Swistle! I’ve been following your blog for so. many. years, through numerous fertility issues, through a breakup, though years of not even trying to conceive and through a miscarriage that I never thought I’d actually need anyone’s advice because during all this time, I was honing all my name nerdiness by reading your blog and and following name trends and data. But now that I am preparing to name an actual real life human I desperately need your help. This is serious business!

My partner and I are over the moon that we are expecting our first (and probably only), baby due in April, gender unknown. I would like to have a few solid names for each gender so we can say them out loud to this little one before making the final decision. We have finally decided on a last and middle name. This took months of discussion and thought, as we do not share a last name. We decided to use my last name for this baby’s last (sounds like O’Burn), and his mother’s maiden name as this baby’s middle (Row, spelled differently). I am so happy about this! So much woman power in this babe’s name!

For girls, our top contenders are:
Ramona
Marigold “Goldie”
Loretta

I love this every name on this list. There are a few issues with these names, however. His favorite is Ramona, but it was also the name of my lovely cat, who died 5 years ago. It just feels like my cat’s name.
I love Goldie, and would probably call her this exclusively with Marigold as a backup but the issue with this name is that all but 2 of our 7 nieces all have an -ie or a -y ending to their names and this bothers me a little because: 1. Goldie so rhyme-y with of their names and 2. All these names sound a bit diminutive. He is lukewarm on Loretta.

For boys, our top contenders are:
Remy
Hayes
Eero

I don’t love this list like the girl list. The issues with these seem like dealbreakers: I’m afraid that Remy (partner’s favorite) and Hayes are too trendy, and that while Remy/Remi/Remington is unisex, it’s leaning more heavily toward the girl’s side, especially with all the alternate spellings (is this a problem? I can’t decide). The -y ending doesn’t bother me on a boy for some reason.
Then there is Eero. I LOVE it so much, he’s unsure. I’ve love Arrow too, but prefer Eero (it’s not a weapon, doesn’t feel trendy, and the Saarinen reference is a pleasing one). The issues here are: 1. Spelling/ pronouncing issues, which I think won’t bother me so much (as there are more common names like Aaron, Madelyne, Louis where pronunciation and spelling can be up for interpretation/confusion), but I don’t want to saddle the babe with a lifetime of irritation over this. 2. Eero Row is repetitive. Initially this bothered me but my partner likes them together, however, he’s not in love like I am with Eero.
Are their other boy names that are just as cool and uncommon but with less issues? I know that the perfect name doesn’t exist, but can you and your readers help give your opinions on these issues/recommend other boy names?

Other names I like but can’t/ won’t use:
Cleo
Sunny
Vita
Zola
Clark
Frederick/Freddie
Soren
Teddy

Other names he likes:
Archer
Arlo
Hugh/Hugo
Jude
Oliver

Thank you so much for any advice and I promise to send an update (those are my favorite)!

Best,
Melissa and Niko

My first impulse was to push you to like Arlo: it’s a great name, and it has almost all the upsides of Eero without any of the downsides. My main hesitation is that I don’t like the -o ending with the O- surname; I don’t like it with Eero, either. Arlo O’Burn. Eero O’Burn. Combined with the -ro/Row issue of first and middle, Eero Row O’Burn would be completely out for me: my mouth and ear can’t make heads or tails of it. Arlo Row O’Burn has a similar set of difficult sound combinations. I don’t like to say them or hear them. I realize this sort of thing is highly subjective, however, and that someone else might love the repeating sounds.

Hayes feels contemporary to me, and it’s part of the surname-name trend, but I don’t know if I would call it trendy or not. It feels pleasingly old-fashioned, too—like, I would not be surprised at all to encounter an elderly gentleman named Hayes, whereas I would be surprised to encounter an elderly gentleman named Cayden. It does blend into the surname, but I think you’d just get used to putting a little pause there.

Let’s look at the current usage of Remy. This is from the Social Security Administration for babies born in 2017 (the 2018 data will be available in May):

Remy: 497 F, 678 M
Remi: 1262 F, 186 M
Remmy: 20 F, 60 M
Remmi: 50 F, 5 M
Remington: 754 F, 1497 M
Remmington: 27 F, 20 M

I don’t know what I’d advise. I was not expecting the numbers to look like that: I don’t know anyone named Remy/Remi, so I had very little to go on, but for some reason I was expecting to see it less unisex than that, with heavier usage for boys. Usage of Remy and Remington is rising for both boys and girls; this may be a name like Avery or Riley or Cameron, where we will expect it for either sex.

I’d love to find some names without so many overlaps in sound: Row O’Burn already has the repeating long-O and the repeating R; Remy adds a third R, Eero adds a third R and a third long-O.

Calvin
Davis
Dawson
Emmett
Felix
Gage
Lawson
Malcolm
Thompson
Wesley
Zane

An option that doesn’t avoid repeating sounds is Harvey. I love it so much. Harvey O’Burn. Harvey Row O’Burn.

Another pet favorite of mine that repeats a sound: Alfred. Alfred O’Burn. Alfred Row O’Burn.

Or I think Alistair is nice. Alistair O’Burn. Alistair Row O’Burn.

Or Merrit. Merrit O’Burn. Merrit Row O’Burn.

Here’s one that leans into the sound repetition but with some nice strong consonant sounds to give it structure: Gibson. Gibson O’Burn. Gibson Row O’Burn.

Or Franklin. Franklin O’Burn. Franklin Row O’Burn.

Turning to girl names. Ramona is again a lot of repeating sounds: Ramona Row O’Burn; three Rs, three long-Os. It is too much for me, but I’ll say again that I know such things are very subjective, and it would not surprise me to hear that the overlapping sounds were a delight to someone else’s ear. It does seem to me like much less of an issue than with Eero Row O’Burn, I think because the name Ramona is very familiar and also because it has some nice strong consonant sounds to help break up the Rs and Os.

