Melanie writes:

I really need help with a sibling name to go with our son Maxwell Christopher.

Need both boy and girls names

Our last name is graves

I feel that as maxwell is always shortened down to max and my name melanie is always mel and my husband Christopher is always chris the new arrival should follow the same.

I would love the middle name for a girl to be Tegan and I don’t know about the boy.

Thanks for your help

Because you have two M names in the family, it would be fun if this new baby could be a second C name. I don’t generally try to coordinate children’s names with parents’ names, but it can be a fun exercise when it’s hard to know where to start. So here are some C names that might work:

Caitlin/Caitlyn (Cait)
Calla (Cal)
Callie (Cal)
Camilla (Cam)
Camille (Cam)
Campbell (Cam)
Camryn (Cam, Bell)
Cassandra (Cass)
Cassidy (Cass)
Clara (Clare)
Clarissa (Clare)
Colette (Cole)

Caden (Cade)
Callum (Cal)
Calvin (Cal)
Camden (Cam)
Cameron (Cam)
Cason (Case)
Charles (Chaz)
Colby (Cole)
Coleman (Cole)
Colton (Cole, Colt)
Cooper (Coop)

If the C name idea doesn’t appeal, here are some more possibilities to consider:

Annabel (Ann, Belle)
Aubrey (Bree)
Brianna (Bree)
Brinley (Brin)
Delaney (Del, Lane)
Eleanor (Elle, Nell)
Elena (Elle)
Elizabeth (Bess)
Ella (Elle)
Emerson (Em)
Emilia (Em)
Emmeline (Em)
Eva (Eve)
Finley (Finn)
Gabriella (Bree)
Isabel (Belle)
Jaden (Jade)
Josephine (Jo)
Julia (Jules)
Katherine (Kate, Kay)
Kailey (Kay)
Olivia (Liv)
Penelope (Nell)
Rebecca (Bec, Bex)
Sabrina (Bree)
Samantha (Sam)
Skylar (Sky)
Tessa (Tess)
Vivian (Viv)

Alexander (Xan)
Bennett (Ben)
Henry (Hank)
Isaac (Ike, Zac)
Jacob (Jake)
Jayden (Jay)
Joseph (Joe)
Kyler (Ky)
Lucas (Luke)
Nathan (Nate)
Nicholas (Nick, Cole)
Samuel (Sam)
Theodore (Ted)
Wesley (Wes)
William (Will)
Wilson (Will)
Zachary (Zac/Zack/Zach)

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C. writes:

I am really torn and would love to hear from you and your readers regarding the name for my baby boy.

He is due in 9 weeks and I will be a single mom, so he is taking my last name, which is Lanzetta. My absolute favorite name is Luca, the problem is I have never exactly been a fan of alliterative names as I feel they can sound too “cutesy,” but didn’t plan on having to use my last name for my child until now. My plan has been to call the baby John Luca, as John is a family name (my grandfather’s, who is deceased) and it would be nice to honor him. However I plan on strictly calling the baby Luca, and don’t want to unnecessarily burden him with the hassles that come with having to always explain that he goes by his middle name. I am rethinking everything now and really wondering if I am making the right decision.

I know there have been other posts regarding using middle names as first names, and I have taken into consideration the pros and cons, so my question is, am I being silly in not using my absolute favorite name as a first name just because of the double L’s, especially when I plan on calling him only Luca anyway? Does the name sound too “cutesy?” I feel that when he grows up, John Luca may go over better professionally, but other than that I’m not really that big a fan of just the name John by itself and would hope he wouldn’t choose to go by that instead. On the other hand, I do like the flow of John Luca together and cannot think of a name that seems suitable as a middle name if I go with Luca as a first name. I just don’t think Luca John sounds quite right, so definitely open to suggestions and input here as well in terms of a middle name.

Finally, if I end up getting married one day, our last name will change, so it’s possible the alliterative thing would no longer be a factor. I know that I can’t plan for that or base his name off just the chance of this happening, but I can’t help but think this is a very real possibility.

