Hello, Swistle!

My family is expecting a baby girl, arriving this September. I have loved the name Eloise for years, and my husband does too. When we found out we’re having a girl, it seemed like a done deal. Barely thought twice about Eloise. Her middle name will be Anne, which is my middle name, along with my mother and sisters’. Her two-year-old brother is Remington Joseph, who we call Remy.

A few weeks ago I started reconsidering Eloise because of all the “El” names becoming so common. We have close friends with an Ellie, Elliot (girl), Ella, and Eleanor. I know these names are growing in popularity too, and now I’m afraid there will be several “El” names as she gets older, and people will have to think twice about what her name actually is. I love the full name of Eloise, and all the potential nicknames are adorable too — but maybe too common.

What we love about Remy’s name is that it feels unique without being totally off the wall. I’m starting to wonder if Eloise holds that same power. To me, Remy’s name is cool and a bit edgy; is Eloise too sweet and girly? Are the names Remy and Eloise from two different worlds, in the universe of baby names?

Other names considered:

Juliet/Juliette – My husband loves this, and I think it’s beautiful too. However, I don’t love that everyone would immediately think Romeo and Juliet when hearing her name, especially with brother Remy (Remy & Juliet sounds pretty close). I love Romeo and Juliet, but I don’t know if I want my daughter’s name associated with a tragedy/suicide.

Olive – I like this one. Husband does not, but at least entertains the option.

Sylvie – I like this one. Husband does not, but at least entertains the option.

Amelie – We love this name and think it’s perfect with Remy. However, we’d most likely be correcting people throughout her life and she’d mistakenly be called Amelia, especially as that name is growing in popularity too. Not sure about a good nickname either?

I’d love to hear from you and your readers!! All opinions welcome. Thanks so much.

Kellie

I love the name Eloise so much and I would hate to see you rule it out just because El- names are popular right now. On the other hand, I absolutely understand why you’re worried about this, and I would be too if I were you. My younger kids are in school with what feels like a thousand girls nicknamed Addie/Addy/Maddie/Maddy, and I have to admit it steers me away from even the much less common Ad-/Mad- names.

Well. I am not sure what to advise. My inclination is to push you to use Eloise. My own kids’ classmates have nowhere near as many Ellies as Addies/Maddies (I am sitting here with Edward, age 14, and he says he doesn’t know any Ellies at all—but I wish I could ask Elizabeth, because she is far more aware of such things; also I know she knows two Ellas), which makes me feel as if the El- names are not as much of an issue. But…my own youngest kids are 12, 14, and 14, which is like a half generation older than your new baby! The daycares might be currently PACKED with Ellies, and your own experience lines up with that possibility. I would hugely value input on this from those of you with littler kids: are you finding you’re surrounded by Ellerys and Elizabeths and Eliettes and Eleanors, all going by Ellie? Does it put you off of El- names a little, as I have been a little put off of Ad-/Mad- names?

I wonder if you would like the name Louisa.

To move on to other questions, I don’t see Eloise as too sweet and girly. Not that it doesn’t contain sweetness and femininity, but my first associations are with the bold and cheerfully naughty Eloise of the Kay Thompson books. Style-wise, I think of the name as belonging with other formidable-yet-fun-to-say choices such as Georgia, Philippa, Margaret, Eleanor. And I don’t see any issues with it as a sister name for a Remington/Remy; it seems to me like a nice fit.

Looking at the other finalists, I think the Olive/Olivia and Amelie/Amelia/Emily confusion issues would bother me more than the El- names issue, especially since Olivia and Amelia are both Top Ten names and you’d prefer something less popular. I was going to say I wasn’t bothered by the Shakespearean Juliet(te) associations (though I think I personally would get weary of the jokes), but Remy and Juliet does seem too evocative for my own preferences. I like the name Sylvie a lot, and even better as a nickname for Sylvia; I like it less with the surname, because of the almost-but-not-quite-alliteration of S- and Sch-, but that’s a very subjective thing.

Of your options, my definite favorite is Eloise, and I find myself hoping you will use it.

I am just back from a series of vacations and road trips, and I am sipping coffee sullenly, preparing to go to the grocery store, and wondering if there will ever be anything fun again. Let’s see if we can think of something fun to do.

Oh! I know! My mom and I refer to “the mall test” for baby names. It doesn’t have to be the mall: the term comes from the days when we did most of our shopping at the mall (convenient for shopping/lunching with children in strollers), but it can be anywhere you’re out and about. We noticed that when we heard a name used in public (often in the toddler play area), it sometimes changed our whole feeling about the name. We might think we LOVED a particular name, and then we’d hear a parent calling to their child using that name and realize we didn’t like the name at all. Or it could also happen the other way: we’d hear a parent call out a name we’d never considered before, and suddenly we LOVED the name. (This happened to me with the name Georgia.)

I recently heard a name used a couple of times by a parent in a waiting room, and then again called out by the nurse, and I wouldn’t have been sure if this name would pass the mall test or not but it DID: Delia.

