Nothing dramatic has happened since we last spoke, but I still have this feeling of not knowing where to START! I’ve had more social stuff crammed into this week than I’m used to, and it’s been great but also it is seriously cutting into my screen time.
I have seen friends, and wish to say again how WORTH IT it is if you can possibly manage it. I can’t take any credit for making it happen: it was someone else who formed the group, and chose the people, and kept arranging meetings until the habit was formed; I was fortunate to have been included. So if you can…Be Included in a Great Friend Group, I guess is what I seem to be suggesting to you, well then I heartily recommend it! We sat outside on a summer evening with our wine, and I peered a little tipsily at my friends who were so beautifully candlelit by the bug-deflecting torches, and I felt so LUCKY.
Also this week, our household went away for a few days to get together with extended family. For all previous trips, I have put out a mixing bowl of dry kibble and left the faucet dripping for the cats, and off we’ve gone, feeling lucky not to be dealing with dogs. But right now we have a cat with two daily medications who is in the middle of probably being diagnosed with lung cancer—and, most importantly of all, seems to only be able to eat wet food, which can’t be left out for days the way dry food can be. We’ve never boarded a cat before, and I was very stressed about the idea, and I wasn’t sure if we’d even be able to get a spot on such short notice; but I called the vet and they DID have an opening, and it all went well. The person in charge of the boarding program was everything you’d hope for in such a role, and she texted me photos of the cat with little messages that purported to be from the cat himself, giving me information such as “I peed and pooped and have eaten almost a whole can of food already!” and then little pawprint emojis. Everything you’d hope for.
Oh, and actually, something dramatic DID happen: at the extended-family gathering my mother lost consciousness while sitting in a chair, and we could not revive her; and we called 911 (specifically PAUL called 911, and did such a good job with it that I hope to delegate that task to him on all future occasions), and she is fine but it was a bit of a Startling Event. And it turns out they sometimes send firefighters to help the EMTs bring someone down stairs to an ambulance, and many firefighters are–oh what would be a good way to describe it?–“calendar-worthy.” Well! Some excitement all around. And in case you have a place to file such information: if someone faints / loses consciousness while seated (that is, they have not been in an accident or hit their heads, and there is no worry about broken neck/bones), 911 will tell you to lay them down on the floor if possible, to help get blood/oxygen to their brain. Perhaps you already knew this; I did not. Also: it turns out none of us really knew how to move an unconscious person from a chair to the floor. We managed it, but I was glad EMTs/firefighters were not watching us do it, and I am motivated to look for videos showing me how to do it right.
One of my favorite moments was when the EMTs had brought my mom back to consciousness and they were asking her some routine questions about medications and substances; and, after the EMTs asked if she’d been drinking plenty of fluids and she said yes, one of the firefighters (tattooed muscled arms in fitted firefighter t-shirt, shaved head) turned to me and said quietly “That true about the fluids?,” and let me tell you I IMMEDIATELY betrayed my mother (she is NOTORIOUS for leaving her water glass completely untouched at meals), and they hooked up an IV. Lie to the police if necessary, but tell THE WHOLE TRUTH to the EMTs. Even if they’re NOT cute, and crossing their tattooed arms, and looking down with warm eyes and a head tilted as if to invite confidences—as this one may or may not have been.
A good pet sitter is a delight!
One of the things I have learned through my mother’s aging process is that the elderly lose their sense of thirst, which is to say that all the eye-rolling I do about people bragging about how well-hydrated they are (meaningless!) and how everyone needs to drink 8 8oz. glasses of water a day (no they don’t!) is not appropriate for people over a certain age.
At a certain age, people need to remember to drink water, and — this happens with my mom — even if they’re normally good about having a few glasses of water throughout the day, a disruption to their schedules means they may forget and not notice anything amiss until they’re wobbly. And two big disruptions that have hit my mom are Traveling to See Family and Having the Family Visit. So I guess the good news is that although we can be a cause for dehydrated wobbliness, we can also be there to remind her to have some water.
Agree! My dad had a very bad episode also, which ended with an ambulance ride and a trip to the hospital (he’s fine), but the diagnosis after all that was “dehydrated.”
I suspect it’s a common problem, hence the extremely responsible and good at his job which is why we admire him EMT looking to Swistle for confirmation. He knows what’s what.
I’m so happy you had a chance to get together with friends and family! But also I’m happy for the post :)
I’m glad all are well and that your friend group seems to be being the very best friend group they can be.
