Today I am in the mood to talk about the list of potential perimenopause symptoms I saw in a book. Those of us in perimenopause could talk about which symptoms we have, and those of us past perimenopause could talk about which ones they had. But I was reading the book while at the library, so I don’t have it here with me; it was a new release, and the new releases are like debutantes: they never get more attention than when they’re on the new-release shelf. So I like to leave them to it, and check them out when they have aged out and are far less popular. I’m not enjoying this metaphor anymore.
I wondered if by any chance the “read a sample” portion of the book on Amazon would happen to have that symptom list AND IT DID. So here is the list, from the book The New Menopause by Mary Claire Haver, MD, which I am definitely going to check out and finish reading in a couple of months:
acid reflux / GERD
acne
alcohol tolerance changes
anxiety
arthralgia (joint pain)
arthritis
asthma
autoimmune disease (new or worsening)
bloating
body composition changes / belly fat
body odor
brain fog
breast tenderness/soreness
brittle nails
burning sensation in the mouth/tongue
chronic fatigue syndrome
crawling skin sensations
decreased desire for sex
dental problems
depression
difficulty concentrating
dizzy spells
dry or itchy eyes
dry mouth
dry skin
eczema
electric shock sensations
fatigue
fibromyalgia
frozen shoulder
genitourinary syndrome
headaches
heart palpitations
high cholesterol / high triglycerides
hot flashes
incontinence
insulin resistance
irritable bowel syndrome
irritability
itchy ears
itchy skin
kidney stones
memory issues
menstrual cycle changes
mental health disorders
migraines
mood changes
muscle aches
night sweats
nonalcoholic fatty liver disease
osteoporosis
pain with intercourse
sarcopenia (muscle loss)
sleep apnea
sleep disturbances
thinning hair (on head)
thinning skin
tingling extremities
tinnitus
TMJ (temporomandibular disorder)
unwanted hair growth (whiskers)
urinary tract infections
vaginal dryness
vertigo
weight gain
wrinkles
Well, HELL!—as an elderly client of mine used to exclaim if presented with too many things at once. This is like the flip side of when you try to look online to find out why your feet are so frequently cold, and you get everything from “Because you need to turn up the thermostat a degree and put on warmer socks, genius, maybe walk around a little from time to time” to “Brace for imminent death.”
We don’t have to talk about ALL the things we might or might not be experiencing / have experienced. My parents and brother read this blog, so, you know. I’m not going to be SHARING-sharing.
But I will say that I am definitely noticing weight gain and, much more importantly, weight redistribution: the center of my typical weight range is only up maybe five pounds, so all my clothes should still fit fine; it’s the SHIFTING AROUND that’s causing me enormous wardrobe complications. My waistbands don’t fit! If I am experiencing irritability, perhaps it is because I am being uncomfortably squeezed all the time! I am experimenting with finding new clothing options, but I am feeling surly about it and not making much progress yet.
I was diagnosed with acid reflux / GERD in my forties, so I don’t know if that’s perimenopause-related or not. But it has been getting worse lately. I have a swallowing issue sometimes; commenter Ess referred to this as “cat throat,” and I have thought of it that way ever since. It used to happen only very very infrequently; now it happens much more commonly. I am also more likely to need a second dose of my daily medication.
JOINT PAIN. Yes.
I have had a few mild and fleeting feelings of vertigo over the last few months, and hadn’t had any idea it could be associated with perimenopause.
Dry eyes, yes. I didn’t know those could be a perimenopause thing.
I used to get UTIs pretty regularly, but in recent years had not; now they are back.
ITCHY EARS!! YES!! My friend Surely told me about that one!
Sleep disturbances: yes yes yes. Waking up early and not being able to get back to sleep; or waking up what feels like about every ten minutes for the last few hours of the night. And more recently, night sweats. Not terrible drenching ones, but quite dampening.
Wrinkles, yes, hello. A sudden acceleration, especially on the throat and around the eyes. The ones on the forehead are digging in deeper, and are obvious even if I am not raising my eyebrows which apparently I do a million times a day.
Anxiety and depression, well, it’s hard to say. Those have been ongoing for decades. It’s hard to say if they’re worse. And if they are worse, it’s hard to say if it’s because of perimenopause or if it’s because of the ongoing/impending situations with United States politics.
