Liann writes:

My husband and I are due with our first baby, a boy, on September 20. Long before we got pregnant, I would make lists upon lists of baby names, and boy am I glad I did… I can only imagine how much harder finding the right name would have been if i didn’t already have those lists. As of right now, we have it narrowed down to three names. I would love your feedback and your readers feedback, but also any new suggestions, if you think a name just doesn’t flow. This baby will have two middle names, the second of which is my maiden name, and our last name sounds like Sny-kiss (with a long I sound in the first syllable).

Our current list is:

Emmett Rhys O’Keefe Snykiss – We both really like this name and how the whole thing flows. I particularly love Rhys in the middle – as we couldn’t use it in the first spot because it would blend into our last name. And I love Emmett, I’m just not sure it won’t get too popular with the whole Twilight situation, of which I am not a fan. Should I even be worried about that?

Arlo Desmond O’Keefe Snykiss – Arlo has been a favorite of mine for a while. It took hubby a little while to warm up to it but he recently told me it’s one of his top picks because it feels like it’s an old school name and he thinks are little boy has an old soul (I LOVED hearing that from him because our naming conversations have been mainly one-sided). Desmond is a name that has only recently been on our radar, mainly because of the character on LOST. We would not be naming him after the character, but the association does not hurt in our opinion.

Tate Henry O’Keefe Snykiss – Tate is the newest name to our list. And while we do like it, I have become worried about the bully nick-naming possibilities (particularly regarding a certain body part), and I don’t know if it’s inevitable. I have also noticed that Tate crosses the gender barrier slightly and I’m not really interested in having a gender neutral name for my son. Is Tate really going to the girls? And we chose Henry because it is my grandfather’s name and we could not come up with any other options for middles for Tate. Any suggestions?

So that’s it. We would love to have a few solid choices to go into the delivery with and hopefully once we meet him, one will just seem right. Thanks!

 
Would you want to reverse Tate and Henry and consider Henry Tate O’Keefe Snykiss? Tate might not go completely to the girls, but I do consider it a name that can be either for boys or for girls.

I don’t think of Emmett as Twilighty—but I’ve only read the first book. Perhaps Twilight fans can weigh in on this.

But dude, you’re not leaving me with any other work to do! Emmett Rhys and Arlo Desmond are both spectacular names. I think all that’s left to do is a poll, which I’ll put over to the right. (Poll closed; see results below.)

Name update! Liann writes:

I want to thank you and your readers for your input on our son’s name. The little man arrived on 9/23 at 7:59 a.m., 8lbs. 8.6oz., and 19 3/4 in. long. However, my naming fears came true and none of the names on our final list seemed to fit. So, we went back to the drawing board and consulted our lists, where we found the perfect name for our new baby boy.. Duncan Henry O’Keefe Snykiss is happy and healthy and we could not be more pleased with him and his name. Thank you again for your help!

Alexis writes:

Hello! We are expecting our second son this September 13, and are completely baffled as to what this little child’s name should be. Last go-round, it was easy. We named our first son Emerson immediately, and that was it. Now we find that, strangely, little girls have started appearing with the same name as boy #1. We still love his name and it totally suits him, but if we can exclude names also used for girls, it would be nice.

My husband’s last name (and the last name of our kiddos) is Adcock. We both loved the name Pierce until we realized that Pierce Adcock would probably be called Prince Albert all of his life. We also like Arlo, but aren’t 100% sold on it. We love literary names (hence Emerson) and names related to music, but are open to other suggestions. We want to use a family name as a middle name, which will probably end up being James or Douglas. Here are our finalists:

Beckett
Auden
Whitman
Miles
Archer
Elliott
Everett
Griffin

I think that, honestly, if we used any of these names, we’d probably be happy, but we just can’t decide! Also, are some of these names becoming trendy or possibly used for girls? We are open for suggestions as well. Help us, Swistle!

Thank you!

 
I think we need a poll! I’ll put it over to the right! (Poll closed; see results below.)

Name update! Alexis writes:

Our baby boy arrived last week and, true to form, we dithered until the last possible minute. We had it narrowed down to three names, but when the birth certificate lady came in to give us an ultimatum on the last day in the hospital, my husband and I agreed on a name at the same time. Eliot James is a lovely big boy, and we are really grateful to everyone for helping us choose the perfect name for him!

