Cherie writes:
HELP!!!! I am scheduled for an induction on the 1/14/11 if I don’t go into labor before then and we don’t have a name. The truth is, he has had SEVERAL names and none have stuck. The worst part is…My husband got me to agree on something (in a moment of complete panic!) that I am SOOO not okay with, and now he won’t back off it! I can’t bring myself to concede and go with DH’s name, even with COMPLETE control of the middle name! Our last name is two syllables and starts with K.
A brief history…
We have an almost three year old named Evangeline and we call her Evie. We love how her name is not too common but not unfamiliar. It was hard agreeing on a name, but once we found Evangeline, we both “knew” that was it. Our taste in boy names it quit different though. Evangeline to us sounds ethereal, timeless, elegant, and has a kind of ambiguous European sound. It also is a variant of an important family name and that is very important to me. For boys, however, we generally like outdoorsy and masculine sounding names. Our biggest “name rule” WAS that it isn’t too popular (probably anything over 200). Also important is a good NN, but not a deal breaker. That leads us to Jack…
As I said, he has had several names. Months six through nine we had been pretty set on Ranger. We love the idea of this name. It is not common and VERY outdoorsy but still fits with a lot of the current name trends. We had so many bad reactions to it we started to second guess ourselves. So we decided to give him a “safe” first name and use Ranger as the middle but still call him Ranger. That way if he grows up and hates it, he can go by his first name. That is how we came to Jack. We had briefly discussed it early in the pregnancy but dismissed it due to it’s overwhelming popularity (esp. considering Jackson, Jax, and Jaxon). However, it is also a family name, and would work well for a “safe” name. DH liked it more than me and brought it up again. I agreed to it, on the pretense that we would be calling him Ranger and not Jack. HOWEVER… I started liking Ranger less, and he started liking Jack more. Now he is COMPLETELY STUCK ON JACK…and I can’t BARE the thought of naming my son that. It doesn’t feel right in any way. I also don’t like how it works with Evangeline.
Now I don’t know what to do. Do I settle for Jack because DH is suddenly so in love with it, or do I stick to my guns and fight for another name? There isn’t really anything else we agree on. The only other name he really likes now is Leif…and I HATE it. We both kind of like West but it doesn’t work well with our last name. I like Sawyer, Mason (popular I know but it doesn’t feel as trendy to me and I have ALWAYS loved it AND it was one of the names we agreed on early in the pregnancy), and Archer. All are borderline too popular/trendy but I would WAY rather use one of them than Jack. BUT if I had to pick a name on the spot it would either be Mason, with an important family middle name or…Xavier with the NN Zane. DH grew up in the South West and can’t get over the pronunciation of Javier rather than Xzavier. Xavier, to me, has all the same qualities as Evangeline. They sound SO nice together and they both come from Saint’s names! Evangeline and Xavier…And Zane and Evie both sound so fun, light hearted, and adventurous. To me they make the perfect sib set.
Long email I know. Do I push for Xavier or Mason? Do I try to find a name from scratch? Do I settle with Jack? HELP!!! I’m working on barrowed time!
Don’t panic. Don’t pick a name on the spot; don’t give in just because time is running out. (Perhaps read the post from earlier today.) As I understand it, you’ll be pressured to name the baby before leaving the hospital, but you DO have longer than that to register the baby’s name, it’s just a little more hassle. Does anyone know the legal details on this? “It took us four weeks to choose the right name for you!” makes a way better story than “We ran out of time so we panicked and chose something neither of us really like.”
In the meantime, tell your husband Jack is out (this is not the kind of situation where one spouse should hold the other to an agreement), and that another name needs to be decided on. Right now he is working in “MAKE HER CHANGE HER MIND!” mode, and he needs to be switched out of that before he can reasonably discuss or come up with other names.
Names to consider:
Ace
Arrow
Barnaby
Bosley
Calder
Callan
Canyon
Dover
Drake
Fisher
Forest
Forrester
Gideon
Grove
Houston
Jude
Lennox
Magnus
Merrick
Miller
Oakley
Orion
Raiden
Redford
Redmond
Rockford
Rowan
Sherwood
Slater
Thatcher
Tillman
Turner
Walker
I’ll keep working on this in “make list first, check to see if each name works later” mode and re-publishing as I go: it got caught in my spam filter and has been there since Tuesday and it seems best to publish as soon as possible so we can all work on it together.
Dig your heels in re: Jack, you will be quite sad if you bow out and don’t like your son’s name.
Ryder! Sounds like ranger but more often a name. What about just using Zane? Good luck!
Don’t be bullied in to a name; you’ll end up resentful (towards your husband.
I’d be wary of using Ranger as a first name, because it will sound like a title: Ranger Jack [Kincaid].
Xavier and Mason are both nice. I read it as Javier, though. If you don’t want to be correcting people (or don’t want it for your son) you may want to give it a pass. Is there an alternate (more phonetic) spelling of Xavier?
