Hello,
We are due with our 5th (and final) baby in Jan and are having a tough time figuring this one out.
Our last name sounds like Statmiller (with a silent d before the second t). We currently have 2 girls and 2 boys and will not be finding out the gender of the baby until he or she arrives.
Our children’s names are Tessa Rose, Bennett Joseph, Cora Elizabeth and Palmer Francis. We like unique but not unheard of first names and more traditional for a middle name.The trouble we are having is that we don’t want to use a duplicate first letter of the name and all of our children’s first letter has an E sound to it when saying it by itself. (T, B, C, P)
And would like to continue that since we call them by their first letter when in a hurry or when they are playing sports and we are cheering them on. The other constraint we have gotten ourselves into is each first name is 2 syllables and we would like to stick to that.
So based on that we are down to D, E, G, V and Z which doesn’t leave us much to choose from. Are we being too restrictive and should just pick a name we like? Or do we continue with down the path we have already taken?If we were open to not following our naming history here are the names on our very short list:
Ada Marie
Lettie MarieHarris Alexander
Any advice and name suggestions would be greatly appreciated!
Thank you,
Katie
In my experience, naming got both MORE and LESS difficult as we had more children. It got more difficult because although we weren’t completely opposed to repeating initials, we did PREFER the idea of not repeating, and so gradually we reduced the number of initials we wanted to use. Certain sounds started to seem too repetitive, or at least we would prefer not to reuse them. We wondered about repeating endings and vowel sounds. We ran low on obvious honor names.
On the other hand I felt, especially with our fifth, that some of the pressure was off: when there are so MANY children, who would expect the parents to be as consistent with their naming style? Who would blame them if they DID repeat an initial? Who would blame them if they stopped a pattern that seemed fun for the first few children but then became burdensome? Who would blame them if they JUST SORT OF RAN OUT OF NAMES?
Also, I’d seen how my various concerns with earlier names had come to nothing: my hand-wringing, lie-awake fretting about syllables and number of letters and Which Of Two Equally Good Honor Names Should We Use was completely forgotten until I was pregnant again and looking over my old naming notes.
Here’s where I am going with this. When I started reading your letter, and I got to the part where you want a FIFTH baby to have a name that is two syllables AND a different initial AND TO HAVE THAT INITIAL RHYME WITH THE OTHER CHILDREN’S INITIALS, my mouth actually dropped open. What? WHAT?? I re-read it to make sure I had understood. Why are you playing this game on ULTIMATE HARD MODE when you don’t have to, and when it’s not resulting in any names you like?
On one hand, I wish to attempt to give you what you want—and we WILL attempt that. On the other hand, I feel you have backed yourself into a completely unnecessary corner. To whatever extent it is in my power, I wish to free you from feeling that you are somehow locked in to giving this baby a two-syllable name, or a rhyming-but-distinct initial. I won’t tell you that NO ONE IN THE ENTIRE WORLD would notice or care, because, well, you are currently standing in the midst of a community that does in fact notice and feel interested in such things—but even WE don’t DEEP-DOWN care if all five members of a sibling group have the same number of syllables in their names! Even WE don’t typically look at the first initials of a sibling group and notice if they RHYME or not!
Obviously, OBVIOUSLY, if these things matter to YOU, that is what is important. But…I am thinking back to all the things that Mattered Very Much to me when I was pregnant and lying awake, and then thinking about how little those things matter to me now, and I am wondering if we can bring you any peace on this. It seems so unlikely to me that in 30 years you will be visiting Ada’s/Harris’s house and looking at them across the dinner table and wishing you had found a name for them that had an initial that sounded more like their siblings’ initials when you yelled it at a sports event. YES, you are being too restrictive! YES!