Kelyn writes:

I am due mid Sept and my husband and I are having trouble agreeing on a name for our second daughter. Our first daughter’s name, Atley, was suggested to us early in the pregnancy and we immediately agreed on it. Naming decisions have been a bit more contentious this time around. Our last name is Naughton. My husband and I both have “K” names so I’ve been steering clear of those. The main problem is that I like unusual names and while my husband isn’t opposed to them he wants them to have a very familiar sound. We’d nearly agreed on Harper but it’s steady, almost astronomical, rise in popularity has turned me off. If it weren’t for that problem, I think we’d have a winner. Other names that have made the short list we can agree on are: Beckett, Dempsey, Connelly, and Sutton. As you can see, I’m one of those…a stealer of surnames and boys’ names for my little girl. I’d apologize but I just can’t help myself. It may still come down to one of these names but since we’re not in love with any one of them, can you suggest any similar names that match well with Atley? Thanks!!!

I suggest Arlo. It’s a boy’s name, but it has a similar sound to Marlo and Margo, and its gentle sound makes it a good girl-name crossover. It also has the “ar” sound like in Harper. Arlo Naughton. Atley and Arlo.

Or Winslow. Winslow Naughton. Atley and Winslow.

It’s too bad it’s a K name, because I think Kiefer might be adorable on a little girl. Kiefer Naughton. Atley and Kiefer.

Murphy works because although it’s a boy’s name, Murphy Brown made it almost too girl-associated to use for boys. Murphy Naughton. Atley and Murphy. (But I’d avoid a middle name starting with A.)

Brice is a boy’s name, but the sound reminds me of Bree and Chrissy—as well as sugar/spice/nice. Brice Naughton. Atley and Brice.

My friend and fellow name aficionado Mairzy is going to KILL me, but Sterling is a boy name that would make a good girl name. Sterling Naughton, Atley and Sterling. (Oh, I am in such trouble.)

Memphis would be pretty on a girl. Memphis Naughton, Atley and Memphis.

Bridger is a boy name, but it’s closeness to Bridget makes it hard to use. Bridger Naughton, Atley and Bridger.

The King of England gave up his throne to marry a Wallis. Wallis Naughton, Atley and Wallis.

I love the name Percy, but it’s almost too gentle to use on a boy. Percy Naughton, Atley and Percy.

Same with Clarence: great name, but hard to use for a boy. Clarence Naughton, Atley and Clarence.

I read a book with a little girl in it named Fisher, and I have to admit I was completely won over. Fisher Naughton, Atley and Fisher.

Name update 09-03-2010! Kelyn writes:

Our liitle lady arrived a couple of weeks early. Thankfully, we’d agreed on a name the day before I went into labor. Her grandma says she decided to join us when she finally heard the name she wanted. We decided on Caris Violet. In the end it’s not a boy’s name or a surname. Despite not picking one of the many names recommended by you and your readers, you really did help us come to a decision. Caris was one of my favorite names from the start but my husband wasn’t sold. Your responses forced us to sit down and really look at all the options and hallelujah we came to an agreement. Thanks for your help!

Jennifer writes:

I’d love your (and your readers!) help with figuring out a name for our second son. In theory, he’s due September 8, but I’m already having contractions, so who knows when he will actually arrive (my first was early). Our last name sounds like Poyer, and unfortunately, my husband and I don’t have a lot of overlap in our name tastes. I tend to like uncommon but familiar western names (think Graham, Alexander, or Dominic), whereas my husband likes even more unusual names (Ellis, Anders, or Cyrus).

For our first son, we finessed the issue by naming our son after our fathers, giving him a very common, traditional first name (John) and a Chinese middle name which is essentially unheard of in the States. His nickname, Kue, (pronounced like the letter Q) is based on his middle name.