If your husband doesn’t like Mason, maybe something similar sounding? I knew a Naason (pronounced just like Mason, but with an N). Or maybe Macon?
Possible common ground: Apparently, both Jack and Zane are variants of the name John. So if DH insists that an agreement made is an agreement followed… first name John or Jack Ranger, NN Zane, perhaps? or skip Ranger and just use that family name? Zane doesn’t sound that much like Xavier to me anyway, and I’ve never heard it used as a NN for anything. I was surprised to see “John” come up in the search. I agree on your feelings about Jack and Evie not quite matching, but Zane and Evie sounding nice.
If you do have a name that you love and think belongs to your son–rather than just a dislike of Jack–then yes, I’d renegotiate. Jack is a name he loves and you kind of hate. Thus, the middle name shouldn’t be Ranger, it should be something you love–no matter what he thinks of it. Or, he can work with you to start from scratch, hopefully finding other options that nobody hates.
And plenty of people meet their babies before quite having a name ready for them. =)
Xavier is perfect and I agree, Evie and Zane rule. What about spelling it Zavier, or use Zander?
For the other names: Jacob instead of Jack could also work?
Ranger reminded me of Rafe, nn for Raphael/Rafael or Rafferty?
Some other names that may fit your style: Atticus, River, jagger, Magnus, Tinder?
Good luck! Hopefully tomorrow you’ll see your boy and know what name is right for him :-)
I agree…don’t cave on Jack. There are a bajillion Jacks & variations.
Sawyer, I kind of love that name more than is acceptable. (:-D
Someone suggested Rafferty and I like it so much more than Ranger.
Yes, what about Zander or Xander and call him Zane? Or just name him Zane.
Ryder is nice too. West or Weston.
Dane is still fairly uncommon and goes well with Evie, although there is no nn. Kade/Kaden or Cade/Caden
I agree Evangeline and Xavier are a great set. I also know a little boy Zade which your husband may like more than Zane.
Jason is a combination of Jack and Mason. Maybe a compromise there? While common in our generation, I don’t hear of any little boys being named Jason these days. Plus if you want outdoorsy and masculine, think of Jason from the Greek legend.
Mason is one of my favourites too. Maybe you can sway your husband by naming the baby Mason with the nickname Mack.
Good luck tomorrow!!
Loving the Miller suggestion. And Ryder, too.
Ooo, Swistle does it again!
I’m loving Miller, Fisher, Rowan for the rugged names the best. What about Anderson or Anders–like those with Evie as well, even though they’re more Swedish.
Good luck tomorrow! I totally agree that waiting until you both have a name you agree on–even if it takes a month–is better than being pressured to use a name you don’t love yourself.
Update us!!
I think Zane is fine as a stan-alone name and sounds great with Evie. I also like the sound of Jason.
Some other names to consider:
Jedidiah (nickname Jed)
Tobin (nickname Toby)
Abraham (nickname Abe or Bram)
Maximillian or Maxwell (nickname Max)
Maybe Use Alexander to get to the nn Zane?
Jude
Forrest
Reid
Pierce
Grayson (nn Gray)
Ezra
Gage
Colt
Grant
Cale
Dylan
Rafe
Hudson
Simeon
Vaughn
Emmett
Cooper
Holt
Seth
Roman
Okay, how about a few more suggestions?
– Walter. This seems outdoorsy and strong to me. It seems pretty difficult to find something to tease a person about with this name. Evangeline and Walter. Evie and Walt.
– Jed. Same first letter as Jack, but so much more uncommon. If you wanted to, you could use Jedidiah as the full name with Jed as a nickname. It changes the outdoorsy feel a bit, though, doesn’t it?
– Gage. I like Gage a bit better than Ranger. To me, they both have similar sounds, but Ranger does have the chance of sounding more like a title than a name. Shockingly, Gage is actually more common than Ranger.
Anon and I must have been typing Jed at the same time. That might be a good sign. :)
Soren? Lachlan? Ezekial, nn Zeke?
I like these names that have been suggested: Archer, Drake, Forrest, Rowan & Ryder.
I know a boy around 3 or 4 named Cedar. That might work for you. And Timothy or Basil could be considered outdoorsy names since they are both plants.
Or how about Grey? I like that a lot. Evie & Grey sounds nice.
Definitely don’t rush to name your baby the second he is born. If you hate the idea of Jack rule it out, but don’t put your husband in the same situation with Xavier. Wind back the stress-o-meter a bit and calmly discuss the naming situation together.
There are a lot of great suggestions in the comments that could also be compromises. EG: Mason n/n Mack
Rafferty n/n Rafe (similar in my mind to Leif which he likes.)
Ryder (similar in sound and style to Ranger, but more widely recognised)
Good luck and whatever you name him enjoy your little man.
