Ashley writes:
I am due with a baby girl in 4 days and my husband and I are still undecided on a name. About a month ago we narrowed it down to either Ava or Rowan. We love both names equally, but for different reasons. I had originally fallen in love with the name Ava because it is short, sweet, feminine sounding, but strong and not too girly for my tastes. Once I did some research and found out how popular it is though, it lost some of it’s appeal for me. Then we came across the name Rowan and learned that it has many interesting meanings and associations with it- being a tree traditionally thought to bring good luck, and a Celtic name for the full moon in February, which is exactly when she’s due. We are very nature-oriented people.I thought- perfect! But, it sounds harsher to me, and I am afraid we will constantly encounter people saying, “Isn’t that a boys name?” Or “hmm, that’s a different name.” Two other considerations….we have a very difficult to spell last name (so not sure if a gender-neutral name like Rowan will add to the confusion), and I’ve always wanted to give my daughter the middle name of Mae, after my grandmother who I was very close to. The combinations we are talking about are either Rowan Mae or Ava Rowan….Ava Mae was on the table for a while, but I’m not sure I like the combination of two 3-letter names…they sound a little too similar to me. I love both name combinations, but we are torn between choosing a name with a lot of meaning behind it, or one that we just think sounds really beautiful….any suggestions? Help!!
This is going to sound like a really, really lame suggestion, but I’m going to suggest it anyway: I suggest choosing the one you like better. I know, right? Lame? But! When naming my own children, I had to have this revelation several times. I’d be debating the relative merits of two names, this one or that one, this one or that one—and then I would think, “Well…which one do I LIKE BETTER?” and it was as if it were a BRAND-NEW concept for me each time. As someone who has made a hobby of baby names, I think I sometimes get distracted by my lists of pros and cons.
I can offer pure opinions, if you like, but of course those are only about what _I_ like better. Still, it’s fun, so I’ll do it. Here are my opinions:
1. I think the name Rowan is beautiful, and a solid choice, and unusual without being TOO unusual.
2. I think the name Ava is beautiful, and a solid choice, and its popularity wouldn’t rule it out for me.
3. I like the combination Ava Mae. I think it would be fun to call her “Ava Mae,” too, as a nickname or when there’s more than one Ava in the room. I like “Ava Mae” better than “Ava Rowan.”
4. I like the combination Rowan Mae. I think it ups the femininity of the name Rowan, without being a style clash.
[Edit: You know, I’ve had another thought about how to make a decision. Think of what names you might want to use in the future, and see whether Ava or Rowan sounds better with those names. If you love the boy name Ryan, perhaps that’s a reason to go with Ava instead of Rowan. If you love the girl name Aoife (pronounced almost like Eva), perhaps that’s a reason to go with Rowan instead of Ava. Even if you’re planning to have one child and no more, this is a helpful exercise to see which name better lines up with your tastes.]
A poll will, of course, only show you what other people like better—but again, fun, so let’s do it. I’ll put a poll over to the right [poll closed; see below], and everyone can choose which name they prefer, Ava or Rowan.
Poll results (266 votes total):
Ava: 122 votes, roughly 46%
Rowan: 144 votes, roughly 54%
Name update 02-17-2009! Ashley writes:
Thanks for your help! The poll and everyone’s comments were really helpful. Little Rowan Mae was born on February 9, the day of the full “Rowan Moon!”
Ava Mae is a gorgeous name. I’d call her that as a rule, not even just Ava… it’s so pretty! Go with your gut, not with the popularity charts.
But you could also look at other Ava-esque names. Eva, Eve, Evie — these were all on my preliminary baby name list for my own little girl due this month ;) Or play it up — Evangeline/Evangelina! (I can’t think of any “Ava-” names unless you start toying with the spelling on “Eva-” names)
I do like the name Rowen too. They’re both beautiful choices. Good luck and congratulations on your impending arrival!
Ava Mae is cute, but I agree with Ashley. I think the 2 short names don’t work as well together. It sounds good, but in looks is lacking something. I like the name Rowan. As long as you’re not opposed to a more gender neutral name, I saw go with Rowan Mae. It looks cute and would be adorable for a little girl. I love the you adore the meaning behind it too. The meaning is what made me fall more in love with my son’s name. Plus I think it’s a bit less popular, so if that’s what your concerned about too it would be a good fit.
Ava Mae is great! With them both being short, you could even call her Ava Mae … which would make it a little different from just Ava.
The only Rowan I know is a boy. I think it is gender-neutral, but it does side with boys a bit.
My kids have names that people don’t usually hear … so people always think they’re Conner or Caden. I wouldn’t change their names, but it does get old. It’s a legitimate concern to wonder if people will say, “That’s different” or “Isn’t that a boy’s name?”
