Hello Swistle,

We need a bit of help as our baby naming duty just doubled! We are due to have twin girls in May. They will be our first children.

For a long time I have loved the name Primrose and lucky for me my partner does as well. Problem is we can’t find a name we love as much as Primrose for our other baby girls. I love the name for it’s whimsical, pretty nature and my husband likes the nick name Rosie. Im nervous the other name we end up using will always be the second best name. I need to love both names. I want our twins to have names that go together but aren’t to matchy matchy.

We both like traditional style British, Irish and French sounding names.
Names on our list include:
Charlotte (very popular),
Florence (we have a close friend who has a child with this name),
Maeve (we both like it but are underwhelmed when we compare it to Primrose),
Penelope for Nell (again we like it but Primrose is so frilly and fun where as Nell is much more serious and plain. Is it to much of a contrast?),
Clara (pretty but again it’s no Primrose),
Adelaide (I don’t like the nick name addy)

Boy names we had considered before finding out the general were Freddie, Alfie, August and Sydney.

Our last name starts with an L and has two syllables.

Please help us find a girls name that we will love as much as Primrose

Thank you
Hillary

I want to start by reassuring you that, mathematically-speaking, it would not be weird if you had a slight preference for one twin’s name over the other’s. That is the way rankings work: when we make a list of things in order, especially things like names, we MIGHT have two things tied for first place, but it is not weird to have first place, second place, third place, and so on; and it is not weird to have first place and then, say, ten names tied for second place, five for third place, twenty for fourth place, and so on. We don’t notice this as much with singleton births (and the passage of time can affect the rankings), but it is completely normal: of COURSE you use your favorite name first! and then of COURSE the next name is Slightly Less Favorite! When you’re choosing more than one name at the same time, it’s more noticeable, but don’t let it send you into a spiral where you are looking endlessly for something that might not exist. Liking the names equally is an admirable goal, and is certainly the STARTING goal—but if we don’t achieve it, it’s not because you’ve failed, it’s because there might literally not BE two names you like equally well. You can adjust the scales of fairness by giving the twin with the first-choice first name the second-choice middle name, and/or by giving the second-choice name to the firstborn twin.

Now, onto the names. With a whimsical, unusual name such as Primrose, I shy away from a traditional, Top 10 name such as Charlotte. Clara is beautiful and one of my own favorite names, but as you say, it’s no Primrose; I feel the same about Maeve. If you don’t like the nickname Addy, I’d cross Adelaide off the list anyway—but also, while it comes much closer than some of the others to holding its own with Primrose, it’s still not quite right.

The two contenders from your list, I think, are Florence and Penelope, but each has an issue. Because the name Florence is unusual and distinctive, I think you may want to avoid duplicating it if a close friend has used it. No one gets exclusive dibs on a name, and you MAY use it; but my guess is that you’d prefer not to, for your own sake as well as for your friend’s.

Penelope has enough whimsy to hold up to Primrose, and the nickname Nell/Nellie is perfect with the nickname Rose/Rosie, but the name Penelope was the 26th most popular girl name in the United States in 2018 (the 2019 data is expected to be available next month), while the name Primrose wasn’t even in the Top 1000. For comparison, in 2018 there were 6,474 new baby girls named Penelope, and 77 named Primrose. That is a significant imbalance. I feel inclined to say it is okay in this case, because the names are just so beautifully suited otherwise, and I think “Penelope and Primrose” will DELIGHT everyone who asks their names. Like, people will keel over with delight. Also because it’s hard to know which is the preferable usage situation, so it’s not like one name is “better”: some people would prefer to be the only person anyone knows with that name; other people would dramatically prefer a familiar name they don’t have to keep explaining; and there is no way to know which way each girl will be. But with the nicknames, you give them OPTIONS: if Primrose wishes with all her heart to have a familiar, common name, she can go her whole life by Rose or Rosie; if Penelope finds herself surrounded by Penelopes, she can go by Nell or Penny or Lola or Pip.

In short, I think Penelope and Primrose is wonderful. If it were me, I would have hesitations about the popularity discrepancy, and I would be nervous that the pairing exceeded the cutesiness quotient, but I think in the end my love for the names might overwhelm that.