There are a few characteristics that we do NOT want for a name:
* is currently very popular (e.g., any of the _aydens)
* does not have a good nickname (of course, this is a grey area)
* is not a “real” name (I know this is a grey area too)
* starts with the letter K or the letter Q (due to our first son’s name)
* has a strong religious connotation (e.g. Moses)
* is a variant of “John” (e.g. Ian)

The only name we come close to agreeing on is Griffin, but neither of us loves it. My top contender is Graham, but my husband doesn’t like it. My husband’s top choice is Ellis, but I am not excited about people calling my son El (which makes me think Elle) for short. Other names we’ve considered but rejected include: Desmond, Everett, Nicolas, and Micah (mine, rejected by my husband) and Linnell, Malkmus, Munro, and Riven (my husband’s, rejected by me). Still on the consideration list are: Dominic, Alexander, Anders, Cyrus, but they are all just hanging on by a thread, as we are not too fond of the others’ picks.

Help!

Thanks!

The name Griffin makes me think of names like Finn, Finian, Flynn. Finian can be used with the nickname Finn, which sounds good with Kue.

Ellis makes me think of Harris or Harrison, with the nickname Harry.

Anders makes me think of Anderson—and now that we have Harrison and Anderson I’m thinking of Nicholson and Everson instead of Nicolas/Everett.

Griffin and Everett make me think of Garrett.

Ellis and Everett make me think of Elliot. There’s still the potential “El” problem, especially since there aren’t any other good nicknames, but Li/Lee might work as a nickname to fend off El.

Micah and Malkmus make me think of Malcolm. Or Michael, which is so good with John, and perhaps repeat your idea of using a nickname from a middle name?

Cyrus makes me think of Silas and Elias.

Nothing makes me think of Corin, but I think it’s good. Or Corbin. Or Gibson. Or Ruben. Or Lennox.

Alexander from your list is the #4 most popular boy name in the United States. Maybe Alec instead? Alistair? Albin? Alan?

Name update 09-09-2010! Jennifer writes:

Lachlan Vincent was born earlier this week! Lachlan was unusual enough for my husband, but common enough (at least, in Australia and Canada) for me, and it sounds similar to my husband’s grandfather’s name. And Vincent is my grandfather’s name. Thanks again to everyone for their input!

Kristi writes:

We really need some help! I’m due with our second child, a girl, Sept 8. We had very little problem coming up with our son’s name – wanted something uncommon (but not unusual) thereby ending up using family names of Warren Geoffrey (Jof-free). Our last name sounds like Cavenner, and I’m conscious of the mouth-full effect of a 3 syllable last name. My name is Kristi, so growing up in the 80’s-90’s there were always other “Christy/Christie/Kristy/Kristie’s” around and I don’t want an overly popular name where my child has to go by last initial for differentiation. My husband is highly attracted to historical names, especially those with roots in the US founding, and doesn’t care if the name is popular or not. We are attempting to keep the strong contenders and possible final decision a surprise so I’m not discussing this with friends and family.

It seems that all the names I have originally been attracted to are either popular or gaining popularity. My favorite girl name since I was in high school is Charlotte, but apparently that is supposed to be “the name” this year. Other names I like but am dismissing due to popularity are Samantha & Madelyn. My husband really likes Abigail (I suggested this before I realized its popularity, but he likes it because it is the name of John Adams’ wife). Now he thinks that since I suggested the name and he likes it, it’s carved in stone – I’m not sold! I like the name Rose, for its simplicity, implied grace and lack of over-use. For middle names my husband is adamantly stuck on either Madison, after James Madison, or Pinckney (Pink-nee) a family surname.

I’d really like your opinion and possibly outside suggestions for classic, feminine, fresh names. Unless you can help me come up with some good ammunition/alternatives, my daughter’s name is going to be Abigail Madison Cavenner. Two of the most popular names today and a 3-3-3 syllable name. Not a bad name, but not the unique moniker I wanted.

We could look to the second President Adams’s wife, whose name was Louisa Catherine (source: Wikipedia list of first ladies). We still end up with a 3-3-3 pattern (though I like that), and we end up with names that are currently in favor but not as common as Abigail and Madison.

I think if I were you I would find some names you like and then see if you can find anyone with those names in the right time period. This is what I did with my own husband, who likes scientists: when I thought of a name I really wanted to use, I pitched it to him as being after a scientist with the same name.