Blaine?
Not sure I’ve got anything for this one since i have a Jack. I hope whatever you choose you both love it as much as we love Jack! : )
Good luck with the induction
I second Ryder or Zane as the first name. Also,
HAMPTON
PARK(ER)
SOLOMON
HARRIS
SADLER
HOLDEN
FOWLER
HUDSON
LADD
TRUMAN
EMMETT
GUNNER
ROAN
RONAN
NORTH
GEORGE
BAUER
Best of luck!
The only Zane I’ve ever heard of was the writer Zane Grey. I just checked to see the source of his name and read that his birth name was Pearl Zane Gray. As with so many writers, he later went by his middle name Zane, his mother’s maiden name. Thus Zane is a stand alone name, originating as a surname. (He grew up in Zanesville, Ohio, a city founded by his maternal ancestor Ebenezer Zane.) Zane Grey wrote about the Old West, and that apparently is why the name Zane came to associated with the West. I think it would fit your criteria, but I wouldn’t hook it to Xavier, a totally different name.
As others have said, it would be best if you resist giving your baby a name right away. Take your time to figure out which name appeals to both you and your husband the most.
Some of the names The Baby Name Wizard Expert Name Matchmaker suggests with Evangeline/Evie:
Milo
Jasper
Leo
Everett
Grady
Lincoln
Miles
Best wishes tomorrow.
how about Judson, NN Judd?
Mason sounds like a great choice. My first thought was Vance or Vaughn.
Other ideas:
Grady
Brody
Scott
I thouht of Desmond for you! Desmond and Evangeline flowed great to me and Des and Evie is cute!!
Xavier to me is X-Avier so I like the idea of changing the spelling if you want a different pronounciation.
I also like a lot of other suggestions above – good luck!
Jack, Sawyer and Evangeline make me think of LOST immediately. I love the name Evangeline and love to see it used. Zane is a great idea. How about Wilder? Uncommon but familiar and easy to say/spell and has that “outdoorsy” feel. Plus I love it…
I LOVE Xavier and would never think to read it Javier. It goes excellent w/ Evie too.
Swistle’s Redmond suggestion reminds me of Edmond, which I knew a couple of growing up. Edmond and Evie sounds cute I think.
What about Marshall?
Regarding Wilder suggested above — Because wilder can be taken as a form of the adjective wild, I don’t think it makes a good name for a boy or man, although I know a family of three young boys who would wear the names Wild, Wilder and Wildest very well. :D
Wilder makes me think of Laura Ingalls Wilder and Almanzo Wilder. I really like it. It seems like a surname name to me.
That Mason nn Mack thing really appeals to me. Seems like a happy compromise all around.
I love the name Archer! Also, since Evangeline is a very traditional Acadian name (I’m Acadian, and I have more than one Tante Évangéline), I thought I would suggest a few names from my own family tree:
Remy (or Remi)
Casimir
Leander
Leo
Olivier
Raphael
Damien
Luca
Arthur
Good luck!
Jack and Evangeline… “Wow, you two must have loved LOST!” *wince* Unless you did, I’d steer away from Jack, Sawyer, Desmond, Locke, etc.
Do you like the name Guide? What about Ruston? Both have a rustic, authentic outdoor feel.
Sleep on a name; relatives can wait to know. Having a baby is STRESSFUL! Let your family of four just enjoy cuddling together. The right name will make itself apparent. All the best to you!
Smokin’ list Swistle!
From this list, I love Lennox Jude and/or Jude Lennox. Not sure if either combo is “outdoorsy” but both are very masculine in my opinion.
I’m also really liking Drake – it has the potential to sound rugged and/or refined.
If you don’t like Jack Ranger, would you like Jude Ranger?
Slater also sounds outdoorsy too – kind of like Sawyer but a bit more polished.
Good luck – let us know what you pick.
You’ve probably already decided on a name at this point – but this morning over coffee I thought of another that seems to fit your “outdoorsy” criteria and is similar to Leif – Heath.
I hope you post an update so we can find out what you chose!
Wilder is definitely a surname name. My great-grandmother’s name was Alice Wilder, and 3 of her 5 sons, including my grandfather, had Wilder as their middle name. (Alice Wilder was a distant relative of Almanzo Wilder mentioned above.) I think Wilder is fine as a middle name, especially with a family connection, but I’m really surprised that it’s now being used as a first name. It seems too negatively descriptive — a mild mannered little boy called Wilder would be mis-named, while a very wild boy’s traits would be further emphasized (and perhaps encouraged) if he were called Wilder.
Hope we hear what Evie’s little brother was named.
I’ve had a very belated thought on this one … Leroy to me sounds manly and outdoorsy and also sounds good with Evangeline.
Ican’t stop thinking about this poor lady – I really hope she sends an update to let us know how it panned out for her.