For other options, here is my first and favorite suggestion, and I find I am suppressing excitement while also feeling nervous you won’t love it as much as I do: Marigold. Primrose and Marigold; Rosie and Mari/Goldie. If it were me choosing the names, I would be done. I would feel some regret for the loss of the loveliness of Penelope and Primrose, but the evened-out popularity (there were 156 new baby girls named Marigold in 2018) and the coordinated whimsy would DO ME IN. Primrose! and Marigold!

That one is my clear favorite, but here are some others to consider:

Amaryllis; Primrose and Amaryllis; Rosie and Rilla
Calista; Primrose and Calista; Rosie and Callie
Camilla; Primrose and Camilla; Rosie and Cami/Milly
Clotilde; Primrose and Clotilde; Rosie and Tilly
Cordelia; Primrose and Cordelia; Rosie and Delia
Dahlia; Primrose and Dahlia; Rosie and Dolly
Emerald; Primrose and Emerald; Rosie and Emmie
Juniper; Primrose and Juniper; Rosie and Junie
Magnolia; Primrose and Magnolia; Rosie and Maggie
Persephone; Primrose and Persephone; Rosie and Percy/Persie
Winifred; Primrose and Winifred; Rosie and Winnie

We are expecting our first child, a baby boy, this August.

My husband’s far and away favorite name is Liam. While I am not opposed to the name, I worry about its current popularity, including that our child will be one of several Liams in his class, and and how it may seem dated in 10-20 years. I tend to gravitate toward names that are more timeless or have vintage charm.

I recently learned that Liam can be a nickname for William. So, as a compromise, I’ve suggested naming our boy William, and calling him Liam, with the idea that if the name falls out of fashion, our child could opt to use William or another variation of that name. My husband is not convinced by this, and thinks it will be confusing to give him the name William while expecting people to call him Liam.

My name is Katherine, and I’ve gone by Katy my whole life, so I see no issue with having a nickname.

Our last name sounds like McKeg, and I think both Liam and William sound equally nice with the last name.

Other top choices for boy names include James, Thomas, and Henry.

Top choices for a middle name include Michael, Thomas, and Xavier.

Any input you have would be appreciated!

Thanks,

Katy

The name Liam is currently a common nickname for William. It will only be confusing to the same category of people who say with genuine surprise “But that’s an old man / old lady name!” about vintage revival names in the Top 10.

If Liam is far and away your husband’s favorite name, and you are offering this perfectly reasonable compromise that makes the name work for you (as well as making it a much better fit with the other boy names on your list), I am feeling pretty cranky that he is “not convinced.” If he continues to insist it has to be his own exact top choice with no adjustments, and/or that a perfectly ordinary and familiar name/nickname combination might be confusing for others, I would be inclined to say that in that case the name has to be out of the running, and the two of you should decide together on James, Thomas, or Henry.

If you do decide on William/Liam, I like either Thomas or Xavier for the middle name, only because Liam Michael blends for me into Leah Michael—which likely won’t be a daily issue, so if Michael is your definite favorite, I don’t think this has to be a dealbreaker. Just, if you’re equally fond of all three, I’d lean away from the M- one.

Which brings me to something more likely to be a daily issue, which is Liam with the surname. Henry has a friend named Liam Matthews (always called Liam Matthews because there are several Liams in the grade); and, because I knew who I was talking about, “Liam Matthews” didn’t at first sound like Leah Matthews to me. But my mother thought for a long time that Henry had a friend named Leah, and a bunch of times Paul thought we were talking about someone named Leah. It was a persistent enough issue that I started saying “Liam (Liam Matthews)” instead of just “Liam Matthews.” If your surname really does start with M, it’s something to be aware of—particularly because he will almost certainly be known as Liam McKeg or Liam M. to distinguish him from other Liams.

Dear Swistle,

This August we’re expecting our second child. We call Josephine (1 1/2) by her full name, though we are open to nicknames developing (my personal favorite being Posie).

For daughter #2, our top choice is Alice.

I’m wary of the way Alice sounds with our last name (pronounced like emmaus-without-the-E). I feel like the repetitive “iss” sound makes it sound oddly scientific/Latin, especially with the matching number of syllables.

We love the name Elise, but I would want to use it as a nickname for Elisabeth, a family name (both maternal great-grandmother and godmother/aunt of the baby are named Elizabeth).