My top favorite from your list is Marigold. Three Rs and three Os again, but the O sound is not obvious, and it helps that the R is not the first initial. Also, again we have some nice strong consonants to break things up. Goldie is adorable, and I don’t care two figs about the cousin names ending in -ie. The diminutive nature of the nickname is another story. I will say that Goldie does not have the lightweight/silly sound that draws my attention to a diminutive ending, and for me that makes a big difference. It also makes a big difference to me that it’s the nickname and not the given name.

The girl names on your list make me think of:

Agatha
Celeste
Cordelia/Delia
Esther
Florence/Flora
Frances/Frankie
Gloria
Harriet
Hazel (similar to Hayes)
Henrietta/Hennie/Etta
Imogen/Midge
Ivy
Louisa
Louise
Mabel
Magnolia/Nola
Margaret/Greta
Marilla
Matilda
Sabrina
Theodora
Winifred/Winnie/Freddie

Name update:

Thank you, Swistle, for posting my question, and thank you to all the commenters for all their thoughtful responses. I immediately added Swistle’s suggestion of Imogen/Midge (love!) to our girl list, and a reader’s suggestion of Desmond/Desi/Dez to our boy list. Then, a bit reluctantly, I let go of Eero, as the overwhelming response from your readers was that this name would not only cause confusion over pronunciation/spelling, but also it doesn’t sound pleasing with the last name. Thank you for talking me down from that ledge. Eero will always be a name I love but sadly will never use.

Well, our little boy was born on April 17th and it took us 5 days to decide on his name. To my surprise, none of the names we considered during these 5 days were the names I wrote to you about! We finally decided on Quincy Row O’Burn. I stumbled upon Quincy while researching Desmond (thank you to the reader who suggested this!), and I love love love it. It’s so fun to tell people his name — we’ve gotten such positive responses to it — some people even sing his name back to us. We love it. It’s perfect. Also, I really appreciate the ease with which people recognize and appreciate his name, which wouldn’t have happened with a name like Eero.

Thank you!
Melissa, Niko and Quincy

Hi! I’ve looked through your blog while naming my other children and it really helped but this time we are stuck. Our last name sounds like weigh with a B. We have 2 boys, Elijah Reid who is 5, almost 6 and Ezra Lucas who is 3. We are stumped with our 3rd boy. He’s also our last child most likely. We are torn between sticking with an E name which a lot of people say we should do. My husband doesn’t want to and I’m not sure what to do. Names I currently like are Everett, Emory, Ethan. My husband is partial to Oliver. Non E names that I like are Owen and Oliver. We have waited until the last minute as we have a scheduled c section on February 7th. Please help us by offering some suggestions!

Thank you!!

I suggest Isaac. It has the same hip biblical sound as Elijah and Ezra, and fits in well without adding another E name with an -a/-ah ending. It also gives you another vowel name, if it’s intentional rather than coincidental that all the names you’re considering start with vowels.

Or Malachi. Elijah, Ezra, and Malachi.

Or Gideon. Elijah, Ezra, and Gideon.

Or Noah. Elijah, Ezra, and Noah.

Or Cyrus. Elijah, Ezra, and Cyrus.

I don’t think you should feel any pressure for the third child to have an E- name. Other people may be pressuring you, but none of them are likely to deep-down long-term care about this. But if finding a third E- name would be fun rather than stressful/pressurey, we could look at those. The main issue, I think, is finding an E- name that doesn’t clash with the biblical theme (e.g., Easton), but also isn’t too similar (e.g., Ezekiel).

There’s a minor biblical character named Ethan, but it wasn’t enough for me to have Ethan in my own mental file of Bible Names. Still, with the E-, that might be enough to make it fit.

Everett, while not biblical, has an old-fashioned sound that I think works well with Elijah and Ezra. I can picture those three as farmer brothers a long time ago. I see Emory was similarly popular a long time ago, so that might work well, too. I like how both Everett and Emory bring in a new end-sound.

I am going back and forth about Ellis. On one hand it hits that old-fashioned note; on the other hand, it seems like having an Eli- and an Elli- is a lot, especially in a sibling group with matched first initials. And I’m not fond of the way the -s ending merges with the surname.

Oh! Oh oh oh! EMMETT. Elijah, Ezra, and Emmett. I think that coordinates beautifully without being too matchy. My top two choices for you are Isaac and Emmett, with Everett and Emory close behind.

Name update:

Thank you so much for your suggestions and everyone’s comments! It was definitely not too late as we were still undecided and it took us almost 24hrs after having him to commit to a name.

I did love the suggestion of Emmett and it was on my list originally, unfortunately we live in the south and I dislike the way it would be pronounced here. I like it as Ehm-ett similar to how Emma is pronounced. But here most say Em-it with a strong southern drawl, lol. If that makes sense. We really considered Noah but wanted a consonant beginning middle name with it but nothing fit. Oliver was also considered since it was on both my husband’s and my list but once we saw him it just didn’t seem to fit for some reason. Ethan seemed to fit him perfectly and I didn’t feel weird about having 3 E names with it.

Ethan Alexander was born on 2/7 at 7:59 am via c-section. We are home and doing great. Everyone loves his name!

Dear Swistle,

My husband and I are at an impasse choosing a name for our third baby, due in June. Older siblings are Natalie Rose (middle name after my grandmother) and James Hal-with-a-T (middle name after my father-in-law). I want this daughter’s middle name to be Lucile, after my husband’s 90-year-old grandmother. Our last name is a three syllable Scandinavian name starting with J. Another note is my name starts with J and my husband’s starts with N. I’d rather avoid these initials for this third child because it feels a little too theme-y.

My husband’s favorite is Julia, which I don’t like mainly due to the first initial, but I also don’t think it works with Lucile. It’s also the name of an Italian exchange student we had (spelled Giulia) and I don’t necessarily want to name a daughter after this girl, sweet as she is. He likes Aliana (from a novel he’s read) but I don’t like that style at all. He also likes what I think of as 1990s cheerleader names: Shannon, Jenna, Jamie, Kelly, Tiffany. I’m not a fan of that style, either.

