Our Favorite Baby Name Sibsets Starting with W

35 Replies

First post of this series, with longer explanation, here.

You can choose any number of siblings, any number of boys/girls. This might be TOO broad in scope and, as we play, we might come up with better guidelines. But for now, the idea is that we are imagining a little sibling set of children (they do not have to be our own children), and all of their names are going to start with the same letter, and we will just see how things go from there. As before, you can say as much or as little as you like about your decision-making process, and you can choose multiple sibling sets (“This is what I’d choose for two girls, this is what I’d choose for three boys, this is what I’d choose for one boy and one girl…”) or just one—whatever is most fun / whatever you have the time and energy for on that particular day. I liked the idea some people had of re-naming their actual children with matching initials. (I am not going to attempt that with the more difficult letters.)

Today we work on the letter W. When we played the previous game with W, I chose Winifred and Warren, and I like those fine as a sibling set. I also liked Willemina and William, which I wouldn’t use together, but would use one or the other. And I like Wesley and Winston and Wilson; Wilson joins the Willemina/William group, and I wouldn’t put Winston and Winifred in the same sibling set. Normally I would prefer not to use names as far apart in popularity/style as William and Warren, but I might like it better if they were separated by other siblings: as I had more and more children, I became more relaxed about things like that. For example: William, Winifred, Wesley, and Warren.

Oh! This is the first letter where I have enough names to play it that I am re-naming my existing children! Okay, okay! Then it would be Wesley-called-Wes, William, Winifred, Warren, and…hm. No, I run out of boy names, because after I use William I don’t want to use Wilson, and after I use Winifred I don’t want to use Winston. But that’s okay! Close enough!

Our Favorite Baby Name Sibsets Starting with X

14 Replies

First post of this series, with longer explanation, here. I’m inspired to go fairly rapidly through some of these more difficult letters.

You can choose any number of siblings, any number of boys/girls. This might be TOO broad in scope and, as we play, we might come up with better guidelines. But for now, the idea is that we are imagining a little sibling set of children (they do not have to be our own children), and all of their names are going to start with the same letter, and we will just see how things go from there. As before, you can say as much or as little as you like about your decision-making process, and you can choose multiple sibling sets (“This is what I’d choose for two girls, this is what I’d choose for three boys, this is what I’d choose for one boy and one girl…”) or just one—whatever is most fun / whatever you have the time and energy for on that particular day. I liked the idea some people had of re-naming their actual children with matching initials. (I am not going to attempt that with the more difficult letters.)

Today we work on the letter X. When we played the previous game with X, I chose Xenia and Xavier, and I like those fine as a sibling set. I also liked Xanthe, which I think is nice as a third name in the set: Xenia, Xavier, and Xanthe: all different endings to balance out the matching beginnings. I’d also liked Xia, but I don’t like the way Xia is like Xenia with two letters removed, so I wouldn’t put it in the same sibling set as Xenia, but I like it as a substitute: Xanthe, Xavier, and Xia.

Our Favorite Baby Name Sibsets Starting with Y

21 Replies

First post of this series, with longer explanation, here.

You can choose any number of siblings, any number of boys/girls. This might be TOO broad in scope and, as we play, we might come up with better guidelines. But for now, the idea is that we are imagining a little sibling set of children (they do not have to be our own children), and all of their names are going to start with the same letter, and we will just see how things go from there. As before, you can say as much or as little as you like about your decision-making process, and you can choose multiple sibling sets (“This is what I’d choose for two girls, this is what I’d choose for three boys, this is what I’d choose for one boy and one girl…”) or just one—whatever is most fun / whatever you have the time and energy for on that particular day. I liked the idea some people had of re-naming their actual children with matching initials. (I am not going to attempt that with the more difficult letters.)

Today we work on the letter Y. When we played the previous game with Y, I chose Yvonne for a girl and Yates (in honor of Sally Yates) for a boy, and I like those fine as a sibling set: I can see it either as an advantage or as a disadvantage that the Y-sound is not pronounced the same. If I WANTED to have matching starting sounds, I would be pretty happy with Yasmin and Yates. I wanted to come up with more sibling sets, but there are so few Y names.

Baby Girl or Boy C@mero

23 Replies

Hi Swistle,

I’ve read your blog for YEARS and now find myself needing your assistance. We are due in November with our first baby and are not finding out gender. We are very set on a boy’s name (Samuel) and should have no issues with a middle name.