My husband is completely against the idea of deciding on a nickname from birth/giving one name but having them go by another.

So it comes down to Elisabeth or Alice. Or, is it just Elisabeth? I keep struggling with the sound of the full name with Alice! Am I imagining an issue where there isn’t one?

Thanks for any input and advice!

Best,

Lauren

Extra info:
– We’re a Belgian-American family, living in Belgium. Classic names tend to sound good in both English and Flemish.
– Josephine is named after her paternal great-grandmother
– We like Julie, but don’t want two J-names
– We like Clementine and Olivia, but don’t feel like they’re right for this baby
– The middle name(s, we give two) don’t need to be considered
– we hope to have three children

I began by looking up how to pronounce Emmaus, and for those of you in the same boat, it’s roughly em-MAY-us or eh-MAY-iss, that’s the gist of it.

With that surname (minus the first syllable), I don’t like the sound of either Alice or Elise: the S-sound of the endings just hits my ear very wrong, especially with Alice where the vowel sound also matches, making something close to a rhyme. So my definite choice among the options is Elisabeth without calling her Elise. And I think Elisabeth is terrific with the name Josephine. And I love that it is honoring two women in your family.

Hello!

We are expecting our third kiddo (a boy) and cannot agree upon a name from our very limited list of ideas so far.

My husband and I are Jenny and Bryan, last name is two syllables and starts with a B. Our daughter is Elizabeth Louise (Lizzie) and our son is August Charles (Gus).

We like classic / traditional names that can be shortened to less common or punchy sounding nicknames. There is family history to both first and middle names of our first two children. In hindsight, we wished we would have not used Charles as a middle name for our first son so that this baby could be Charles (Charlie or Chas) which is a family name. We are also feeling much more pressure this time around to select a name that goes well with the sibling set and that follows the trend of going by a nickname of the given first name. Names that we have considered but that we cannot commit to or agree upon include:

Henry (nn Huck) — though Henry by itself seems so popular right now if Huck doesn’t stick and we don’t care for other nicknames for Henry such as Hank.
Ezekiel (nn Zeke) which my husband says sounds too biblical compared to our first two.
Archer (nn Archie) — perhaps too popular now with the royal family association?
Jack
We also considered Theodore (Theo) until this baby’s grandma chose that name for her cat.
Sullivan (Sully) — though we like the nickname Sully, Sullivan seems to break the mold of the more traditional sounding names of the first two.
Sidney (Sid) which my husband doesn’t care for as a boy’s name.

Other family names we could consider as middle names but probably not as a first name unless we came up with an unconventional nick name would include:
Thomas
Robert

Thank you for your help!

Jenny B

I am interested to see if commenters will have good fresh nickname options for Thomas/Robert. I have heard of Robin as a nickname for Robert; and there’s Bertie, which is starting to sound cute again. My kids go to school with a boy nicknamed Robbie, which felt at least a little fresh to me.

I’ve been noticing a little uptick in the use of old-fashioned nicknames such as Johnny and Jimmy and Timmy and Eddie, and I wonder if any of those would work for you. Because the trend has been for kids to go by their full names, even standard nicknames such as Bobby and Tommy are starting to sound fresh again.

I think the concern about Huck (or any nickname) not sticking is a valid one: it’s wise to make sure you’d also be happy using the given name. The name Elizabeth is so popular, the popularity of Henry seems like less of a concern in this case. One thing I particularly like about Henry is that because it ends in -y as many nicknames do, it has a sound that goes with the other two names either way: Elizabeth, August, and Henry; Lizzy, Gus, and Henry.

Ezekiel does feel biblical (and much more distinctly biblical than Elizabeth, even though Elizabeth is also a biblical name); but biblical names have become so mainstream, I think it isn’t too jarring. And I think Gus and Zeke are terrific together. It does bother me a little how much the names Elizabeth and Ezekiel overlap in letters/sound/emphasis. But Lizzie, Gus, and Zeke is fabulous.

It’s hard to predict the effect of the royal family on the name Archer. I remember with previous royal babies Charlotte and George, there was a shying-away from those names: we got many letters saying “Oh no, we’d decided on Charlotte/George, but now we can’t use them!” Elizabeth, August, and Archer; Lizzie, Gus, and Archie. That’s pretty great!