My two favorites are Sophie and Emma. I know both are popular but I think I’m ok with that. I like that Sophie and Natalie have the “ie” at the end, and it’s less popular than Emma (although if you include Sophia it’s probably more popular). We have an Emma in our social circle who is 9 but don’t know any Sophie’s. My husband has said he prefers Emma if these two options. I like the sound of both with Lucile.

Other names I like that he’s shot down are: Lyla/Lila, Sadie, Chloe, and Hannah. Olivia was a contender for Natalie, but his grandmother’s first name is actually Olive, and he doesn’t want to basically duplicate her name for this baby. I know we could use Olive as a middle name, but grandma has gone by Lucile her entire life so we would rather honor her with that.

We have nieces named Kate Lucile and Elizabeth Lucile. Other names of nieces (so we can’t repest them) are Audrey, Claire, Hallie, and Michelle/Shelly.

Thanks for your help!
JJ

I think Julia Lucile works well enough not to rule out the name, but since it also breaks the preference for a new initial AND there’s the exchange student issue, I agree it doesn’t seem like the right choice. And I am with you about Shannon/Jenna/etc.: those are going to sound fabulous on our great-grandchildren, but they need time to come around again.

I think Sophie and Emma are both nice solid choices, and good with the middle name.

I was going to suggest Amelia for its similarity to Julia, Aliana, Emma, Lila, and Olivia, but I’m not sure it’s right with Lucile. As with Julia, I don’t think it’s enough to rule out the name if you loved it. I find the slight sound/letter overlaps with the sibling names appealing. Natalie, James, and Amelia.

Or Anna: it pares down Aliana, and is similar to Jenna, Emma, and Hannah. Anna Lucile; Natalie, James, and Anna.

Or Lydia: similar to Julia and Lila and Sadie, and I think Lydia Lucile is adorable. Natalie, James, and Lydia. That’s my favorite so far.

Name update:

Thanks for all the help! My husband actually came around to Lyla on his own, and that was initially one of my favorites until he shot it down completely and my friend named the cat we gave her Lila. But we’ve decided on Lyla Lucile, and she should arrive sometime this week.

Dearest Swistle! You helped me name my first son Charlie nearly 8 (!!) years ago and I am desperately hoping you will help me again. (I’m happy to report we have never known a girl Charlie personally, or had even a boy one in the same class, although 1-2 in the same schools, and everyone loves the name and I don’t feel it is “Old Man” at all, as were my fears at the time).

I am due in April and we have known that we are having a girl since I was 13 weeks pregnant. Both of our boys were named pretty much the day after we went to the 20-week ultrasound and found out their gender. We had a great, agreed upon short list with each. I am stunned that we don’t have a name for this baby yet (and the type-A planner in me is becoming more and more stressed out). She will be our last child. Our surname is Lyman (pronounced LYE-men) and our two boys are Charles Oliver and Theodore William. They go exclusively by Charlie and Theo and we absolutely love the sib set and get complimented on the “familiar but fresh” sound all the time.

Here’s my problem: I don’t care for girls names that often go with these super traditional, familiar boys names! (For me there are three categories of these names: #1- Too-popular Top 10: Isabella, Olivia, Ella, Sophia, etc; #2- classic names that have maintained popularity: Elizabeth, Grace, Rose, etc; and #3- classic names that are regaining popularity – Eleanor, Frances, Matilda, etc.) I always pictured having a girl with a spunky, cool name, not something ultra-girly and or delicate sounding. There are two issues with this: my husband tends to dislike my general style for girls names and leans more traditional, and I love the sib set my boys have so much that I am scared to commit to a girl’s name coming out of left field in a different style that might feel jarring or surprising. Had this baby been another boy, we probably would have gone with Samuel (nn Sam). I like Sam for a girl’s nn too, but dislike Samantha AND we have a niece with the name anyway. Alexander/Alexandra was also a front runner for other pregnancies, but it’s so long! But maybe Alex for a girl is exactly what I’m looking for? However, wouldn’t anyone assume that Charlie, Theo, and Alex are all boys? Familiar but fresh, Top 50-100 seems to be our sweet spot, but I can’t seem to find a girl’s name I really love in there.

Sampling of names on my very long list that I like but can’t commit to:
Hadley
Oakley (probably too out-there or made-up sounding)
Juniper
Aspen
Kinsley
Piper
Holland (nn Hollie, though sadly I have an ex-best friend with this name which makes it most likely unusable for me)
Georgia (nn Jojo, my one traditional contender, but it’s very girly, and husband dislikes for unknown reasons!)

Names my husband likes:
Natalie (I *could* get on board with this by delivery, maybe; I was stuck on its Christmas meaning but you wrote a post on that years ago that I found and it helped)
Lauren
Harper (his one non-traditional favorite but it leans SUPER trendy to me and doesn’t have a great nickname, which we like having. He has liked it since Charlie’s pregnancy 8 years ago and I am over it.)

One final caveat is that so many names I like end in a LEE sound like Charlie’s name, who I sometimes wish was named Oliver (his middle name). I’m still a little mad at my husband for absolutely vetoing it in the first name slot. I’d make a strong push for any of the names on my list if they didn’t sound so rhyme-y with Charlie. Does the sib set Charlie, Theo, and Hadley leave Theo out in the cold?

I keep thinking there is this perfect name out there that bridges the gaps (I know this is a myth!!) and I just haven’t found it yet. But please, please pull this magic name out of your very skilled hat. ;)

Middle name will be Mae, which was my beloved Grandmother’s middle name which I also share. I looked into our family history (Swiss, German, Welsh, English) for more names and desperately wish I loved something like Emilia.

Signed,
An 80s Christine who wanted to be a Taylor and goes by Chris (husband is an 80s Anthony who goes by Tony)

Thank you!!

