Hello,
We can’t decide on a boy name to save our lives. My husband and I are expecting our second child in the next few weeks. This is our second child awe are waiting until delivery to know if he/she is a boy/girl. A friend had your help with naming their son a few years ago and she suggested we write you.
We have narrowed down our list (however still open to others) for each sex. Our last name is Schoenfeld pronounced “Show-in-feld”. Our first sons name is William Edward “Teddy” and we have a few names we can’t/not going to use due to neices/nephews already have those names. This include: Thomas (Tommy), James, Stephen and Andrew
As far a girls names we have come up with we have narrowed down to
Margaret Frances and call her “Francie”
Katherine Frances and call her “Kit”We are struggling to find a boy name we love, can agree on and then figuring out a dilemma with neighbors and their names.
Henry is a family name but I prefer not to call him Henry. I am happy to use in name baby’s name though. My husband’s grandfather was Fredrick “Fred” and we both are open to using as a nickname.
Boy names:
Henry “Wells” Schoenfeld
Henry Whitaker “Whit” *favorite
Henry Fredrick “Fritz”
Sullivan Henry
Henry Tate and he would go by Tate -* FavoriteThe problem with two of our boy names is that our next door neighbors have 5 kids and two of them are Tate (2.5 yrs) and Whit (7 yrs). We are friendly with them but not super close. Our children play together more than we socialize with parents Is it weird to name the baby one of the kids next door names?
Any insight would be helpful! Thank so much!!
Maggie
Do you want our input on the girl names, too, or is this a situation of “We’re all set, and at this point we’ll decide when we see her?” I’m half hoping it’s the latter, because I don’t know if I can decide between those two. Margaret is on my own list, so normally that would be my vote, but I’m not sure I can resist the appeal of Kit. Teddy and Kit! Well, but I also love Francie. Teddy and Francie! I guess in the end I would vote Margaret Frances, but it’s such a close race.
Now for boy names. If Henry Tate and Henry Whitaker are your favorites, I don’t think it’s weird that he’d share a name with the neighbor kid, especially with such an age gap (i.e., they won’t be in the same grade at school, even if these neighbors stay neighbors long-term). If I were you I would lean toward Henry Whitaker, first just because I personally prefer it, second because then he could go by Whitaker or Henry while playing with the neighbor kids, but also because it’s the larger age gap. If either Whitaker or Tate is a family name, that would be an additional point in its favor, especially since it gives you something to say to the neighbors. (If not, I would practice a light “Oh—yes, we’ve had it on our list for years! And of course your Whit/Tate just made us love it even more!”)
I also like Henry Frederick a lot. I hesitate in case he might want to go by Fred/Freddy, which rhymes with your first son’s nickname—but I don’t think rhyming nicknames is a giant issue, especially since both of them have so many other options here if they want to avoid that.
And I think Sullivan Henry is great (though I think Henry is better with the brother name and potential sister names), and Henry Wells is great, and I can see why you’re having such a hard time deciding, but I don’t think you can go wrong here. My own vote would be either Henry Whitaker called Whit or Henry Wells called Wells, with the final decision to be made depending on how much you want to avoid the neighbor situation.
Name update:
Hello!
Thanks so much for your help!
We welcomed Henry “Wells” Schoenfeld into our family on April 13th!
We used my husbands family name Henry as his first name however we are calling him Wells or as Big Brother Teddy calls him “Wellsy”.
Thanks again!
Maggie
I wonder if Whit and Tate are your favourites because you hear them aloud regularly on real children? That definitely elevates names for me, especially ones I haven’t considered before. That being said, I don’t think it’s insurmountable to have matching nicknames with the neighbour kids. I agree with Swistle I’d choose Whit to be farther from neighbour Whit’s age. Although might have to be open to having ‘Little Whit’ in your neighbour.
If you’re planning on more children and those girl names are going to stay favourites, I’d weigh whether I’d want a Whit or Kit more. I think choosing Henry Whittaker would preclude you from using Katherine Francis nn Kit. But you could always use a different nickname for her.
In the same vein I wonder what you’d call Sullivan Henry. I like it a lot, but if you’d use Van or Vannie, that would preclude Francie/Fran (at least in my humble opinion.) I love Sully, but I know that nickname isn’t for everyone because of the word association.
