Melody writes:
I’ve been reading your blog for a while now, anxiously awaiting the time when I would actually need your help! I’m exited to say that I’m expecting my first child, so the time has finally come! my name is Melody and my husband is Brendon. Our last name is Farris with an H. We are expecting a son in 3 1/2 weeks and are almost set on a name. Luckily, my husband and I have very similar naming styles and a couple of names that we love and sound perfect with our surname. So what is the problem you may ask? Well, most 5 of our top choices are extremely common and well established girls names. While most of them had strong roots as boys names years ago, they are now considered as completely “girly”. While these are the names that we absolutely love, we don’t want our son to grow up being constantly teased. We could really use some advice on what you, as a mother and an expert, think is usable!
The name that we had picked out for a girl was Amelia Bianca called Mila or Bianca Mila called Bebe.
Here are the 5 names in order from least to most favorite:
Our least favorite right now is Shay. It doesn’t really fit with our usual style but I love the sound! However, we are constantly tortured by the fact that our neighbor has a little girl Shea… and I hear this as a girls name quit often around where we live.
After Shay, we really like Morgan. This seems so boyish to me I can’t even picture it on a girl. However we have gotten many comments that it is “unusable” for a boy, and he’ll be tormented and teased… While I do kind of agree it breaks my heart because I love the name so much!
Also love the name Robin. This also seems so masculine because of Robin Hood of course, Robin Williams, and singer Robin Thicke… We were thinking of naming him Robert and calling him Robin, but I just don’t love Robert like I love Robin. My husband suggested Robinson, but my best friend just told me that that is what she is going to be naming her son! Now I feel like that rules out Robin for me too so maybe this isn’t an issue anymore…
But our most favorite right now is Kay. Me and my husband both love it and already see it as our sons name… yet its probably the most girly name of the bunch! When I hear it, I think of Sir Kay (from the King Arthur stories, he was his brother), and it was originally an english boys name. However, it is now probably most known as a nickname for the girls name Katherine.
I’ve come to realize that I can’t name my son Kay without worrying about him getting teased later, so we decided to just use it (if we do end up using it) as a nickname. We really love the name Zachary, which is obviously a strongly established boys name, and were thinking of naming him Zachary Hugo (middle name will be Hugh or Hugo no matter what), and calling him Kay, even though they are 2 completely different names.
Along with that, some other options we thought of were, Mackay/McKay called Kay, Cassius/Caspian called Cay, Clayton called Cay (we really like this one). (Sidenote: we like the spelling Kay better, but feel that Cay is more masculine.)
What do you and your readers think?
On a different note, I was watching the old Bravo tv show 9 By Design the other day, and learned that one of the boys on the show is named Holleder. I forget who he was named after, but I’ve really started to love the name! Hollister is an old family name on my side, so we could just say that Holleder was a family name to anyone who asked. But then again, I wouldn’t want it to seem like I named my son after those people!
I just feel like whichever way we go we are setting our son up for years of nasty remarks! Should we just name him Zachary Hugo and call him Zach?
Ahhh I’m literally tearing my hair out! Swistle, we need your help! What do you think about Kay? Holleder? Morgan? Are they too girly? Please let me know!
Thanks so much!! We appreciate your help.
My own opinion is that Kay is too feminine for a boy. However, I think the initial K. is not too feminine, and I’ve noticed initial-nicknames seem to be coming into style: several people recently have mentioned using, for example, E. as a nickname for Elliot, or J. as a nickname for James. I think you could name him any name starting with a K (Keane, Keaton, Keegan, Kent, Kian, Kieran, Kyle, Kyler…), and then use K. as his nickname. There may be a couple of auditory double-takes, but probably not a huge deal.
Or would you like the name Kai? The pronunciation is a little different, but it’s solidly a boy name. It can be a stand-alone name, or it can be short for Caius.
Or I wonder if you’d like the nickname Kip. I think it’s adorable, and that its appeal is similar to Kay’s. It’s used as a nickname for Christopher.
McKay seems like it might be a very good solution, but I worry that it’s too similar to Makayla. It’s common to have very similar boy/girl versions of a name (Kyle and Kylie, for example), but the name McKay is very uncommon and the name Makayla is very common, so I worry more about confusion.
I know one boy named Shea. It does seem like a very soft and gentle name, but it strikes me as unisex rather than girl. According to the Social Security Administration, in 2011 there were 232 new baby boys and 298 new baby girls named Shea/Shay/Shaye. One option would be use Shane; you could even still call him Shay.
