Hi,
My husband and I are expecting our first baby this August. I am born and raised in NC and my husband has lived in NC most of his life but his dad’s side is Italian and mom’s side Mexican. Needless to say, they aren’t used to a lot of southern traditions like the family names, double names and so on. He is more on board with them so I am not too worried about pleasing everyone except us two agreeing. I want us both to love it! I heard you were the expert, and though I know you can’t respond to every inquiry you get thought I would throw my thoughts your way and see what happened.
A family name that we both agree on is Caswell (my grandpa’s name but he goes by DC). We love Caswell for a boy and calling him “Wells”, but also love Mary Caswell for a girl because I am a sucker for a double name. My biggest fear with a double name is that it would be forced but not sure what else really goes with Caswell. My maiden name is Jackson which I have always loved for a boy until it became super popular. We both still love Jackson for a boy and calling him “Jack” but just hate there are so many of them. I like names that are different but not weird and just not a million of them.
Other family name I love (that my husband is still on the fence with) is Talbot. I would love to incorporate this into a double name for a girl but am struggling to make it work. My middle name before taking my married name was Whitworth. Another kidna strange name I would love to shorten somehow :)
In all this, I hate that we don’t love anything on my husband’s side and have asked him over and over what family names he would like to consider from his side and he has zero. I know it is up to us but feel bad (though they get the last name with all the kids ;)) His side goes from one extreme like Trinidad, his grandfatehr, to very basic David, Joe, Albert kinda thing.
Besides Caswell and Talbot we have a few “general’ names we love including Harper, Hadley and Emerson for girls. Boys I feel certain we could go with Jack or Wells just on the fence which. I think our biggest reservation to Wells is that although it is short for Caswell it seems strange to call him by a name that starts with a W when it actually starts with a C. We overthink and make everything extra complicated :)
For a little more background on names of our immediate family: my parents are Julie Ann, Jefrey Brian; brothers are Christoper Taylor and William Andrew. His parents are Rosa Alba and David Lee (his brother is the 3rd so we feel is his name to use, though he had two boys and chose not to). My husband’s full name is Eric Christian and my full maiden name was Meagan Whitworth Jackson.
To sum it all up, I guess my main help request would be help on double names for girls and maybe how else to incorporate Caswell or Talbot in a feminine way and the etiquette or normalcy of how to shorten boy names like Wells. I love how unique Talbot is though my husband thinks it sounds like a 90 year old :)The biggest catch all to any name we like that is kinda weird traditional is our last name is Bourgeois…so feel like a lot doesn’t sound well with it. Sounds like “boozh-wah”
I know that is a lot of information thrown out more so than one general question but would love your ideas if you have time! We find out in about a month the gender and would love to have a boy and girl name settled for that day :) Thanks so much!
Meagan Jackson Bourgeois
While a majority of nicknames come from the beginning of a name, there is also a nice large group coming from the middle or end:
Margaret/Greta
Virginia/Ginny
Anthony/Tony
Elizabeth/Beth
Elizabeth/Liz
Elizabeth/Libby
Albert/Bert
Robert/Bert
Alexander/Xander
Veronica/Ronni
Victoria/Tori
Penelope/Nell
Olivia/Livvy
Charlotte/Lottie
Andrew/Drew
Rebecca/Becky
Aubrey/Bree
Eleanor/Nora
Genevieve/Evie
Angus/Gus
Whenever a name/nickname combination is an unfamiliar one, I think it can be harder to make it stick: if you want a Benjamin called Ben, that’s not hard; if you want a Benjamin called Jamie, or a Ruben called Ben, that’s going to be a tougher sell. I think if you were asking about naming him Maxwell and calling him Wells, I’d put that in the “tough sell” category, because the Maxwell/Max combination is so familiar; because I’m not familiar with Caswell, I would find it easier to go with Wells. I could also see him going by Cas (I’m pronouncing that S as a Z), which seems like a pretty cool nickname.