Here is the name that SPRANG to my mind as I was reading this, but I suspect it is EXACTLY what you mean when you say you don’t like the girl names that often go with names such as Charles and Theodore: Margaret. Charles, Theodore, and Margaret; Charlie, Theo, and…SO MANY OPTIONS I CAN HARDLY CHOOSE. Charlie, Theo, and Margo. Charlie, Theo, and Greta. Charlie, Theo, and Maisie. Charlie, Theo, and Daisy. Charlie, Theo, and Maggie. Charlie, Theo, and Meg. Oh, or Charlie, Theo, and MAE? One thing I like about the name Margaret is that while it is used exclusively for girls, it doesn’t strike me as GIRLY in the way people often mean girly: cutesy, silly, frilly. It is more of a take-charge,-get-things-done kind of name. But still cool: I can picture a Margaret with a black bob and tattoos doing roller derby.

I also seized on Georgia/Jojo from your list and I LOVE the name Georgia and wonder if we could get your husband slowly worked around to liking it. We get so many letters that start with “There’s a perfect name but my husband hates it” and then the update is “My husband changed his mind!” There is hope.

Or I wonder if you would like Josephine/Jojo. Charles, Theodore, and Josephine; Charlie, Theo, and Jojo. Theo and Jojo sound a little odd together, but I am not very picky about nickname coordination. And maybe she would end up going by Jo or Josie instead. (And a Georgia might use Georgie or George.)

But I think it’s completely fine to choose a girl name that is of a different style than Charles/Theodore. It’s fairly common for parents to have different styles for boy names and girl names.

I don’t think a Charlie, Theo, and Hadley/Kinsley/Oakley sibling group would make Theo feel left out: because of the spacing and because of the spelling, I’m not sure I would even notice that two of the three names had sound-alike endings. (I’d notice more quickly with the name Natalie, especially if it had been Charlie, Natalie, and Theo instead of Charlie, Theo, Natalie.) Plus, one of the matched endings is from a nickname, which matters less to me even when the nickname is used exclusively.

The name that leaps out at me from your list is Juniper: shares an ending  with your husband’s favorite Harper, but has a good nickname and is much less common (#314 in 2017, with Harper at #11). Charles, Theodore, and Juniper; Charlie, Theo, and Junie. I love it.

I’d love to suggest Linden or Ivy or Constance or Locklyn or Lane, but not with the surname. Maybe:

Amethyst
Astrid
Brinley
Channing
Darcy
Delaney
Ellison
Emberley
Garnet
Harriet
Meredith
Merritt
Minerva
Paisley
Rory
Teagan
Winifred

Hm, I don’t feel like I’m quite getting it.

If your husband likes more traditional names and you prefer something cooler, one common solution is to find a traditional name with a cool nickname. We did a post awhile back that had a bunch of these: Baby Girl Muh-half-fee, Sister to Beatrix (Bix). In fact, I’d suggest Beatrix/Bix for you except I’m noticing that names ending in an S-sound make a “slime” mash-up with Lyman.

Another solution is to find a more contemporary name, but with a more traditional nickname—like your Holland/Hollie idea. Some of these don’t work with the surname, but just for examples: Ellison/Ellie, Campbell/Cammie/Bella, Callister/Callie, Jensen/Jennie, Miller/Millie, Gracen/Gracie.

I wonder if the solution is to look for a prep-school-type name: traditional in one sense, modern/unisex in another sense. Something like Sloane: sleek, cool, neither delicate nor frilly. I’m not sure about Sloane with the surname or with the middle name, but perhaps we can find other options. Winslow and Simone sound similar, and Rowan, but I don’t know about Rowan with the surname. Darcy, but the middle name Mae changes the whole sound of it to something more Southern belle. Windsor. Greer or Blair or Paige, but I’m not crazy about one-syllable names with Mae, and I don’t like Greer or Blair with the surname. I may still be barking up the wrong tree, though I like Winslow and Simone from the attempt, and Simone made me think of Bianca and Fiona. Meredith. Sabrina. Jillian/Gillian. Oh, maybe Aubrey? Aubrey Mae Lyman; Charlie, Theo, and Bree.

Name update:

I am so sorry for my very belated update! We ended up with a final list of Emilia, Natalie, Hadley, and Hallie. We decided we loved Hallie best, even though it didn’t fit our criteria of a longer name with a nickname. We playfully sometimes call her Hallison. Her big brothers Charlie and Theo are absolutely smitten with her!

Thanks for all your help, Swistle and commenters!

Hi there,

We are expecting our daughter in June 2019. We would like a few options so we can finalize a name only once we meet her. Her brother’s name is Benjamin last name sounds like “rustling.” We love classic names. We didn’t find out with our son and had a few names picked for each sex. Oliver was our frontrunner but when he was born we knew it wasn’t a fit and went with Benjamin instead. I don’t want to choose a name with her and have to make a change if it doesn’t seem right.

Our favorite girls name is Jane and we had Charlotte, a family name, as a second option. Due to some family stories and the popularity, I think I like Charlotte in the middle name spot now. I like the idea of a name sounding timeless in a way that no one will hear the name and know the approximate year they were born. I seem to be stuck with the same girls names that I hear a lot of in my circle (ie Kate, Caroline) and am trying to find something fresh and maybe unexpected while keeping it non-trendy. Thank you!

It wouldn’t be quite accurate to say we are all in the same boat on the sea of name trends: there can be significant differences from community to community. But it wouldn’t be quite inaccurate, either. The names that sound fresh to to one set of parents are very likely sounding fresh to many, many other sets of parents as well—which means the freshness doesn’t last long and is a good part of the reason we can guess approximately how old a Kristen is versus approximately how old a Mackenzie is. Adding to the issue, first-time parents might not have had much contact with children, and so might use a name thinking it’s a surprising choice when it’s already much more popular than they’d prefer.

And whole TYPES of names come in at once, so that you can have a classroom with a Kylie, a Kyle, a Kayla, a Kyler, a Tyler, and a Kyra, or a soccer team with half a dozen Maddys and Addys.

Well. I think the first step is to come to terms with it as something nearly unavoidable. We are products of our time and culture, and we lean toward the same names. The upside is that our children’s names will sound good and right to their peers. Some people have names that continue to sound surprising, and I rarely envy them: I would not have wanted to be named, say, Hortense, in order to avoid the Kristen/Jennifer/Melissa/Michelle/Amy pocket of my age group; nor would I have wanted to be one of the very first Mackenzies, startling everyone now by how unexpectedly old I am.

