Kacie writes:
Long time reader here! My husband and I are expecting our 2nd child, a girl, in October. Our first born is Eli Schwarz. Our last name sounds like Ingamann- only starts with a E. Our dilemma is fairly simple and basically boils down to cold feet on my part! We have 2 names that we like and had been on our list the first time when we had our son. However now that we actually know its a girl, I am hesitant. My husband on the other hand is convinced!
His pick is Mills Margaret – Margaret being a family name and Mills just being a name we like the sound of. I knew a girl in childhood with this name and made the suggestion not knowing he would love it! I do love this name however I wonder if I will get the hairy eyeball from relatives and general public if I use this name because its fairly obscure. Also, Mills being surname in style and Eli more traditional and biblical. Is this an issue?
The second option is Isla Rae. We both like this name as well, however it has become the runner up because I felt like it sounded too similar to Eli. Now I’m reconsidering it because I think maybe this is a easier name for a little girl, as well as more socially acceptable.
Thoughts? Should we go with Mills because we like and hope everyone gets on board? Or the more traditional Isla even though her sibling is similar sounding Eli?
Thanks for your help!
The name Mills is very unusual: in 2012, the Social Security Administration reports there were 20 new baby boys named Mills; it’s not in the data base at all for girls that year. Because it’s so unusual, I do think part of the package deal of this name would be dealing with reactions—but surname names are in fashion right now, so many of the reactions may be quite positive. One option if you think the name would not go over well in your circle would be to use it as a nickname for Milly/Millie or Millicent or Camilla or Romilly or Amelia or Emeline. (Amelia and Emeline might be too similar to Eli.) Or you could name her Margaret Mills Ingamann and call her Mills.
I think in general it’s fine to have a style gap between the boy names and girl names in a family. Are you planning to have more children? I would want to think ahead to make sure I could think of a few good sister name options for a second girl.
I think Mills Margaret is a very appealing name, and Mills Margaret Ingamann sounds great to me. Mills Ingamann works somewhat less well: not only does it sound significantly less feminine without the Margaret, but also I get Milzinga Man—but maybe that doesn’t happen with the actual surname, or maybe you would often call her Mills Margaret (I find I immediately want to, because it’s so pleasing to say). And in general I think it’s not a deal-breaker if names merge a bit, as long as they don’t make a negative word or name: I think everyone just gets used to putting a tiny half-pause between the first name and the surname.
To my ear, Eli and Isla are too similar. When I say them out loud, they sound as if they’re mirror images of each other, even though they aren’t quite, and my tongue gets tangled. I also wonder again about future siblings, if you’re planning more children: it seems like after Eli and Isla, it would be hard to find a third name that was neither too similar nor too different.
Oh my gosh, I love Mills!! It is a name I have never heard/thought of, but immediately found to be adorable and spunky and endearing. Paired with a classic mn like Margaret gives it even more of a green light, in my book. I also find Isla and Eli to be too similar. Mills! Mills! Mills!
I love Mills! Giving her an unusual name will mean that you have to explain it to every new person you meet, but it becomes a fun story to tell and Mills is easy to say and spell so once people hear it once, they won’t mess it up. And I agree with Swistle, I would want to call her Mills Margaret all the time, because it is such an awesome combination. I love it when middle names inspire you to use them more often!
I, too, would urge you toward Mills but I do think a longer name would be nice. Eli and Camille (nn Mills) would be a great combo, I think. They share so many letters and sounds, but not in a too-close way, like Isla.
A character in one of my favorite books is Himillsy Dodd and Mills would be a great, clear nickname for that if you like it.
I like Mills, but think it’s cute as a nickname for Camille. When we had our children (Maxwell and Vivian), we introduced them to everyone and called them Max and Vivi, and it is extremely rare now that anyone calls them by their full names… just the occasional new teacher, etc. When someone asks their names, I simply say Max and Vivi, just as you could simply say ‘Mills’ or ‘Mills – short for Camille’. I like that they do have the option of using the longer name if they choose to at some point. Good luck!
Like Swistle, I find that it is difficult to know where the first name ends and last name begins with Mills Ingamann (when spoken aloud). I think we tend to write names a lot when choosing them, and on paper this one is beautiful. However, I imagine introducing myself as Mills Ingamann, and I find that I have to pause rather dramatically between the two to distinguish them. I have had a lifetime of experience with this, because my first and last names are unusual, so I wanted to chime in. Best of luck!
mills! mills margaret! go. for. it.
killer: )
Thanks for your enthusiasm! I appreciate it!