What are your thoughts? I am having such a hard time making a decision and could really use your advice. Please help!!

Thank you!

I think if he’ll be known exclusively as Luca Lanzetta either way, it doesn’t help to make Luca his middle name. It’s all con and no pro: it adds the confusion/explanations of going by a middle name, and it doesn’t avoid any of the alliteration unless he ends up going by John, which you’d prefer he didn’t.

Luca Lanzetta is definitely alliterative (not only the repeating L-, but also the repeating -a at the end), but alliteration is a matter of taste: if it’s not too alliterative for you, I don’t think you have to rule it out just because alliteration is something you didn’t think you wanted. I think that happens a lot in baby-naming: we go into it thinking we want one thing, and before we know it, a particular name is overruling our rules.

I am usually not fond of alliteration, but I think Luca Lanzetta works very well. Part of it, I think, is the particular blend of syllables and sounds and rhythm: Luca Lazna wouldn’t work as well, for example. Another part of it is that Luca is an Italian boy name, and Lanzetta is a surname that brings that out beautifully. It doesn’t strike my ear as cutesy.

I think John sounds great as the middle name, and I like that it’s a family name. But if it isn’t working for you, I wonder if there are any other family members you’d like to honor. Are there any good surnames in the family tree that would work as middle names? Any authors or philosophers or actors or scientists you admire? Any names you liked a lot but didn’t want to use as a first name? If you love the name John except for something about the rhythm/sound just seeming a little off, I’d go ahead and use it: it’s rare for middle names to make much of an appearance after the birth announcements go out, and also rare for all three names to be said together. Or you could leave the middle name blank for now, and choose something later.

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Emily writes:

Hello! We are expecting our third son in July and are struggling with names. Our other children are Oliver Beckett and Silas Athen. Our last name is short (Howe) so I feel that one-syllable first names don’t flow as nicely as longer ones. My husband and I are both teachers so that can make thinks trickier. I tend to gravitate towards “older” choices. I believe we’ve settled on Douglas for a middle since our other boys have family names from my side and Douglas would honor my father-in-law and this will be our last baby.

Here are some from our list:
Whitaker: probably the front-runner right now but…too long? Too surname-y? Too close to his brother’s -er ending? I do like Whit as a nn.
Everett: I don’t love Ev as a short version; also, husband isn’t a fan.
Clement: Seems I like a -t ending. Too like the sausage company, but I think Clem is a cute nn.
Milo: Love but not the O ending in combo w our last name.
Hawthorne: Too much alliteration? Too “out there”?
Leopold: I like Leo as a nn but, like Milo, not in combination with our last name.
Linden: My mother’s name was Linda and I’d love to honor her but I’m afraid this sounds too feminine and also offers no suitable nn. This would be incorporated as either a first or middle with a varied spelling if we were having a girl.

I want to looooove this name and I’m just not there yet. Any input and/or suggestions would be welcome!

Thank you!

Amy writes:

Hello!

I am writing you to see if you could give me some advice on which names you think will go well for our second little girl- due in Oct! I know I am a little early with this but I am 100% a planner :-) Our last name is Do@ley (@ is an o). My daughters name is Avery Elizabeth- which we love. We are a big fan of unisex and surnamy type names. And I would love to incorporate a family name somehow- whether it is a first or middle name. Some of my issues are that I don’t want to have a name that ends in the “lee” sound. So it sounds matchy-matchy with our last name. When we decided on Avery we thought the “reee” was different enough from “leee” to work.

Below is our short list and would like to get your opinion:

Harper- we love this name but I am worried it might be too trendy- like Tiffany in the 80’s
Emerson – with the nn Emmie (but I am worried it might sound too similar to my name, Amy- but does that matter??)
Parker- this is a family name. I love it – but I might be too much of a wuss to name my daughter that
Blake- Also a family name. I don’t like Blakely b/c I knew a girl in college with that name…and the lee sound at the end.
Hayden
Bridget- way off base here in our style…but I do like it!

I also would prefer not to use a name that is overly popular and in the top 10.