We are STUCK on girl’s names. Our top two favorite names are Emilia and Everly (both E names completely unintended). We think for this first girl we are leaning with Emilia. We originally were going for Amelia but changed to the Emilia spelling for the nickname option of Emi, which we love. So first question: will Emilia have to go through her life spelling her name over and over? Are we making a mistake choosing Emilia over Amelia?

Our second (and biggest) problem is middle names. We actually really love boy names on girls but want to stick with a traditional girls name for first name and possibly a boy-ish name for middle name. However, are having a truly difficult time finding one that flows well with Emilia. So far we have come up with:

Emilia Logan (current front runner)
Emilia Parker
Emilia Ryan (we know some Ryan’s, so iffy on this)
Emilia James
Emilia Evan (not sure we love the double E’s)
Emilia Riley

We’ve said these names aloud so many times that they’re all starting to sound the same and like none of them flow well. Can you and your readers give us some insight or suggestions? Should we give up the desire for a boy name?

We definitely plan for more kids, hopefully no more than 2 girls because really the only other girl name we have is Everly. We would probably do the same naming style for her if we can get Emilia to work.

Please help give this kid a name! :)

 

Yes, a girl named Emilia will have to spell her name over and over. But my name is Kristen and I have to spell it over and over, and it’s no big deal: some names just have more than one spelling, and it gets to be a habit to clarify: “My first name is Kristen: K-r-i-s-t-E-n.” It helps that the popularity of Em- names has made the Emilia spelling significantly more common in recent years: it spent decades not even in the Top 1000, but as of 2020 is the 40th most popular girl name in the United States (the spelling Amelia is #6). And if she uses the nickname Emi, that too will help guide people’s minds to the correct spelling.

I am not personally a fan of the trend of giving girls names-currently-used-more-often-for-boys as middle names, primarily because it annoys me that the trend does not go the other way: we are not hearing of a similar edgy trend of baby boys being given middle names such as Jane and Rose. (If the middle name candidates for Samuel include such names, then I withdraw my complaint.) But my own preferences are irrelevant for any babies not my own, and I think the middle name position is a terrific place for names you’d like to use as first names but have decided not to for one reason or another. I don’t see any particular flow issues with Emilia + any of the middle names you list: I think they all work well. I tripped a little bit over Emilia Parker C@mero—but the three names will hardly ever be said together, so that feels like a non-issue. One thing to watch out for: making sure you don’t accidentally use any names you may wish to use for future boys (or names that would rule out other names for you, if your preference is to avoid even similar names).

As far as I know, there is no way to find out usage information on middle names—but based solely on what people mention in their letters to this site, I can tell you that James seems to be far and away the most common of the names-currently-used-more-often-for-boys chosen as a middle name for girls. This could be a plus or a minus, depending on what you’re looking for.

If it helps, we can also look at the 2020 usage of these options as FIRST names in the U.S.:

Logan: 992 F, 9086 M
Parker: 2121 F, 3797 M
Ryan: 678 F, 5286 M
James: 63 F, 12250 M
Evan: 87 F, 3389 M
Riley: 5309 F, 1350 M

From this we can see that the name James is currently the most used-more-often-for-boys of the options, usage-wise: 12,250 new baby boys named James in 2020, and only 63 new baby girls. The name Riley, in contrast, is currently used more often for girls than for boys—and the numbers above don’t even take into account all the other spellings (another 2,677 new baby girls and 127 new baby boys named Rylee; another 1,742 new baby girls and 15 new baby boys named Ryleigh; etc.).

If Emilia Logan is your front-runner, I don’t see any reason not to go with that, or any reason to choose a different name instead.

Since this is your first child and you’re planning more, I’ll mention that I do notice that Emilia and Everly are very different styles, and also that Emi and Evvie are very similar-sounding nicknames, in case either of those situations affects which name you wish to use now. I would expect a child named Emilia to have sisters with names such as Eleanor and Sofia and Violet; I would expect a child named Everly to have sisters with names such as Emerson and Hadley and Brinley or (maybe not those exact ones, because of the repeated -ley—but names LIKE those). The two names aren’t startling together (the shared E- helps, I think: Amelia and Everly looks a little more surprising to me), and not all parents prefer for names to coordinate in style, but it’s the sort of thing I like to think about ahead of time, just to make sure I don’t make things difficult for myself later on. (We very nearly used the name Emerson for our first child, without realizing that our usual style for girls was more like Josephine and Elizabeth, names I don’t think coordinate well with Emerson, and we DO like at least some level of coordination; luckily, our first child was a boy, and by the time we had a girl we’d realized.) (Not that it would have mattered, since we had only one girl. BUT ANYWAY.)