I don’t grow my fingernails long, but I’ve noticed them chipping/breaking before the point at which I’d usually trim them.
I have noticed that I smell a little funny sometimes, and that my deodorant doesn’t seem to work as well as before, but I’d wondered if that was because of adrenaline at work: I LIKE working at the desk, but it’s definitely a more up-energy role.
Incontinence, yes. Increasing over the years. I am going to address that this year, to see what can be done. The little strength-training workout has 30 seconds of jumping jacks, and I pee my pants a little bit each time, which is discouraging. I wear a liner every day now (I use the cloth ones from SugarMonkies, and I am dismayed to see her shop has permanently closed; let me know if you have had good experiences with another cloth pad).
Fatigue: who can say what causes what? Life can be tiring. I am getting older. I am sick of doing the same old chores over and over again.
I get only the occasional single chin-hair, but the entire lower half of my face now gets Noticeably Downy with fine, light peach fuzz.
My cycles are still pretty regular. I haven’t skipped one yet, or had anything else surprising happen. My PMS is worse, though, accompanied by new bloating, and I also get PMS symptoms mid-cycle. I don’t seem to be getting hot flashes, unless night sweats are from hot flashes I’m sleeping through.
I have been talking for a long time. Would you like a turn?
I have been past menopause for a couple of years now and boy, would I like to weigh in here.
My three biggest symptoms now that I’m through the worst of it are (1) hot flash/panic attacks, (2) brain fog, and (3) UTIs. I don’t have daily hot flashes any more, but I consistently wake up 10-15 minutes after falling asleep at night feeling like I am dying of a hot heart attack, panicking for no reason. It’s a hoot. But thankfully it subsides quickly and I can go back to sleep.
The brain fog is mainly just not being able to remember words good. Frustrating, but not debilitating.
The UTIs, though. That’s been a surprise and a struggle. I tried estrogen pills (made me want to unalive either myself or someone else), estrogen inserts (caused a weird internal reaction that the doctor had never seen before), and now I’m taking D-mannose daily and that seems to be doing the trick, so two thumbs up for that. Everyone should be aware that cipro (antibiotic) can cause terrible, life-long side effects, so if you get a UTI and your doctor prescribes that on the first go-round you should definitely ask for another med and possibly find another doctor.
On the positive side, it’s nice not having to deal with periods or worry about a surprise pregnancy. And while I’m here, I heartily recommend the Reddit sub r/Menopause. It is a great place to get answers from a supportive community.
Re the UTIs, I have had the same huge upswing in them since menopause. My dr put me on an estrogen cream that seems to help with the UTIs. I was getting one about every month and now I’m down to just one this year. I wasn’t super excited to apply a cream down there, but I only use it once a week and its not too messy. Plus it helps A LOT with the dryness.
I definitely had heavy periods and waking up at 4am insomnia in my 40s. I had undiagnosed endometriosis and had my uterus and ovaries yeeted in the fall of 2015 (painful, complicated ovarian cyst got me on that track), so I went into instant menopause at age 46. I had a couple of years of hot flashes afterward, also eczema and some brain fog/trouble concentrating. The biggest other symptom is not giving a %@&* about most mens’ opinions, which is all kinds of awesome!
I don’t KNOW if I’m in perimenopause (because a) I still take hormonal birth control that prevents a period, so who knows whether I would still get one and b) I mentioned some of the symptoms that SEEMED like perimenopause to my gyn at the last exam and she kind of pooh-poohed me for being “too young,” even though everything I read indicates that perimenopause encompasses a Wide Age Range, and also I am 43 not 25.) but I sure have a bunch of these symptoms.
Like you, it’s hard to know if the current fatigue and anxiety are new or just continuations of the same old.
Hot flashes, YES — although I have been getting those for years; they seem much more frequent and intense these days
Night sweats, YES
Sleep disturbances, YES — although to be fair I have never been A Good Sleeper
Acne, YES, including a recent diagnosis of rosacea (the pimply kind not the redness kind)
Joint pain, YES, to the point that I had convinced myself I had rheumatoid arthritis (fortunately no, according to the doctor)
Weight gain and fat redistribution around my middle, YES
Brain fog, memory problems, and trouble concentrating, YES
Wrinkles, dizziness, Noticeable Facial Downiness, YES
Also, I have always been prone to canker sores, and over the years they seem to flare up more frequently around the end of my cycle, and in the past six or so months they are AWFUL. So many and so huge and so painful. Is this perimenopause???