I can’t tell from the letter if you want to stick to family names again this time. If not, I’ll mention a few others that came to mind.

I think Cal would go very nicely in this group. Elizabeth, August, and Calvin; Lizzie, Gus, and Cal. Or same grouping, but nickname Vinny.

Or Wes. Elizabeth, August, and Wesley. Lizzie, Gus, and Wes.

Or Ned. Elizabeth, August, and Edward; Lizzie, Gus, and Ned. Oh, or same grouping, but nickname Ted/Teddy. I like that! Lizzie, Gus, and Teddy.

Or Freddie. Elizabeth, August, and Frederick; Lizzie, Gus, and Freddie.

Or Frankie. Elizabeth, August, and Franklin; Lizzy, Gus, and Frankie.

If you continue to struggle, I suggest dropping some of your preferences. After only two children, no pattern is so established that you should feel forced to continue it. If this time there is no good nickname, or the nickname comes from initials instead of from the first name, or the name is less traditional or the nickname is less punchy—all of those things are fine, and not startling or unusual.

[My last day of work was one week ago yesterday, when we were thinking “I wonder if the library might even CLOSE because of this!” Reshelving library books is not a job I can do from home, so I have some time on my hands. Those of you in a similar boat, I suggest we use some of that time to name some sweet little babies.]

Dear Swistle,

Our surname is pronounced like “pain” though it is spelled differently. This has made choosing a name difficult! I’m wondering how you navigate situations where the surname has meaning and in our case, not a pleasant meaning?!

We are expecting a boy early summer to join two boy siblings. We’ve used up our list of boy names: Aaron and Charles (nn Charlie) and are in need of help with this third one (and likely final).

An example of the issue we’re running into is that some names simply are off the table because of their meaning: Miles, Grant, Will (if went by that nn for William), and others because of combo / initials in general: Peter (and anything starting with a P or T).

I tend to fret perhaps more than warranted about this issue. For example, after naming Charlie I realized someone could make the connection that a Charlie horse causes pain which could be a source of teasing. Friends tell me that is far-fetched. My husband said he has heard every variation of teasing with the surname growing up and it doesn’t matter what the first name is-they will be teased. He said he was called a pain, painful, even window pane??

We intentionally named our boys with multi-syllable names that likely wouldn’t be shortened to single syllable nick names with a softer initial sound also to lessen the severity of the sound of our surname which is compounded by the severity of its meaning.

Are there other / different things we should keep in mind?

In terms of names to consider, our list is painfully short (pun intended):). While it’s super popular now, I love James but it does have a different ring than a multi-syllable name and almost rhymes (my husband is against it). Other favorites of mine include Henry, Harry (has the issue with both Harry and “Pain” having meaning and could be a huge source of teasing!), and my husband’s hands-down favorite, Benjamin (over time would probably be shortened to Ben which then is one-syllable and has a similar ending as the surname, and Ben also meshes weirdly with the beginning of our surname, in my opinion).

I’m also wanting to be sensitive to sibling names not sounding too similar, so an -ie or -y ending might be off limits because of Charlie?

I, especially, like classic names, and dislike super trendy names, even if classic. For example, Theodore, Sebastian, etc are off the table as there are a bunch of them where we live. My husband likes classic names that are a little more common than I do, but we both want names that could generally be spelled by someone over the phone (though this is an interesting criteria now as so many variations in spelling have become popular that even my husband’s common name of Brian has been misspelled more often than not, recently).

Other names we are potentially considering include Joseph (though it’s my brother’s name and probably would be shortened over time to Joe), Wesley (though kinda popular, rhymes with Charlie, and may be shortened over time to Wes which in addition to being monosyllabic, bleeds weirdly into the surname, in my opinion), Roland (issue with ending of D sound going into P of surname, and again could sound like “rolling pain” which wouldn’t be good!!).

If we were having a girl, names we’d consider include Lydia, Valentine, Josephine, Caroline, Louise, Meredith.

We plead for help with this “painful” issue!!