Baby Boy T________, Brother to Jameson/James and Natalie/Tilly; Names that Lead to the Nickname Lance

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Hello!

I really didn’t think I would ever have the need to write in with another question after you helped name our daughter a few years ago but here we are. =)

I am currently pregnant with our third (and last) baby, a boy, due in mid-September and we are absolutely stuck on a name for him and can’t find any names that we both love and agree on.

Our oldest son is 4 and named Jameson Penn after both grandpas and my husband who all share the name James. We call him both Jameson and James equally. Our daughter is 2 with the full legal name of Natalie but exclusively called Tilly. From our last pregnancy, I emailed you with the dilemma of loving the name Tilly for years but both my husband and I not liking the full name Matilda for the nickname, You suggested that Tilly could be a stretch for Natalie and we fell in love with the name combo immediately. Even to this day, I still get so giddy (and so many compliments) on her name. Her middle name is Juliette named after my mother-in-law for an honor name.

And now almost three years later, we have found ourselves in a very similar bind somehow. It is rare for my husband and I to agree on a name so we both end up just putting our favorites on a list which now includes 29 names which only seems to be growing as time goes on. His front runner is Samuel which I do love but I can’t stand the nickname Sam which I know it would inevitably turn into. MY front runner is Lance. I love, love, love the name Lance. My husband also really likes it and says that it would definitely be our top choice if it wasn’t for the nickname issue AGAIN.

Our last name is a one-syllable, short, harsh-sounding German name sounding like a mixture between Trout and Trash. Lance T________. Just doesn’t have the same flow as Jameson or Natalie and seems too harsh. And, just like Matilda, we don’t like Lancelot to get the nickname. I went online to look for alternatives and there really doesn’t seem to be any for Lance except I saw one Reddit commenter say that she used Lawrence with the nickname Lance. And again I fell in love! For so many reasons, this seems to be the perfect solution! This final baby will be named after my mom as the last grandparent honor name with the middle name of Beck for Becky. So that means all three of my babies will have an honor name covering all their grandparents and dad and I am the only one left out as the mom. I’m so happy we did the honor names and don’t regret them at all but I would be lying if I said I wasn’t a little salty that, as the mother, I kind of get left out.

My first name is Courtney and before becoming a stay at home mom, I worked in the legal field which was always a joke with the name association with teasing of “Courtney goes to Court” etc. I LOVE that LAWrence and COURTney would have a very small connection (and I am in no way implying that he would be in the legal field as well or pressuring him into that) but I find it a cute name-match that probably only I would think of.

This time around though, I’m surprised at the push back I am getting from my husband and other close family members about it being too much of a stretch to use Lance for Lawrence compared to using Tilly for Natalie. I feel like it’s the same amount of stretch and unusual for both but workable. I’m hearing comments that it will be too confusing, people won’t get the association, Lawrence and Lance are two different styles while Natalie and Tilly aren’t, etc. So I’m curious what your readers and name-experts think. Is Lance too much of a weird stretch to come from Lawrence? Is it weird that we would have two kids with longer names but nicknames only used for them while our oldest doesn’t have that issue? Are there any other problems you could foresee with this name combo? I’ve never wished for a longer last name more than I do when I’m pregnant because it would solve so many of my problems with my love for short nicknamey-type names as first names. I appreciate your help and I promise to update you when the baby comes in a couple of months!

Courtney T.

 

I agree with you: I don’t think Lawrence/Lance is any more of a stretch than Natalie/Tilly, and I think it’s a clever solution to the problem. I greatly dislike the argument I’m about to make (when people make this argument to me, I INVARIABLY think “sure, theoretically this makes sense, but on the other hand those other nicknames came about naturally and this one didn’t, so”), but if this is the perfect time and place for it, then here is how it goes: “If Meg and Maggie can be nicknames for Margaret / If Betsy and Libby can be nicknames for Elizabeth / If Ned can be a nickname for Edward / If Ted can be a nickname for Theodore / If Hank can be a nickname for Henry / If Dottie can be a nickname for Dorothy / If Kit can be a nickname for Katherine / If Jimmy can be a nickname for James / If Nell can be a nickname for Eleanor / If Larry can be a nickname for Lawrence—then what’s so much stranger about Lance?” (And I’m trying to choose the more familiar ones, here! I’m not even getting into Sadie and Sally for Sarah; Polly for Mary; Daisy for Margaret!)

