We are having a bit of a problem, and it is this: we can’t keep up with the number of naming questions we’re getting. It would be nice to be considering names two or three months before the due date, I think, or even earlier, but right now we’re considering names about two weeks before the due dates—and that’s with doing them at a rate of a question every two days on average.
For awhile what I’ve been doing is periodically posting one without an answer from me, and periodically skipping one entirely—but even that isn’t enough now. There is going to need to be either (1) more of the former, or (2) more of the latter, or (3) more of both.
Do you have an opinion? Would you like to see all the questions? Or will you wear out on name-helping if there’s a post every day or twice a day, and it would be better to do more skipping so we can spend more time/effort on the ones we do take?
One option is that we could start skipping the ones that don’t include a surname (or at least a surname stand-in), since it’s so hard anyway to make suggestions if we can’t sound them out with a surname. Another option is we could start helping with EITHER a boy name OR a girl name: it would be fine if the parents didn’t know the sex of the baby, but in that case they’d ask us for help only with the name category they were having more trouble with.
What do you think? What would be your favorite way to do things? And do you have any other suggestions for figuring out which ones to skip?
You could always, you know, take on a naming helper who would happily tackle some of your to-do list.
But for your suggestions, I like the weekend posts without your input as a compromise and/or getting to ask for help with only one gender name. The posts with both seem like the most work.
I’d lean towards only one gender and maintaining your input on all the questions. Sometimes the best names come from your sparks of ooh I like how this sounds and the ones that don’t have your ideas feel incomplete.
I was going to suggest what Suzanne did…to have someone else help you out.
I think the ones where you don’t post any commentary are fine. I wouldn’t mind seeing more of those. I think focusing on a gender would help…the ones that need assistance with both do seem to be rather long and I can tell you put a lot of effort into those. Maybe also don’t offer commentary on those that have a final list, just pop up a quick poll on those or something like that. But most importantly do what you feel is right!
I wouldn’t mind higher volume of posts, but I think the fun of it is seeing an outsiders take on the submitters request for advice. I am usually bummed out to read the ones with questions and no input. (Though commenters usually do help in that category- I don’t see all the comments because I read through an RSS feed)
I agree with the others, add a couple of volunteers who can commit to answering so many questions per week. I’ll volunteer!
i check your site daily, and i would love to see more posts, actually. even if you post them without your input, as i’m sure that’s very time-consuming, the questions would still get answered. i’d love to see posts more often on the site. :)
Definitely do the ones that have given a Surname/stand-in before the ones that don’t.
I like the idea of posting ones without a response on the weekend so readers can comment.
I like one a day but I would LOVE two a day.
If you get any that have zero name input ‘DELETE’.
I haven’t seen too many writers lost for both girl and boy names. So I would limit that …..yet.
I meant to say ‘wouldn’t’ limit that….yet. In my last sentence.
I’m currently pregnant, so I read your site and even the back articles on days without posts. So I think the more the merrier.
However, I have noticed that you do spend a lot of time on certain replies, or at least a lot of words. I think you could be more abrupt and therefore take less of your own time if you’d like.
I think PLEASE don’t skip the more usual name questions in favor of some of the stranger names. Its amusing to read those posts, but it is also really annoying to to think of children with those ridiculous names and parents who think they are being so clever by naming their child such an uncommon noun as a name. I think if I were tending to write the blog, I would probably weed through posts and have a tendency to pick the most interesting ones. But… as a reader, those most interesting posts are not helpful as I consider naming my child!
Also, I think you could do a standard form letter reply that has your top picks for other children with the same general questions or provide a list of external site resources that you really love.
That being said… I sure hope I find the baby’s gender soon so I can get on your waiting list! We’ve got a strange, German vowel pattern last name that eliminates a lot of my favorite names. And we’ve got a champion name for our first child – Daniel Henry Haid (*Hyde)that we want to match or better for Baby #2!
I read through my google reader so I am not acutally on the site to read the comments very often. Honestly, if there isn’t a surname I don’t even read the post to see if I could help with comments. I like reading the posts with your comments at the end because I feel like most people are sending in for help because they want your opinion. I also think if you did one gender or the other and not both it would help. I would think that most people usually have one girl or boy name picked out and are having a really hard time with the other gender. I know that was the case with both of my pregnancies.
