Baby Boy B_____ema

Brittany writes:

We are having our first baby, due September 27th and we are thrilled! My husband and I know we are very picky and view naming our child as a huge responsibility (and one we’re so happy to have). We quietly turn up our noses at pretty much every suggestion we’ve received from friends & family. That said, at least we’re sort of on the same page about what we’re looking for. I’m sure you’ve heard this before, but we want something on the less common side that isn’t too far ‘out there’. Even if I like a name on the top 10 list, I can’t stand the thought of naming my child the same name as his future classmates. Maybe this is because I have a very trendy name from back in my day. Even though we’re both picky, I seem to be the one suggesting name options and my husband is the one giving the veto vote. Our last name is a long dutch name that starts with a B and ends with -ema. We both really like the name Jack (my husbands favorite author is Jack Kerouac) and I find it adorable for all ages. Although it doesn’t meet our criteria for uncommon, and my husband would prefer it as a middle. But we find it timeless. We’ve seemed to have been drawn to Irish/Gaelic names such as Kaelan ( I love names with consecutive vowels) but due to the unsettling trend of the name being given to GIRLS these days, we’ve decided a strong ‘no’ against it. Side note: for a girl possibly someday, Eowyn, Aeris or Charlotte. Here is the short list of the few we’ve tossed around:
Kaelan (the girly issue)
Jasper/Jesper (vintage, but I’m worried about a strong Twilight association)
Grayson (my husband’s one suggestion that I find utterly boring! “son of gray haired man”)
Jax (I LOVE this name, but my husband give it a huge “no way”)
Callen (soft ‘a’ sound… we both got kind of bored with it after a while)
Easton (hubby gave a big veto)
Alistar/Alistair or some variation (we’re really drawn to it for some reason, but it’s a little too..’much’ to feel okay using)
Kai (recently found out an acquaintance is using this name, due within the same week)
Ellison
Alec (hubby vetoed)
Kael (too much like Kale greens?)
Jude/Judah (hubby vetoed)
Kellen (hubby vetoed)
Fin(n)ley/Fin(n)lay/Finn (the one name we both agree on, but can’t seem to nail down what we really want out of it. I usually think one should be given the name that will be used, even if it is considered a “nickname”, but I do like Finley as well as Finn so I think I could easily stand to use the full version and nickname in this situation. The issue then would be spelling. We considered whether or not we like just Finn by itself, but were never quite sure. So if he’ll be called Finn much of the time should we spell the full version with one N or two? And Finley happens to be more popular in the US as a girls name, which bothers me because I want a strong masculine name. Although maybe I should just forget it because it seems to be strongly masculine in it’s Irish origin. And what about the spelling Fin(n)lay. I’ve read that it’s pronounced the same as Finley, but will it be forever mispronounced? And is that even true? And the biggest question of all, is do we even love it, or is it the ‘best of the blah’?

As you can see we’re pretty far from naming our son, despite being weeks from his due date! We’re completely open to new suggestions beyond what we’ve listed!

At one point we thought meaning would be important to us, but I think we’re past that due to the extreme difficulty we’ve had finding ANYthing decent.

And “no” to the name Jackson (even though it has Jack in it)

Can you help us?! And is there any hope?

25 thoughts on “Baby Boy B_____ema

  1. beyond

    I really like Jasper, and especially Jesper for you, and I don’t associate the name with Twilight, though I have read the books.
    That said, I really like Fin(n)ley / Fin(n)lay / Finn as well. What about Finnigan / Finnegan? OR! Phineas?
    And are there any family names you might like to use for a mn?
    Good luck!

    Reply
  2. StephLove

    Well, I was all set to recommend Jackson until I got the end of the post so now I’m stumped. I might pursue the Finn-related names since you agree there. Phineas is my favorite of the ones suggested so far.

    I like Ellison from your list, too, and you have no parenthetical objections after it.

    Here are a few more that might work for you:
    Alexei
    Felix
    Matthias

    Reply
  3. Kit

    I personally love the names Kael and Finn just as they are. With a long last name, a short first name would be nice. Short names like this are also very masculine-sounding, whereas Kaelen and Finley seem more androgynous.

    Reply
  4. Michele

    How about Cade?

    Also, I’d avoid the name Finn (or any variation of it) if you’d like to spare your child the likelihood of sharing a name with his classmates. It’s hot, hot, hot right now!

    Reply
  5. Jenn

    Your like of
    Kaelen and Callen remind me of Colum or Calum (Callum)
    Kael and Kai remind me of Kyle (classic! no one uses it!)
    Kellen remindes me of Keenan
    How about Jonah instead of Judah?
    Jax reminds me of Dex, Dexter? Baxter?
    I think Finn and all it’s variations is getting very trendy right now. Not necessarily super popular, but hipster. It’s likely you will have another one in class.

    I really like Alistair on your list, and I don’t think it’s too much at all, but how do you feel about Callister? Calistair?
    But it also really sounds like you LOVE Jack and should maybe just use that. With a unique last name and maybe paired with a great middle name, maybe the common use won’t bother you so much. Once he is YOUR Jack, the others won’t matter.

    Reply
  6. Frazzled Mom

    You say you want to avoid trendy. In your post you use “trendy” and “popular” interchangeably, and personally I feel there is a difference. But I also feel the difference between “trendy” and “popular” is subjective so I won’t go there. Since you say you want to avoid trendy, perhaps you can get some ideas by asking yourselves these questions:

    Is this a name I feel I will always love or just a passing name-crush that could fad in 30 years time? (Hard to answer, I know).