Furthermore, I think having a nickname that’s a different style from the given name is not only Highly Desirable but also Typical: it’s one of the APPEALS of a long formal name, that so many of them come with different-style nicknames! Maybe Margaret feels like it’s a bit much for a baby, but Daisy/Maggie are just right; maybe Charles seems a little formal for a toddler, but Charlie works beautifully; Theodore is so dignified/elegant but cute Teddy is perfect for now; Leopold is heavy but Leo is light. Etc. That’s the way nicknames WORK! No one says “Oh, but Posey is such a different STYLE from Josephine”! On the contrary: around the world we have parents saying “I’d love to use my grandparent’s name, but it’s so old-fashioned; can we think of a good nickname for it, to make it more usable?” Which is what, as it turns out, you’ve reverse-engineered in this case, if reverse-engineered is the term I want. (Do you have a Lawrence in the family tree anywhere? I think that would make this EVEN BETTER.)

I don’t think it’s weird to have two kids with near-exclusive nickname usage and one who uses both a given name and a nickname: this is the kind of thing that can feel important during the naming process, but later on no one notices/cares. It helps, too, that one kid with a nickname solution is a girl and the other is a boy. And that a lot of people won’t even know Tilly/Lance are nicknames: we know a bunch of Liams, and for most of them I don’t know which are given-name Liams and which are short for William; we know a fair number of Bradys, and for most of them I don’t know which are given-name Bradys and which are short for Braden. And perhaps Jameson will choose to go exclusively by James in the future, and people won’t even know it’s a nickname and will think THAT is his given name. I don’t think this matters, is what I’m trying to say.

I hesitate to mention this issue, because I find I don’t want to say anything against the name Lawrence, but with your surname I believe it could be misunderstood as the name Lauren. We have a family friend whose name is Liam Mason, and it is almost uncanny how often people even in our own household think someone just said Leah Mason. Lawrence Tr____ is not as blendy, but could still be heard as Lauren Str_____. But it sounds like you’d be calling him Lance almost all the time, so it would not come up the way it does with our friend Liam.

I would also like to add that I think Lance T____ works fine (similar to the famous singer Lance Bass), and that it’s not necessary for sibling names to share similar flows. But I see what you mean about preferring something longer and perhaps less consonant-rich. Still, I think if I were you I would go for the name I really wanted rather than finding a work-around. It’s just that at this point I like your work-around so much—but NORMALLY I would be saying no, just use Lance, don’t use a name you don’t want to use in order to get the name you DO want to use, when the problem you’re trying to solve (two one-syllable names in a row, like Brad Pitt or Glenn Close) doesn’t have to be a problem.

I don’t think it’s better than Lawrence, but I should mention the possibility of Clancy. I personally prefer the jump from Lawrence, though: the -Cl- blend at the beginning of Clancy makes it more difficult for my mind to separate out the nickname.

I wonder if you would like Lanson. Clearly there is a repeating-endings issue with your first son’s name, but I see a fair amount of this in the wild, and no one seems upset by it. Jameson/James, Natalie/Tilly, and Lanson/Lance. It loses the one small part of the name that could theoretically be said to relate to his mother, and that bothers me, but on the other hand the Law- connection feels like SUCH a small thing that it’s almost worse than nothing, a crumb.

Or to lean into that crumb: skip Lance, name him Lawson. James has his Jameson, you have your Lawson. (This is making me feel crabby, even though I like the name Lawson.)

Or Landon. You know how people call Prince William “Wills” sometimes? It could be like that, kind of, but…Lance.

Or Landers? A surname name like Jameson, albeit a much more unusual one. I am not keen on the way the -s blends into the T- of your surname.

I don’t like it, but I know it’s a common thing to do with names: you could name him Dylan or Declan or Rylan or Nolan or Lachlan or Alan or Holland or something, and get Lance from that. Especially in the case of Holland, people would understand why you wouldn’t want to nickname him Holly. (But I think this is just as true of Lawrence, where people would understand that this was not the era for Larry or Laurie.)

