A. writes:
My husband and I desperately need some help. Our last name is (R)othwell, and we are having our first child, a baby boy, due July 31st. Yes, that is 3 short weeks away!
We are really struggling with finding a first name. The middle name we chose is Steven, after my husband. I know you recommend not choosing a middle name first, but it is kind of a tradition on my husband’s side.
We do have a few names we agree on, but none we love. We can’t even get to a stage where we argue on them. Here are the ones we like currently:
Brady
Brenner
BriceThere is absolutely no reason why those all start with the letter B, just a weird coincidence. In fact, I am a little worried that if we choose one of those, his initials will be BSR. Is that bad? Will kids call him a bull-sh*t-er? Or am I over-thinking that?
As for the above names, is Brady too popular? I don’t know any personally, but I think it’s pretty high up on the popularity charts. And I really like the name Brice, but I’m just not sure if its right for us; I can’t picture myself saying it. Then there’s Brenner, which I have only ever heard of once. Is that okay? My hard rules for a name include that it be easy to spell if heard, and easy to say if read. Does it pass your uncommon name test?
Other names we have liked but discarded for one reason or another:
Micah
WyattWe actually like Wyatt, but I feel like if my son had a lisp, this could be an issue – Wyatt (R)othwell = Wyatt Wothwell…what do you think? I am staying away from all W names and all R names for the same reason, they just seem harder to say correctly. For example, Reed (R)othwell = Weed Wothwell with a lisp. And no, neither of us have a lisp, so I don’t know why I worry about it so much. As for Micah, I don’t like the nickname Mike, so I worry people will shorten it to that. Thus, I took it off our already short list. Plus, it seems to be a girl name, too, of which I’m not a big fan.
If we had a girl, the choices for her first and middle names would be:
Leila Ritchie
Leila Marie
Malia RitchieI am from Hawaii, though we live on the mainland now. I seem to only like girl Hawaiian names. These are easier to say and spell than many boy ones, so that’s probably why. Also, Ritchie is a family surname on my husband’s side.
Overall, we are avoiding really traditional names, and really uncommon ones (no Apple here). I also feel like we shouldn’t choose a first name that ends in an -en, -on, -an, etc, because of the middle name Steven. Do you agree? Meanings aren’t super important to us. I am not drawn to feminine boy names either. I do realize that I am sounding extremely picky, but I don’t want us to make the wrong choice! We plan on having two children.
Thank you so much for your help, I’m starting to panic since we haven’t been able to make a decision yet. The due date is so soon! Looking forward to seeing your suggestions.
When I read this the first time, I got to the part about the initials BSR and I thought, “Oh, I wonder if that’s a band or a brand or something?”—and then I got to “bull-sh*t-er” and STILL didn’t see it. Then, I had the letter in my name-blog spreadsheet, and I’d noted “BSR initials a problem?”—and I couldn’t remember what the problem was without re-reading the email. So I’d scratch that worry off the list.
I think I would also scratch off the worry about lisps, if you can: there would be so many speech impediments to allow for, and a child saying his own name wrong is a huge crowd-pleaser. If the name feels hard to say even without a speech impediment, though, I might cross it off.
I’d take the “ending in N” issue on a case-by-case basis; some combinations might sound bad to you, and others might sound good.
Brady is a moderately popular name: it was the 136th most popular boy name in the United States in 2012, and the popularity of the name Brayden/Braden may make Brady feel more common. Brady and Braden are falling in popularity; Brayden was steadily rising until 2011, and took its first little dip in 2012. It doesn’t seem too popular to me; I did a quick survey of the children currently at home, and only one of the three knew a Brady.
The name Brenner is very uncommon: only 64 new baby boys were given the name in 2012. It seems easy to spell and pronounce, and I’d think it would fit in well with other surname names.
Similar to Brady are Brody and Grady and Cade. I like Grady best: Grady Steven (R)othwell.
Similar to Brenner are Turner and Tanner and Connor and Carter. I like Turner best: Turner Steven (R)othwell.
Similar to Wyatt are Beckett and Bennett and Everett and Emmett and Garrett and Brett. I like Everett best: Everett Steven (R)othwell. But all the -tt names are a little hard for me to say with (R)othwell.
Similar to Brice are Blake and Brooks and Brett.