Have you had any names pass the mall test recently? (It seems like it would be unkind to list the names we’ve seen fail the mail test.) Any names you hadn’t considered until you heard them used in public, and now you love them? Any names you might have thought you were meh about, or even disliked, but then you heard them in action and changed your mind?

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Hello Swistle and readers!

I wrote to you eight years ago requesting help for choosing a middle name for our daughter. She is now a spunky 7.5 year old and Annabelle Jane suits her perfectly. We had planned to call her Annie, but for some reason it never stuck and she is, definitively, Annabelle. She loves her name and so do we!

I had to chuckle at my sweet 26yo first time mom self when rereading my old request, because I had so many other names picked out. Flash forward several years of infertility later, and I am finally pregnant with our miracle second baby thanks to IVF. I’m currently 33 weeks and we don’t know the sex of this baby. Our naming tastes have changed and evolved a bit over the years, so we’ve scrapped the other names we had chosen and have new ones for this baby. If it’s a boy he’ll be Theodore Jon (nickname Teddy/Theo which we love, Jon is my late father’s name). A girl was going to be Elizabeth Rose (possible nickname Libby).

My MIL brought my husband’s old baby book to us as a sentimental gift this past weekend, and as I was looking through it I saw something I’d somehow in 18 years of being together never noticed- her middle name is Elizabeth. My husband hadn’t made the connection either. Let’s just say that while we’re on decent terms, neither of us want to name the baby after her or have her think we did (and explaining specifically that the name isn’t for her seems rather awkward and rude!).

So I’m back to square one with a girl name. Some other names I’d tossed around this time around were Josephine, Eleanor, Margaret, Vivian, Evelyn, Penelope, and Amelia, and Matilda. My husband loves (and I like) Adelaide, but we think it might be too close to Annabelle. I tend to lean toward toward the antique/classic/vintage names, and my husband tends to favor more modern names like Mackenzie (although really he has few ideas of what he likes and lots of “I don’t like that but I don’t know why).

I’d love some suggestions! We have several possible middle names and would like to stick to a one syllable middle, so mostly I just need a new first name! We are Jennifer and Kyle from the 80s, and so would prefer something a little less popular! Our last name is Hirchert, pronounced HER-kit.

Jennifer Hirchert

I am a little happy the name Elizabeth got bumped: I hope I don’t have to assure anyone how dearly I love the name Elizabeth, but WITH ANNABELLE, I prefer some of the other names on your list. The name Annabelle has a whimsy/charm I’d like to see repeated in a sibling name, and I think the strengths of the name Elizabeth lie elsewhere. Particularly since you’re looking for something a little less common, and the name Elizabeth has been out of the Top 25 only one time (1948, when it dipped to #26) since searchable Social Security Administration online records begin in 1900—and it has spent a LOT of those years in the Top 10.

The names that first catch my eye from your list are Josephine, Penelope, and Matilda: they all have that touch of whimsy I’m looking for. I think you might find Eleanor, Evelyn, and Amelia more common than you’d like: Evelyn and Amelia are both currently in the Top 10, and Eleanor is making a beeline for it. Though this is where I ought to say that Penelope too is getting increasingly popular, and is currently a little more popular than Eleanor (Eleanor was #32 in 2018; Penelope was #26). I continue to stand behind Penelope anyway for three reasons: (1) I personally know fewer Penelopes than Eleanors so it FEELS less common to me, which I realize is irrelevant and subjective; (2) the name Penelope was high on our list if Henry had been a girl, which I realize is irrelevant; (3) Penelope has the type of whimsy I’m looking for, while Eleanor does not.

I would say that Eleanor is type-of-whimsy-ADJACENT, however: Annabelle and Eleanor pleases me considerably more than Annabelle and Elizabeth. Hm, I am talking myself into Eleanor now. I find I very much like to say “Annabelle and Eleanor.” Vivian is similar to Eleanor for me: it is not quite the whimsy I am looking for but it is adjacent to it. Annabelle and Vivian is a combination I’d put in the same appealing category as Annabelle and Eleanor: something about the dignity of Eleanor/Vivian gives me a little rush paired with the more whimsical Annabelle, but I don’t get that when I pair Annabelle with Elizabeth/Margaret. I think it’s that Eleanor/Vivian are more recent revivals and still have that little smack of surprise for me. Though so does Margaret, so I’m not sure exactly what the difference is.

Would Eliza be far enough removed from Elizabeth to avoid seeming like a tribute? It’s the same first five letters but has a very different sound/style. If your mother-in-law’s FIRST name were Elizabeth it might still seem like a tribute—but since it’s her middle name, and since Elizabeth is such a common name, it seems like it might be safe. Annabelle and Eliza. I love that.

More possibilities:

Beatrix
Cecily
Clarissa
Cordelia
Emmeline
Felicity
Fiona
Genevieve
Ivy
Louise
Lydia
Marigold
Meredith
Polly
Sabrina
Violet
Winifred

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