I am very, very, very, very interested in baby names, and would have looked at your children’s names carefully and repeatedly and with far more attention than the typical person who will encounter their names, and I don’t think it would ever have occurred to me that all the first initials rhymed; I’m not sure I would have noticed that all the names had two syllables. In fact, let me ask you this question and hope it doesn’t backfire: How much time have you spent noticing and thinking about the syllables/initials of the sibling groups of your friends and relatives? If you’re like me, you might say, “Well, ACTUALLY: SOME!!” But…like, LOTS? Have you ever thought about whether their initials rhyme? Did/do you CARE if their initials rhyme?
If anything, I would think that if you commonly holler the children’s initials, you would NOT want another one that sounds so similar to the first four. If anything, I would think that after four two-syllable names in a row, you might wish to break up the rhythm a little. Think of the charming storybook rhythm of a sibling group that is “DAH-da, DAH-da, DAH-da, DAH-da, and DAH.”
Okay brisk clap! Your FIRST assignment, together or separately or both, is to make a list of names but with NO THOUGHT AT ALL to all your self-imposed constraints. Put down names that duplicate an initial! Put down names that use initials that don’t rhyme with E! Put down names that have more or less than two syllables! Put down names that don’t even go well with the other sibling names! Put down names you can’t use because someone close to you already used it, or because there is a bad association, or because it sounds much too similar to one of the other kids’ names! Just make a list of every single name you like/love. EVEN IF you do decide not to repeat an initial, you might notice something about the repeating-initial names that helps you find a non-repeating-initial name. EVEN IF you do decide it’s important to you that the baby’s first initial rhymes with their siblings’ first initials, you might notice something about the non-rhyming-initial names that helps you find a rhyming-initial name. And so on.
It may also give you a better feeling for the PRICE of meeting preferences. If you were to put every name in the world in order from the one you liked most to the one you liked least, how far down your list would you be willing to go to get an initial you prefer? When you weigh, say, your top 1% of names against the names that meet your requirements, which do you WANT MORE? It seriously does come down to the weight of preferences: there are names I would score higher than names I used, but other preferences DID weigh more. It cost something to use those names, but it was worth the price to me. On the other hand, at some point those preferences started weighing relatively less: I WASN’T willing to use a name I liked Much Less, just to meet a preference I was free to choose not to follow. You may find, for example, that the price of meeting all your preferences is choosing a name you don’t really like, and you may find you’re not willing to pay that price. If you remove a preference, does that make the cost more reasonable? What if you remove another preference? And so on.
If you find a name you love that starts with a non-rhyming initial, I wonder if you could do a MIDDLE name with a rhyming initial and make that work? T, B, C, P, and L-V, for example.
In the meantime, we will also get to work. My plan is to go ahead and try to solve the naming puzzle with all restrictions in place, because that’s like a game, and name games can be fun.
So: Game Mode. The only available initials are D, E, G, V, and Z; the name must have two syllables.
Daisy
Darcy
Della
Ella
Esme
Estelle (kind of a lot of ST and LL with the surname)
Etta (maybe too close to Bennett)
Eva
Gemma
Ginny
Greta
Vera
Zara
Dalton
Davis
Declan
Desmond
Devin
Duncan
Dillon/Dylan
Easton
Ellis (might combine with surname to sound like Ella Statmiller)
Garrett (may be too similar to Bennett)
Gilbert
Gordon
Grady
Griffin
Vincent
I think my own favorites are Greta and Davis. Greta Statmiller; Tessa, Bennett, Cora, Palmer, and Greta. Davis Statmiller; Tessa, Bennett, Cora, Palmer, and Davis.
Name update:
Hello!
I am writing to update you and thank you for the name help. After reading your response and readers responses it gave me relief from all the self imposed restrictions.
I was pretty convinced we were having a girl and focused on that. When we had a boy it came as quite a surprise and left us trying to decide on a name. We took your advice and made a list of names with no constraints. To our surprise there was no names we agreed on that fit our “rules” but we happily agreed on one name!Albie Robert
To us it works well with his siblings names with still being fresh to him! And if we HAVE to use a rhyming sound we can call him E for his syllable.Thank you for helping free us from our naming constraints!