I listened to a book about perimenopause a few months ago that was illuminating but also kind of depressing, in that it focused so heavily on how there are so few health professionals who are educated about the topic that it’s very hard to find treatment.
It took me a couple of years to realize that the onset of a canker sore was a PMS symptom, a harbinger of shark week in 4-5 days. Now this did not start happening until I was in my mid-40’s. I do think it was also a perimenopause symptom, mostly because of my age when they started AND many of the other things I was experiencing that fall on this list.
“harbinger of shark week” LOL
I also was recently diagnosed with rosacea in my early 40s (the pimply kind). I let it get so bad before going to the dermatologist and was embarrassed about it all the time, and have been so grateful for the antibiotic that has cleared up the pimples, but not really the redness yet. Thank god for medical treatment.
Ugh same experience for me – I’m also 43 and asked my ob/gyn this year whether we could talk through my myriad of new life symptoms and potentially consider perimenopause as a cause, and got the same reply – “average onset” is 46 so I’m “too young.” How can 3 years below an AVERAGED VALUE mean we should not consider it…??
How can a doctor not know what average means!? I am flabbergasted!
I’ve been without a period for more than a year now and mostly it’s been okay. But the not sleeping was killing me. KILLING ME. And can I just say my game changer was: gabapentin. It took care of the hot flashes and I now sleep through the night. Zero side effects and it costs about two dollars for a 3-month supply. As a bonus: it helps with anxiety. Why doesn’t everyone get this? I want to shout it from the rooftops! Gabapentin! Hip hip, hooray!
I’ve read here for so long and never commented, so it feels weird that the first comment I’m going to leave is a little comedy video from the Baroness Von Sketch show (CBC Comedy Toronto). But I thought of it immediately, hope it also gives you a laugh if it’s new to you. If the link doesn’t work, give it a google – “Baroness Von Sketch Show Perimenopause”
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=t17sJAY1vro
Omgosh, I literally laughed out loud. “But…but…I wear a jean jacket!” :)
The link didn’t work for me but here’s another one to try:
https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=3551425548216594
Man…that’s quite the list.
I’m 45, so who knows if I am in perimenopause or not.
After a few years of very irregular periods (probably PCOS related), my cycles are back to the usual regularity, but are a lot lighter. But it does feel like things are going on in there (i.e. I usually feel a little funny about midway through cycle and 90% of the time if I open my period app, it claims I am ovulating).
I do have increasing acid reflux and have some weird thing where my throat seems to close while I am eating. It doesn’t happen often, but it does happen.
Incontinence–I haven’t had kids. But I do struggle with my weight and this has become a thing over the last year or so. And I’ve noticed that over the last several years, I can’t really ‘hold it’ any more. Once my body realizes it has to go, I HAVE TO go.
Heart papultations-I think this occurs every once in a while. Probably related to anxiety, my heart rate goes NUTS when I am at the doctor. Higher than it goes when I am exercising and higher than it goes for weeks at a time. I don’t feel particularly anxious about the doctor’s visits, but I can’t seem to calm the hell down.
Muscle aches–sometimes I’ll get up at night to go to the bathroom and my entire body hurts.
Wait…WUT…ASTHMA? Like, this whole thing has been worse because mther-fluffing menopause? How did I miss that on the list.
Ugh, itchy ears. The struggle is real.
Incontinence…I saw a meme awhile ago that fit: “When the bluetooth bladder hooks up with the home wifi toilet” Because sometimes it’s an emergency. That could be the alphabet brain though.
The amount of moisture that leaves the body is astounding. Everything is dry. E.v.E.r.Y.t.H.i.N.g.
Estrogen cream has helped with the rage and the hot flashes. On the shamazon, burgundy colored lid.
For me, sunlight and fresh air helps. I notice when I miss a day or two. Not just the exercise part though because sometimes it’s just standing on the deck for ten minutes or working in the garden.
I love the crowd-sourcing of symptoms and ideas!!!!
I’m definitely done with perimenopause but of all those symptoms, I had relatively few. The main ones being occasional (like rare) night sweats/hot flashes. My psoriasis had a field day (and is only now back to being sort of manageable) and my blood pressure and cholesterol went up (not significantly, but still). Now that I am firmly in menopause (much to the confusion – since I was on the “young” side – of my doctor – what do they know?) my weight is creeping up and re-distributing itself (much to my horror).