I too am a sucker for a double name, and I love both Mary Caswell and Mary Talbot. How hard it will be to pull that off will depend heavily on the naming culture where you live—and it sounds like it’s a good one for that. In my area, double names are extremely rare; the assumption, I think, would be that Caswell or Talbot was the surname. “Hello, this is my daughter Mary Talbot!” “Hello, Mary!” But even in my area, I think with a little extra effort and preemptive explaining I could make it work for at least the elementary years.
The Mary double name seems most familiar, but I think Sarah would be nice too: Sarah Caswell, Sarah Talbot.
It is unfortunate that your maiden name has become too common for your tastes, because one of my very favorite things in the whole naming world is when the mother’s maiden name works as a child’s first name. If I were you I think I’d use it, but then I’d look for every opportunity to mention that it was my maiden name.
Whitworth would make a very appealing middle name for either a boy or a girl, especially since it used to be your middle name. Or Worth is one of the few virtue names for boys, though I don’t think I’d pair it with Bourgeois.
If you use first names from your side, and the surname from your husband’s side, I think it would be nice if it works out to use middle names from his side—unless he actively doesn’t want to honor people. That is, there’s a difference between “Meh, I don’t have strong feelings about any of the honor names from my side” and “I don’t want ANY of those people honored”/”I don’t want to use any of those names.” If he’s the former, I’d suggest choosing any name that sounds nice enough with the first name. Mary Talbot Rosa Bourgeois, Jackson Eric Bourgeois, etc.
Name update!
Hi,
I wrote you earlier this year about Baby Bourgeois. Since then we have found out it is baby GIRL Bourgeois. We have also since decided on the name Anna Talbot Bourgeois, going by Anna Talbot. We just loved the idea of a double name and after many discussions and suggestions settled on what we loved although many don’t seem to get the purpose of a southern double name. A lot of opinions on the blog also thought our last name sounded pretintious but we cannot change that :) so decided to stick with using the family name Talbot we highly considered for a girl and loved Anna with it. We did love the double name suggestions for a girl using the family name Caswell also but that is still our top baby boy name so decided to save that one for a possible future boy :) We enjoyed reading all of the considerations and suggestions! Anna Talbot will be here mid August!
I love Mary Talbot or Mary Caswell. Would it be easier if it was hyphenated?
Mary-Caswell (middle name) Bourgeois
I also like Talbot for a boy. Tal is a great nickname. Wells is cool too.
First of all, I want to make sure you’re familiar with the mainstream definition of bourgeois. Since it’s your husband’s name originally, it may not have been a significant vocabulary term to you back when you were studying vocabulary lists, but it basically means middle class and sometimes gets used in a kind of negative way either in contrast to good, honest working class folk or to sophisticated rich people. Knowing that might effect which kinds of first names you want to use…for example, if my last name was Rich that would probably rule out Diamond or Monee as a first name in my opinion.
Besides that, I think Caswell sounds awesome with Wells as a nickname. I also kind of wonder what the chances are of a man being Italian and Mexican and having no variants of Mary in his family tree. I also think Talbot Rose would be a pretty double name…although admittedly I’m not Southern and so I might not have the conventions down. Any chance you’d use the nickname Tallie? I personally think that would be great, and would reserve Talbot for a girl for that reason.
Love seeing letters from fellow Southerners (especially another NC-er), with all our crazy naming traditions.
I love Talbot for a boy or girl — my dad is actually from a town in Tennessee called Talbott! For a girl, I think Talbot could easily be made into a double name by shortening Talbot to Tallie, like an earlier commenter suggested. Tallie Rose, Tallie Kay, Tallie Jane. That also might make it sound less 90-year-old-ish to your husband!
I was going to suggest a similar idea to the above comments, but with Caswell: use it as a first, with a second name after. For example, Caswell Louise… Cassie Lou. Cassie Ann, Cassie Rose, Cassie June, etc. Or Caswell Elizabeth, is Cassie Beth.
Using Caswell second for a girl is great too, and shortening it there to ___ Cass gives you more pairing options. Mary Cass, Emma Cass, Vera Cass, Lucy Cass.
Caswell/Wells for a son is very cool, too.