I don’t know if a Micah would be called Mike. I’ve only known two, both adults, and hadn’t thought of Mike as a nickname for them. It’s like Davis, for me: Dave OUGHT to be a perfectly naturally nickname for it, and certainly if I knew a Micah/Davis who went by Mike/Dave I would think that seemed understandable—and yet I never thought of Mike/Dave as nicknames for Micah/Davis until someone pointed out that they could be. Micah might rule out Malia later on, however.
I know young brothers named Brice (or maybe Bryce — the more usual way to spell the name) and Blake and like both of those name, especially Blake. Blake Steven (R)othwell would be a fine name. (The 10 year old Blake I know is Blake Austin R…. [two syllable English surname also].)
The BSR issue also never occurred to me. Even after I read your whole question, it still took a minute. So no, I don’t think it’s going to be a huge issue.
Of your short list, I like Brenner the best. It is uncommon, but doesn’t seem “made up” at all. The only spelling issue I can even think of would be maybe people asking it it was one N or 2-but that’s really very minor I think. If the fact it is used so little continues to bother you, I like Swistle’s suggestion of Bennett. Brennan & Brendan also seem very similar.
I like Micah and have known a few. None have ever been called Mike.
I also wouldn’t be too worried about your child having a lisp. Fact is, all kids struggle with certain sounds when they are little. I see Malia is on your list-a 2 year is likely to say that as Mah-we-ah, but she’d grow out of it. My son William was called Wee-um by his friends until they were about 3 or 4, and then they grew out of it. No big deal.
I’ve known a few Micah’s and have never heard them called Mike. I really like Brenner, it is easy to pronounce and spell, yet still feels pretty unusual. I think my favorite is Grady Steven.
I’ve never known a Micah to be called Mike, either. Also, that’s an easy one to fix if someone did it – you just smile and say, “We call him Micah.” I do not see any correlation between the initials B-S-R and the phrase that concerns you. Also, it’s rare for kids to go by all three initials, especially among other kids. And yes, all kids’ names are mispronounced at some point by someone. My first cousin couldn’t say the sound /sh/ and had a first and last name that started that way (think “Cheryl Shuman” for example) . When she said it, her name sounded like it started with /h/ (“Heryl Human”) until she grew out of it. It was very endearing.
We have family members between the age of 3-5 named Brody and Brady and also know another 5 year old named Blake. All good names.
The BSR thing didn’t register for me, so I wouldn’t worry about it. I had a lisp when I was little and it was no big deal, other than getting matched with a goofball mentor in pre-k when I said it was sunny out, but it sounded like I said it was “funny” out. Man, I remember being the MOST pissed off 4 year old. But in reality, a little speech therapy in kindergarten and it was no big.
Of your list I like Brenner best with Steven. I think it sounds current, but isn’t common, but since it’s a surname it also doesn’t read as super trendy. Basically it wins all around in the name game lottery. I also like Wyatt with the middle and last names and don’t think too much about the lisp-potential.
I didn’t see a problem with the initials until you spelled it out. I like Brady and Brice best of your front runners. Brice is often spelled Bryce, so you might have to clarify if you used that one.
Micah is a big favorite of mine. I think Mike would be easy enough to avoid.
I liked Grady, Carter, and Brooks from Swistle’s suggestions.
I’m throwing in another vote for Brenner out of your current choices. But the suggestion of Grady is really cute! Grady Steven melts my heart a little. Some combinations do that to me…and Grady Steven is one of them.
For what it’s worth, I think the letter writer is reading BSR more like BS-er, as in one who BSes (using the letters pronounced like bee-ess-er, if that makes sense). I still don’t think it’s an issue though, and the chance of your son’s classmates knowing his initials and coming to that conclusion is unlikely. Personally, I like Grady or Bryce. Or Bryson.
I love Brenner and Grady but I have a problem picturing them on grown up- they’re just a little too “cute” for me. However, I love Wyatt. I don’t think you should worry about your child potentially having a lisp- you just can’t plan for something like that.
Wyatt Steven (R)othwell- love it!
Brenner (R)othwell runs together too much for me and ends up sounding more Brenner Othwell. I do like Bennett or Beckett or Blake or Brice (though I prefer Bryce). Not sure why I’m drawn to the Bs either!
I agree about Brenner running into Rothwell due to the first name ending & surname beginning both with R. I was going to make the same comment myself. I love Grady (although for some reason this always reminds me of gravy), Brady, Wyatt, Blake and Bryce. I think if you’re concerned about easy spellings, you may run into some trouble if you spell it Brice… people will think you made up the spelling to be different or unique and it will probably be misspelled all the time.