I do think you’ve got a winning option with the name Jane. It has that fresh feel to it despite being a nice old name; it hasn’t been in the Top 100 since 1965, but it hasn’t gone completely away in the meantime. It could be that the fresh sound we’re hearing is also being heard by many other parents: I see the name is slowly climbing the ranks again, from the 400s to the 200s in the last dozen years. But it’s a slow climb, and probably encouraged by the return of names such as Emma and Charlotte.

A similar choice is Rose. It’s getting a lot of use as a middle name, but is still surprising as a first name—and the middle-name usage means it’s familiar and well-liked. I don’t think it works well with the surname, but it’s the sort of direction I’m looking in.

I suggest Margaret. It sounds similar to Charlotte and fits well with the Carolines, and there are so many good nicknames (Greta, Daisy, Maisie, Margo, Meg, Maggie).

I would love to hear more of the name Cordelia. So many parents say they’re using Charlotte because of Charlotte’s Web, I’m surprised more of us aren’t pulling Cordelia from Anne of Green Gables. And great nicknames: Cora, Corrie, Delia.

Josephine may be on its way to join Charlotte in popularity, but it’s too soon to say: it’s climbed from the 200s to the 100s in the last decade, but I’ll be interested to see where it is when the Social Security Administration releases the new statistics in May. I love it with Benjamin.

We had the name Elizabeth at the top of our list for several pregnancies, which is one reason I use it as my daughter’s pseudonym, and it has worn well as a pseudonym: I continue to like using it. We should be tripping over Elizabeths left and right: it’s been in the Top 20 since 1964, and my ear is now primed to hear it because I now associate it with one of my kids. And yet at least in our area, it’s not as common as it ought to be. I know of two Elizabeths and one Beth in my children’s schools.

I get some gentle teasing on this blog for how often I suggest Eliza, but I’m going to go right ahead and do it anyway: less common than Elizabeth but with that good timeless sound. Why isn’t it more common? It’s lovely and fresh! Eliza Charlotte!

And basically whenever I suggest Eliza I go on to suggest Eloise: the sounds are so similar, one nearly always brings the other to my mind. And then I remember Louise and Louisa, names that continue to sound fresh to me.

I am enormously charmed by the names Sally and Polly. I am eager to hear them come back.

More options:

Anna
Cecily
Clara
Claudia
Cora
Georgia
Harriet
Henrietta
June
Lydia
Minerva
Sabrina
Simone
Winifred

Name update:

We just loved so many of these names from your list and readers suggestions… Unfortunately during my pregnancy, we lost 3 grandparents, Joan, Jeanne and Edward Joseph. It felt right deciding without having met her yet. Jane, Joan and Jeanne all stem from the same name meaning: “God is gracious” and Edward Joseph lends well to one of our favorites that you suggested as a first name option, Josephine. So, our little Jane Josephine will be named for her 3 new guardians she won’t meet in this lifetime but who will hopefully watch over her.

And our darling Ben can now kiss my belly before he leaves for school and say, “I love you Jane!”

Erin

Hello!

Our second daughter is due in April and we’re having trouble with names. Our first girl, Eva Grace, didn’t have a name until she was born, and I’d rather not repeat that! I’d really like another name that contains a “v” or starts with “E” and my favorite is Violet; my husband isn’t sold. We’ve also tossed around Eden, but it sounds a little strange with our last name. I prefer classic, feminine names—nothing too dated or androgynous. Any suggestions for us?

Thanks in advance (and happy new year!),
Adria Dillon

Some names that include a V:

Ivy
Maeve
Minerva
Olive
Olivia
Savannah
Silvia/Sylvia
Silvie/Sylvie
Vanessa
Vera
Veronica
Victoria
Vivian/Vivienne (a little rhymey with the surname)

Some names that start with E:

Edie
Eleanor
Elena
Eliza
Elodie
Eloise
Elsa
Elsbeth/Elspeth
Emeline
Esme
Estelle
Esther

I left some names on the list even though they might be too similar to Eva, because you’re looking for some similarity and I’m not sure how similar you’d like to go. If you wanted Very Similar, Eva and Ivy would give you that: both three letters, both two syllables, both with a V in the middle surrounded by two vowels. It’s interesting how much differentness the names retain, considering all their similarities: pairings such as Eva and Elena or Eva and Olivia are in some ways more similar than Eva and Ivy, despite their different syllable/letter counts.

One thing I like about Eva and Eliza is that they both get an interesting letter in their names: V for Eva and Z for Eliza. But the matching E___a may be too similar.

For a middle name, I love the idea of finding something that goes nicely with Grace. I don’t think there’s any reason middle names NEED to coordinate, but sometimes it’s fun. With Grace, I like pleasingly familiar virtue names such as Faith, Hope, and Joy; and also pleasingly short sweet vintage names such as Jane, Jean, Kay, May, and Rose. Eva Grace and Ivy Joy. Eva Grace and Eliza Rose. Eva Grace and Eloise Jane. Eva Grace and Esther May. Eva Grace and Sylvia Hope.

Name update:

Thanks to everyone for the wonderful suggestions! My husband finally came around…Violet Anne is nearly 3 months old now! Her sister continues to be less than impressed. :)

Hello Swistle!

It’s been 8 years since I last wrote to you, but we are (finally) expecting again! Here’s the post about my daughter, who is almost 8 and the joy of my life:

https://www.swistle.com/babynames/2010/11/21/baby-naming-issue-someone-else-has-the-same-name/

I can’t tell you how helpful you and the commenters were. I treasure those words.

We are currently expecting another baby, sex unknown, due in late February, and feeling very ambivalent about names. Maybe because we struggled for so long (5+ years of infertility, less than 1% chance of having children on our own) or because I’m subconsciously trying to protect myself, or in denial about finally being pregnant, I just don’t seem to be able to get excited about naming. We aren’t finding out the sex, because after lots of medical intervention (IVF), control, and knowing all the stats and info about my reproductive abilities, I just wanted to give this baby some privacy and let there be a tiny bit of mystery about this pregnancy. I mean, we have photos of it when it’s literally a blastocyst. I want to have a delivery room surprise, and although my husband and daughter want to find out the sex, we haven’t so far.