Even Henry Frederick ‘Fritz’ might preclude Francie in future.
I guess this novel of a response if basically saying – if you’re looking to trim your list, I’d factor in future daughter names. Save the name/nickname you love and make sure your second son’s name doesn’t clash. Of course, you’re saying you’re not sure what you’re having, so the same goes the other way – do you really want a Whit and you’d be willing to give up Kit? Then go with Margaret Francis.
Wells seems safest but I want you to choose a favourite!
Good luck! Looking forward to hearing where this one lands!
What about Kit for a boy? Christopher for a middle would get you there and it could be your nickname for boy or girl.
I was thinking that too. It’s common without being _super_ common and it’s another classic English name. Plus a Christopher nn Kit is pretty unusual in a good way imo
Re the neighbors: is their Whit a Whitaker or something else (Whitman?) Whitaker is a really unusual name, not ever in the top 1000 boy baby names since they started tracking this in 1900. I generally think kids sharing names is fine, but it would be striking to have two Whitakers next door to each other since Whitaker is so rare. Unless Whitaker is a family name I’d use something else. Tate has been steadily in the 300-400s for the past 200 years which means 700ish Tates born in the US every year. Your kids might play on a team together or something where your Tate will have to be Tate S. Not a big deal.
I like Fritz – it was on my short list. I also love the suggestion of Christopher called Kit. Henry Christopher is really nice.
20 not 200
Quick question on the girl names. Are you set on spelling it Francis with an I? That’s usually the masculine spelling, vs Frances.
Francis is a nice boy name, though. Henry Francis; Teddy and Frank.
I LOVE this – Teddy and Frank makes me heart sing.
Love Teddy and Fritz. Worry about Teddy and Freddy, Teddy and Tate. I like Teddy and Whit but I like Teddy and Kit more.
Henry Philip (Phil, Pip or Flip)
Henry Franklin (Frank)
Henry Fredrick (Hal, Hank)
Thank you so much for all your insight!! Super helpful and brought up great points I didn’t think of if we have another! (I.e Fritz and Francie), Kit and Whit).
As far as girl name goes, we are pretty certain on Margaret Frances “Francie”(must have autocorrected on my phone to Francis) or Katherine “Kit”. Definitely going to have to wait and until she is born to decide for sure!
I am fairly sure our neighbor, Whit is a Whitley, so could call our son Whitaker.
We will keep you posted!! Thanks again for all the insight.
Oh, I can edit that spelling in the post! I’ll go do that now…
If you do end up calling your child Henry instead of his middle name, Henry and Teddy sound a little bit similar. Not terribly so, but being called out on a playground or called down to dinner “Henry!” “Teddy!” they share some of the same sounds. Just something to consider.
I really like the name Sullivan! Sullivan Schoenfeld is alliterative, which could be a turn-off for you, but I think alliterative names are neat and memorable!
Instead of “Whit” you might like “Win” as a nickname for Winston, or Wynn (same pronunciation as “Win” but not a nickname for anything). These are similar to Whit, but don’t copy your neighbor at all.
These aren’t on your list, but I like Charles and Gabriel to go along with William “Teddy.”
I was going to come to say that my family knows a Whit short for William, but not how common this nickname strategy is. If others know Williams who are Whits it might make for a confusion with William Edward (Teddy) in formal situations, especially for administrators who might not know your children . If the William nn Whit that I know of is a stray Whit, it doesn’t seem like it would matter. This may be something to think about with Wells as well.
I do like Henry Fredrick nn Fritz or Fred, and Henry Christopher nn Kit a lot, and all of your names are good fun.
I like the names you have chosen and feel like you are set. If you want to keep looking for a boy both Walter and Ward remind me of Whit.
Henry Walter (Walt)
Henry Ward (Ward)
I like Francis for a boy as well (Frank).
The girl names are fabulous. I like them about equally. I keep getting ready to type I lean toward one or the other and then deleting it because I really don’t.
For the boy name, if you go with one of the neighbor names, I’d go with Tate over Whitaker just because Tate’s more common. I know no one owns a name, but if I’d used something so unusual, I might be miffed to have someone in my circle use it, too. I’d get over it, of course, but it would seem odd. I’m curious why Henry is the first name in so many of your pairings if you don’t plan to call him that. Why not use it as a middle? Wells Henry, Whitaker Henry, Tate Henry.