Blake Steven (R)othwell is a great name! I would also like to suggest Branson. I know it ends in an “n” as well but I think it sounds pretty good.
Branson Steven (R)othwell nn Bran. Branson Rothwell is awsome!
If you both really like Wyatt though, and I do too, I don’t think the whole “R, W” thing is really anything to worry about. The chances of that happening is pretty low and, if it does, will probably only be when your son is young and first learning to talk.
All the best!
Brenner R.. runs into each other too much for my liking, but what about Brennan? Brennan R.. doesn’t have that r-R issue. Or Bennett?
Brendan and Blake are also really nice. If you’re not sure about Brice, would Bryson work for you?
Wyatt is also very usable, I wouldn’t worry about a possible lisp.
As for your question about Micah, I’ve not heard anyone named Micah be called Mike. Micah R.. has a very nice ring to it.
In general, I’m fussy about initials — that is, I don’t like it if the initials suggest something embarrassing, and I would reject a name if there were. However, like Swistle and several other commenters, I didn’t see any problem with BSR, and even after I read the explanation, had a several-second pause before I saw the connection to the initials. When I look at the initials again, now, I still get no connection to anything at all, except that they look like great initials.
I think Steven sounds very nice as a middle name. My favorite combinations are Grady Steven and Brenner Steven.
My husband and I just moved from Hawaii back to the mainland. I know you had said that you seem to not like boy Hawaiian names but what about Malakai with a nn of Kai, or Kanoa with a nn of Noah. Since he will have your husband’s last name, and the middle name is from your husband too it might be nice to keep women of the Hawaiian ties there as well.
My favourite is Wyatt but if that is no longer in the running, I would say Brady. Even if Brenner and Brice aren’t made-up/alternative spellings, that would still be my initial thought. Since neither of you love the names you can agree on, starting from scratch might not be such a bad idea. Here are some suggestions:
Toby
Zac
Noah
Arlo
Ben
Jude
Beau
If you like Brice (I would spell it Bryce), would you like Royce? I feel like that is an underused, beautiful boy name. Royce Steven (R)othwell. Or how about Brandon or Bruce? If you like the “y” sound in Bryce and Wyatt, what about Ryan or Kyle or Tyler?
As someone who way overthinks names – honey, you are WAY overthinking them! I don’t see a single concern that I’d consider a legitimate issues. Swistle did a good job explaining (i.e. don’t worry about the lisp – don’t give your child a disability before they get here!), Mike isn’t a natural/common nickname for Micah, etc. I actually love Steven as a first name with most of those as middle names, but Wyatt and Micah are probably my two faves!
I like Brenner really well, but I think a bigger problem than the first and middle names both ending in “n” is the first name ending with the same letter the last name starts with, which would be the case with Brenner (R)othwell. The sounds run together – it might sound like “Brenner Othwell” if people didn’t take extra care to separate the names. Brenner makes me think of Brendan, which does of course end in “n” like Steven, but I don’t really think that should be a major issue. First and middle names aren’t said out loud very often in most cases, and I don’t think Brendan Steven (R)othwell sounds bad – I think Brendan (R)othwell actually sounds great! If the “n” thing continues to bug you, though, I further support Swistle’s suggestions of Bennett and Beckett.
The BSR thing never would have occurred to me. And I wouldn’t plan around a hypothetical future speech impediment, especially since there doesn’t seem to be any evidence that he will have one.
Wyatt is my favorite with your surname, in sound, look & also feel. Wyatt (R)othwell is just so distinguished and ruggedly handsome. Using the “boyfriend of daughter” test, what would be my kneejerk reaction if my (future) daughter announced she had a boyfriend named Wyatt (R)othwell? My initial reaction would be great!
Grady reminds me of gravy unfortunately…something about the “r” running into your surname amplifies it. If you are worried about lisping or pronunciation problems, Grady, Brady, Brenner, Bryce are all much worse with (R)othwell to my ear.
I like Micah and have never met one called Mike.
What about Levi, Ezekiel (nn Zeke), Zachariah (nn Zack), Abraham, Asa, Gideon… I guess Levi Steven is a little sing-songy but I love Levi with your surname.
I really like the way Eli (R)othwell sounds too. It gives me a similar stylistic feel to Wyatt (R)othwell. Elijah Steven (R)othwell?