In my case, perimenopause was just a blip on the surface of life; thank God. Because looking at that list it could have been horrific.
Well. I have opinions on this matter.
I have been trying to convince my doctor(s) that I am in perimenopause. I am on the pill and they seem to shrug their sholders and basically say there’s nothing for that. :/
My symptoms:
Cycle now down to 4 days from a time where I was lucky if it was only 7
Night Sweats
Acne
Itchy ears (who knew?!?)
*Ahem* weight shifting – I was fine with boobs but stomache area is another matter. I have embraced it though and just went up a size or two and added more elastic to my repertoire.
Brain Fog – I HATE not being able to recall a word. This better go away soon.
Wrinkles
I have other symptoms on here but they are gifts from birth. LOL
That list is both depressing and validating – and helpful, because there are a couple that I hadn’t even really clocked except as a vaguely disturbing thing, like tingling extremities which I sort of assumed was MS or something else that would shortly land me in a wheelchair.
I would say the thing I hate the most is the belly fat. Mine has never been flat, but it feels out of control and nothing seems to address it. i’ve run hot for years, so that part sucks but is not really new. The brain fog is really annoying – I usually have really good recall of names, faces, books, tv shows, random facts from years ago. The other day I was trying to talk to my daughter about a Netflix series and I almost threw something I was so angry that I couldn’t remember anything.
I had a giant fibroid removed and a uterine ablation a few years ago, and I haven’t had a period since then, which is a massive relief since I felt like I couldn’t leave the house while bleeding. But it’s also tough to tell if I’m in perimenopause or moving into menopause.
So. At the end of 2022 they found a small spot of breast cancer. Due to another family member having a significant health crisis I had to postpone dealing with the cancer for a few months. Since the cancer was estrogen positive, my surgeon put me on estrogen blockers essentially throwing me into menopause. But my ovaries seem to still be making estrogen (we checked in Dec.), which can I just say why? I am 55 years old. My 2 kids are grown. I do not want another child.
Those estrogen blockers were like flipping a switch. I had a few manageable-ish perimenopause symptoms that I had dealt with for several years. But the blockers added another whole level. The hot flashes weren’t too bad but the joint pain and brain fog? Sweet baby Jesus. I’ve been trying to decide if I should mention the joint pain to my PCP next time I see her just to make sure it is the lack of estrogen and not something else.
As for the anxiety, anger and lack of sleep — that could be a perimenopause or it could just be my life at the moment. I have found that it is more difficult to fall back asleep after I get up to use the bathroom.
March of this year marked one year without a period which is usually what determines the move to menopause. Except that the only reason I’m not having periods is because of the estrogen blockers.
Looking at that list of symptoms — frozen shoulder? Seriously? I know it goes along with joint pain but it kind of feels like any symptom any woman ever mentioned has been thrown onto that list so a doctor could write it off as “perimenopause”. Kind of like if you are overweight, each and every complaint gets met with “lose weight”.
Totally have frozen shoulder and my doctor said “it happens often to…women you age”. It is terrible, i let it go for like a year thinking it would just heal itself and it hasn’t. The only good news is apparently even if you do nothing it does just eventually go away after about 2 years. Mine is better, but still twinges.
I was thrust into menopause with chemo. Before that I had occasional hot flashes – only around my thigh area. And I also had moments where I wanted to explode at anyone who was breathing wrong. (I just started taking brief walks to prevent a meltdown.) Now I’m on an estrogen blocker, so I do have more general hot flashes which are usually not bad. I have brain fog, but that could be due to bad sleep. My hair has started thinning, and the belly weight – which I never really had even after multiple kids – has arrived.
I know that I was having *occasional* hot flashes (which could, thinking back, be better described as warm flashes) back when I was 35 and onward. No brain fog (I was in university, so… Then I got particularly lumpy (cysts) ovaries, accompanied by a Big Fibroid, when I was 40. Due to multiple delays, of which some were my fault (moving from one Canadian province to another caused at least a two year delay), I didn’t gave the hysterectomy I needed until I was 46.
Then BAM! instant menopause.
So I started estrogen patches (don’t get me started on how hard it is to get estrogen patches), and I’m still using them age 60.