Just my opinion. You do what you want because I will still read no matter what. :)
A few helpers, if you’re up for it, could really help with the volume.
And your commentary, however brief, is really great. It gets the ball rolling for the rest of us.
If they tell you their list I would just post it with a poll. Otherwise I’d post the entry and ask for feedback. In terms of your actual feedback (my favorite) … Maybe you could pick your favorite email every week and respond to that one?
Also, I wonder if you could post a list of useful links on the side with responses you’ve given to common questions like “how can you tell if a name is going to get popular?” or tips for finding common ground when husband vetoes all your choices etc…
I think this, “Also, I wonder if you could post a list of useful links on the side with responses you’ve given to common questions like “how can you tell if a name is going to get popular?” or tips for finding common ground when husband vetoes all your choices etc…” is a great idea. Many of the people who write you seem to have some of the same problems.
I also like the idea of you only choosing your favorite entries to comment on, but I would like to see more than one per week. If you could get helpers, that would be neat, to see the different perspectives. And if that’s not something you are interested in, I think that making restrictions would be fine, as long as people know that when they look at the site (list it by your contact info or something).
I like it when you are provided with the surname. It allows us to see the whole picture. My vote is only the ones that are willing to provide their whole name.
I can understand your dilemma and the sense of responsibility to respond to those who write to you.
I don’t know if you use this now, but I’m thinking a computer generated response could be sent immediately to each person who writes to you, with the explanation that you post as many as you can, within certain limits, which might include:
–Request must come from one of the parents (not friend or relative)
–Request must include a stand-in for the surname (perhaps give an example of what you mean by that)
–If there are siblings, please include names
–We can help with only one name per family, either a boy name or a girl name
–Any other criteria you may have.
–And maybe that if someone sent in a request that didn’t meet these criteria, she/he could send the request again.
As was suggested above, I would also include a list of your favorite baby name books and websites.
As for those requests that meet your criteria, I’d suggest you post up to two a day, with your response or not, according to your time availability. Some posts will receive far more input than others, just as is the case now.
If I were choosing, I would post — and respond to as able — more requests with fairly ordinary name searches than those seeking extremely unusual names (or non-personal names to use as first names). The latter are ‘interesting’, but the former would be helpful to far more expectant parents reading through this blog to find baby name suggestions.
I really enjoy the ‘naming puzzles’ presented on your blog and would like to see more of the requests that are sent to you.
(PS You used to have another woman helping you — Marzie?; I’ve forgotten her name. Are you now answering all the posts by yourself or do you have others helping? Also, I’m wondering if this blog is a ‘job’ for you, with earnings from the advertisements on it? Too, how do those who write to you hear about this blog?)
I say post more without answers. Or just offer a few quick names that might come to mind right away, and leave the rest to readers. Especially the not so complicated ones. Your readers usually have really great opinions and offer great names. I think it’s better to offer something than nothing.
I don’t know if the polls are much work but if they’re not, just a poll for simpler situations might help. I don’t mind the queries that are posted without your response. And I do think that most people get some input from commenters.
Yeah, I prefer to know the last name but I don’t see it doesn’t affect my interest significantly. I don’t think I’d use that as a deciding factor on who makes the cut, though I realise that it is an administratively simple line to draw.
I also think that, really, you don’t need to be accountable for any of this. Post the ones you feel like posting. Reply to the ones you feel like addressing. Arbitrary is totally acceptable. Your blog, your rules.
(I’m sure you already would do this but… ) I’d give an exception to the one name thing for people expecting multiples.
I think that if they are coming for advice on an existing list, it would be ok to simply post the list with a poll on the side.
I think a FAQ page would be helpful that would answer the issues of Popularity, Unusual Names/Spellings, Trends. Also include a link to that baby name website that shows the graph indicating the popularity of a name (is it Nymbler?).
I know in one of your recent posts you had a very good response on how to tell if a name is gaining in popularity. You referred to the big jumps on SSAs popularity charts. You also refered to the Wow, Why didn’t I think of that name before? factor. Compiling that for a FAQ page would be great. Everyone seems to want to avoid using a tired-out name.