I think Caswell or Talbot could be first names and would consider pairing with a J middle (or second first) name to make a CJ or TJ nickname possible. Jackson is an obvious choice, or go with Joseph/Josephine/Josefina/etc. for the Joe on your husband’s side.
also wanted to add Julie and Jefrey for your parents as possibilities!
Plus, Rose as a middle with Caswell or Talbot sound really nice and would honor the baby’s grandma. Cassie Rose or Tallie Rose sound really cute, though I think I prefer Caswell.
I think Caswell would definitely work – One of the characters in The 100 is/was named Wells.
Hm.. random idea for husbands side: Alba + Lee = Albee? Caswell Albee Bourgeois.
I also think Caswell nn. Cas would work nicely for a girl.
You could always do the “name reveal” instead of “gender reveal” — decide to name him/her Caswell and reveal that.. keep the gender a surprise!
Soooo random, but I actually went to college with your husband, Meagan! (totally off subject) I think all of the names that you are considering are adorable. I, too, LOVE a double name and think that Mary Caswell and Mary Talbot are adorable. Caswell, and call him Wells, is my favorite though! I think that you guys have a great name pool and just have to figure out how you want to use them. In the end, finding out the gender may help you decide… :)
I wanted to reiterate what Kerry said above about your surname Bourgeois… I would be careful about pairing an unusual name with that surname because it could sound a bit pretentious. I’m not particularly a fan of Talbot Bourgeois for a boy, I do think it sounds a bit upper crust & stuffy. I like it for a girl though! I think the fact that it sounds a little boyish makes it cooler for a girl. And I LOVE Tallie as a nickname! I have the same concern with Caswell Bourgeois and even the nickname Wells Bourgeois. I like it much better with the nickname Cas though.
Mary sounds like quite an outlier for name style for you for girl names so I might be careful with using it if you plan to have more children. A sibset of Mary and Emerson/Hadley/Harper seems like an unusual pairing.
Have you considered Alba as an honor name from your husband’s side? I think it’s so great for a girl!
Have you considered just Caswell for a girl? I think the name Cassie could work for Caswell. This could work if you decide you don’t want to do a double name, or if you do Mary Caswell but wanted her to have a nickname.
I also think Mary Talbot (or just Talbot) could work with Tallie (tal-ee) or Talia as nicknames.
For boys, I do like Caswell. Wells works just fine, I don’t think anyone will think its odd or find it hard to remember. If you really want the nickname to start with the same initial, I like Swistle’s suggestion of Cas/Caz. Cass could also work.
Whitworth was originally a British place names that translated to something along the lines of white woods. The worth (woods) element is kind of tricky to work with, but the Whit element has some options. For a girl, perhaps you’d like Whitney? I’ve also heard of Whitaker being used as a name for boys, with Whit as the nickname, so I don’t see why Whitworth shouldn’t work.
As most have said above…. I love Caswell and Talbot both!! And I also think that both names could work for both a boy or a girl!
I LOVE Caswell with shortened name Wells. If it were up to me, I would stop here. Done. Love it!! Although, I do also think Talbot is a really cool name with the nn Tal.
I love the above suggestions of using Caswell and Talbot both for a girl name, although I’m from Canada not NC and don’t know what would acceptable in your area for naming or not (up here, it’s pretty much anything goes). I can’t decide which name I prefer more for the girl name, Talbot or Caswell.
I think Mary Caswell works quite nicely, although I think I would even be more bold (especially if you aren’t 100% sold on the “mary” portion of it) and use Caswell as the first of the two names. Caswell Julie or Caswell Rose (nods to family members). Cassie or Callie or Calla could even work as shortened names.
I also really like Talbot. You could go with Talbotte or Talbott to make it look a bit more feminine, but I don’t think you would need to do that. Tallie or Talia could be used as shortened names. You could do Talbot Rosa or any other girl name you prefer on the end to make it a double name. Rosa Talbot is also very beautiful. Wow… ok, Rosa Talbot might be favourite – just the looks and the sound of it are very classic but meaningful.
Good luck! I love the uniqueness but for a good reason! I think you can pull a lot of more common nicknames out of each which tend to make it feel less-out-there.