Still have night sweats +panic in the night. My anxiety is off the charts and I can’t cope with being alone+out-in-public. I *had* joint pain, but I’m keto (full time 8 years) and that fixed it. I gained 70lbs in that 6yrs waiting for surgery, and managed to lose half of it with the keto, but I’m stable for 2 years where I am weightwise.
Early menopause runs in my family. I started skipping periods in my mid-30s and by 41 was in full menopause. My cholesterol and weight jumped up. That suprised me the most. I had been the same weight more or less a few pounds for all my adult life. Gaining a lot of weight is not ideal given some cardiovascular diseases that run in my family. I haven’t been successful at keeping it off. I exercise a lot more and eat better than in my 20s but can’t control my cholestrol without a pill. The hot flashes are mostly better a few years out from menopause. Its frustrating that I never feel comfortable temperature-wise. Always a little too hot or too cold.
Weight redistribution (and maybe gain, who knows, I don’t weigh myself) is definitely a symptom for me. I have a wider waist and a soft little tum-tum now, which makes alllllll my pants fit weird. I actually had a fit and bought like six pair of new pants/ jeans because I CANNOT EVEN ANYMORE. The waistband cutting in to that soft little tum-tum made me feel like murdering someone.
In the past couple of years my menstrual cycle went from 35 days to 3 and a half weeks, but then I skipped a period last month, so maybe I’m heading for the end.
Breast tenderness for sure, also swelling in the days before my period.
Hot flashes and night sweats, but mostly when I’ve had alcohol, which I am sadly becoming much less tolerant to. MY WINE MY WINE MY WINNNNNNE. It wants to kill me.
Hair thinning – yes, but now I buy that expensive Nutrafol which is WORTH IT. I was having bald spots and it was really awful, but the supplement has made a difference. I wish it wasn’t so expensive, plus I have to pay shipping and exchange rate, which I hate.
My doctor told me I was at quite high risk for developing osteoporosis, so I have been doing a lot to mitigate that.
I still like sex, and I still get, ahem, results, but I feel like I could go a long time without initiating it.
That list would have scared me if I had read it before menopause, but if I had one of the stranger symptoms it would also have been good to know.
I had hot flashes and night sweats, not too severe, but enough so that existing disagreements with my wife about fans and AC in the bedroom became more pronounced. (She hit menopause a couple years before I did with no hot flashes.) I was also diagnosed with diabetes on the very same day I had my last period, so one year before menopause. I’d likely had it for a while, years maybe, as I wasn’t good about going to the doctor for a while there.
I’m basically turning into a dwarf, specifically Gimli.
My biggest issue besides the beard and the potato-shape and the anxiety is I’m guessing I have undiagnosed ADHD and probably have for my entire life. Everything my mom did since ~ age 40 (and still does to this day) makes more sense through the lens of ADHD + masking + hormonal bullshit.
I’m not sure if turning into my mom is better or worse than turning into Gimli. I’m so tired. Doing everything on Hard Mode because your brain won’t STFU is exhausting.
52, off the pill the last two years after three decades on it. Weight gain, chin hair, sleep disturbance, tingling hands. The anxiety/depression/PPDD are all a lifelong thing so whatever. I was promised getting off the pill would end my periods and I would lose weight and menopause LAUGHED HER BUTT OFF at that, Doc keeps suggesting uterine ablation but that will only stop the murderously long and heavy periods which come randomly. I’ve given up fighting the symptoms. Just head down and hope for the best.
… yeah. I’ve got a weirdo chronic illness of the autonomic nervous system [aka: it can set off nearly everything random in the body] that already sends weirdo symptoms (since mid-twenties) which either 1. go away and don’t appear to come back, 2. go away and then come back and repeat, or 3. are just gonna be here once they’re here, and now I am a smidge over 40 and Not Appreciating the additional probable layer of perimenopause symptoms/weirdness on top of that.