And it would be possible to make your suggestion lists shorter. Sometimes you recommend many, many names (which is great, you can never tell what will set a spark), but I know you put a lot of time into those, so it might help shortening it down.
Also, I really don’t mind the questions with no response. You could save some of the simpler questions for that format, I think.
I don’t really know how to solve the problem of how to get ahead, but I do very much like hearing your Swisdom and opinions on the issues at hand. :)
I’m in with you have to include some kind of surname. And, I like the idea of boy OR girl names even if sex is unknown… Then posting some without your commentary might help as well….
Bring it on. I’d love more posts. It might make sense to apply the limiting criteria to whether or not it gets commentary from you, but not to whether or not it gets posted.
Sheesh, Swistle! You offer this amazing service, your thoughtful answers, and your limited time… whatever you do on this site is just plain nice!
I’m sure things have gotten so popular because there are a LOT of babies being born this year, and loyal readers keep referring parents to your site. It’ll ease off eventually.
In the time between then and now, your commentless weekend posts are fine. Two posts a day with ONLY a sprinkling of suggestions might help, too. It does make it easier for me to try and help out when there is a surname or a surname stand-in. That seems like a reasonable requirement.
The suggestion of having a FAQ page where you address how to predict the popularity of a name, how to get a spouse involved in the naming process, etc. is an excellent idea.
Thanks for all you do! I visit this site at least once a day.
I will throw in a vote for whatever lets you continue to include your input along with the question. (At least, that’s why I wrote in – I wanted to hear your ideas!)
I say definitely make the last name (or a stand-in) and single-gender suggestions a priority.
And upon reading the comments: A FAQ page! I love it! I think that would solve some things that have to be said (popularity, etc.) over and over.
I want to see all the posts as I anxiously await to see my question answered :) I am due at the end of October!
I can help a little. I wrote a while ago requesting help and think we have settled on a name. You can take Evangeline Robinson off the list (sister of North – due in Dec). We are going to go with Patience as the middle name. Good luck with the high demand. You know this just means YOU ROCK right?
Thanks,
Vanessa
I too am waiting for a question to be answered, and I would rather have it posted with no response from Swistle than not posted at all.
My email might not fit some of the criteria some people have suggested, but I feel it posses an interesting delima and is worth attention! My first email was answered in July when we had our second daughter. We are pregnant again and still want to use our boy name but my husbands brother is trying to steal it! His baby is due around October 15th. I wrote asking for help naming our nephew so we can keep our boy name! Or who knows, maybe we would like another suggestion better. Point being, putting too many stipulations on what letters will or will not be answered can limit some great posts!
Oh that’s another good idea listed above, your automatic response could request that if the reader ends up naming their child before you post their issue they should email you and ask that their question be removed. Maybe your auto reply and the FAQ section of the blog could have a description of the process you typically go through when choosing a name and the resources you use, baby name wizard etc.. That might lead to more people naming their baby without needing an issue posted.
You know you could also always charge people (pay pal) to get your input…otherwise their entry just gets posted for our suggestions.
Only post those with last names, or at least sibling names. I hate the ones that don’t give any info, only like their top three choice so far.
I agree with @The Shwant Family’s suggestion of posting a poll when just asking for narrowing down of choices, the original email for commenters and then responding to your favorite once per week. :)
A couple of months ago, I looked through 60 Name Updatea, curious about how much the parents who wrote for name help were influenced by Swistle or other responders. I found that the vast majority of parents went with names that were already in their lists of favorite names. About 10 couples chose a name that never came up on this website. Just 5 parents used a name suggested by Swistle, and 8 were influenced by other posters’ comments to choose a name. Thus, it seems that the biggest role this website may be playing is helping parents choose among names they already like and/or reinforcing that a certain name(s) they like would be a good one for their child.
The Schwant Family- What a good idea, to have a FAQ! I do sometimes feel like I’m answering the same questions.
Patricia- I like your idea of an auto-response. Yes, I answer all the posts myself now. The ad brings in enough to buy new baby name books, but not enough to be an income. I’m not sure how people find it: some of them say they heard from a friend, but most don’t say.