I keep saying Ela and Isla whenever I try to say Eli and Isla, so I would vote no for Isla.
Thought I’d weigh in as I faced a similar question as the second part of your letter. We, too, have an Eli. When it came time to name our daughter, I was struck by the name Ivy. But was it too similar? They do mirror each other, even more so than Eli and Isla. How would we find a third or forth name if we had more children?
In the end, we did name her Ivy. The sibling set is too sing-songy for some but the longer we considered, the more it became clear that it is her name. It just IS. She’s Ivy. She isn’t any of the runner up names. And to name her something else because right now her only sibling has a similar sounding name? It felt like we’d be doing her a disservice. She deserves to have the name we loved most for her.
Also, if we have more, I can always introduce them as Eli, Jasper/Clara/Whathaveyou and Ivy.
All that being said, it sounds to me that you love Mills more than Isla. I think you should use your first choice name for the same reasons we used Ivy. If it feels like the one, go for it!
Mills Margaret is such a fun name!! Just love it. Even though I think you would have to explain it, half the fun of naming a baby is telling the story of how you got the name!
Eli & Isla are too similar I think. However, I hesitate to cast my vote for Mills. I’m not crazy about the way it sounds with the last name (kind of all runs together).
But most importantly, is Mills really your “style” for girl names? Eli & Isla make me wonder if Mills isn’t an outlier for you. What other girl names have you considered? If everything on your longer list for a girl is traditional and feminine like Isla, then perhaps you should pass on Mills as a given name. If you have lots of other unisex sounding surname as firsts on your longer girl list, then Mills seems like a better fit.
If your girl style is really names more like Isla, I really like Swistle’s suggestion of using Mills as a nickname for a more traditional feminine name. In addition to the great suggestions you’ve already received, I’ll add Milena. Or for something similar to in feel to Isla but not so close to Eli, maybe Iris, Ivy or Esme.
This! Yes! Well said. I feel like it’s a great style departure from Eli and I would really think about what other girl names I would like to be a sibling for Mills. Eli, Sarah and Mills would be shocking. Eli, Sloane and Mills is a nicer fit. If you find you don’t like other names like Mills, I think using it as a nickname for a more traditional name is very, very cute!
Eli and Isla are too close for me. I get so tongue twisted just saying it in my mind, and I don’t even have to say it all day long for 18 years! I think it’d be weary for a parent, but that’s up to you to decide. (I actually think Ivy is nice and seems easier to say with Eli because the ‘V’ distinguishes the names more than the ‘L’ in Eli and Isla.)
Good luck!
I vote for Camilla nn Mills – super cute, but I like having the feminine name to fall back on.
Like many others I think Eli and Isla are probably too close. I liked the idea of using Mills as a nickname. Amelia Margaret would be my choice.
I like the idea of Mills as a nickname, but not as a full name–even if Margaret is in there as a first or middle name. Imagine your child grown up, working in a business atmosphere. If she sends an e-mail from “Mills” it’s going to look like a guy. As someone who’s dad grew up with a feminine name (Kim) and is constantly called “Ms” before they see/hear from him…it can get you down. But if she has a full name to fall back on for those “business style” situations…or even just if she grows up and would prefer a more feminine sounding name…then you’re set with a Camillia, Milliana, Millicent, Millie, Melina, Melinda, Mila, Melissa, Amelia, Emilia, etc.
Hear, hear. If I received an email from mills.ingamann@company.org (for example) I would assume it was from a man. And as most databases, forms, automatically generated email addresses/user ids, etc. disregard middle names or shorten them to just the initial I think it would be a real hassle for your daughter. “Mills” is lovely but I think given our bureaucratic world it’d work much better as a nickname.
Camilla “Mills” Margaret Ingamann, maybe?
My eyes were playing tricks on me, and I was reading Mills as “Millis” this entire time! Although I applaud your bravery in wanting to use an unusual and interesting name, Mills is all boy in my eyes. I too think it runs together with the last name. Now that I have my head on straight and see Mills instead of “Millis” I agree that Mills would be a spectacular nickname for the above mentioned names, and would eliminate the last name runtogether and the boyishness of it, replacing it with a fun and spunky nn.
Good luck!
I actually don’t think Isla and Eli are too close- I keep saying them out loud and they sound distinct enough to work. However, I think Isla runs into your last name the same way that Mills does so either way she would have to leave a purposeful pause between her first and last name when introducing herself. I agree with the commenter who noted that Mills seems to be your first choice so I say go for it. It’s such a spunky and cute name. I like the idea of using Amelia as a longer version. Eli and Amelia (nn Mills) sound like awesome sibling names.