As always, Swistle is dead on. Greta and Davis are 👌🏼👌🏼👌🏼
I would also like to add a few that are popping to mind, I’m not checking their popularity so they may not work for you.
Zora
Viva (pronounced Vie-vah, my aunt’s name!)
Gracie
Ginger
Diane
Dovie
Dinah
Emmy
Grayson
Evan
Vance (one syllable but it’s so cool)
Dexter
And a few more using your criteria:
Girls: Daphne, Dana, Demi, Eden, Gia, Griffin, Vanna, Zoe
Boys: Derek, Davin, Ethan, Eric, Gannon, Graham, Gavin, Vincent, Zander, Zayden
Best of luck with the little one!
Some of these suggestions echo Swistle’s.
Daphne
Darcie/Darcy
Deidre/Deirdre
Elin (with a long E sound)
Esme
Giselle
Vera
Zara
Zena
Dayton
Dennis
Dexter
Dillon
Edwin
Gavin
Granger
Griffin
Victor
Vincent
Zander
Zion
Without any restrictions, I like Meredith, Merrit/Merritt/Marit, or Willow for a girl and Quinn or Vaughn for a boy.
Best wishes to you and please let us know the baby’s name when s/he arrives!
Until I got to the two-syllable requirement I was all in on Eliza.
Congratulations on #5! I agree with everything Swistle says above. It might be fun and freeing to list all the names that bring you joy without limits of restrictions or preferences.
Your story reminds me when I was pregnant with my fourth. A family member asked if I was going to continue the pattern of giving my children 7-letter names. I hadn’t even noticed my older three all had 7-letter names! And then I worried for weeks about finding another 7-letter name and fretting that if I didn’t, my 8-letter or 5-letter child would feel left out forever.
It was helpful to remind myself that choosing a name with a certain number of letters had never ever been a preference of mine.
I didn’t choose a 7-letter name. And no one has ever noticed.
I agree with Swistle! Spot on! Also LOVE Greta and Davis.
Just a thought, if you end up choosing a name that doesn’t go with the rules/the remaining rhyming initials, V means 5 so you could always play it that way. Name the baby Harris but sometimes call him V for #5! Perhaps not as tidy as you were thinking, but could be a neat solution! Best of luck and congratulations!
I agree that you shouldn’t make things harder on yourself, but consider: Elise.
If baby #5 is your last I would personally lean hard into a Z name (syllable difficulty level optional).
Zola
Zinnia (Zin, Zinny)
Zane
Zachary (Zack)
V = five is also pretty cute.
Violet
Viola
Vivienne
Virgil
Viggo
Vance
I 100% agree with Swistle that I think you’re asking for too much here. Although… you do have some good options thrown out here, so maybe you’ll find something, but I would lean toward 1) non-repeating initial and maybe 2) initial that sounds good to shout out (e.g. adding Q, X, M… but leaving out I, W, Y… this is very subjective, though), and drop the other requirements entirely.
With that in mind, some further ideas:
Miriam, Maisie, Vivian, Veronica, Nellie, Stella, Sylvie, Millie, Jane, Lillian, Felicity, Ruby
Luca/Lucas, Marcus, Leo (although this is climbing in popularity), Sebastian, Gabriel, Felix, Garrett, Elliott, Max
And a special shoutout for my absolute favorite idea: Quincy or Quinton/Quentin. I LOVE LOVE LOVE the idea of using these for an actual fifth child. They’re two syllables. They fit your style. Q is such a fun initial to go by – and the “differentness” of it not rhyming is tied together by the fact that the name itself references the place in the sibset. This is my absolute favorite boys’ name for you – and Quincy or Quinn could work for a girl as well, although I’m not sure that’s your style.
Throwing all the rules to the wind, these also jump out as cute with your sibset:
Phoebe, Celia, Talia, Willa, Harriet
Walter, Asher, Wilson, Winston, Wallace, Warren, Wesley/Westley, Pax, Thomas
I also really do love Ada with your other kids. A is not quite as good for shouting as, say, T, but it isn’t terrible.