I love Ava Mae…love it! The only Rowen I know is a boy, although girls have been taking boy names and making them their own for years. When my son was born, we had two names picked out, one common (the one we really loved) and other other, more unusual that we didn’t love as much. We were leaning towards the unusual one for the entire pregancy but after he was born, we went with the our favorite. He really likes his name and thanks us for not naming him the other. We have no regrets.
Ava Mae is almost irresistible -it is an adorable name combo!-, but personally I know and have heard of way too many Ava/Eva’s. I’d veto it because of the popularity thing, but that’s just me.
I also LOVE Rowan. I know a boy named Rowan, but I had it on my list for a girl name. I don’t think it’s harsh… a strong name yes, but not too masculine. I think it’s sweet for a girl’s name and I love the meaning you’ve found in it for you guys.
I love both names so much it’s hard to pick one. Ava has always been one my favorites. Rowan, to me, is both strong and sweet. Classy too.
I think Ava Mae is great. Much much better than Ava Rowan.
I love Rowan! It’s great for a “nature-oriented” family like yours. Rowan Mae is beautiful!
I wouldn’t worry about it sounding too harsh or masculine. I know it depends on the person, but I think of it as a girl’s name.
I had a student once named Rowan, and she was just about my favorite ever. What a great kid! I have really positive associations with the name and I like that the meaning seems to connect with you.
When I first got my class list with a Rowan, I assumed she was a girl, too, for what that’s worth.
Of the two choices, I think Ava by far is much prettier. Rowan does seem masculine to me, mostly due to the similarity to Owen. Personally, Ava’s popularity does bother me. Every time I meet another little Ava, I think, “oh there’s another Ava.” But you may not mind that.
I’m going to go off the beaten path here and suggest Mae for a first name. I think this is an ideal option for you because you spoke of your grandmother in the past tense, which leads me to believe she is no longer living and there will be no issues with confusions. Secondly, you said you like nature name and Mae sounds like the month of May which reminds me of spring and nature.
I agree with you that two 3 letter names don’t look right together. Maybe you could use Rowan as the middle name. I think almost anything goes in the middle name spot, and therefore you will not need to be as concerned with others confusing Rowan as a boy. That settles it – Mae Rowen! Perfect solution! (Pats myself on back, and treats myself to some coffee.)
Oh, there is also Rowena, which sort of sounds like Rowen, but is more feminine. But I don’t think Rowena has the same meaning you like. I still prefer Mae Rowen.
I have to say, I don’t really understand why people are so afraid of multiple middle names. Our daughter has two middle names and while they’re no hyphenated saying her full name without one or the other just never sounded right to us.
What about Ava Rowan Mae?
Oh! Great idea Anonymous! Why now Ava Mae Rowan? Then it’s possible to use Ava Mae, or Ava, or Ava Mae Rowan.
Great idea.
I really like Ava Mae. I think it’s beautiful…and popularity is really geographical, I think. I don’t know a single baby girl named Ava. (And I haven’t read more than 2 or 3 in the births section of the two local papers.)
Perhaps it matters where you live?
I vote for Ava Mae Rowan. :)
Bethtastic stole my idea!! I was going to suggest Ava Mae Rowan. I like both Rowan and Ava Mae (I know 2 baby Ava’s, so it is popular at least around me). Mae as a first name is quite pretty too.
Here’s an idea: what about the name Maeve? I know Swistle has talked about it before. It combines Mae and Ava, it’s very feminine and looks nice with Rowan.
Rowan Maeve.
Just a thought if you’re into using different varieties!
I vote for Ava Mae. I think it’s gorgeous!!!
Mae is my middle name as well (it was my great-grandmother’s name), I think it’s such a lovely middle name!
And Ava is a favourite name of mine!! I keep hearing it’s SO popular… but I’ve never actually MET an Ava… so really, I wouldn’t always put much stock into that unless you’ve met many Ava’s in your area.
I like Ava much more than Rowan, so my vote lies there!
I like both Ava and Rowan. Both are strong, evocative names with a lot of style. The current popularity of Ava, though, and the fact that the writer already has qualms about its popularity, made me vote for Rowan. There are many Avas in my 4-year-old daughter’s peer group here in the upper Midwest.
I also love the suggestion of Maeve!
Ava Mae!!!
Ava Mae immediately made me think of Ave Maria (the song/music). I’m not Catholic. I don’t think this is a negative thing but thought I’d point it out.
I don’t think Rowan is too masculine or unusual. Rowan Mae sounds perfect to me.
I like the idea of incorporating your grandmother’s name into the name you’ll be calling your daughter a lot of the time: thus, Ava Mae or Maeve, as suggested above (Maeve Rowan?). I think Ava Mae flows better than Rowan Mae.
Maeve!!