On the minus side, it sounds like there aren’t really Perimenopause Treating Doctors available in the wild; on the plus side, as long as none of my doctors can figure out what something is or how to fix it, maybe it doesn’t matter if it’s perimenopause or autonomic nervous system or something else, as long as the “something else” also does not have treatment available? (something that drives me nuts about my medications, though: so many of them have “see a doctor immediately if you experience [symptoms I already daily experience]” and look, how the heck am I supposed to know whether to take any given weirdness to a doctor or not? Sometimes doctors tell me something’s common/normal; sometimes they tell me it literally can’t be happening; sometimes it’s semi-common but worrying; sometimes it’s rare but not worrying)
Anyway. Not A Fan, but greatly appreciating the increased availability of information and conversation and “this is weird can we make it stop?” that is now going on, and I will contribute my heat/cold advice: 1. rice socks (rice, in a sock, knotted at the top, warmed up in a microwave; or a stitched fabric bag with rice in it) for warming up cold extremities at any time, and 2. cold damp washcloths with a liiiitle bit of gentle moisturizer on them, applied to neck and inner elbows and wrists for generalized too-hot and to wherever is too hot for specific too-hot, and 3. a thing I have not tried, but: cooling summer dog beds, laid out beside you but not touching you, in bed, to roll onto when you are too hot; they’re thermoconductive, so they slurp the body heat up to a certain degree [and then they are the same temperature as you and are useless until they cool down again]; they’re enough to drink up some women’s hot flashes. Then once either they are no longer feeling cool or you are feeling cool enough, optionally roll off them again to let them “recharge” to room temperature for next hot flash. Gel pack ice packs at room temp are somewhat similar? (there are also bed cooling systems, both air-based and water-based, but they are 1. more expensive and 2. louder and 3. prone to breaking down. But worth it for some people!)
I hope someone figures out better things to do with perimenopause soon…
I will say that I have greatly increased my protein intake and that has had a WONDERFUL impact on my sleep.
Frozen shoulder! Yes! I had no idea. My main symptoms are regular/irregular periods (I get one, skip two months, get another 3 weeks later, repeat the cycle) and worsening insomnia. I’m naturally a person who has a hard time keeping weight on, and that has actually gotten WORSE, so this summer the plan is to up my weight training. I do NOT want osteoporosis.
I will look for this book!
Also 43, also told I’m too young despite dealing with so many of these symptoms. My psoriasis is in a seemingly never-ending flare, my hair is falling out in literal handfuls, I have developed a new poochy stomach so that suddenly none of my pants fit, and my cycle is completely wackadoodle, coming every other week. Sometimes normal, sometimes a blood bath, where I wonder how I am still walking around after losing so much blood. (I have had an ultrasound – it appears “normal”.) Also joint pain, especially my knees that never complained before, and dental woes. The teeth sensitivity has skyrocketed, I cried at my last cleaning it was so painful.
I would like to address this with Mother Nature because this system of hormonal deprivation, while still having to deal with Many Life Things (especially teenagers) seems flawed.
I have a friend who just started a small business making cloth pads! I haven’t tried them personally (my incontinence is still limited to using the trampoline without having just peed), but they might be what you’re looking for. https://figtreestudio.co/
At 64 it’s mostly in the rear-view mirror, and I had a pretty easy run compared to some commenters! One thing I have noticed that’s not even on the list but I think is down to the general loss of muscle tone is constipation. Trying to put it delicately here, but when the muscles are weaker the uhhh delivery is hampered.
Sadly am no longer able to enjoy a good sleep in. Once I’m awake, that’s it. Was also taken by surprise by thinning eyelashes and eyebrows. One positive is that losing these ‘feminine’ attributes is definitely accompanied by a significant increase in don’t-give-a-****ness.
I started having night sweats around 36/37. They did every test under the sun to rule out everything, I saw 5 doctors… and the end result was “well you’re probably too young, but it might be perimenopause”. I’m almost 45 now. The night sweats continue, existing issues on that list have mostly worsened, and some new ones have ben added (the crawling/tingling skin thing can eff right off), and there’s no sign that I’ll be hitting menopause any time soon, periods are still regular. I love this journey for us (sarcasm, obvs).
Oh wow, I had some of these, and it was tough. I stopped having periods at 49 (young yes) and fortunately haven’t had many issues since. I opted out of hormone treatment, so there is that. Hot flashes were horrendous (vitamin E helped), irregularity (surprise hello there), incontinence and UTI’s seemed to be the worst. My problem was I didn’t know if this was normal or if I was sick, or something was wrong with me. When to go the doctor with something, or see if it passes. I never really had a good doctor who understood perimenopause anyway, so no help there. I am glad I am on the other side of these things. Not having a period anymore is a wonderful thing (mine were heavy and very painful).
Oh and I started (at least I think) peri-menopause in my early 40’s.