Many thanks,
Michelle

Let us start with a suggestion that will not work in this particular situation—but we do these posts in part to help others in similar situations. The suggestion is this: use the other parent’s surname. The infrequent usage of that option is as amazing to me as that we have had 45 male presidents and male vice-presidents in a row. I went to school with a girl whose surname was Dick, and a boy whose surname was Butt. We don’t have to live this way when we have another equally valid surname to use.

Well. In cases where the family surname has already been chosen and it is a surname with a negative meaning, I think you are exactly on the right track: carefully test out first names and their nicknames/initials, and try to pick the least teasable options. Your husband is certainly right that the surname will result in a certain level of teasing no matter what, but he’s wrong that therefore it doesn’t matter what the first name is: there’s no need to add MORE teasing to the situation. But I also agree with your friends that Charlie to charlie horse to charlie horses causing pain is too big of a stretch to worry about. It’s hard to imagine the taunt: “Ha ha, I have a CHARLIE HORSE! Which hurts—or, as you might say, CAUSES PAIN! Nyah nyah, Charlie (Horse Causes) Pain!” No self-respecting bully would try to make that fly.

I think Henry would be great. Henry Pain sounds excellent and doesn’t increase the tease factor; Aaron, Charlie, and Henry is a great set of brothers. Having a similar-sounding ending to Charlie seems like a non-issue. I say do it and be done with it!

I think Benjamin Pain is good too, and that Aaron, Charlie, and Ben makes a great set of siblings (except it makes me want to put them in ABC order). I agree with you that Ben Pain is not ideal, but I don’t think it’s at a dealbreaking level: it’s just slightly odd, and with nicknames I feel like the flow doesn’t matter so much.

I like Joseph, too, and I think Joe Pain sounds kind of cool.

“Rolling pain” is not a thing, and Roland/rolling sound pretty different anyway, so I don’t think that’s an issue with Roland. (I wondered if you might instead be thinking of the similarity to rolling pin, but I’d say Roland Pain doesn’t sound enough like rolling pin for that to be an issue either—even if rolling pins were a negative thing.) I do have a little bit of trouble going from the -d to the P-, but not enough trouble to rule the name out. I would pretty quickly just get used to putting a tiny pause in there: Roland.Pain.

I really think Henry is the answer, but let’s see if we can find some more candidates to consider.

Elliot Pain; Aaron, Charlie, and Elliot
Ethan Pain; Aaron, Charlie, and Ethan
George Pain; Aaron, Charlie, and George
Jared Pain; Aaron, Charlie, and Jared
Joshua Pain, Josh Pain; Aaron, Charles, and Joshua; Aaron, Charlie, and Josh
Luke Pain; Aaron, Charlie, and Luke
Nathan Pain, Nate Pain; Aaron, Charles, and Nathan; Aaron, Charlie, and Nate
Nicholas Pain, Nick Pain; Aaron, Charles, and Nicholas; Aaron, Charlie, and Nick
Nolan Pain; Aaron, Charlie, and Nolan
Seth Pain; Aaron, Charlie, and Seth
Thomas Pain, Tom Pain; Aaron, Charles, and Thomas; Aaron, Charlie, and Tom (starts with T.)

(HENRY.)

Update on Baby Girl Berryhill, Sister to Eleanor Blue

[It is going to take time to adjust to all these new ways of being. I am handling it in part by working on a backlog of baby name questions.]

Hello,

I am pregnant with our second baby girl and we are having trouble finding a name for her. The baby is due June 21st. Our daughters name is Blakely Glenn Pulley and she is 3. The top runner right now for baby number two is Nora. I just want to make sure that Nora goes well with Blakely. I don’t want to name our next baby with a “B” name because we already have Blakely and then our German shepherds name is Bodhi, so I would like to stay away from “B’s”. The other names we having been considering, but aren’t crazy about are:

Sawyer
Landen
Payton
Pearl
Nora
Emery
Paisley
Palmer
Phoenix
Annabelle
Ashlyn
Finley

Any suggestions are more then welcome because we are definitely struggling!

The two middle names I was thinking for Nora would be:

Nora Jean
Or Nora Sue ( Sue for my aunt that recently just passed away)

But any other suggestions for middle names are more then welcome as well!

Please let me know your thoughts! We are excited to hear your suggestions!!