And just for fun (because as Swistle said, it is fun!) here are a couple more that fit your exact parameters:
Violet (I personally say this with 2 syllables but YMMV), Zelie, Zilla(h),
Vernon, Everett (again, I say this closer to 2 syllables than 3… but it’s iffy. And maybe too close to Bennett)
My favorites are Jane, Ruby, Ada, Vivian, and QUINCY!
Oh! I was also thinking of but forgot: Xander and Xavier. Both are 2 syllables the way I pronounce them, and X is another super fun initial to go by. Xanthe is a possibility for a girl, but I feel like it’s probably more out there than you’re looking for.
I can’t think of how to pronounce Xavier with anything other than four syllables and I’m so curious how you say it!
I can’t be the only one sitting here saying this name a bunch to figure out different syllable rhythms, right? I get something like “Ex-zay-vee-er” (4); “Zay-vee-er” (3); and “Zay-vier” (2) — but I don’t naturally lean to the 2 syllable version.
ZAY vyur is how I pronounce it when I read it, but I’ve never met one in person!
Yep, this is how I say it! Maybe a little closer to Zave-yer – attaching the V to the first sylable makes the I even closer to a Y sound.
I also tend to prounce names like Amelia as 3 syllables (a-meel-ya), which I know is also a bit baffling to some people, lol.
Zayv-yer
I feel like this baby’s name is Jane. I like breaking up the 2 syllable, and J is an excellent initial to yell. I know because I call my Jonathan “J” regularly.
I so enjoyed your response, Swistle. That was almost as fun as the naming challenge! :D Greta & Davis are great.
Before I’d finished reading your letter, I was thinking Veda! And then I see like Ada so it seems like it could be a contender! Veda Marie. Zelie also as a tweak on Lettie! Gracie, Daphne, Elin!
And if you could lose the 2-syllable rule, I love Garrison for you! (Tweaking Harris!) Drummond, Eli, Viggo, Ziggy (if you’re feeling daring!)
I see I’m seconding and thirding some suggestions so they must be good lol! Good luck! If I were you, I’d 100% drop one of the rules (the syllables seem easiest to go without matching!)
First of all, congratulations!! I love a name game! Sibling to Tessa, Bennet, Cora, and Palmer…
DEGVZ
Daish
Daphne
Goldie
Elsie
Vesper
Violet
Zelda
Zara
Devin
Davis
Deacon
Emmett
Ellis
Two of the names at the top of my list are Zoe and Vincent. I think Zoe Alexandra or Vincent Alexander go well with your gang :)
I also like Vera, Vince, Zora and Zander or Xander.
Before reading the requirements I thought Hugo and Eloise.
Congrats on baby #5!
I’m going to list names that fit the patterns I noticed when reading the kids’ names. (I usually notice patterns, and I’d never notice the initial thing.)
Those patterns are:
2 syllables, ends in A, for girls
2 syllables, surname, for boys
With these patterns, Ada Marie and Harris Alexander are perfect.
But here are some other options:
Willa Marie. Tessa, Cora and Willa.
Petra Marie. Tessa, Cora and Petra.
Isla Marie. Tessa, Cora and Isla.
Miller Alexander. Bennett, Palmer and Miller.
Felix Alexander. Bennett, Palmer and Felix.
Robins Alexander. Bennett, Palmer and Robins.
Also, I love Margot and Ethan for this family, despite not following the patterns.
Margot Marie. Tessa, Cora and Margot.
Ethan Alexander. Bennett, Palmer and Ethan.
I noticed the end in -a pattern for girls, too, especially because Ada ends in a and is the one current favorite. I love Vera because it fulfills all the criteria and seems the right vibe!
DEGVZ? Two syllables not super common? Game on!