Long time reader but I don’t often comment. I found out about 6 months ago that at the ripe old age of 43, I am *post* menopausal and I didn’t even know I went through it. Not for lack of symptoms though – all the symptoms I experienced and mentioned to my doc at previous appointments had been dismissed/ not even considered signs of menopause, neither had the topic even been broached. I was starting to notice some what felt like more hormone-related weirdness with my body and I thought I might be entering perimenopause so I asked my doc to check my hormone levels – surprise! Post menopause. When I expressed some concern at being ‘done’ so young, he informed me that I was ‘in the middle of the range’ for menopause (and yet none of my friends of similar age have even started having symptoms…). I still feel like it was too early. I had not had a period in well over 2 years, but again, it was dismissed. I had queried with my OBGYN as to why I wasn’t getting my period on the pill that I was on, and was told that sometimes (depending on the hormone combo) it is just so light that the body reabsorbs it, so I thought absolutely nothing about not getting it because I had been told it was nothing to worry about. Anyway….
Of the list that you posted, I eliminated things that I had issues with prior to going through menopause, but out of what is left, this is what I did, and in some instances still do experience:
* acid reflux – I did have this already, but it got much worse.
* anxiety – this has ramped up to ridiculous levels and I am still battling this on a daily basis.
* arthralgia (joint pain) – not so much during, but now, yes. Much, much more pronounced and longer recovery times after exercise.
* body composition changes / belly fat – yup, and much more difficult to shift / lose.
* brain fog – yup, plus issues concentrating / focusing
* breast tenderness/soreness – occasionally, yes. You can get issues with the ducts getting blocked and that can be uncomfortable.
* crawling skin sensations – YES! I frequently felt like I had ants or bugs crawling on my skin, particularly my legs. It is better now, but I still get it from time to time.
* decreased desire for sex – took a nose dive for sure
* depression – to the point that I went on medication for the first time in my life.
* difficulty concentrating
* fatigue – I would go through stages where it felt like I never even slept, even if I had for 13 hours straight
* hot flashes – the worst, felt like I was on fire from the inside out and the sweat would pour off me. I don’t get them as much now though.
* irritability – which also came with a greatly reduced tolerance for people’s BS in general.
* itchy skin
* mood changes – still have them unfortunately
* muscle aches – and like with the joints, taking more strain in exercise and longer to recover.
* night sweats – still get these but less frequently now
* pain with intercourse – yes, mostly due to dryness, which is also a symptom
* sleep disturbances
* tingling extremities
* weight gain
* wrinkles – I won’t say wrinkles just yet, BUT, I definitely noticed a change in my skin. It looks older – I don’t have a better way of describing it. I definitely needed a richer moisturizer and it tends to look duller.
One thing I can say – whether this is just my experience or not I don’t know – is that I *feel* older. It’s very hard to explain. Even though I am 43, I feel like I am 10 -15 years older than that physically. My husband has told me ‘it’s all in my head’ but honestly my joint, muscles and energy levels say otherwise. I exercise fairly regularly and I feel like I never fully recover before my next session. I have become far less tolerant of people’s nonsense, and I become irritated more quickly these days too. There are also so many other weird little things that go on with my body that I have given up keeping track. It’s kind of like just accepting that ok, we’re doing this now.
I cordially hate everything about this. Sorry. I’m 39, so I have so much to look forward to! /s BUT I can provide a positive anecdote- after Swistle mentioned fiber a while back, I’ve experimented with supplements. I think I eat a good amount of fiber in my diet but I also think the supplementation has decreased bloating and led to easier bms. I like Benefiber best (easy to mix with water), but Metamucil is supposed to be better for lowering cholesterol and high cholesterol runs in the family so I feel like I should take that instead. We’ll see what happens when these two canisters run out.
https://cupofjo.com/2024/06/21/perimenopause-comic/
I am not at this age yet, but I find it appropriate that two of my favorite blogs (practically my only blogs still updating!) covered the same topic the same week.
The one symptom I didn’t see listed, that I definitely got with perimenopause (and that went away almost entirely after) is LEG CRAMPS.
I had intense frequent hot flashes. Still have them sometimes. My periods were so irregular I tracked them on a spreadsheet (shortest was 16 days apart, longest was 249). The dryness everywhere came and stayed. (Though I’m now on Ozempic for T2 diabetes andsome fluids are back?)