I just read a book with a good Langston. Could we get Lance from that? Langston, Langst, Lanst, Lance?

Okay, wait. Cortland/Courtland. The Cort-/Court- from your name, and then the -lan part that, since the full name is a namesake name, is perhaps more understandable to use as a nickname? “We named him Courtland after me, but he goes by Lance so it’s less confusing!” Can we make that fly? Jameson/James, Natalie/Tilly, and Cortland/Lance?

Or to abandon Lance completely: first name Beckett for your mom, Court as the middle after you. Or even middle name Courtney after you: as usage of the name decreases in the U.S., its unisex nature becomes more pronounced (according to the Social Security Administration, there were 156 new baby girls and 61 new baby boys given the name in 2020; at the name’s peak in 1990, it was given to 15,379 new baby girls and 675 new baby boys). Jameson/James, Natalie/Tilly, and Beckett/Beck.

Daniel came to mind when I was just sort of saying Samuel and Lance and looking for sound similarities, so I thought I’d mention it just in case. I know it’s a very different style of name than Lance, but it’s similar in style to Samuel.

Also Vincent, nickname Vince.

But really, when I read your idea of Lawrence/Lance, I thought “YES” and was impressed. It seems to me like the nickname Lance makes the name Lawrence fresher and more usable: I know you were working from the other direction, but I think that’s the outcome anyway, and in fact I expect this post to lead to more little Lawrence/Laurence/Lances as other parents search online and find your work-around.

 

 

 

Name update:

Hello!

I wanted to update you and thank one of your readers for helping us decide on the name for our 3rd and final baby. After reading through your response and going through the very helpful comments, we came to the conclusion that while we both loved the name Lance, my husband couldn’t get on board with Lawrence as the legal name. One sweet commenter came up with the name of Lanston and I loved the sound combined with our last name. Lanston “Lance” Beck was born last week and we are settling into our family of 5. Thanks again for all the advice and naming wisdom!

Courtney

Middle Name Challenge: Baby Girl Corinne _______ Kitten

29 Replies

Dear Swistle,

I’ve started and deleted an email to you so many times, hoping inspiration would strike, but I think we’re really stuck! We are expecting our daughter Corinne in mid-September, and we cannot decide on a middle name:

– To give you an idea of style, we chose Corinne for several reasons. It’s always been on my list because it’s uncommon but not unusual; relatively easy to say and spell; and I don’t know any. It also happens to be my husband’s great grandmother’s name. Her family called her Coco.
– Her last name is Kitten, but with an “a” instead of the “i”.
– Corinne is our first and likely only child. She has all girl cousins: Caroline Rose, Nora Kate, Audrey Joanne, Eden Abigail, Samantha and Brooklyn (family middle names we would not use.)
– We are cognizant of initials, so middle names like Olivia would not work.
– Names we have considered: Elena, Cecilia, Celeste, Elise or Elisa; family names Adele, May (or Maye) or Vivian, (but I don’t like the triple “n” sound – Corinne Vivian Kitten seems to be a bit much to me); Josephine, Genevieve.
– My husband’s grandmother recently passed away, and we would love to honor her but haven’t come up with anything. Her name was Doris, which we don’t care for; her maiden name was Quicksilver. In the Jewish naming tradition, we would love to use one of those initials, but haven’t found anything we love.

Can you help us find something that flows? Thank you!

– Monica and Dave

 

From your list, my favorites are Corinne Josephine Kitten and Corinne Genevieve Kitten. With a first name and a last name that both have two syllables, both begin in a hard-C/K sound, and both end in an -n sound, I find I want variety in the middle: more syllables, different sounds. Although I find I also like ANOTHER two-syllable name there: Corinne Elise, Corinne Adele—and I like the idea of a family name, so Corinne Adele Kitten stands out, and joins the favorites.

Quicksilver is a delightful family name. Is there any chance you’d like to use that as-is? Corinne Quicksilver Kitten. I am so envious of people with good family surnames to use as middles. The only thing that bothers me about it is that then the child has three honor names from her father’s side of the family, and none from her mother’s. Perhaps your own family’s surname as the middle? Or another surname from your side of the family?