If you have any advice and suggestions I would be forever grateful! Thanks so much!

Looking just at the first names, my top choices from your list with Avery are Harper and Parker. I think both are great with Avery. I don’t think Harper is too trendy and I don’t think Parker is too bold.

However, I notice that when I say Harper Do@ley or Parker Do@ley, they sound slightly amusing to me—like children’s book characters, a little bit. I’m not sure what it is. It doesn’t seem to be the -er sound or the P sound, even though the names have those in common. Blake Do@ley and Hayden Do@ley hit my ear wrong, too, but in a different way—and again I can’t quite put my finger on the issue. Blake Do@ley seems abrupt, and Hayden Do@ley is hard for me to say.

I wonder if it might be an issue of syllables: all the names that don’t sound quite right to me are either one- or two-syllable names. The three syllables of Avery work very well, and so I think I might look in that direction. Emerson Do@ley would be perfect, but I do think Emmie and Amy are a little close. Not so close that you couldn’t use it, though: if the similarity resulted in confusion or hassle, she could be called Emerson instead.

Would you like Addison Do@ley? Addy and Amy look similar but sound quite different. Addison Do@ley; Avery and Addison.

Or Ellison. Ellie Do@ley is a little L-heavy, but not enough to make me rule out the name: I’m much less worried about how nicknames fit with the surname. Ellison Do@ley; Avery and Ellison.

Or Madigan. Madigan Do@ley; Avery and Madigan.

Or Kerrigan. Kerrigan Do@ley; Avery and Kerrigan.

Devany and Evanie would both be nice, but Devany Do@ley might be too alliterative, and Avery and Evanie might be too similar in sound.

McKenna, maybe. McKenna Do@ley; Avery and McKenna.

Teagan is only two syllables, but I still like it. Teagan Do@ley; Avery and Teagan.

A. writes:

We are expecting boy/girl twins this summer. We have a 2-year old son William who we call Liam. Naming him was a breeze because we always knew if we had a boy we wanted to name him after my husband’s late father. But naming these new babies is a different ball game.

We were leaning heavily toward Noah Luke for the boy and Charlie Jane for the girl (all family names which we like using if we can) but I have hesitations with each of those. Noah is so popular right now. Liam is very popular too but we loved it so much we didn’t care. We really like Noah but I don’t think we LOVE it enough to not be bothered that it has become more common. And we both think Charlie is darling for a girl but I worry that a) it might not be feminine enough since it wouldn’t be short for anything (we don’t really like Charlotte or any of the other names it might be short for) and b) when we list off all three kids names together it would sound like three boys: Liam, Noah and Charlie. We like the idea of actually calling her Charlie Jane a lot but I know the Jane will get dropped a decent amount of the time.

Now we are leaning more towards using Charles/Charlie for the boy with either Luke or Dean as his middle name (both family names). We really love Charlie and feel pretty confident we want to use it for one of the babies. Like Liam, even though Charlie is pretty popular/common, we like it enough that we don’t really care. And now we are considering Magnolia Jane for the girl and mostly calling her Maggie. My husband LOVES the name Maggie and I think it is pretty cute but I don’t know if I’m sold yet plus I wonder if Magnolia is too random and off the wall if our boys will have more traditional names like William and Charles? I like that the twins would be Charlie and Maggie which sounds more distinctly boy and girl and I think Liam, Charlie and Maggie goes pretty well together but we have talked this in circles so much that I am losing perspective. :)

Do you have thoughts on the Magnolia/Maggie idea and whether it fits in or any suggestions of other girl names we might consider? I tend to like more traditional or old fashioned names for girls and my husband tends to like cuter, more tomboy-ish names for girls so a more classic full name with a cute nickname is likely to suit both of our tastes. We are sold on using Jane as her middle name as that is a family name we love. (Oh, and our surname is Wallis.)

Any help you can offer would be amazing!
Thank you!

I liked your point about not being sure you love a name enough to ignore its popularity. I frequently encourage parents to use the name they love even if it’s a popular name, and so if you loved the name Noah and were going to use a name you liked much less only because of popularity, my first instinct would be to talk you out of that idea. But your clarification shows that’s not what’s going on here.

