. And maybe…I will just continue to break them, pretending I don’t know? I WOULDN’T have known, if I hadn’t deliberately looked it up! It’s just, I am QUITE SURE my mail carrier would rather have a gift card than a Thoughtful Mug or whatever. (Perhaps I could leave a giant bottle of hand sanitizer, and a package of toilet paper?)

• According to this AARP article, Fed Ex drivers are not allowed to accept anything. But…quite a few of our packages have been coming Fed Ex. (We’re not choosing Fed Ex: the company that ships the packages is choosing.) Do I leave out a card anyway, on the idea that, as with USPS carriers, Fed Ex delivery people might just…go ahead and accept anyway?

• Wait, what about Amazon delivery people? It’s different ones all the time! Maybe put $5 in an envelope on four separate expecting-a-delivery days and just hope it works out?

• That worries me about UPS, too: I am pretty sure we have one main driver who does our route (that’s the way it was at our old house)—but during the holidays, maybe it would be an extra holiday person running the packages up to the house, and THEY’D get the gift card! (I realize I could…I don’t know, call UPS and ask or something, but let’s be at peace with the idea that I am just not going to do that.)

• I have just realized to my dismay that I must have missed the Target 10% off gift cards sale. I remember seeing something about it, I remember INTENDING to act on it…and now, I don’t see anything. Well. Into each life a little rain etc.

[Edited to add: I should mention that we tried to do the good idea of setting out a big basket of snacks/waters, and the squirrels absolutely destroyed it. So that is now out of the running.]