Because you like both Shay and Kay, I suggest Jay. According to the Social Security Administration, the name Jay was given to 700 boys and 0-4 girls in 2011. My mom and I both love the name; she’s said that if she had another baby boy to name, she’d like to call him Jay.
I’d also like to suggest Hayes, and I think the HHH initials would be fun, but I’m not sure it works with the surname.
Wade would work well.
The “ay” sound is also prominent in a number of currently popular boy names: Aiden, Brayden, Cayden, Hayden, Jaden, Leyton, Mason, Peyton, Rayden, Zayden, etc.
I haven’t encountered the name Holleder before, and had to look up how to pronounce it. I didn’t find a clear answer, but one site said something that made me think it might be pronounced like Hollander but without the N sound: Hah-leh-der. Or is it like Holder? In fact, Holder might be a good one to add to the list of options. It seems dicey to say Holleder is a family name if it isn’t, and the spelling/pronunciation issues seem significant. It’s too bad Hollister doesn’t really work with the surname; I love family surnames as first names.
Morgan does seem to have crossed to girl, though not entirely: the Social Security Administration reports 469 boys and 3640 girls named Morgan born in 2011. Notice that although there are many more girl Morgans than boy Morgans, there still are quite a few boy Morgans. Other options: Keegan, Logan, Finnegan, Morrison, Rohan, Riordan, Malcolm.
If you decide Robin isn’t out for you (is your best friend expecting a baby boy right now, or is she just talking about some possible boy in the future?), it could also be short for Robertson—though I like it best in its traditional role as a nickname for Robert. I think it’s okay if you don’t like the name Robert as much as the name Robin; it’s common to accept a name to get a nickname or to accept a nickname to get a name, and rarer to love both name and nickname equally. The Social Security Administration shows 301 baby girls and 99 baby boys named Robin/Robyn in 2011, and I think any “girl name” protest could be put down pretty quickly with that list of famous male Robins.
Update—Melody writes:
Hi Swistle! Thanks to you and your readers for all your help and suggestions! You’ve helped so much.
I just wanted your opinion on one more thing. We recently heard of the name Cayman/Caymen, and think it is really cute (and masculine:)! We would of course call him Cay. However, my husband feels like we’d be “making up” the name… I’ve never really met another Cayman, so I’m not sure if he’s right or not… However, this has become a frontrunner for us, so I wanted to know what you and your readers thought of it.
Again, thanks for all the help!
Name update! Melody writes:
Hi Swistle!
I feel horrible that I haven’t updated you sooner, our little boy is 9 months old now(!), but things have been so hectic lately. But I thought, hey better late than never:) I wrote you all the way back in August, scared that the names we loved for our son we all too feminine, and your response really helped us pick a wonderful name.
Kaleb Hugo (H)arris was born at the end of August and we have been calling him Kay ever since (with no resistance whatsoever I might add). We had narrowed it down to
Kaleb “Kay” Hugo
Christopher “Kay” Hugh
Christopher “Kit” Hugh
and loved Kaleb the best.
(we also loved Robin, but my best friend, who was pregnant at the time and has had twins since, ended up naming one of her boys Robinson, and it fits him perfectly:)So… thank you so so much, your help is greatly appreciated!!
(On a side note, I recently found out that I am pregnant again (hooray!), so we might be emailing you again soon!)
I love the idea of a boy named Robin! I don’t necessarily think you should rule out Robinson because of your friend, but I also second swistle’s comment that lots of people use a full name that they don’t really like, just to give their child the flexibility when they grow up. but I think Robin is a pretty great name for a boy, and one that is unisex enough that it doesn’t necessarily lead to teasing.
I also like the idea of using something like Kai or Shay. Shane is a great name too which easily lends itself to the Shay nn.
Kay would be a very natural nickname for Kaleb.
I agree that Kay is too girl to use for a boy. However, I agree that as a nickname for a K name I don’t see a problem at all. You mentioned Clayton called Cay-but I think that might be confusing to people since Clay is so close and is the traditional nickname for Clayton. McKay reads as very girl to me as well, lots of the McMsomething names are going girl. Swistle’s suggestion of Jay is very good, I also thought of Ray which could be a given name or a nickname for Raymond. Of all your names, I think Robin & Morgan are probably the best bets for a boy these days.
What about kit? Short for Christopher, I knew a little boy Kit once and it was wonderful!
