We had a slightly funny thing happen just now, which is that Paul and I were out on an errand, and we came back into the house in the middle of a conversation, and we started putting things away as we were talking, and it took us more time than you’d expect to realize that some of the teenagers in the kitchen where we were talking and putting things away WERE NOT OURS. I noticed first and said “Aaaa!” and then Paul looked up and noticed and said “Aaaa!” It’s not that we forgot how many children we had, it’s that we apparently forgot how many of them could conceivably be in our kitchen. Eventually my brain did the math (“Wait: COULD there be four teenagers in your kitchen right now??”), which is when I looked up and said “Aaaa!”
I bought a new mug, even though I seriously, honestly, truly need to buy NO MORE MUGS—and since that purchase, I have several times MADE MYSELF SAD by thinking “What if I hadn’t bought this mug?”
I bought it at…let’s see. It was either Marshalls or HomeGoods. I drove Henry and his friends to the theater to watch the Dungeons & Dragons movie, and the theater is too far from home for it to make sense to drive back home and come back later to pick them up, so I narrowed it down to three options: I could read my book and play on my phone in the car for two hours; or I could watch a movie by men about how some men at Nike got a sportsman to work with them on a shoe for men; or I could go shopping and see if I could spend the $14 movie ticket price on something more interesting. I bought a mug and a small lidded saucepan, which together came to two cents less than $14, and I had a nice time shopping, too.
I relearned, however, that I Do Not Like To Be Out After Dark. I do not like it! I think I am…scared of the dark? I realize that sounds silly, but I think that’s what it is. If I am out even just as the sun is starting to go down, I start to feel A Foreboding. If I am out doing errands in the dark, I have to literally talk myself through it: “This is fine! It’s just dark out! But this is the same normal familiar HomeGoods parking lot that gives you no Bad Feelings when it’s daytime! You are going to walk to your same normal familiar car and nothing bad is going to happen! And then you are going to drive to Marshalls and have some fun shopping THERE! It’s fine that it’s dark out! It makes no difference!” It’s mostly if I am BY MYSELF in the dark, but it’s ESPECIALLY if I am doing Normal Daytime Things (like going to stores I normally go to in the daytime) but it’s night. There is something very creepy to me about being in a familiar daytime store, and seeing the dark outside the windows.
That is a very cute mug.
I don’t like to drive after dark and I don’t like to leave my house like, ever (hyperbole but also not), but I don’t mind being out after dark. See the first bit, I don’t find myself away from home in the dark OFTEN. I did this week though and it was fine. And in 2 weeks I”ll be cycling myself to my friends house from the Jazz Fest Fairgrounds as it gets dark and it scares me about as much as daylight. Because I find people are jerks and terrible drivers with or without extra illumination.
I like frequent Swistle posts.
I also like your movie about men thing. And someone pointed out that that movie, and there’s another one I forget, is kinda bananas because it’s not the famous athlete (ahem, who is Black) but some white business executive who is the hero and, what? Also I’m from Boston and I used to like those two but they are, more and more, stereotypical, middle aged, white dudes and WHY DO YOU HAVE TO DO THAT WITH ALL YOUR MONEY AND FAME????? Why?????? I do not like them apples.
It’s also basically a movie making a heroic story about the pursuit of obscene amounts of money, which gives me the ick.
Having said all of that, it’s the first film from their new production company which is (supposedly, I’ve not read the details) exploring ways to pay all people involved in the film-making process more fairly and treat them better, which I guess can only be a good thing?
I think the pandemic made “leaving the house” let alone “leaving the house after dark” something foreign and that feeling lingers.
I don’t care for being out after dark either. Particularly in parking lots. It just seems like trouble waiting to happen (I KNOW that it’s probably fine 99% of the time, but still…)
Oh! And I’m really happy you bought that mug. It’s perfect.
That mug is beautiful! Of course you had to buy it. And such a good use of the money you saved by declining to see the Nike movie.
While I don’t recall having strong feelings about being out after dark, I definitely have strong — strongly negative — feelings about DRIVING in the dark. It feels as though I’m in a strange place that I’ve never visited before, and all the lights are too bright, and I feel unsure that I’m correctly judging how far away other cars are, and I’m anxious about deer and other nocturnal beasts leaping out in front of me.
I agree with everyone about driving in the dark, but I also, just in general, don’t like being out in the dark. Even when we’re camping! I mean, I love a good campfire, but I much prefer daylight. And in the winter, I also have to remind myself that it’s not late, it’s just dark. I think it’s gotten worse as I’ve gotten older, and it might be partly that my vision is worse, or the pandemic, or, you know, that the whole world is a giant mess and I am more anxious about everything.
I love that mug! Someone gave me a mug a few years ago that has bees on it and it’s much smaller than my usual mug and I don’t particularly have a thing for bees AND YET, it is my favorite mug for tea and I love it so much. Funny, the things that bring us joy.
I don’t like to drive after dark. I’m not particularly frightened or nervous, I just don’t see as well in the dark and I’m more afraid of having an accident . But I don’t want to end up as one of those older ladies who doesn’t leave the house after 5 pm unless someone else is driving, so I force myself to get out and drive anyway. I don’t have to like it, though.
I love that mug so much. And I also would freak out if I saw unexpected kids in my kitchen. But then, I have no kid at home anymore.
I get why you were taken aback with the unexpected people in your house. Despite the occassional annoyance, I enjoy the extra activity of having the kids’ friends in our house, especially the teenagers. Its so funny to hear the conversations and joking around that happens when you’re a fly on the wall going about your business at home. The only awkward thing comes at the end of the night when it’s time to get my daughter’s boyfriend to leave and I have to do prompting and reminding to go home (e.g., standing in my pajamas and saying, it’s time to wrap up now. are your parents coming to get you?). Teens don’t seem to take polite hints.
Just coming to the comments to tell you how hard I laughed at “I could watch a movie by men about how some men at Nike got a sportsman to work with them on a shoe for men.” I was wheezing.
Also I hate driving in the dark places that I’m not intimately familiar with and on freeways. Both make me incredibly tense.
I have heard, though, that Michael Jordan’s mom was the one that really made that shoe deal happen and that Viola Davis plays the shit out of that role so that might be a reason to see it:)
That’s interesting about the dark because I LOVE doing normal daytime things in the middle of the night. It feels thrilling and subversive.
Good call on the mug. You would have regretted NOT getting it, I am certain.
As someone who recently deeply regretted NOT getting a mug (recommended here on this site!) that I don’t need but instead putting it on my wish list only to discover that it was unavailable just a short while later and remained unavailable for weeks after that … I think you made the right choice in getting what is a truly adorable mug.
Also, possible happy ending, my mug became “currently unavailable, but order now and we’ll ship when it’s in stock,” so I ordered it, and though I realistically know it might never actually come, I like imagining it showing up unexpectedly at some future date. I try not to check obsessively to see if it’s shipped for just that reason.
My daughter is best friends with a girl two doors down from us, and while I long since gave up reminding her that she shouldn’t be inviting friends into our home without checking with me first, I have realized that my dreams of being an “open door policy, everyone is welcome” kind of parent who can accept all visitors with equanimity and grace have withered on the vine. There’s something disconcerting about coming in hot to give my kids an exasperated instruction/snappish order/prosy lecture only to have an extra child rise from the couch.
I agree with the comment about Viola Davis being the best think about the Nike movie. I don’t get the hype and all the good reviews. The story could have been well told in about 20 minutes. Good call on shopping :)