Irritability, definitely. Slight incontinence, definitely.
RECOMMENDATIONS: Fanny Pants have wonderful cloth pads.
I wear dresses almost exclusively. I get them from Eshakti, and they do a great job of handling weight fluctuating and body redistribution. (I get the cotton jersey ones)
Amazon has a set of 12 foldable fans for like $10. https://a.co/d/05bqsDAN. I carry at least one with me everywhere. I have one next to my bed. I have one near the tv. I have one on my desk.
I HAVE BEEN HAVING LEG CRAMPS!! Often SURPRISING ones, like: I just move my leg to get out of bed, and CRAMP! Or, I tilt my leg to, like, cut my toenails, and CRAMP!!!
At 47 now I have been complaining of many of these issues for the last 4-5 years. At first I was told I was too young. But, I was put on hormonal birth control to regulate the suddenly impossible to predict and newly painful periods I was getting. Ever since then, whenever I mention anything on this list I am told either it can’t be perimenopause because I’m too young, or this can’t be due to perimenopause because the hormonal birth control suppresses your natural hormones. And so, I’ve been sent to neurologists and rheumatologists and dermatologists galore who can find no explanation nor help in any way.
What really bugs me is this dismissive attitude about it. Several of us just in this comment section have said that we have these symptoms despite being on hormonal birth control. Can we be the only ones?
Eventually my gynecologist figured I’m old enough that she can’t give me the you’re-too-young nonsense and just admitted that while it’s true a lot of what is bothering me could be attributable to perimenopause, the main culprit is a lack of estrogen and there is more estrogen in the birth control than in any hormone replacement option she can give me so there is really nothing she can do. Which, while disappointing and unsatisfying, is better than the dismissive you-don’t-know-what-you’re-talking-about attitude I always got before.
I’m 42 now and a year or so ago my migraines got much worse and more frequent so I went to my GP and spent some time finding a medication that worked to get those back under control (topiramate my beloved). About the same time I started having real trouble with anxiety and low mood, and also my never-great memory went completely terrible, and I wondered about perimenopause but thought, No, surely I’m too young? And also my periods have got heavier and more frequent if anything (sweet summer child that I was, I thought your periods gradually faded out). Anyway I had a look at the NHS menopause page and I talked to my mother (she started perimenopause in her early 40s, it turns out) and yep. Here I am. I talked to my GP about this all and she wasn’t really interested in talking about it since I’m under 45, which is apparently the official age the NHS allows you to be perimenopausal, but she grudgingly referred me to the menopause clinic and it took 7 months for my appointment to come through but I just had it and the doctor there was SO NICE. She agrees I am definitely in perimenopause and I have another appointment soon to start HRT which should help with my mood and the hot flushes that have now started as well, and includes a mirena to bring my periods back down to a non-Carrie level.
Other things from your list I’ve had problems with: joint pain especially in my hips, crawling skin feeling, itchy ears, needing to pee all the damn time, waking in the night, some other things I won’t mention. I’m also concerned about osteoporosis as my mother has that, HRT really helps reduce your risk there so that’s another reason I wanted to try it.
My mother also said she was done completely by 49 so that’s nice. Looking forward to that. My kids are teenagers so I’ve been ready to be over and done with this whole nonsense for years already.
Domino pads. I’ve been using my cloth pads for a while and thankfully they are still in business unlike my other favorite cloth pad company. https://meluna-usa.com/collections/domino-pads
Oh, I wish I’d seen this post when it first came out. I’m so glad the list mentions body odor. I’m not sure if I’m technically in perimenopause, but I started dealing with body odor in my early 40s, and it’s been horrible. I was showering twice a day and putting on deodorant twice a day, and it didn’t help – I just smelled like flower-covered body odor, and I was getting a rash under my arms. I switched to Lume deodorant (they only had the cream kind when I started, now they have others but I still use the cream), and it’s been so much better. I live in terror that it’s going to stop working for me.
Following breast cancer, I started an estrogen blocker at 45. Instant menopause. Estrogen zero menopause, in fact. I was worried about it. Not as worried as I was about getting cancer, of course, but enough to lump it in to the unpleasant things I was having to do after that diagnosis. And, by definition, HRT was not available. Here’s the thing, after a settling in period, two things have remained (1) I have gained 20 lbs and (2) I have no periods. I’m considering it a wash.