Danae
Daisy
Emrys
Elise
Garnet
Gracie
Violet
Vera
Velma
Zelie
Zoey
Daniel
Daxton
Easton
Ethan
Garrett
Gavin
Victor
Vinny
Zayden
Zander
I’m finding myself rooting for this family to stick to their rules around initials. We all have to play arbitrary little games to narrow the entire universe of possible names down to ones that seem like possible names for new members of our families…and this seems like a sweet and wholesome one worth indulging, that recognizes how this particular family uses names affectionately. And there are lots of good options! I haven’t seen Edith mentioned yet, so I’ll try to add that to your girls list (with nickname Edie, which seems similar to both Lettie and Ada to me). I also haven’t seen anyone point out that Lettie could be short for Violet, which would give you your V initial.
I was going to say Edith too! I have an Edith and both of their girl names are ones that I love and wish I could use!
Oooo, Violet “Lettie” is perfect if they don’t mind nicknames
How about sticking to the rules but “cheating”
What about Fiona? Fi/fee…
Or any Li/Lee/Leigh name?
It may be too popular for you, but I haven’t seen Emma mentioned and it feels like a great fit with Tessa and Cora.
Please use Z initials. I don’t know how it would work for a boy, but I love Zaydie for a girl. Calling a child “Z” as a nickname is too cute.
Georgia? Where I’m from that has two syllables lol. Or Georgie for boy or girl.
Tessa, Bennett, Cora, Palmer, and Georgia
Tessa, Cora, and Georgia
Pretty cute!!
I am all in on Georgia and glad someone else suggested it!
I like the suggestion of Violet (which I pronounce Vi-let) to get you Lettie!! Brilliant solution!!
My only contribution is Vivette. Or Colette if you want to break the rules. It’s SO pretty, and it gets you to Lettie, too…!
My first thought was Vera, too!
She has the ‘a’ ending of her sisters, is not common (but still familiar: Vera Wang, anyone?), AND starts with a V (which is the Roman numeral for five). Seriously! So perfect!
For a son: Bennett, Palmer, and…
Devon
Damon
Viggo
Any of these three give you a new ending sound, are low in popularity, and start with a desirable letter. (Although, Viggo gives you that Roman numeral five!)
Please, oh, please keep us updated! Congratulations on your new little wonder.
I agree with Swistle. Sometimes rules are made to be broken.
What about Fiona (Fee)?
Leah, Leon, Leo, Leonie (Lee)
These give the same sound and still one syllable for when you’re calling out.
Gah! Just scrolled through the comments and someone literally made exactly these suggestions. Sorry!
One more that I haven’t seen mentioned:
Gabby
Some ideas..
Darcy Daphne Della Delphine / Dawson Deacon Digby Dashiell
Eva Esme Ellen Edith / Ellis Ennis Eldon Evan
Georgia Greta Gemma / Grayson Gerard Gerald Gordon
Violet / Victor Vincent
Zara Zoe
I tried to make sure these weren’t mentioned already, but I could be wrong. Some of my faves:
Essie
Effy
Elsa
Elsbeth
Dolly
Dixie
Dahlia
Daphne
Eli
Emmett
Edgar
Eamon
Edward
Easton
Graham
Garyth
Donnall
Dougall
Girls
Dahlia
Dani
Dana
Dolly
Dina
Daphne
Dixie
Delia
Darby
Elsa
Esme
Ellie
Esta
Elsbeth
Effy
Elvi
Essie
Gina
Boys
Eli
Emmett
Edward
Edmund
Edgar
Eric
Evan
Easton
Ezra
Eamon
Graham
Gavin
Griffin
Gregory
Garyth
Dawson
Darren
Dallas
Desmond
Domhnall
Darcy
Donnall
Dougal
Tessa, Bennett, Cora, Palmer and…
initials are D, E, G, V, and Z;
Delia
Della
Delta
Daphne
Demi
Elise
Ella
Ellie
Ember
Eva
Eden
Esme
Georgia
Goldie
Gracie
Gemma
Gia
Violet
Zoe
Devin
Deacon
Denver
Dalton
Declan
Dawson
Ezra
Evan
Enzo
Griffin
Grayson
Grady
Gavin
Victor
Vincent
Zion