Our last name sounds like “Mark-word”. Our older daughter, as noted in link above, is named Amel!@ M0rn!ng. Sometimes we call her M!illy. Here’s our short list:

For a boy, Jake, after my dad (who paid for our IVF cycle, and has 3 daughters, bless him). I like that it’s not complicated, given our long last name. Not sure if he would have a middle name, as my dad does not. We are considering Heywood (another honor name) as the middle name, but “Jake Heywood” seems borderline too cowboy, even for living in the midwest as we do. We’re pretty much decided on the first name but open to feedback on that, and the middle name situation.

For a girl, a short list:
Sylvia (husband doesn’t love, but I have liked it for years. I like that we would have 2 A initials – me and my older daughter – and 2 S initials – the baby and my husband)
Eleanor (classic, and an honor name, but not inspiring me)
Olympia (rad, but is it too much? I like the -ia suffix with Amelia, feels tidy)
Harriet (or Harriett)

middle name contenders (all honor names): Summer, Louise, Molly

I am open to thoughts on these names, or new ideas. I don’t care for gender neutral names like Harper, Parker, etc (although, as a teacher, know many lovely children with these names – just not my personal taste).

Also, I’ve been dreaming about names for years and now that I get my chance I’m not that into it! What on earth? Has anyone else had this situation?

Thank you for you excellent work! And good luck with your move.

Anna

My absolute favorite option would be for you to repeat what you did with your first child’s name: a relatively familiar first name, and then a surprising middle name. I don’t feel strongly about it if the baby is a boy, but I feel fairly strongly about it if the baby is a girl.

I think Jake Heywood Markword is great for a boy: a little tongue-tangling to say the whole thing (the repeating D and K and W sounds, and the similarity of -word/-wood), but you’d hardly ever say the whole name, and I think honor names are well worth it—particularly if you’re considering an alternative of not giving him a middle name at all. It doesn’t seem too cowboy to me—just enough to give it that smack of rugged coolness.

For a girl, I’d want to look for something approximately as familiar as Amelia: it doesn’t have to be Top Ten, but I’d look for something with that same feeling. Eleanor would be perfect if you loved it more. Sylvia seems good too, though it is quite a bit less common than Amelia; it helps that it is a familiar name even though it is not currently in high usage. Harriet is a name I like very much, but for some reason not with this particular sister name and surname. Olympia is indeed rad, but soooo much less common/familiar: it’s not even in the Top 1000. For comparison, in 2018 there were 11,800 new baby girls named Amelia, and only 62 new baby girls named Olympia. It isn’t that sibling names must coordinate in popularity or style, but from Amelia to Olympia is a startling leap. Still, the matching rhythms and matching -ia endings do help bring them together.

Hm, I seem to be demolishing your list. No, wait: I am in favor of both Eleanor and Sylvia. I particularly like Sylvia if we can bring your husband around to it, since you like it much more than you like the name Eleanor, and you like the A and S initial pairings and the matched -ia endings. Another name that would fit these preferences is Sophia. Amelia and Sophia. More candidates that have either S- or -ia and seem to me that they’d work well in familiarity/style:

Julia
Lydia
Olivia
Sabrina
Sadie
Stella

More candidates:

Charlotte (not sure about repeating -ar- sound with surname)
Clara
Clarissa
Cora
Elise
Evelyn
Grace
Jane
Josephine
Lillian (potential for Milly and Lily)
Lucy
Natalie
Noelle
Nora
Rose
Victoria

But then! How oh how will you ever repeat the triumph that is Amelia’s middle name? I remember when you sent that update, how the middle name was such a pleasing surprise! Do you think it’s repeatable? How did you come up with M0rn!ng, and can you go back and do the same thing again? And I am very much looking forward to the comments section on this one. Let’s experiment a little in the meantime:

Charlotte Liberty
Cora Sunrise
Eleanor Spring
Evelyn Story
Jane Olympia
Josephine Marigold
Julia Clover
Lillian Valentine
Lydia Wish
Natalie Magic
Nora Sunshine
Olivia Brighten
Sabrina Glory
Sadie Amethyst
Sophia Hyacinth
Sylvia Clarity
Victoria Starling

I do think Summer would work, too. It is not as surprising as M0rn!ng, but it is a pleasingly similar word name. Perhaps if the first name ends up being quite a bit less common than the name Amelia, the more-familiar middle name Summer would help balance things; plus, I do love honor names. Ooo, maybe something like Amel!@ M0rn!ng and Sylvia Summer, or Amel!@ M0rn!ng and Sabrina Summer.

Update:

Hi again!

First of all, thank you a million for answering my question, and thank you to all the sweet, sweet commenters. It has helped SO MUCH getting all the positive feedback.

I had to email you back and tell you how we came up with our older daughter’s middle name, because I think it changes the trajectory of the naming process (ok, maybe that’s an overstatement. But it will help clarify I think). M0rn!ng is actually my husband’s great-grandmother’s name. She died when he was a young adult, and they were quite close. So when his dad, Amel!@’s grandfather, was a little toddler, they all lived together, and when he woke up every morning he would stand at the top of the stairs and yell “Morning!” (as in, good morning) because he couldn’t get down the stairs by himself in his footie pajamas, and she was always the one who would come carry him down. So he thought her name was morning, because every time he called, there she was. My husband didn’t realize that wasn’t her actual name til he was like 18 or something!

SO. Morning is an honor/family name (which, as you can see, we are big on – my husband and I both have honor names ourselves). Our Amel!@ M0rn!ng was actually born at 5:26 pm :) I don’t think I would have used such a…”free spirited” name, but the fact that it’s a family name and feels balanced with the more traditional first name makes it feel right. I’m actually loving the comments on the recent post, as I feel like we’ve tapped into a very specific naming niche.