Or how about shay, short for Seamus? Completely legit, and such a great name!
Or Beckett, nn beck? Beckett Harris is pretty great, I think!
I do not think Morgan is too feminine at all. I have a male cousin named Morgan, so perhaps that is what is weighing my opinion. I say go with Morgan. It is a strong name and sounds great with your last name. Morgan Hollister or Morgan Hugo are great options.
While I like the name Zachary, I think it is getting too popular. But if popularity is not an issue for you, Zachary Hugo, Zachary Shay, Zachary Shea, or Zachary Morgan are all lovely names.
I was also intrigued by the name Holleder after watching the Novogratzs. And they were not afraid of using the feminine nickname Holly for their son. I like it, but I don’t know if I could be so brave. With your last name, I also think it is quite a mouthful.
My favorites for you would be Morgan Hugo or Zachary Shay.
I feel your pain, I love boys names like Harper and Emerson and Cameron. Still, I agree with Swistle, Kay is far too girly for a boy. But K. Is totally workable. I would suggest Kaleb, Kale, Keller, Klark or even Kayden…or what about Kristopherson? It might be a bit close to Robinson, but -son is such a popular ending these days, I think you could get away with it without offending your friend. And Kristopherson is so dashing and distinguished. Also, as swistle pointed out, Kay is a traditional nn for Christopher, so K or Kay is a natural nn for Kristopherson
Ohhh Morgan! I LOVE Morgan for a boy. I never think of it as a girl’s name first. Morgan was Wyatt Earp’s brother btw ;)
Most of your names I do find too girly to use by themselves, unfortunately, but the exception is Morgan. I find Morgan very unisex. Maybe it’s because I don’t know any Morgans personally and while I’ve heard of girls named Morgan, I mainly know of the name from Morgan Freeman and Chuck’s best bud Morgan on the show Chuck.
Robin while similarly unisex seems to be more girly to me. Enough that I’d only use it a nickname.
I really like the suggestion of using Shay as a nickname for Seamus.
I also like the suggestion of finding a name that starts with K and using that to get the nickname K(ay). I think that’d be better than McKay, which seems girly due to many McSomething names that are being used for girls. Neither Cassius and Caspian have the hard a of Kay, so I wouldn’t use those either. Clayton is problematic since people will probably hear Clay since that’s what they’re expecting instead of Cay.
I LOVE Morgan for a boy. I think it is so nice. I want you to use that!
And I don’t mind Kay for a boy at all. If it were me, I’d probably give him a more traditionally masculine name and then call him Kay exclusively. I like Clayton, and I don’t think you have to spell it with a C if you don’t want to. I know so many “Kate”s who are really Catherine.
And I love Robin too! So many good choices!
I say go with the name that seems right when he’s born. That’s what I did with my four kids, and I’ve never looked back.
I think of Morgan as a boy’s name, I’ve only known boys with the name, though. I really like the idea of naming your boy a K name and calling him K. Kyle, Kermit and … well Kermit is my favorite. Kermit Hugo Harris, nn K. I also like Kai, I went to school with a boy named Kai (rhymes with eye) and he was gorgeous.
I think she should pick a name that starts with the letter K to use K as a nickname (Kyle, Kevin, Kieran… ) or use Cay! With a C it ‘s much more masculine.
McKay can be pronounced as muh-KAI, so that may potentially be a problem.
I agree that you should use a ‘K’ name and call him K. Or Caden nn. Cay would be very natural, although Caden might be a bit trendy for you. Or Caleb works too!
Shay for Seamus! Or K IKay) for any name beginning with K, or a name like Callum. I think it’s funny that the poster above found “Zachary” to be too popular. I haven’t heard of any babies named Zachary since the 80s. But then I grew up with Zack Morris and Saved by the Bell – so there’s that. I imagine most of this stuff is regional.
I also liked the suggestion of Kai and Jay, plus there’s Grey (Gray. Greyson), Clay (Clayton), and hell if your best friend isn’t pregnant and you really love Robinson, go for it. Other names that you might like: Graham, Grant, and maybe one of my personal faces, Julian. It’s softer sounding and reminds most people of the feminine Julieanne, but is still firmly masculine.
Good luck!
– Christine
Ugh, faces= faves. Stupid autocorrect.
Christine
It’s your child name it what you and your husband like. They all are masculine names and no matter if you name a boy roger their will still be mommys using that name for little girls. You always have the ones who do that such as: Charlie Billie and Hayden.