Or, look around in early U.S. history and see if any of the names interest you. Look at surnames and middle names and maiden names as well as first names. Here’s where I started searching: Wikipedia: Women in the American Revolution. Margaret Corbin and Margaret Kemble Gage give us the name Margaret, and also the name Kemble if you want something very uncommon. Esther de Berdt gives us the name Esther, a name that’s stayed consistently in the 200s/300s for decades. Do you like the name Molly? There’s Molly Stark and the story/nickname of Molly Pitcher (maybe a real woman or maybe something like Rosie the Riveter). And there are plenty of Catherines, Kates, Janes, Marys, Elizabeths, Sarahs, Annes and Annas, if you like any of those. And for something more unusual, Frederika, Bailey, and Lindley.

I really like the name Pinckney for the middle name, if it works with the first name you choose: it’s unusual, it’s a family name, and the “pink” sound keeps it girly.

If you want to avoid popular, avoid fresh: anything that sounds fresh will also be sounding fresh to thousands of other parents. Test the name: say it to yourself, and if you get a little smack of cool, moist freshness, cross it off because we can almost guarantee it will be swooping up in popularity.

I like:

Esther Pinckney Cavenner; Warren and Esther
Frederika Pinckney Cavenner; Warren and Frederika
Louisa Pinckney Cavenner; Warren and Louisa
Margaret Pinckney Cavenner; Warren and Margaret
Molly Pinckney Cavenner; Warren and Molly
Rose Pinckney Cavenner; Warren and Rose

I also like Abigail Pinckney Cavenner. Abigail is a Top Ten name, but in my area they all seem to be going by Abby—so if yours goes by Abigail she might not need an initialed surname even if there’s another in her class. The national usage of the name is at .71%—or roughly 7 Abigails per 1,000 baby girls. Charlotte may indeed jump this year, but last year it was roughly 2 Charlottes per 1,000 baby girls. That’s not too bad, commonness-wise.

Name update 09-19-2010! Kristi writes:

Thanks so much for all the suggestions! Rose Marion Cavenner was born last week. Seeing all the responses helped sway my husband to Rose and reevaluate the middle names. We decided on Marion, another family name that had been previously discissed and dismissed. After meeting our little lady we decided Rose Marion was perfect!

Thanks again for all the help!

K. writes:

I wanted to write you months ago for help naming our second child, a boy, but I knew it wouldn’t be my turn until close to my due date (9/4) and I was certain we would have a name already chosen by then. Well, we don’t, so I am writing to you now. Our daughter’s name is Anna. Our tentative boy name for the past several years was Spencer and we would always refer to a potential future son as Spence. When we found out we were having a boy, I thought there was probably an 80% chance that would be his name because my husband doesn’t like to think too much about names (he tends to be the typical male “veto-er” of my suggestions). So I was surprised when my husband said he wasn’t sure Spencer was his name, and wondered if Spence was really just a pre-birth nickname, like calling your baby “pickle” or something like that. So after I suggested a buzzillion names to hubby, his only response was “I feel like we just haven’t heard the name yet.” Which left me stumped, because hubby in particular doesn’t like names that are “weird” so I didn’t think looking for MORE unusual names was going to help. We both tend to like timeless, easily spellable/pronounceable, biblical, and not too “ethnic” sorts of names. So I left it at, “Well, here are my top choices. If you don’t come up with something else, we are going to have to choose from those.” My husband, bless him, has now done some thinking about it and actually LOOKED AT A BABY NAME BOOK (briefly). He suggested Jacob (he likes the biblical story of Jacob’s transition from self-reliance to dependence on God) or Nathaniel. I vetoed Jacob as a first name, due to its popularity, although I like the name otherwise. So hubby decided he thought baby’s name was Nathaniel, and I was/am prepared to name him that, as I like the idea of him being named by his father, and I like the name (although not quite as much as MY names). And then a few days ago, husband says, “I’m having second thoughts about Nathaniel. I’m thinking about Spencer again.” Interesting. So all this is to say, we very well may not have a name picked out until after baby is born. I’m hoping that once we see him, we will both have a strong feeling about a name. Hopefully the same name! Anyway, I think the first name will be one of our top 4 choices:

Spencer: I like it for it’s timeless quality and the fact that it is familiar but not too popular. I think it goes well with Anna. Spence Lee reminds me a bit of Bruce Lee, but I can live with it. Husband thinks the name is kind of geeky.

Nathaniel: I think this is still my husband’s top choice. I like it, but wonder if the “L” at the end of it blends too much with the “L” at the beginning of Lee. I also like Nate, but it does sound pretty choppy with our last name.