Or your first name? Corinne Monica Kitten. I love that. I know I just said a couple paragraphs ago that I wanted new sounds in the middle—but repeating that hard-C/K sound and the N-sound but in the MIDDLE of the middle name is very pleasing to my ear. The whole name sort of SNAPS. This is probably my first choice, though I am still tempted by Corinne Quicksilver Kitten.

For more ideas starting with Q or D, I recommend looking through the comments on Our Favorite Baby Names Starting with Q and Our Favorite Baby Names Starting with D. Q names are scarce, but there are tons of good D names. Putting some of my own favorites with Corinne: Corinne Delaney Kitten, Corinne Dahlia Kitten, Corinne Darcy Kitten, Corinne Delphine Kitten.

Part of what may be tripping us up, I think, is the second-syllable emphasis of Corinne. I can’t decide if I like to REPEAT that emphasis (Corinne Elise, Corinne Adele, Corinne Celeste, Corinne Joelle, Corinne Simone, Corinne Louise) or go against it (Corinne Josephine, Corinne Genevieve, Corinne Eleanor, Corinne Henrietta), or something in between (Corinne Elizabeth, Corinne Veronica, Corinne Penelope, Corinne Francesca, Corinne Matilda, Corinne Emilia, Corinne Petunia). I think I lean somewhat toward the in-between ones: names with three or four syllables, but with the emphasis on the second syllable. Here’s a post we did on four-syllable names with second-syllable emphasis, but I think I like the sound of three-syllable-with-second-syllable-emphasis even better:

Corinne Bettina Kitten
Corinne Bianca Kitten
Corinne Diantha Kitten
Corinne Eliza Kitten
Corinne Fiona Kitten
Corinne Francesca Kitten
Corinne Georgina Kitten
Corinne Gianna Kitten
Corinne Louisa Kitten
Corinne Lucinda Kitten
Corinne Matilda Kitten
Corinne Mackenzie Kitten
Corinne Marina Kitten
Corinne Melinda Kitten
Corinne Minerva Kitten
Corinne Miranda Kitten
Corinne Naomi Kitten
Corinne Regina Kitten
Corinne Rosella Kitten
Corinne Sabrina Kitten
Corinne Sophia Kitten
Corinne Susannah Kitten
Corinne Theresa Kitten

And some names just DECLINE TO FLOW, and that’s okay! We say the entire name at graduations, and that’s about it. So it is also okay to choose something that doesn’t necessarily flow, but makes you happy in another way: a good honor name, a name you wish you could have used as a first name but couldn’t, etc.

 

 

 

Name update:

I’m glad I wrote in when I did, as our sweet girl made an early appearance at 29 weeks weighing 2.5 lbs. She is thriving in the NICU thus far, and we can’t wait to bring her home.

This did, however, lead to an “oh crap! we need a middle name!” moment in the hospital. I fought for Quicksilver but lost that battle. We read through the list of suggestions and the one that got the best “oooh, I like that!” response was: Lucille! It’s the name of the restaurant where we had our first date, it gives nice initials, and it’s a little whimsical. Thank you all for your thoughts! Picture to follow when she’s free of all the medical gear.

Baby Boy or Girl Kormushoff; Remi Sunshine

37 Replies

Dear Swistle community,

Thank you for considering our baby naming adventure!

To say we are thrilled to welcome this baby at the start of August is an understatement. Our journey to this point was a long and hard one and we are so grateful to have this little one in our family at long last. This is our first and I have been baby crazy for oh say 20 years with a long list of names I loved to refine through the years. Through all the years I had the tendency to think about names in groupings – a little duo of a first and middle name.

That’s where the fun twist comes in. To shorten a long and personal story, during an especially dark time of the TTC (trying to conceive) journey my cousin who is like a sister had a dream that I had a baby named Remi Sunshine. I latched onto her dream and it pulled me through an extremely tough time – I made Remi Sunshine all my passwords, my visualizing exercises and my efforts to have some trust and faith that our Remi Sunshine would make their way to us had me using this name for 5 months before I got pregnant…and then once pregnant I knew this was our little Remi Sunshine. I’ve been through so much with this name I can’t leave it behind now, and luckily my husband is on board to incorporate Remi or Sunshine as either the first or middle name.

This makes my list pretty tricky since so many of my favorites had already been considered a pair.

We are both fans of the name Remi for either boy or girl and I do think Sunshine could be really sweet for a girl. Baby’s last name will be my husband’s last name, Kormushoff, so not exactly a free flowing last name.