I’m a little worried by your remark that you’re “constantly tortured” by the fact that one of your neighbors has a girl named Shea. I know you’re overstating, :), but by the time your son is in school there will most likely be many girls with some or all of these names, especially Kay. There are just so many Kayla’s, Katherine’s, Kayly’s, Katelyn’s etc., etc., and a lot of them are nn’d Kay. The most
natural way I think you can arrive at this name for a boy is via Caleb or Kaleb. The whole initial idea is cool but much more widely accepted with names beginning with other letters, don’t ask me why. The natural nickname for Clayton would be Clay.
I am myself the mother of a daughter named Robin, and while I know the name is used for boys as well, especially in Great Britain, most of the Robin’s I’ve known have been girls/women. I would be happy to meet a boy named Robin, though! (But Robin Hugh reminds me of Robin Hood.)
I have a friend with an 8-yr-old son named Kelly (last name McKay) but in this instance most of the female Kelly’s he’s met have been in their 20’s & 30’s, but it’s still a subject discussed between he and his parents, fairly often. I have another friend with a 10-yr-old son named Shea, and he’s the only one I know with this name.
I suspect you will get a lot of encouragement via the comments to go with a unisex choice simply because it’s so rare for the parents-to-be of a son to want to do so! For namenerds, it’s a source of vicarious pleasure when such a risk is taken. We almost never hear the parents-to-be of daughters wondering if a name is too “boyish.” But to make such a choice for a son, I think you need to be very confident in your ability to support/defend/enthuse over a unisex choice. We cannot really prevent our children from being teased–much of their ability to “pull off” a name rests with their own personality and confidence.
I like the name Cain nn Cay. Short and sweet but very masculine.
I know a 20 year old male named McKay, so it reads as masculine to me, and unisex at the very least. McKay Hugo (F)arris – I like it!
It can be hard to deal with a name that used to be a boy’s name but is currently thought of as a girl’s name. My nephew is named Sydney. It has a long history as a boy’s name, but because it gained popularity as a girl’s name recently, he always has people telling him he has a girl’s name. Also, things with names printed on them are usually done in girl colors for the name Sydney. We spend a lot of time reminding him that he was not given a girl’s name and that a lot of girl’s have what was traditionally a boy’s name. Anytime a male Sydney or Syd or Sidney or Sid pops up, I point it out to him. I think you should do what you want to do, but know that you will have to work at it.
(on a side note, my name is Kelley and when I worked in retail, old men what ask me why I had a boy’s name!)
I like swistle’s idea of the letter K as a nickname.
First off, I love Robin for a little guy. Your friend can’t put dibs on it if she isn’t pregnant yet.
Secondly, I am sooo jealous that your family name is Hollister. My absolute favorite boys name at the moment is Hollis, and this name could work absolutely perfectly for you. Hollis Farris (with an H) is slightly sing songy, but i honestly don’t mind it. His nn could be Holl (Hall) which is so super handsome. Even just using your family name in full, and having a son named Hollister Hugo Harris would be very fun, that way he could go by Hollis or Holl, maybe even Olli.
all the best!
First off, I love Robin for a little guy. Your friend can’t put dibs on it if she isn’t pregnant yet.
Secondly, I am sooo jealous that your family name is Hollister. My absolute favorite boys name at the moment is Hollis, and this name could work absolutely perfectly for you. Hollis Farris (with an H) is slightly sing songy, but i honestly don’t mind it. His nn could be Holl (Hall) which is so super handsome. Even just using your family name in full, and having a son named Hollister Hugo Harris would be very fun, that way he could go by Hollis or Holl, maybe even Olli.
all the best!
I don’t really understand why Hollister doesn’t work well with the surname. I think Hollister (H)arris is great. I love it.
I also like the suggestion of using K. as a nickname. I think Kay is too feminine, but for some reason K works.
I think you should go with whatever name you love. I think Kay will be a popular nickname in a couple of years, given all the Kayla’s, Kayden’s, etc.
Just one note on Holleder- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Willem_Holleeder > I wouldn’t go there, but this is not at all common in the US so feel free to ignore that.
It seems to me that Shay is your favorite – then use it. Don’t worry about what others say, it’s your choice.
Some other ideas:
Shaw
Tay
Bey/Bay
Finley/Finlay
Murray
Stanway
oops -I meant, Kay – It seems you love Kay so then use it even if it may become popular :)
I applaud those who like “unisex” names for boys! With the possible exception of Kay, I think that any of your ideas would work on a boy (I especially like Morgan and Robin). Robin is now solidly in fashion limbo for girls, so it’s one that I think is ready to be reclaimed by Team Blue (similar to my own name, Kelly).