Anon 2:39– I should clarify that I don’t mean the criteria (need surname, boy or girl only, etc.) would apply to ALL questions, just the ones that want help choosing a name. “Baby Naming Issue: ___” questions wouldn’t require information like surname if it weren’t necessary to answer the question.
I would rather see all questions even if you don’t give your analysis. I don’t think you should skip any, and I don’t mind if you post some without any commentary and just let the commenters contribute.
I’d love to see them all either way. And my first thought was also a helper. Could be fun! Train up a new generation ;)
I think more posts would be awesome- not annoying at all.
And I love the thought of adding a helper. That way, you’re not bogged down with TONS of questions.
Marla @ http://www.asthefarmturns.wordpress.com
I find your site quite addictive and would be happy with one or two posts a day. I don’t mind the ones with no comment from you, even though you are usually spot on with your advice – obviously you have your own life too!
I have wondered just how many of your posters end up using a name suggested by your or a reader?
Perhaps just to get things under control again you should put up all of Octobers babies posts this week and let the readers have a go, and then carry on with the November babies in your usual way.
Good luck, you provide a great service.
so, as a person who has recently written in and is eagerly awaiting a response (Del. Date 10/18), I think I have an idea that might be helpful. I have noticed that I have started to read and respond here much more frequently (hourly?) since I submitted my question. I’d like to think I may thought that by offering advice to others that Karma might deliver the perfect name to me in the process, or at least have you decide that I was worthy of a response. (I know, I’m crazy & hormonal – forgive me). Anyway, you need help giving help, so what about some sort of swap system, where if you want to get your question posted, you have to first prepare thoughtful responses to 3-5 questions? I know I’d be willing!
That also leaves you free to cherry-pick your favorites as well as leave comments on others when/where you choose and as your time allows. Also, the FAQ is a great idea too.
I have written to you twice, first about my 2nd baby’s name, as well as a follow up post about said baby’s name’s popularity (Henry)and I can’t tell you how much I appreciated your feedback as well as that of your readers. You offer a great service to us and I think you should do what you feel is right. I have no problem with you just posting a question without a reply and letting your readers weigh in, I think it would be a great option. When I initially read your post I was thinking you should have a helper, but this is your baby and I think you should keep it that way. My vote is for you to respond to the ones you want/are able, to and post the rest for your wonderful readers to assist with. Keep it as easy as that. Good luck!
Angie
I’d be in favor of deleting any letters that don’t give a last name (or an approximation of it, which is fine). I find I can’t even think about what name would be good for a particular family if I don’t know their last name. It seems essential to know that.
The exception would be a more general questions, such as “Do you think the name “Horseradish” would be too Out There or is it cute?” That kind of question works find without last name given.
As far as finding a helper, you have several commenters who are very skilled at finding great names for specific situations. As much as we love to hear from The Swistle herself, I think it’s fine to open it up just to your commenters from time to time. Although … if I wrote the letter, I guess I’d feel bad if I didn’t get even ONE Swistle suggestion. Maybe just one Swisle name without further comment? — or would that be as time-consuming as finding a list of them?
I absolutely think people need to include some sort of Surname!! I get SO annoyed and don’t even both continuing to read/comment if they haven’t. In school, work, etc they are constantly going to be called by their first and last name and if we can’t see how the 2 will sound together there is almost no point.
I don’t mind polls.
I love reading the posts where you comment so if it’s a weekend post without your input that’s fine, but I really hope you continue to give your input during the week!
Didn’t read the comments but here’s a suggestion that might be off the wall: start charging for your service…some modest amount…or suggest a “donation” and prioritize those who donate. Sort of elitist maybe but babies are expensive any way you slice it and a few bucks for solid advice? totally worth it. that way you get fewer folks and only committed folks and some money to boot. I’d pay $10 for a personalized swistle + readership naming input.
Otherwise I say you be selective with what you post (and/or limit what advice you can offer) as I would get burnt out with too many per day.
First let me say that I love your site and have enjoyed it for well over a year now. I’m not a fan of posting naming questions with no commentary. I really enjoy your thoughtful take on each query, and it’s always disappointing to me to see one posted without it. I don’t mind polls, though.