    Would I be able to pick sibling names I like with this name?

    The second question is important even if you don’t plan to have any more children because it helps you differentiate between names that might be of a style you generally like vs. anomalies.

    For example, I don’t generally like androgynous names, especially for girls, but really like Tatum. Tatum is an anomaly for me. For that reason, I would never use Tatum on a daughter of mine because I would be compelled to name her sister something very feminine like Felicity, Cecilia, Susannah, etc., and the names wouldn’t work together on sisters. This is all hypothetical since I am done having children, but I am trying to help you with your decision making process. Perhaps this may seem moot if you don’t want any more kids, but personally I would be more likely to feel satisfied long-term with a name that fits my general style, and maybe you will too. If nothing else, you are prepared for any unplanned future children.

    Good luck.

    Reply
  7. Christine

    You’ve gotten some good suggestions. I know you say you want something “masculine” but since a lot of names listed have softer sounds, maybe Julian? I know my husband and I were putting names out there after I mentioned I like Jude (which he vetoed) and it was one of the few he liked. I don’t know about it’s current popularity, but it doesn’t seem to be popping up all over the place, unlike Finn and its variations.

    Others you might like, Silas, Elliot, Cormac, Cullen.

    When in doubt, maybe print out some of the popular Irish name lists and have your husband pick out a bunch and that way you can go through them together.

    Good luck!

    Reply
  8. Karen L

    Eamon. Irish, double vowel, solidly boy, pronounced AY-mun.

    I actually logged in to go suggest this on another post, but I think it fits here even better!

    Also, having Jack as a mn is great because you could do -J nicknames.

    I love Alistair. I don’t think it’s too much at all.
    Alistair Jack. AJ.

    Reply
  9. Carla

    It is sooo hard these days to find purely masculine names that are not high in popularity. I named my son Sawyer (born in Feb.) and since then that people are suggesting it as a girl’s name!! Then again back when Morgan/Jordan/Taylor were starting to be used as girls names I thought that weird and now it sounds normal) Some names are definitely more feminine than others. I say if you really like it go with it.
    Kael or Kaelen are my favourites of your list that are not super popular.
    Good luck!

    Reply
  10. Jess

    Here are some more ideas:

    — Gordon. It’s Scottish. It’s #946 in the US, so you don’t have to worry about your son having several in his classes. This feels traditional and manly to me.

    — Phillip. This just seems clasic, yet underused to me. #305.

    — Wade. Just seems like it falls into the Jude, Jasper, Easton category.

    Good luck!

    Reply
  11. The Mrs.

    Your list brings to mind another possibility:

    Ruston Jack B_____ema

    (nickname could be Russ or Rusty… or RJ… if Jack is his middle name).

    If it matters, folks where we live in the US are naming their GIRLS Grayson/Greyson/Gracyn/Graycin.

    Also, if Alistar/Alistair peeks your interest, what about MacAllister? His nickname could be Mac or Cal or Al… it’s all quite Scottish, and it gives a little extra beef to the name.

    Best wishes to your family!

    Reply
  12. Megz

    I’ve always liked the name Kieran. You might like this rather than Kaelan (which I agree is very much like Kaylyn).

    Or how about Keegan, Campbell or Connor.

    Reply
  13. Anonymous

    I don’t know much about Twilight, apart from the fact that good vintage names are being appropriated! But. If Jasper is too vampired, how about Kaspar/Caspar/Casper? Are variants, I believe.

    Reply
  14. Susan

    I suggest Hendrik, which is Dutch rather than the Irish/Gaelic you’re most drawn to, but it has a cool current sound while being uncommon. And it’s strong and would never be used as a girl name. Not to mention it would probably sound totally great with your last name.

    Another Dutch possibility is Derk — uncommon, strong, and masculine.

    Willem has a softer sound while still being masculine, and it has some of the sounds you are drawn to.

    Happy name hunting!

    Reply
  15. Anonymous

    I love Grayson Jack. Also, instead of Callen, what about Callum? It has the same sound, but may be a little more interesting instead of Allen with a C. I, too, love Finn, but I believe Finley is a more feminine name. And kaelan is definitely too girly. Ahhhh! So, my vote is Grayson Jack, that way, you both win. Best wishes :)

    Reply
  16. Emily

    I love a lot of your choices, so I thought I’d pipe in on this. I was determined to name my son (now 6) Finn… but hubby did not like. I was sure I’d pulled a fast one on him when he agreed (and loved) the name Griffin. I was convinced we’d call him Finn… but alas, he is our Griff. Maybe this works for you?

    Reply
  17. Adey

    On of the main characters on NCIS LA is named Callen and I have definitely been drawn to that name!

    I like a lot of these suggestions (Grayson, Declan, Cade, etc)

    As much as I like the name Kaelan (and I do!) I admit unless you know the spelling you are going to think it’s a girls name because sooo many girls are named that now. I’d suggest either just Kael or not at all.

    How about Desmond? I LOVE this name and think it sounds a lot like some names that have been suggested.

    Good luck!

    Reply
  18. Mrs. Haid

    I like Grayson. I also like Desmond and Jonah.

    I think most of your K and C names are easily misspelled. Would it bother you to see your child’s name misspelled on school forms or the mail? I think it would bother me.

    I also think Finn is a trendy name because of GLEE. I had a son born before I’d seen the show and wanted to name him Finn (like Phineas in the book A Separate Peace). Now I love the TV show and think people would assume I named a child after it. Also, there is some kids’ show about Finnias and Ferb… Which makes me wonder if you’d like your child to share a name with a character other kids think is popular?

    Reply

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