All the best,

Nathan and Lisa Pulley

Whether two names go together is a fairly subjective area, but I can at least give you my own opinion, and then commenters can give theirs. In my opinion, the names Blakely and Nora are a style clash.

The name Blakely is a contemporary surname name. Like many surname names it has a unisex sound, though in the U.S. it is currently used almost exclusively for girls (1,304 new baby girls and 10 new baby boys in 2018, according to the Social Security Administration). It is not yet very common in the U.S. (#250 in 2018), but it is rising fairly briskly: it first appeared in the Top 1000 in 2011 at #928. I would expect a girl named Blakely to have sisters with names like Ellery, Campbell, and Lennox.

The name Nora is a vintage revival, feminine and classic/traditional in sound. It’s a standalone name but also a nickname for Eleanor, which makes it a little difficult to figure out how common it is—but as a standalone name, it was #30 in 2018 (the name Eleanor was #32). It has drifted in and out of popularity, from a low of #501 in 2000 to a high of #28 in 2017, but it has been in the Top 1000 names since the searchable online records begin in 1900. I would expect a girl named Nora to have sisters with names like Evelyn, Violet, and Clara.

Looking at your list of finalists, I see at least two distinct style preferences. One is for names similar to Blakely: Sawyer, Landen, Payton, Emery, Paisley, Palmer, Finley. One is for names similar to Nora: Pearl, Annabelle. (Ashlyn and Phoenix strike me as outliers.)

There is no rule that sibling names must be the same style, and there are arguments to be made for choosing your favorite name each time without regard for style. But my own personal preference is to coordinate style, or at least to avoid startling clashes. If I were you, I would look for names more like the ones on your list that are similar in style to Blakely.

Of those names from your list, my favorite is Emery. Emery Pulley; Blakely and Emery. I like it with either of the middle names you mention: Emery Sue Pulley, Emery Jean Pulley.

A general tip before we continue is to make sure you’re trying each first/last combination without the middle name. Saying, for example, “Paisley Jean Pulley” can disguise that Paisley Pulley matches both starting and ending sounds (P-/-ley).

More names similar in style to Blakely:

Carson Pulley; Blakely and Carson
Darcy Pulley; Blakely and Darcy
Delaney Pulley; Blakely and Delaney
Devany Pulley; Blakely and Devany
Ellery Pulley (maybe too much L and Y); Blakely and Ellery
Ellison Pulley; Blakely and Ellison
Everly Pulley (repeats ending of Blakely/Pulley); Blakely and Everly
Gracen Pulley; Blakely and Gracen
Hadley Pulley (repeats ending of Blakely/Pulley); Blakely and Hadley
Harlow Pulley; Blakely and Harlow
Hayden Pulley; Blakely and Hayden
Keaton Pulley; Blakely and Keaton
Keelyn Pulley; Blakely and Keelyn
Kellen Pulley; Blakely and Kellen
Kerrigan Pulley; Blakely and Kerrigan
Lennox Pulley; Blakely and Lennox
Madigan Pulley; Blakely and Madigan
Padgett Pulley; Blakely and Padgett
Quinn Pulley; Blakely and Quinn
Sloane Pulley; Blakely and Sloane
Teagan Pulley; Blakely and Teagan

Update on Baby Girl Carrot-with-an-M, Sister to Avila and Rose

Dear Swistle,

My husband and I are excitedly expecting baby #2 this spring – a second boy! We need some help and appreciate any you can offer at this point! Our last name is Norris with an M.

Our first son is named August, but he goes exclusively by Augie at this point in his life. We love his name for so many reasons – it’s not completely unknown, but also not common in our area, it’s a strong name with a soft nickname that fits his personality so well, it starts with a vowel (my personal preference), and best of all, we found out after he was born that my grandpa’s father, grandfather, and great-grandfather had all been named August. I could go on and on about why I love his name so much. Unfortunately, loving his name so much is making naming this second baby seem like a particularly difficult challenge! We’ve talked and talked about options and whether we need to continue talking about options comes down to one question – is Marvin a usable name on a baby born in 2020?

My grandpa was named Marvin and he was hugely important in my life. My husband was also very close to him. I don’t adore the name, but I would love thinking about him when I talked about my son’s name and I would love to honor my grandpa this way. If he were named Marvin, we would also use my grandpa’s middle name, which was Henry.