Anyways. Thanks again. You are the best!

Anna

Name update:

Hi Swistle!
Here’s Amel!@ M0rn!ng with her new sister, Sylvia Summer!

We picked Sylvia because we loved it and thought it went well with all of our names, and Summer is the middle name of my best friend since second grade, who attended Sylvia’s birth as my doula and has just been all around amazing support during our infertility journey (and before). Thank you all for your thoughts and ideas!!
Lots of love, Anna

Hello and help please! We are expecting our third (and final) little boy and are stuck. I like names that sound traditional, but have a modern-ish twist. Husband likes names that are traditional, period. For naming our first two boys one of us picked the first name and then the other the middle name, with the blessing and input of the other spouse of course. We switched off for the second kiddo so we each have picked a first and middle name at this point. Big brothers for baby are Anderson Edward and Thomas Huntley.

All of the names we have picked so far have had at least some minor family significance. The only other family name we haven’t used yet that might be in the running for a middle name is Miller, but we typically shy away from names ending in ‘-er’ given our last name so we don’t really have the family ties angle to guide us this time. For the first kiddo, Archer was a strong contender but we decided the double –er endings were too much.

My leading names currently are Bennett and Beckett. In general I like names that have an easy shortening for a nick name. Husband prefers Bennett over Beckett but thinks both are not traditional enough and is concerned that Bennett would always be telling people how to spell his name (2 n’s, 2 t’). Of the more traditional names that we have discussed Henry, Jack, and Peter top my list, though Henry is the only true contender. We know too many Jacks and Jacksons and Peter Pricer makes me think of “Peter Piper picked a peck…”

My husband’s all time favorite name EVER is Victor. It is his grandfather’s and uncle’s name. Unfortunately, I absolutely cannot stand it for reasons I won’t go into and have used my veto power on it every time. We did make a deal that if we had a girl Victoria would be in the running, but it seems we are going to be a boys-only club. Recent names my husband has been talking about include Isaac, William, and Nathaniel. None of them really feel right to me though.

Ideally we would like the first name to start with a different letter than the other first names in our family (so no A’s, T’s, J’s, or R’s), but we are willing to forgo this requirement if necessary. Since this is the last go round, the stakes feel higher and we are having trouble compromising. Can you come to our rescue?

I think Bennett is great in this sibling group, and I suspect it would not end up being difficult to spell. Versions with one N or one T are not unheard of, but Bennett is the clear primary spelling, and “two N’s and two T’s” is a quick and simple explanation in any situation where there is doubt.

I think Henry is another great option.

My guess is that you chose Anderson and your husband chose Thomas. While your husband’s style is traditional, your style seems more like Surname Names. What I’d like to do is find some surname names that might strike your husband as traditional, and some traditional names that might strike you as a little fresher.

Aidric (repeats initial)
Calvin
Charles
Clark
Davis (repeats ending of Thomas)
Edmund
Everett
Felix
Franklin
Frederick
George
Gideon
Grady
Grant
Harris (repeats ending of Thomas)
Hayes
Ian
Leo
Lincoln
Malcolm
Miles
Nolan
Reid (repeats initial)
Simon
Truman (repeats initial)
Wesley
Wilson (repeats ending of Anderson)

Name update:

Hello,
Thank you (and all the commenters) for all the wonderful suggestions! They were very helpful and got both my husband and I to the bargaining table. Final name selection took awhile, but we welcomed Bennett Victor last week. Since it took so long for us to settle on the final selection, we referred to the baby as Jetpack durning the pregnancy ( big brothers’ pick). Right now he feels more like a Jetpack than anything, so his unofficial nickname nickname might stick!

Hey Swistle,
I am hoping that you can help my husband and I out with our naming road block. We currently have two boys aged 3 and 1 (ironically with the same birthday) named Milo and Theo (surname Benton). Milo’s sex was unknown before birth, and was named after his paternal grandfather (Myles), since both Myles and Milo have identical meaning, we thought it would be nice to give our son his own name, yet, have the meaning remain the same to avoid two Myles B’s in the family. Theo, we knew was a boy. Throughout pregnancy, his name was Archer, but he was just born a Theo- and it suits him. At first I was worried that the two long O endings were a bit much, however, given that other letters are all different, I think both names are finely suited as a sibset. Now, however, we are expecting baby #3 in mid May and are stuck. Although it is too early to find out the sex, we are not sure that we will (this is our last baby, and we like the surprise). Our dilemma lies in the name selection- do we keep the long O ending for the next or is it overkill? We both like short names, so both of us are partial to four letters, two syllables (however we are also open to suggestions). Should we stick with the long O our possibilities lie in Arlo, Otto, Hugo (boy), and Juno, Margo, Cleo (girl). We both agree and like Arlo and Juno but are unsure if it is simply because the fit our trend. If we are not sticking with the long O ending, we have tossed the idea of a long O in the name to compliment the sound (ex: Nora, Nola, Toby). We also like Finn, Jane, and Felix (doesn’t fit any scheme but it’s cute and quirky in my opinion). We are just looking for some direction as to what you suggest from an outside ear and would appreciate any help you can offer :)

I think you are in the happy situation of being able to go either way on this. Rather than deciding first whether or not to go with another -o name, I think if I were you I would try to choose favorites without taking that into account—at least early on in the process. If your top favorite name turns out to be another -o name (or if you find yourself really wanting to use another -o name), I think it’s a fun little theme; if your top favorite name is not an -o name, I think there are upsides to avoiding a theme—especially if you might have more children after this one.

I really like your idea of instead finding a name with a long-O elsewhere in the name:

Chloe
Colette
Elodie
Eloise
Fiona
Hope
Joan
Lois
Naomi
Noelle
Nola
Rosalie
Rose
Simone
Sloane
Sophia
Zola

Brody
Cole
Joel
Joseph
Noah
Owen
Roland

Of your -o options, my own personal favorite for a boy is Arlo. For a girl, I am more uncertain: my own personal favorite is Margo, but sharing first AND last sounds with a sibling’s name is something I’d want to avoid. Juno is my next favorite; I like the nicknames June and Junie.