I could see Whitworth working well as a girl name. I have a friend whose middle name is Magregor, a family name, and she goes by Maggie. A familiar nickname from an untraditional source. Whitworth nn Whit would be cute on a girl: a spunky choice that puts a twist on the more common Whitney. You could even use it for a boy, though I’m not sure if Whit is more associated with girls because of Whitney.
I’m obsessed with the name Wells!!! I really want to use just that for a boy. I think it’s a awesome nickname for Caswell.
Me too! We were initially considering Maxwell nn Wells but were so hesitant that we would never get around Max… so thought, ok… why not just use Wells?? It’s definitely on our short list if we have another boy. Just love it!
I love the nickname Wells for your boy name Caswell! Cas is also a great nickname, but I like Wells the most. :) I also really love Caswell and Talbot for a girl, with Callie or Tallie as nicknames. Tallie Rose, Tallie Ann, Cassie Ann, Cassie Rose, or possibly even Calla Rose. If you went with Whitworth (I think it would be a great boy name!), perhaps spell the nickname with two Ts (Whitt) to make it a little more masculine?
I meant to say Cassie not Callie. :)
I think Callie also works though!
Jackson Bourgeois is my favorite name for a boy for you because it was your maiden name. I like the nickname Jack. I also love Whitworth Bourgeois. Initially, I was worried that Whitworth Bourgeois sounded too pretentious, but by the time I had said it three times, I was in love with it. Whit is a totally usable, everyday nickname. Jack and Whit would work really well as brothers’ names and I love that they would both have a connection to you.
With such similar sounds between Talbot and Rosa’s middle name Alba, I’d feel inclined to try to push the given name as Talbot and use the nickname Alba for that. I can imagine this idea blowing my husband’s mind, so I don’t know if it would work for your family. As others have suggested, Tallie and Cassie work as nicknames for the family names you are considering.
I wanted to point out that Harper, Hadley and Emerson would fall into the Last Names as First Names Category for me. If it was me, I’d toss out the double name idea and just simply use family last names as first names. Talbot Whatever-Middle-Hubs-Likes Bourgeois (Perhaps Talbot Louise? – Tallie Lou) or Caswell Whatever-Middle-Hubs-Likes Bourgeois (Caswell Rose? – Cassie Rose). If you and your husband feel the need to soften the girls names and a double name is best, then I think simple is the way to go. I like Jane Talbot Bourgeois. Anna Caswell sounds nice too.
What a great list of possible family names. I can’t wait to hear what you finally decide on.
If you don’t go with a double name, I like Talby as a nod to or nickname for Talbot.
I just wanted to add my own vote of appreciation for Caswell nn Wells on a boy. Love it!
I actually think Jackson’s popularly is a good thing for you with your last name. I will echo what Kerry and Laura said about having to be careful with your last name and seeming pretentious. I love your choices, but sadly I think they come off as too fussy when used as a first with your last name. As a middle, you can still call him Cas or Wells or Talbot but it would give him a little more flexibility with first impressions.
My favorite for a boy would be Jackson Caswell Bourgeois. Seems like a little southern gentleman :)
I think all of your girl options are right on. I especially like Harper, Hadley and Mary, paired with either Meagan or Talbot as a middle.
BTW, I have a friend Benjamin who goes exclusively by Jamie and hasn’t had any issue with it. I think it’s fine to use what ever part of the name you like as a nickname.
Mary Talbot clashes to me. I also have an association with the department store Talbot’s, which always sounded like “Tall Butts” to me as a kid. Buuut maybe that’s just me.
What about Talia instead? Tali is a nice nickname or stand-alone name.
I do like Caswell with nickname Wells or Cas (“caz”) a lot. For a girl, you could use Cassandra or Cassidy.
You could also go with Whitney, although that may be too 80s/90s at this point.
Love another fellow NCer letter! I love Caswell nn Wells – love! I went to UNC with a guy who went by Wills (William III) & I loved it. Very similar (especially when said with a NC accent).
I would stay away from Jack/Jackson in NC. It is so popular! My son is 4.5 & it it literally the two names we hear most often & the name most repeated in our 3-5yr old friend group.