When I see/hear “Kay” it makes me think of a woman my grandmother’s age. Both very feminine and not at all in style.
I agree that Cay looks much more masculine, but I would only use it as a nickname for something else. The sound is still super feminine to me.
Morgan and Robin- I’d expect them to belong to a girl, but I wouldn’t be surprised to learn they belong to a boy. But, I would definitely be surprised to hear any baby named either of these- they’re not really in style. Maybe that could work to your advantage though- people might not be thinking of them as boy/girl because they’re not thinking of them at all.
I’ve never heard of Holleder- it looks and sounds pretty made up. Hollister reminds me too much of the store, and not in a positive way.
I think I like Shea the best! That spelling is much more masculine to me than Shay, I think because of Shea Stadium.
For what it’s worth, I recently had a conversation about this issue with a male Jamie in his mid/late twenties. He grew up with long hair (hippie parents), was frequently mistaken for a girl, and hated it & tried for a while to switch to James…but is proud of being a Jamie now as a grown man who gets to determine his own hair cut and can have a full beard if he wants. I’m not sure what my point is exactly, except that a name is a lifetime proposition…and little Kay may hate his name when he’s 13 but love it when he’s 23 and discovers that chicks dig guys who are secure about their sexuality.
I think Morgan and Robin are usable for boys and the idea of the initial K is an interesting one. But Zachary has none of the drawbacks of the others and you do like it so that seems like a solid choice for you.3
I like the name Robin from your list and think that it would work well on a boy/man. During the years that there may possibly be some teasing, there are plenty of “manly” nickname options including Rob or Ben. I think Robin Hugo F(H)arris sounds lovely.
In my mind, I can imagine you decorating a room in Winnie the Pooh (with Christopher Robin) and dressing the little man up in Batman gear. So sweet!
Good luck!
I think Kay is too feminine. But I just ADORE JAY. Seriously. *swoon!*
What about Cyrus nn Cy? Different sound but kinda similar.
I adore Robin for a boy too. I do have a sister named Robyn and I don’t see it as clearly girl or boy.
I also like Shay. I have a male cousin named shay. This spelling is way more masculine IMO.
My grandpa’s middle name is Morgan and I like it for both sexes.
Robin is a wonderful name for a boy. I like it a lot with your surname.
Other ‘strong but silent’ type names I humbly suggest for you are Glen and Lane. Both are classic like Robin and still decidedly male (not to mention practically unused!). Caspian (nickname of Cass) and Jasper (Jay) are good grown-man sort of choices, too.
One other name that seems like a cool fit is Hayward Hugo ‘Farris’. I just LIKE it! His nickname could be Hayes or even Harry (if that’s your style).
Best wishes to you and your family! Please let us know what you and your husband decide!
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Well, 31 boys were named Cayman and 9 were named Caymen in 2011, so if it’s a made up name then 40 other people made it up too in 2011 alone.
As for what I think of it. I’m honestly not a big fan. I immediately think of the Cayman Islands, which may be pretty place, but I’m not a big of place names like India or Britain either. I also think that with that association and with it being a popular vacation/resort spot you might get people asking or at least implying that he was named that because y’all were there 9 months before he was born.
My next association is Caveman as it sounds very similar especially to Cayman and with kids being as they are I doubt I’ll be only one to think of it. My position on this sort of thing is that kids will think of a way to mock any name, but try not to make it too easy for them.
However, if you and your husband love the name, then use it. No one name will be loved by everyone.
If you’re curious about all the boy names that start with Cay that showed in the 2011 SSA report, I’ve copied them below from most to least popular. The number is how many baby boys were given that name in 2011.
Cayden, 2548
Cayson, 194
Caysen, 81
Cayleb, 66
Caydon, 31
Cayman, 31
Caydin, 26
Cayde, 20
Caydence, 20
Cayne, 18
Caydan, 17
Cayle, 12
Caylan, 9
Caylen, 9
Caymen, 9
Cayce, 8
Caydn, 8
Caynen, 8
Caycen, 7
Caydenn, 7
Caylon, 7
Cayd, 6
Caydyn, 6
Cayetano, 6
Caylum, 6
Caynan, 6
Cayl, 5
Caylem, 5
Caylin, 5
Cayton, 5
Have you considered Seamus? It’s an Irish name (pronounced SHAYmus)and could get you to Shay another way. Good luck!