And I think Finn, Jane, and Felix are all great with the sibling set, too! In short, I think you have a lot of terrific options.

And let’s do a quick one-day Twitter poll: https://twitter.com/Swistle/status/1057268327628840960 [poll closed; see results below:]

Name update:

Good evening,
Baby boy (brother to Milo and Theo) was born on May 27, 2019. We named him Toby Frederick Benton and his name is just perfectly suited to him.
Thanks for all of your help,
Sarah

Hi Swistle!

My husband and I are having a hard time deciding on names for our baby who is due in late April 2019. We don’t plan on finding out baby’s sex so we need to be prepared for a girl or a boy (although big sister insists this is going to be her baby sister.) Our daughter is Rose Elizabeth and our son is Nolan David. Our last name rhymes with Mask.

We like old fashioned names but preferably not top 100 in popularity. Some girls names considered and not ruled out are: Juniper, Pearl, and Willa. Some boys names that we like are Samuel, Samson, and Lincoln. None of them feel just “right” though in the way that our other two kids’ names did. Rose is named after my very close cousin who passed away. Nolan is named for his dad’s favorite baseball player. My husband also says we “wasted the good name on the dog.” Harmon, which I actually agree with him on. I feel like it could have been a contender if it wasn’t already the dog’s name.

This is most likely our last child. We don’t have any middle names in mind but I feel like we could come up with one more easily once we have a first name chosen.

Thanks for your help!

Would Harvey work for a boy? I love that name and would love to see it used more.

If you’re trying to avoid the Top 100, I think you would find any Sam- name too common for your tastes: Samson was only #608 in 2017, according to the Social Security Administration, but Samuel was #21—and has been in the Top 50 for the past 30 years, and hasn’t been out of the Top 100 since the earliest online Social Security search results starting in 1900, so there are lots of Sams of many ages.

Lincoln is more recent: it hit the Top 100 in 2013, and was #41 in 2017. If I had to guess, I’d guess it would continue to rise.

More possibilities to consider:

Rose, Nolan, and Aidric
Rose, Nolan, and Alistair
Rose, Nolan, and Archer
Rose, Nolan, and August
Rose, Nolan, and Branson
Rose, Nolan, and Davis
Rose, Nolan, and Declan
Rose, Nolan, and Desmond
Rose, Nolan, and Edmund
Rose, Nolan, and Elliot
Rose, Nolan, and Everett
Rose, Nolan, and Ezra
Rose, Nolan, and Franklin
Rose, Nolan, and Garrett
Rose, Nolan, and Gilbert
Rose, Nolan, and Grant
Rose, Nolan, and Harris
Rose, Nolan, and Holling
Rose, Nolan, and Keller
Rose, Nolan, and Louis
Rose, Nolan, and Malcolm
Rose, Nolan, and Merritt
Rose, Nolan, and Miles
Rose, Nolan, and Reid
Rose, Nolan, and Rhett
Rose, Nolan, and Simon
Rose, Nolan, and Thompson
Rose, Nolan, and Wells
Rose, Nolan, and Wesley
Rose, Nolan, and Zane

A few of those are Top 100, and a few more are flirting with the line and may cross it in 2018.

I like all three of your girl-name choices in different ways. I think Pearl and Willa are my two favorites, mostly because Juniper feels more contemporary to me: it didn’t enter the Top 1000 until 2011, while little girls named Rose and Pearl and Willa have been in classrooms together for at least the past century.

I got sidetracked here because I was interested: Juniper feels more contemporary to me, but is it? It certainly seems as if it could have been a companion of Ivy and Hazel, and I have been surprised by names before. I checked the Social Security database that goes back to 1880 (unlike the online search which only goes back to 1900) and includes all the names given to five or more infants of that sex that year (unlike the online search which only includes the Top 1000 names). I wanted to see if Juniper was in use way back then, but maybe just uncommon. In 1880, there is no entry for Juniper, which means fewer than five babies were given the name that year. In 1890: no Junipers. In 1900: no Junipers. In 1910: no Junipers. None in 1920, 1930, 1940, 1950, 1960. Finally in 1969: 5 new baby girls named Juniper. From there, here are the number of new baby girls given the name Juniper in the United States, at five-year intervals:

1969: 5
1974: 23
1979: 9
1984: 6
1989: –
1994: 7
1999: 14
2004: 33
2009: 170
2014: 643 (plus 9 new baby boys named Juniper)

And in 2017, there were 1,033 new baby girls and 6 new baby boys given the name Juniper. In Juniper we have an interesting thing: a contemporary name that fits well with the vintage revival botanical names such as Rose, Violet, Rosemary, Hazel, and Ivy, while also sounding similar to and going well with names such as Harper and Piper and Skylar and Paisley. The Wikipedia article on the name suggests some possible sources for the recent usage: a song called Jennifer Juniper in 1969; the movie Bennie & Joon in 1993; the book Juniper, Gentian, and Rosemary in 1998; and a cartoon series called The Life and Times of Juniper Lee in 2005-2007.

Anyway! More possibilities to consider:

Rose, Nolan, and Ada
Rose, Nolan, and Alice
Rose, Nolan, and Cecily
Rose, Nolan, and Clara
Rose, Nolan, and Cora
Rose, Nolan, and Eliza
Rose, Nolan, and Fern
Rose, Nolan, and Iris
Rose, Nolan, and Ivy
Rose, Nolan, and Josephine
Rose, Nolan, and June
Rose, Nolan, and Lois
Rose, Nolan, and Louise
Rose, Nolan, and Lydia
Rose, Nolan, and Mabel
Rose, Nolan, and Marilla
Rose, Nolan, and May
Rose, Nolan, and Molly
Rose, Nolan, and Stella
Rose, Nolan, and Sylvia

Name update:

Our daughter was born in early April 2019 and we named her after my husband’s grandmother, Grace. Her name is Grace Evangeline, and it suits her well.