With your surname evoking the upper middle class rich, I agree with other commenters that a surname as a first name brings out that distinction even more. I wonder if it is possible to find a name that transcends all classes of society? I think the name Charles might work. It has been used from kings and aristocrats, down to the common man. Plus it has a lot of letters in common with Caswell. I actually quite like the sound of Charles Caswell Bourgeois.
For a girl, instead of Jackson would you consider Jacqueline? Or even Mary-Jacqueline?
The name Mary Talbot seemed familiar so I googled it and it turns out there was a Mary Talbot who was a noble woman and rival of Anne Boleyn. Not that it matters, just worth knowing about.
Good luck.
I like something more whimsical and unique than Mary with your last name. I really like Willa Caswell and Rose Talbot. Emerson also seems whimsical and I might go with Mary Emerson as a double name with either Mary Em or Emmie as a nickname.
Jackson would be a fine middle name for a boy – Wells Jackson seems more direct than trying to get there from Caswell. I also like Whit Eric as an option. But with your last name, my favorite of your options is Jack. It seems to ground your last name a bit.
I love both Caswell and Talbot, but with your surname, I prefer them as middle names for either a boy or girl. For a boy, I like the idea of using your maiden name. I hope the family connection to Jackson outweighs the current popularity of the name because both Jackson Talbot Bourgeois and Jackson Caswell Bourgeois sound wonderful. I also like Christian Whitworth Bourgeois for a boy.
For a girl, I like the ‘different, but not weird’ family names. I especially like Alba and think it fits in well with names you generally like, such as Harper and Emerson. I also agree with a previous poster that that Mary seems like an outlier to your naming style for girls. I love the following girl name options for you:
Alba Juliet
Alba Caswell
Anna Caswell
Anna Talbot
Willa Caswell
Christa Talbot
Christa Whitworth
My favorite options for you are Jackson Talbot and Christian Whitworth for boys and Alba Juliet for a girl. Good luck and happy name hunting!
I actually have a friend (female mid 20s) named Talbot who goes by Tallie. There’s also a woman in town who goes by Talbot. So totally doable for a girl.
I like Caswell (nn Wells) for a boy. Jackson could be a good middle for Caswell or another name. I don’t imagine the popularity would bother you as much in a middle. It might also be fun to call him CJ since your grandfather also goes by initials. For a girl Mary Caswell works. Or how about Caroline Caswell, Grace Caswell, or Rose Caswell?
Hmm, I’m with the others who think Bourgeois being a word (with a less-than-totally-positive meaning) should be a consideration. I think you should avoid anything too “fancy” or “rich” sounding. These are arbitrary categories with no certain definitions– but to me Caswell Bourgeois kind of pushes the limit. I’d lean towards very stable, down-to-earth names with comfortable, unpretentious nicknames. I loved the suggestion of Charles. Charlie Bourgeois is great. Or:
Edward– Ned, Ed, Ted
Adam
Theodore– Ted, Theo
Andrew
I also think Jackson fits the bill, and it’s worth overlooking the popularity of it.
I’d also be tempted by either of your brother’s names. William and Christopher both compliment Bourgeois and make it seem much more down to earth.
I’m also from the South and in my neck of the woods, I have seen double names on girls that definitely emulate what you are going for. I knew a little girl named Fraser Faith (middle name) (last name) so I think a surname in the front spot is definitely doable, especially with something like Caswell and Talbot where nickname potential is high (Cassie, Tallie, etc). I also know a lady my age named M@riharden, so another interesting way to deal with the double first name….she named her little girls M@riclay and Luciell@. (sorry for the @ but I’m paranoid using these unique names!)
I love your final decision of Anna Talbot, gorgeous!
I love your final decision and I just wanted to offer my opinion in support of whatever name you choose without regard for the meaning of your last name. It’s not like you’re naming your child Stinky and your last name is Poop. These are all beautiful family names and you really can’t go wrong!
I live in SC but am originally from NY state and I have encountered many double names. I think they are adorably classy and beautiful, especially when I hear of the thoughtful family ties.