I know names from the same era as Marvin are becoming popular again, but for some reason Marvin feels outside of that trend and like it may never truly be “usable” again. I don’t need a name to be trendy – in fact I’d prefer it not be – but I also don’t want it to be a name people intensely dislike or don’t “get.” Vinny isn’t an option as a nickname because it’s my stepbrother’s name (unrelated to my grandpa).

So. Would you use a name you feel a little iffy about as a name in theory but love in use because it reminds you of someone you love? Would you stick it in the middle name spot instead? Can you picture a baby named Marvin without wondering what in the world his parents were thinking or cringing or laughing out loud?

If you wouldn’t use Marvin, what else might you suggest based on our small list of names we’ve come up with? We’re struggling! If we don’t use Marvin as a first name, it would be the middle name. Other options we’ve considered:

– Elliott
– Henry
– Arthur (very close friends told us recently that they intend to use this name on a future child and were adamant we not use it even though they aren’t expecting – an issue for a whole other post!)
– Sterling (husband doesn’t like)
– Everest (husband doesn’t like, although he loves Everett)
– Everett (not usable for me because it is closely associated with my father’s family and I don’t want that association – otherwise a lovely name)
– Ezra (husband loves, I don’t)

To get a better sense of our style, if we ever have a girl, our top contenders would likely be Aurelia, Anastasia, Elena, and Violet (Lettie).

Thanks so much for your consideration!

Marvin is the kind of name I can picture completely reversing my feelings on, the way I did with Henry and Charlotte: both names seemed UNUSABLE to me until they suddenly, abruptly, magically became usable, through some process of name fashion that has been very instructive for considering future naming trends. I would not cringe or laugh if I encountered a baby Marvin, but I would be surprised and interested; I would assume it was a family name. But I’m remembering when I encountered a baby Ruth, and I was not only surprised and interested but AN IMMEDIATE CONVERT.

It’s too bad Vinny isn’t a nickname option, because Vinny is another example of a name I would have thought was currently unusable, but then I encountered one in the wild and it completely changed my mind. Also, Marvin/Vinny is a nice fit with August/Augie; “Augie and Marvin” doesn’t click into place quite as well.

Hm. Hm. Let’s talk this through a little more. The ending of Marvin reminds me of Evan and Calvin. The beginning of Marvin is more the issue, I THINK. But on the other hand, Mark and Marcus. Hm. Is it the “arv” sound? I am personally a huge fan of the name Harvey, but I recognize it’s a little…vintage for a lot of people. But Harvard and Marvel seem to be rocking it. Hm.

Well. I can picture Marvin being charming in the same way I find Harvey charming. But I also feel we are Not Quite There Yet. On the other hand, I am so extremely on-board with honor names. And “It’s after my grandfather!” is such an easy and charming explanation. Hm.

I am not sure if the alliterative surname improves the situation or makes it less advisable. I am also not sure if the similarity to the name of the singer Maren Morris is helpful or harmful or irrelevant. (I had thought when I began the sentence that her name was spelled Marin, which is much more visually similar than Maren.)

I guess if it were me I would with some regret come down on the side of using it as a middle name, but I would be supportive and impressed by the use of it as a first name. I think what I would do is reverse the name: Henry Marvin instead of Marvin Henry. August and Henry works beautifully, as does Augie and Henry.

Dearest Swistle,

I’m not currently expecting (hopefully soon!) but I’d love to get your input on a conundrum I have. I have a single syllable last name, but almost all of my favorite baby names are also single syllable, such as Gwen, Faye, Tess, Wren, Lynn, June, Joan, or Reese for girls and Cole, Joel, Wade, Roy, Neil, or Rhys for boys. I know single syllable names *can* work fine together but it definitely doesn’t always work and I’m wondering if you have any insight into what makes short names sound good together or not. (For reference, my surname sounds like Hung-with-a-Y, but I’d also be interested in a more general discussion).

Thanks!
– Emily

For me, the only thing that works is trying each one on a case-by-case basis. Sometimes I prime the pump by saying a few 1/1 names I know work: James Dean and Anne Rice and Brad Pitt and so on.

But this made me wonder if others have found any rules of thumb to figure out which names work and which don’t.