I’d definitely recommend using Mills as a nickname for a more traditional name. This will give her more options in the future, just in case she finds Mills too hard to live with for whatever reason.
My sister is named Millicent and we call her Mills (or Milla) which I think works really well.
I’ll chime in here and vote for Mills-as-nickname. It sounds really cute and spunky for a little girl, but I think she would want another name to fall back on later in life. My grandmother has a name that was very unusual when she was growing up, and by the time she got to high school she hated it. Also, as someone who worked in computer support and online customer service, it does help to have a gendered name for correspondence purposes. I like the suggestion above of Melissa. I think it makes a good backdrop to the feisty Mills and it’s also similar to Isla.
I bet this topic would be great for a poll! (Mills as a girl’s name by itself vs. a nn, and Isla/Eli similarities)
But in case we don’t get one, I wholeheartedly support using Mills as a nn. As a given name, it’s limited in certain ways that are not a problem if it was a nn instead.
I like Mills!! A friend named her baby girl Miller and she is the sweetest thing ever. (her middle name also starts with an M!) She calls her Mil for short. I think Mills is super cute!
I also tried to say Eli and Isla and it kept coming out wrong!
I think Mills is the perfect name for the ‘would-I-want-this-name-myself’ test. Imagine introducing yourself as Mills at age 5, 15, 25, 50 etc. Does it work for every age and every situation? Would you prefer to have a more traditional name to fall back on?
Personally, I think that Eli and Isla are a bit too similar. You could always pair Isla with another name such as Rose. Eli and Isla-Rose does not sound as similar to me.
Ah, just reading this, but yes, this is what I was getting at in the comment I just posted. I would prefer to introduce myself as Margaret Mills (and have that on my business cards, etc.) and say “But everyone calls me Mills.” I think it’s a little different than a nickname because it is actually a given name, just not the first.
I vote Millie!
What about Milla Margaret? nn Mills?
Eli and…
Amelia Margaret? (nn Mills)
Emilia Margaret (nn Mills)
Camilla Margaret (nn Mills)
Matilda Margaret? (nn Mills)
I still think Mills Margaret is pretty fabulous, and if you both love it, go for it!
Best of luck :)
I’m almost always in favor of interesting first names, but, regretfully, I’m in the camp of giving her a more traditional first name and calling her ‘Mills’. When I say ‘Mills’ with your last name, it sounds very mashed together. I wonder if she introduced herself at three, would she constantly get, “Excuse me?” as a response. How disheartening to a sweet girl! And as irritating as this is, society has a way of making a nickname off of names that don’t fit into the box (eg. Jerricas that got called ‘Jessica’ and Kirstens that got called ‘Kristen’ or Susannas that got called ‘Suzie’). Would she be offended every time someone called her ‘Millie’? For that matter, would YOU be offended?
I LIKE the name ‘Mills’, but I think society might be easier on a Milana or Miliani.
All the best to you and your growing family! Please let us know what you decide!
Mills is cute!!! I’m not sure of the pronunciation of Isla though. I’ve heard it different ways. If it’s “eesla” (reminds me of Madonna’s La Isla Bonita!) then Eli and Isla are very close. If it’s “eyela” (like island) then it’s hard to say them together!
Jen- Yes its ‘Eyela’- like island. Which is a bit of a tongue twister with Eli.
Although I think Mills Margaret is pleasant to say, and I do like it, it does sound more like a nickname to me. I also think it leans towards being a boy’s name, mainly due to other predominately male names, like Wells, Brooks or Hayes.
I do love it as a nickname though for a longer name and would like to suggest Romilly nn Mills. I love this name and think it sounds great with Eli. Eli and Romilly nn Mills.
Romilly Mae is pretty!
Isla is a lovely name but does sound too close to Eli to my ear. What about Mila Rae nn Mills?
All the best!
I normally don’t like unisex names or surname names, but I do think Mills is really cute. If it was me, I’d probably chicken out and give her a different full name with the intent of calling her Mills. I think Camille is cute, but I think I’d go Mildred, knowing full well I’d never use it. But that would me easily give me the nickname Millie which I also love.
I’m not really sure how to explain my comment. But … something about the concept of ‘Mills’ as a nickname sounds too.. playful(?) to my ear? However, “Mills” as an actual first name sounds like a name-that-ends-in-S-and-thus-sounds-plural .. which I love. Like the girl in “The Blind Side”–Collins (ahh, love!). Or the boys’ name “Brooks.” Maybe a good way to explain it would be “James” as a nickname for a girl named Jamie … or James as a boys’ first name. One sounds cutesy, the other sounds classy. Does that make sense?
