One week from today is the U.S. presidential election. Two days ago I got the campaign merchandise I ordered on September 12th. It feels too late to do anything with it. Not that I think it would have had any effect on anything, if I’d had it earlier.
Yesterday I went to work feeling normal, but as the shift progressed I felt increasingly low and tired and listless. I came home, sat down in a comfy chair, and didn’t get up again for over four hours. A couple of those hours involved sleeping, and I am not normally a napping person. I didn’t have lunch, and I am normally a person who eats all her usual meals. Either I am coming down with something (possible), or I am electionsick (likely).
Four years ago I got stress hives from Octoberish through Januaryish. Four years later I am still taking a daily Zyrtec to prevent them, but CAN THAT TINY DAM POSSIBLY HOLD.
I mailed Halloween care packages to the twins, fueled entirely by a wave of adrenaline as I realized I was about to miss the deadline to do it. Last year I included a bunch of fun things (mini black cat backpack/keychain fobs! maple leaf string lights! nail stickers!) and used up the extras sending packages to a few of their friends, but this year I was not up to any of that. I filled two boxes with candy; I mailed them.
I’ve been sending Postcards to Voters. It feels ridiculous and futile; I’m still doing it. But it looks like today is the last day for that.
It is really awful, low lying misery and worry. I don’t know what else we can do, just wait it out. I guess at least we have each other?
The next week is going to be so exhausting. I had to delete Facebook off my phone today because the urge to spend my day rage-commenting had become too great and I have actual work to do. I want to feel hopeful but I remember how it felt That Night in 2016 and I get so worried. I am so worried. Solidarity, sisters.
I’ve got a mild case of election sickness, but expect it to get progressively worse over the next week. I’ll need to do yoga once I start feeling really anxious. I’m trying to keep love and optimism in my heart, but that’s kind of aspirational now. I’m thinking of Michelle Obama and what she said about taking the high road. I’m wondering how some of my neighbors are voting and am trying to keep feelings of rage, anger, and judgement at bay. I was so unprepared and naïve in 2016 and don’t want to feel that despair and grief again.
One candidate lifts up and supports people; the other is anti-people, both personally and professionally. Why is this race even close?
It’s the CLOSENESS that really has me down. This should be a landslide. Why are so close to half these people so very wrong?
You’re doing great! Drops are going IN the bucket. Good thing you already formulated your election plan.
We shouldn’t have to live like this, but our sad reality is that (terrible) other people make it so that we do. I hate it so much.
When I need distraction from dread, my go-tos are mindless chores, comforting movies (without commercials), a manicure, a meal with friends. I also admit that sometimes I just need to make a day be finished by going to bed earlier. I may play Sudoku on my phone to help get my eyes tired if I’m not sleepy.
But yeah. I’m in one day at a time mode. I might be in one hour at a time mode by the weekend. I’ve never tried edibles but this truly doesn’t feel like the time to start. I may work on some holiday baking or freezer meals with my angst, if I’m able.
I wrote 200 postcards for voters. If I’d known I would get done with that six weeks early, and if stamps were cheaper, I would’ve ordered 300. I received two postcards in the mail from the same pac, which was actually quite fun even if it was wasted on someone who votes every election. My household has gotten a total of four handwritten postcards so far from different groups.