Elliot: This may be my top choice. I have liked this name for a long time. My biggest concerns are people misspelling it, and maybe that it is becoming a girl name. Husband likes it okay, but also thinks it is geeky.

Benjamin: This is a name I really like, despite the fact that it is fairly common. I love both Benjamin (I think of a hot guy like Benjamin Bratt) and Ben (a nice guy). I love Benji but husband absolutely vetoes this nickname. He threatens to call baby “Uncle Benny” as a nickname, which I detest. Ben Lee sounds choppy too…as do pretty much all nicknames with our last name. I guess that is the beauty of Elliot–no nickname.

I think at the end of the day, I will let my husband have the biggest say in choosing his first name. Anna was a name I loved for years and years and I just don’t feel as strongly about any of our boy names. I like all of them, and I assume that any one of them would grow on me and become our son’s name once we named him. I am interested in what you and your readers think is the best name for us though!

My bigger plea, however, is for first name/middle name combos. We chose Anna’s middle name, Grace, a few days after she was born. We knew it didn’t have the best flow (not a concern to my husband), but chose it for its meaning. I had several medical complications at the end of my pregnancy and had some scares in terms of her birth and health. When she arrived safely and perfectly healthy, we wanted to recognize the significance, and chose to name her after God’s grace to us. My husband in particular is much more concerned with meaning (recognizing our Christian faith in God) than flow or how a particular name sounds. I am a bit overwhelmed with trying to come up with at least four first/middle name options (knowing husband may do his veto thing again anyway). I think I would like at least one biblical name/meaning in the combo, which means a biblical middle name for Spencer. I would love to use middle names from our top four…I am just not sure how they sound together. Two possible combos are Spencer Nathaniel and Elliot Jacob. How does Nathaniel Elliot Lee sound? Benjamin really stumps me. Other names “we” might like: Ezra, Abram, Isaac, Judah, Josiah, Jonas, Theodore, Jude, Asher, Calvin (family name), and John (family name). I love Gabriel and Luke, but they don’t sound good with our last name. I also like Graham, Simon, Tate, Cole, Dane, and Franklin but hubby has vetoed. Samuel was taken by two close friends.

Thanks in advance for your help!

It’s too bad your surname begins with L, because otherwise Paul (whose conversion story is one of the most dramatic in the Bible) would be a great choice for you.

I think it would be worthwhile to revisit the idea of Jacob. Your husband likes the story; you both like the name; it’s great with your surname; and even though it’s the #1 most popular boy name in the United States, not even 1% of boys were given the name in 2009—and there’s been a small but steady decrease in that percentage since 1998, when it was #2 but 1.78% (source: Social Security Administration). At its current percentage, that’s roughly 1 in 100 boys—or a rough average of one Jacob per six or seven 30-kid classrooms (assuming approximately half the children are boys). I like Jacob Nathaniel Lee, or Jacob Spencer Lee, or Jacob Calvin Lee, Jacob Benjamin Lee, or maybe one of the names you like but your husband doesn’t: Jacob Graham Lee, Jacob Franklin Lee, etc.

If Nathaniel has an L problem and Nate is too short, maybe Nathan? He was the guy in the Bible who called King David out for stealing someone else’s wife, and that takes guts. Plus, his name means “God-given.” I like Nathan Elliot Lee and Nathan Benjamin Lee.

If you do use Nathaniel, I like Nathaniel Benjamin Lee best. I also like Nathaniel Jacob Lee. I think Nathaniel Elliot Lee has a lot of L in it, but on the other hand I think the repeating L-sounds tie the name together.

If you use Benjamin, I like Benjamin Elliot Lee or Benjamin Jacob Lee. I think Benjamin Nathaniel Lee works too.

I like Spencer Elliot Lee, Spencer Benjamin Lee, AND Spencer Nathaniel Lee.

All right, everyone! Make some combinations!

Name update 09-04-2010! K. writes:

Nathaniel John is here! We weren’t any more decided after he was born, so we eventually just had to make a decision. I was tempted by the suggestion of James for a middle name, but we were most swayed by the meaning of the names. Nathaniel means “given by God” or “gift of God” and John means “God is gracious”. And that pretty much sums up how we feel. Our beautiful son was a gift from our gracious God! Thanks for the help.