If I heard of the sibling group Liam, Noah, and Charlie, I would assume Charlie was a boy. In this case, it’s because the name Charlie fits very well in style as a brother name, but is a completely different style as a sister name. It’s common for parents to have a different preferred style for boy names and for girl names, and that generally works just fine; but in this case the particular girl-name choice happens to fall exactly into the same group of names as your boy-name style, which is what’s catching your eye as a potential issue. The style-match as a boy name and the style-mismatch as a girl name all but forces the name to click incorrectly into place as Boy. For this sibling group I prefer your alternate idea of finding a long feminine name with a short boyish nickname: if you loved the name Charlotte, you’d be all set.

I love that you can still use Charlie for the boy twin: it really is great with Liam, and the name Charles Wallis makes me think pleasantly of Charles Wallace (Wallace was his middle name) from the book A Wrinkle in Time. In fact, the Charles/Charlie and Magnolia/Maggie twin set seems beyond perfect to me (perhaps in part because Charles Wallace’s sister’s name was Margaret/Meg). William/Liam and Charles/Charlie are extremely compatible brother names/nicknames, and Maggie fits beautifully and is great with the middle name Jane. The name Magnolia is more unusual than William and Charles and a somewhat different style, but it’s a compatible style and not one that leads to confusion or clashing. And if you do switch Charlie from your girl-name choice to your boy-name choice, I think that makes it particularly fun that the new girl-name choice Magnolia includes all the sounds of the previous boy-name choice Noah. But if Magnolia continues to feel too adventurous for your tastes, Margaret/Maggie is terrific with William/Liam and Charles/Charlie. I like the way both twins would have the “ar” sound in their given names: Charles and Margaret. But I guess I would hesitate a little at making such a strong apparent reference to A Wrinkle in Time.

The only preference left out by Magnolia/Maggie (or Margaret/Maggie) is the preference for a boyish nickname. If you wanted to keep looking to find something a little more like Charlie, here are some possibilities:

Antonia/Toni
Augusta/Gus/Gussie (too much S with surname?)
Bernadette/Bennie/Bernie
Calista/Cal
Colette/Cole
Danica/Danny
Francesca/Frankie/Frank
Georgia/Georgie/George
Georgianna/Georgie/George
Josephine/Jo
Katherine/Kit
Louisa/Lou
Philomena/Phil
Matilda/Mattie
Theodora/Theo
Thomasina/Tommie/Tom
Veronica/Ronnie/Ron
Winifred/Freddie/Fred

Gabe writes:

Hello!
I have a dilemma and I think it might be ridiculous but none the less I need baby name help stat!!

My wife is due June 10! We are expecting a girl we already have a daughter. Her name is Brylee Grace Rodriguez. We liked the idea of Hope for a middle name. An we came across Breelyn for the first name.

We have been calling her this for months but now I am thinking its so similar to Brylee. Am I overthinking it? Need help fast! I’ve been digging back into names but no luck! My wife and daughter were set on Breelyn.

Please help!!!
Gabe

Dad’s name is Elias Gabriel
Mom’s name Kayla Danielle

Names off limits
Maddison
Chloe
Ava
Giuliana
Danika
Elyssa
Danae
Dominique
Teagan

They seem much too close to me: both starting with Br-; one containing -lee and the other containing -eel; both including a Y. The names are made up of similar elements: Bree and Lee, and Bry and Lyn. They look at first like two different arrangements of the same letters. My mind immediately starts mixing and matching, getting Briley and Breeley, for example, or Brylyn and Brinley. I found that even after reading the letter many times and studying the names fairly closely, I continued to have trouble remembering which were the actual names under consideration: I had to keep looking back at the original letter. I would recommend noticing the sounds and letters you like, and seeing what other names have a similar sound. Keelyn, for example, or Aubree.

But name similarity can be subjective: one person’s way too close is another person’s adorably matched. Let’s have a poll:

[yop_poll id=”52″]