We’re having a hard time deciding whether to incorporate Remi as a first or middle name, though we at least know that if it’s a girl Sunshine feels best as a middle name.

Our favorite boy names:
Calvin
August (Gus)
Hugh or Hugo
Louis
Roman

Our favorite girl names:
Louisa
Gemma
Willa
Georgina
Genevieve
Marigold
Mirabel
Ophelia

We are open to additional names to consider (particularly boy names because we find those harder) and would love thoughts on how to combine Remi or Sunshine for a name that feels like its own intentional duo.

Thanks so much!
Brenna

 

I gave this a little time to simmer, and I can tell you that for myself, if this were my situation, I think there are three ways to handle this that would satisfy me.

  1. Give the child the first/middle names Remi Sunshine.

  2. Give the child “Remi Sunshine” as the middle name. A child who doesn’t like any part of that middle name can drop one or the other on forms as they get older, but the whole name, as you have been using it, is included and intact. Calvin Remi Sunshine Kormushoff. Louisa Remi Sunshine Kormushoff. (Don’t be alarmed by HOW MUCH NAME this is. Middle names are used on the birth certificate and birth announcements, and then it’s pretty much just First Last from then until high school graduation. My daughter’s name, for example, is 30 letters long, divided among four names, and no one has ever said “Wow, that’s a lot of name!”—in large part because they only know her by her first/last.) (Not that “a lot of name” is a bad thing, even if someone DID think/say it! Think of the royals and their fabulous names that never quit!)

  3. Give the child a name that does not include Remi or Sunshine, but then call the child Remi Sunshine interchangeably with their given name, as a special nickname that others may or may not pick up on. I’d probably make it a whole THING: personalized wall art with that nickname; “Remi Sunshine” on a baby blanket; etc.

 

For ME (and this is going to be HIGHLY SUBJECTIVE, and it’s only YOUR OWN subjective that matters here, but input from others can help clarify your own feelings), it would not satisfy me to, for example, use Remi as the middle name without Sunshine, or Sunshine without Remi; the special name, to me, feels like it is “Remi Sunshine,” the whole thing.

In your case, since you say you’ve always imagined names in first-middle pairings, that second idea (using “Remi Sunshine” as the middle name) may not be what makes you happy. Or you might find that breaking up the firsts/middles (especially when this is no longer a fun pre-baby game but is instead a two-parent job for a baby on the way) is one of the things you’re willing to do to make baby-naming work for this child and for this particular special name. It happens for most of us that there comes a point when two preferences are in opposition to each other, and in those situations the preferences need to be weighed: which is more important to you, giving this baby the name Remi Sunshine, or sticking with specific name pairings you came up with before the dream, before this baby?

I would like to add a possibility that you have likely already considered, but that many women don’t DEEP-DOWN consider until much later when they wonder why they didn’t: it doesn’t have to be your husband’s family surname. It could be yours, if yours is nicer and/or works better. It’s not too late for this idea, even if you took your husband’s family surname when you married; that’s a decision that can be re-made at any time.

Because I had to look it up, I want to give some U.S. usage data about the names Remi and Sunshine. I think of Remi as a boy name (despite not knowing any children named Remi), but in the U.S. its usage is currently unisex leaning girl: 2,185 new baby girls and 312 new baby boys named Remi in 2020; the spelling Remy was used for 610 new baby girls and 865 new baby boys. (Did the dream specify the spelling? or is “Remi” your cousin’s interpretation of the spelling? or is it YOUR interpretation of the spelling?) The name Sunshine, which could theoretically be a neutral noun name, and certainly should be usable as a middle name for boys alongside a trend of giving baby girls middle names such as James, was used in 2020 for 71 new baby girls, and there is no recorded use of it for boys (though of course we don’t know about middle-name usage). For better or worse (it’s worse), we as a culture think light pretty names are great for girls but not for boys. Still, I would feel comfortable using it as a second middle name for a boy, especially with the story to explain it. If he feels the negative pressure our culture asserts on topics such as this, then on the rare occasions when “What’s your middle name?” comes up, he can just say “Remi.” (But frankly, I would find it entirely charming to find out that a man’s second middle name was Sunshine, especially if he was kind of charmingly bashful about it, like he knew the information would surprise and delight.)