I say be selective with what you post (require a surname or stand-in) and consider charging a nominal fee. I’d pay $10 for sure, plus that might weed out the people who basically know the name they’re going to pick and just need you to say, “Yes, do it!” You could continue to post “free” questions without commentary, but I feel like there are plenty of message boards already where people can ask for name input from the masses.
I agree with the FAQ area suggestion in the comments above.
The idea of guest bloggers is also interesting I think. There are a few regular “commenters” who typically provide excellent advice and maybe you could enlist the occasional help of them?
Requiring the surname and basic info should be a must. Otherwise, it becomes too difficult/vague, right?
Polls are great (and probably easy) for people just searching for a decision between several names.
Bottom line – I think you should reply to the inquiries that interest you. For the ones that you feel that you have answered a million times, maybe submit that to a guest blogger or just have the “community” do suggestions.
Though I am disappointed when you don’t give your advice, if I was to write in, I would rather you post it without a personal reply than not at all. :)
Good luck! And I love your blog!!
Swistle,
I love that this baby naming blog has become so popular that you are so busy! How fun!
I love the posts and love the naming, so I say post them all and you comment on the ones that you can manage. I especially try to comment on the posts where you don’t leave a response, but sometimes, there is so many comments, I feel like all my ideas are mixed in them all. Lots of great comments coming in.
So I’m game for more postings…
Swistle, my dear, you are getting popular! This is the point, I think, when most bloggers would expand their empire – bring in new contributors, or bump up the ads and make it a full time gig. But I think the magic of the site is YOUR suggestions, which are always so spot-on, and so I’m not sure how I’d feel about a contributor.
As a couple people have mentioned above, I actually think charging for your advice would be a good idea. I think you could do it in a way that you’ll still try to answer everyone’s questions even if they don’t pay, but those who do pay would get a guaranteed Swistle response. I think 5 or 10 bucks would be perfectly reasonable, and totally worth it. Maybe $5 to get on a priority list, and $10 for a totally guaranteed response?
I just know that if I were to write you, I would be SO SO SO excited to get your response (I’ve been a loyal reader forever) and I’d be totally bummed (like, crushed) if my question were skipped or posted without a response (seriously, I’ve been dreaming of my very own Swistle post for so long!), so I’d love some way to ensure that I would get a response.
That said, I would much rather you post a question without your input than not post it at all. Naming puzzles are too fun to skip over entirely! And no, I could never get worn out on name helping – bring it on! If you do decide to choose some criteria for skipping posts entirely, I think requiring a last name or last name stand-in is reasonable. I don’t like the idea of helping only with one gender or the other, unless there get to be so many queries that it’s absolutely necessary. If it counts for anything, my favorite posts are the ones where there are a ton of criteria to meet, because they really feel like puzzles, where you know that THE name is out there somewhere, and you just have to find it!
Whew, look at me, writing you a novel! Don’t mind me… :)
Yesterday (Oct. 10) you posted three letters from parents asking for your help with their baby’s name, which you gave and several of us commented on. BUT these three babies are due within a weeks time, so I’m wondering if we were too late to help any of these parents. This has come up a few times recently when there has been an update or other mention of someone writing to you and already having had their baby by the time their letter was posted. I hope once you catch up you’re able to post the letters *at least* a month before due dates so it’s more worth your time — and ours — to thoughtfully respond to these parents.
Patricia- This is exactly the reason I wrote this post: YES I think it’s too late to help, and as you can see, I mention in the post that my goal is to be far enough ahead to help. The problem is that there are so many questions, I CAN’T catch up and CAN’T get ahead. And so the question I’m asking in the post is what would people like to see me do about that: delete more? or post more without answers?
Delete more. YOUR voice is what is interesting here. It’s not as fun to read the posts that don’t have YOUR answers. People can’t reasonably expect that you will put EVERY letter you get up on your blog. As your popularity continues to grow, this will become mathematically impossible. And you’ll end up with a blog that is just a string of posts/letters with no responses. It’ll cease to be YOUR blog, YOUR voice. And that’s why we all come in the first place. You rock.