I personally would not use Cayman or Caymen for all of the same reasons Heidi J stated above. It also sounds like “came in,” which could be a potential teasing problem especially among teen boys.
It sounds like you are really sold on Cay, Kay, or K for your son, so you should probably find a name that could have Kay as a nickname. I like Kay more than Cay; it looks more masculine to me and I love the Sir Kay association. Jewel recently named her baby Kase, and that could easily have the nickname Kay or K. Kase Morgan, or Kase Hugo sound nice, but I’m not really sure if I like the way it sounds with your surname. Hmmm. How about Kaleb or Caleb with the nicknames Kay or Cay depending on if you are partial to the K or C? Kaleb Hugo sounds great!
I immediately think of the Cayman islands, and now that I read Caveman, I can’t unsee it. The Cayman islands are named after Caimans, which are a type of alligators.
However, Caedmon is a “real” name (Cædmon’s Hymn), and comes close to Cayman. I like it a lot!
That said – if you feel Cayman/men is the name for you, go for it!
Some other thoughts–
Cayen (like Cayenne)
Cavan
Cayvan/Kayvan (- Persian name)
Cayn
Caydan/Caydon
At the Olympics, I saw a runner named David who goes by Dai. Perhaps also an option for you? I.e. Callan or Callum, nn Cay?
Honestly, the more times I see it written, the more I like the simplicity of Kay…or Cay. I agree that the Sir Kay connection isn’t something you should compromise on if that’s what you like about the name. There’s no “We named him Jay, which is like Kay, as in Sir Kay.” There are currently very few little girls being named or called Kay, and lots of little boys with simple, monosyllabic names that are similar enough in style to Kay (Kai, and Dai, and Kase, and Cade, and Grey) that I bet people will completely take it in stride, especially if you live somewhere where not every baby is named after a Catholic saint. Appellation Mountain just did a post on names she heard in a children’s competition at a rodeo. Kay could fit right in with Bode, Shane, and Zane…or I could see it also fitting in just fine at an elementary school where little boys have European style nicknames like Avi and Sasha, or non-Western names like Jianfei or Seng.
I think Cayman/Caymen is okay, but my first reaction was, isn’t that one of the characters on South Park? (He’s Cartman. Oops.) I like the idea of Kane or something along those lines if that appeals to you at all. It makes me think of the Bourne Identity movie. (One of his aliases was John Michael Kane.) Feels very masculine to me for that reason, I guess. You wouldn’t even really need to shorten it to Kay since they sound so close (at least in my Canadian accent).
Well, Cayman is not really my style, but it’s a nice way to get to Cay. I’d use it- it feels no more made-up than a ton of names that are ‘modern’, and also has a connection to the Caribbean, so it’s a place name if anything.
I like the Cayman spelling better than Caymen. I would automatically think of the Cayman Islands, which I don’t know how positive an association that is- makes me think of people hiding money there… but it would be a name I’ve heard of because of it.
If you’re set on calling him Kay/Cay, then I think it’s a really good option. I like Cay so much better than Kay!
I really like the above poster’s suggestion of Caedmon.
Cay is pronounced “key” isn’t it? (I keep thinking of the kids book The Cay, by Theodore Taylor) Spelling it Kay might make for less confusion.
I’m not sure if it has been mentioned but what about Kade ?
In Australia it is gaining popularity fast !! It was a top name for my best friend however she had a girl and then a month later my Aunty had a baby boy ‘Kade Lachlan’
Kristen Cavalleri or reality tv fame just had her baby and named him Camden Jack. I think a more suiting nickname would be Cam for Camden, but you could definitely use Cay as well. Camden Shay is even better for the nickname Cay. Camden Shay or Camden Shea are lovely combinations, and I dont think anyone would think it was weird if his nickname was Cay.
I know someone who just named their baby Cayman as well, so unless it randomly happens to be the same baby it is not just made up.
I was going to suggest Kane as well. There is a young NHL star who plays for Chicago, Patrick Kane, who some associate the name with. I’ve known two in my life – one is in his thirties, and my friend has a two year old with the name and they call him Kaner as a nickname. I think Kay is a great aural nickname, but in writing I’d go for the given name you choose.
I also like Kane – I have a friend named this and it sounds like Kay, only more clearly masculine.
Also, does anyone spell Casper with a K? then you could have the nickname K…