You could probably call a Whitaker Kit, too. It’s not all that far off from Whit and the k is there after all. *shrug* just a random idea
I love your girl names. For the boys, the thing I’d slightly worry about is an eventual “oh, it’s confusing having two Tates/ Whits next door to each other, and since it’s only your son’s MIDDLE name, let’s just call him Henry to make it easier.” If you really don’t want him called Henry.
I have a Henry nicknamed Hank in my family and I love that option for you, too. Or Henry nicknamed Hal or Harry.
Henry is a great name, but it sounds like you don’t want to call him Henry, so I’d hesitate to use that as his first name.
Sullivan Henry
Tate Henry
Frederick Henry “Freddy” “Fritz”
Henry sounds great as a middle name if you’re not keen to have it be the first name.
Henry Whitaker seems like a winner to me!
I wouldn’t worry about the neighbor kid, especially since there is a big age gap and they won’t be in the same class together at school. Definitely not worth giving up your favorite name over!
I love Katherine “Kit” along with Teddy! Frances “Frankie” would be cute for a girl too. Teddy and Kit. Teddy and Frankie
For boys, I like Henry Whitaker the best from your lists but I agree with a previous poster that you’ll need to consider the Whit vs Kit dilemma if you plan on more children. Christopher called Kit is a great suggestion too
Im not sure if you’re looking to add to your list but I do wanna say I personally think August “Gus” would be a smashing choice along with Teddy. Henry August “Gus”. Gus and Teddy 😍
This may not be your style but I did have a student named Henry who went by Huck so I’ll throw that out there too.
Some other boy suggestions that may fit your style or work with Henry:
Elliot
Jack
Miles
Lewis
Peter
John
Nathaniel “Nat” or “Nate” (since Tate is on your list)
Oh and I forgot to add: Henry Maxwell “Wells” would be a lovely choice too if you want a full name with a nickname to mirror William Edward “Teddy”. Or even Henry Maxwell “Max” is great too. Teddy and Wells. Teddy and Max.
I think all your options are lovely, but if you’re leaning towards having Henry as part of a boy name, can I suggest my absolute favourite diminutive of Henry, Hal? I LOVE it. Teddy and Hal!
I think Tate is not usable, unless it is a family name for you. In 2013 at the peak of this name’s popularity, there were 3.9 million kids born in the US. Of those 3.9M kids, 880 were named Tate that year. It would be weird for two Tates to live on the same street. It is not like two Davids or two Jacobs. Also, the style departure from William Edward to Tate is jarring.
I love the Christopher/Kit suggestions.
I think the more unusual a name is, the more peeved a parent is likely to be if you use it. I had that experience. My son’s name is fairly common (in the top 50 names) so when someone else in my social circle uses it for their baby it doesn’t bother me. I don’t feel like I have any sort of claim to the name because he’s one of so many. But one of my daughters has a name that’s very unusual (not in the top 1000, I’d never met anyone with her name before I used it). When she was a baby I used to take her to a mommy&me music class. Fast forward two years and I ran into another mom from that music class while I was out and about. I saw that she’d had another baby since we’d last seen each other in music class and when I asked the baby’s name she told me the name: my daughter’s unusual name. I made a little joke of it and said something like “Oh, you have great taste!” but she definitely seemed awkward and embarrassed to share the name with me and I’m sure she could tell I was a little taken aback. I mostly felt flattered–the name is so unusual that I can only assume she got the idea from my daughter’s name–but I also purposely picked a highly unusual name so a little part of me went “oh, darn” when I realized she’d used it, too.
All that to say, nobody has a claim to a name and if you love it far and away above all others, use it. Especially because it’s possible you won’t live by those neighbors forever. But just know that your neighbor might indeed find it weird or somewhat off-putting that you used the same name as her child’s name since I’m assuming if she named her child something as unusual as “Whit” one of her goals in naming him that was “nobody else is using this name.” (This seems like less of an issue with Tate, which is in the 300s/400s; I think that’s common enough that it’s up for grabs. Whit seems highly unusual, though.)
Girl: my favorite is Margaret Frances “Francie” because it’s after mom Maggie
Boy: Whitaker Henry called Harry or Hank
(I like how it replicates Teddy’s name as in the child goes by a nickname of his middle name.)