I know this is probably neither here nor there since perhaps people would think “Mills” is her given first name, if it were used almost all the time.
Buuuut, for what it’s worth, for this reason, I’m totally pro- “Mills Margaret” (and calling her by both sometimes… ah, it sounds like such an author name, swoon). I love it as a stand-alone name, but I actually don’t like it as much as a nickname.
Thanks ! I also think it works as a stand alone name. My husband is really not into the whole use it as a nickname for a more formal name thing. Seems like its just a pain on the first day of school if we are calling her Mills all the time anyway.
Not sure about other schools, but our elementary school has a form you fill out at registration. It has a spot for “full name” and then for “Name you wish your child to be called.” So if you have an Elizabeth that only goes by “Lizzie” or a Henry that goes by “Hank”, you just fill out that on the form and you should be good to go. A friend’s daughter had always been “Caty” until she decided that “Caitlin is a good Kindergarten name” so now the school knows her as “Caitlin” instead of Caty.
OH! Don’t listen to the naysayers! Mills Margaret is just beautiful, and because of the longstanding surname Mills, it doesn’t feel like a nickname at all, so I think it makes a perfect given name. Doesn’t need to be a nickname at all. And yet you can MAKE nicknames FOR it; “Millie” might naturally come up as a nickname, if you liked it.
I would LOVE to submit a resume with “Mills Margaret” at the top of it. Oh, I wish this were my name. So good.
Thank you Lacey!
I, too, had never heard of or though of Mills. And instantly loved it . I don’t think it is too stylistically different from Eli. Nor do I think you need a “full name” to use it. Eli is short and sweet and so is Mills.
Eli and Mills is adorable.
I love it. And have added it to my list. Use it! Please!
I love Mills Maragaret. We chose an unusual and somewhat masculine name for our daughter (also a surname) because WE loved it. That’s what matters. We do get questions (“oh, interesting. Is that a family name”) sometimes, but mostly from older folks and again WE love it. The grandparents do call her by a shorter, more feminine nickname and I’m fine with that. Everyone else called her by her full name. You could use “millie” as someone else suggested in that case.
You know… a year ago, I may have turned up my nose at Mills.
But when I read it, it struck me odd, but then I pictured a little gir with the name Mills and now I’m smitten! I LOVE it. I think you should go for it.
As a “name test” I also think about high school/college graduation when the full name is announced, and Mills Margaret Ingamann is wonderful. I also think about a grown woman introducing herself as Mills Ingamaan and I see it working… Specifically, I picture a lawyer or business woman for whatever reason. lol
I think Isla is too close to Eli. Personally, I could never name my children names that were at all close…or they would never be called the right name! lol
My vote is definitely with Mills. As a first name, or a nick name. I think it is quirky and beautiful.
Eli and Isla don’t work together, in my opinion, although both are very nice on their own.
As for Mills Margaret, the two names are pretty and fun to say together, but I just don’t think Mills holds up on its own, especially with your last name. As Swistle suggested, what about Margaret Mills Ingamann? I love how that sounds. Caveat: I’m pretty traditional when it comes to names, and love nicknames. So I can picture a woman introducing herself as Margaret Mills Ingamann and explaining that she’s gone by Mills since she was a child – in that case, I do like Mills.
Also, Eli Schwarz and Margaret Mills sound very nice together and should you have more children, I think it’d be easy to fit another name into that sibling set. Maybe not so much with Eli and Mills.
Good luck! :)
I do think Eli and Isla are too close together. I ran into a similar problem when we had a Rose and then I realized that it was very similar in sound to another name I liked: Ezra.
Mills as a girl name isn’t “my cup of tea”. It does sound masculine to me and it would make me wonder if it was a family surname that you were passing down. I’d probably want to ask you if it was.
I much prefer the idea of going with “Margaret Mills” but still calling her Mills. Or using Mills as a nickname for another name, as suggested above. I guess that does run the risk of your daughter one day dismissing “Mills” and going with another nickname like “Camie”, if for example you go with “Camilla”. Going with “Margaret Mills” makes that a little less likely to happen, but it still makes it possible.
Oh and did you see this blog today:
http://nameberry.com/blog/ames-keats-and-yates-preppy-ends-with-s-names-for-boys
Mills seems to fit in with this style.
That’s exactly what I thought when I heard Mills — preppy-sounding name for a boy.
I have to say that I don’t care for Mills as a given name for a little girl. Nor do I find the trendy use of a boyish-sounding surname as a first name compatible with Eli, a male biblical name that has been used for hundreds of years.
You wrote, “I wonder if I will get the hairy eyeball from relatives and general public if I use this name because its fairly obscure.” I feel sure you would. And as Swistle pointed out, this name is beyond obscure for a girl; most people have never heard of it as such.
I would use one of the formal names suggested here as your daughter’s given name, with “Mills” as the nn you call her most (all?) of the time. That would give her the option of using a clearly female name when she’s an adult or at any time she might decide Mills doesn’t suit her. I don’t think every girl can pull that off.
I especially love Emilia Margaret “Mills” and think it goes well with Eli also. (Since you plan to call her Mills, I don’t think it matters that both names start with E, if that’s something you want to avoid.)
Just wanted to add to this ‘Mills as a boy name’ discussion – Mills is a LOT like Miles (one letter different) – that does make me think ‘boyish’ a bit.
I love the suggestion of Margaret Mills nn Mills!!
To me Eli and Mills are both short and sweet. Which is something my husband and I prefer, easy to say, easy to spell etc .
I don’t associate Mills as a boy name probably because the only person I have ever known with this name was a female. Also, being so obscure for both genders (only 20 males last year) makes me think that this name can go either way since it is not already predominantly viewed as a male or female name.
Kacie, since Mills has been used so rarely, I’m curious about the full name of the girl called Mills whom you knew when you were a child. Do you happen to know her full name — first and middle? Was Mills her given name or a nn? Was it perhaps a family surname?
I know in the South it’s not unusual to give a child a family surname and call her/him by that name too. I’m wondering if that might have been how your friend Mills got her name.
I think it makes a big difference that you’ve known a girl with this name. I can understand how that would make the name seem right for your daughter.
Best wishes!
Kacie, since Mills has been used so rarely, I’m curious about the full name of the girl called Mills whom you knew when you were a child. Do you happen to know her full name — first and middle? Was Mills her given name or a nn? Was it perhaps a family surname?
I know in the South it’s not unusual to give a child a family surname *as her/his middle name* and call her/him by that name too. I’m wondering if that might have been how your friend Mills got her name.
I think it makes a big difference that you’ve known a girl with this name. I can understand how that would make the name seem right for your daughter.
Best wishes!
I actually know a little girl who’s father wanted to name her Mils but the mother convinced him to name her Milly with the nickname Mils. Now she goes by both names and they suit her.
Also, in some parts of the world it is quite common for nick names to be a shortened version of the name, with S or Z tacked on the end (E.g. Shelley = Shels, Julie = Jules, etc), so Mills as a nickname for Milly sounds quite reasonable to me.
While Eli and Isla are quite similar, if you did go with it you might consider other siblings names like
Eli, Isla and Liza
Eli, Isla and Ollie
I wonder if the name Mila might be a good compromise name for you, a combination of Mills and Isla and removing the problems of Mills being too unusual and Isla being too similar to Eli. Eli and Mila.
Good luck.
In my opinion, the only only only reason you should count out Mills is if it will make naming any future children impossible.
People getting emails thinking she’s a man? Not that big of a deal, and, if times don’t rapidly change in the coming years, might actually work to her advantage.
Having to say the name twice when introducing herself? From a Lashley, trust me, you get used to it.
Family/friends not liking it? You can’t please everyone, so why try? At least this way, you’ll know ahead of time that it’ll ruffle some feathers and can have a response in your back pocket in case you get some rude comments.
For the record, I don’t think you’ll have too hard of a time naming any babies who might come along down the road. If anything, you’ve opened the door to basically any style – you won’t feel confined to Biblical or surname or whathaveyou if there’s a baby #3 in the future. I do think Isla would limit you though.
I think Mills Margaret is charmingly old-southern and contemporary cool. Do it!
Thanks Lashley ! We do live in South Louisiana!
I saw someone suggest Milena and that was also going to be my suggestion. You could use Mills as a nickname or Mila (MEE-LUH) which gives you your Mills and Isla in a round about way in the same name! Milena Margaret Ingamann! I also like the suggestion of Camille.
Camilla with the nickname Mills would be great.
You could also consider:
Melissa nn Mills
Matilda
Millicent
Mildred
Emily
Romilly
Pomellina
Melisande
Mirabelle
Melinda
I was watching the news the other day and one of the anchors was named: Millaine.
It made me think of this post.
I’m not sure if the name was pronounced “Mill-ayn” or “Mill-ay-nee”. But it did definitely look feminine and would very easily lend itself to the nickname Mills.