But really, I’m here to thank you for that last bit. I love the description. I think I might love the EMT with barely any details and I don’t care. And I love you for sharing it. Good job betraying your mother when it’s important.
My grandmother used to do the no drinking thing. Because she hated needing to go to the bathroom, so she just wouldn’t drink water, and then she’d get headaches and sometimes pass out. It was useless to try to convince her otherwise that she was the cause of her own problems.
My apartment balcony caught fire many, many years ago in the middle of the night in February. I had enough time to grab my daughter and run outside and that was it. No phone, no glasses. Everyone was fine! But it was scary.
An extremely, painfully attractive fireman (young! big shoulders! the beard!) came over with a stuffed animal for my daughter and a blanket for me….and I realized I was not, in fact, wearing pants. I had on a baggy tshirt that said “Sleepysaurus” and that was it.
My kingdom for a “like button” in swistle’s comments!!
One of the lessons of adulting jokingly passed along to me by a friend was that she never lies about her weight in her driver’s license on the slim chance it would mess up medication/pain killer dosing by the EMTs. I have no idea if this is true, but it gave me pause!
I’m so glad to live in a state that doesn’t put weights on your drivers license.
Swistle, I am so glad your mom is okay! And that you got to enjoy some eye candy while she was being revived.
The cat boarding situation sounds perfect. I would love to get those messages.
swooning
“Lie to the police but tell the whole truth to the EMTs” is wisdom I will be imparting regularly to my children. Brilliant and nuanced.
I am glad the boarding went well. We had many many years of hiring pet sitters for our diabetic twice-daily-shots cat and we always enjoyed the person’s updates. I missed your precious post about the possible lung cancer. I’m so sorry—it’s a lot.
My mother passed unexpectedly at home, and when the 911 respondents arrived I remember thinking quite clearly about how absurd it was to be ogling firefighters at the literal worst moment of my life. I understand that firefighters are not all gorgeous, but anecdotal evidence is strong!
My son had a seizure in the master bathroom of our house when he was 5. For an incident involving a child, we had not just the EMTs but firefighters and police, all in my bedroom, which was very weird. But the main EMT who was checking out my son was so good looking (and good at his job), I basically was ogling and felt very weird about that as well!
I’m glad your mom is okay. And thanks for the bit about moving them to the floor, I had no idea.
I’m also happy to hear that you got to spend time with a good friend group and visit extended family.
I’m very sorry about the cat; I know that must be very painful for you.
Lie to the police but tell the whole truth to the EMTs is something that should be embroidered on pillows and screen printed on shirts
Many years ago I was at an event with many elderly ladies. One old dear passed out and slid to the floor, wig astray. We called 911 and they sent the loveliest (in ALL ways) firefighters. When they were chatting with the old lady, they asked her the usual questions to assess her alertness. When they asked her how old she was, she replied, “I am over 18 and that’s all you need to know.” We all died on the spot.
I’m glad your mom is okay, and I love that firefighter. They KNOW. Older people are strangely bad, as a group, at staying hydrated. That’s a generalization but one I have discovered from my years of working with them. My MIL was having kidney issues, and it turns out she drank 2 cups of coffee a day, and that was kind of it for liquids. Once she started drinking water it helped! BIG SURPRISE.
Also – love that cat boarder! The first time we boarded Barkley we got a “report card” about what he did all day, and I loved it.
My mom has had several incidents now where she woke up in the morning and it appeared that she had a stroke— unable to move her legs or her left arm, speech slurred, etc. Turns out that each time it was a TIA caused by dehydration! She’s fine, no lasting effects. None of them affected her cognition and she was very impatient with the questions about day, time, who the president was, and so forth. My dad had to tell her not to mess around with the EMTs as a joke, lol
All our EMTs are firefighters in our area. And yes, what IS IT with the attractiveness? They can’t all be that attractive, but maybe it’s the uniform?
I’m glad you’re mom’s okay. That must have been scary.
So glad your mom is okay!
We did not make it to the hospital with the birth of my second baby. I had insisted on taking a shower before we left, thinking we had plenty of time based on how obscenely long my first labor was, and how jaunty a mood I was still in when I got into the shower, but as soon as I stepped out of it, my water broke and things progressed rapidly. I made it to the bed but did not make it into clothes, my husband called the ambulance (AFTER calling my OB, who took one listen to me groaning in the background and told my husband to call 911, please), and then the kid popped out just after my husband’s phone died but before the paramedics arrived. Only it wasn’t paramedics at first, it was six firefighters, all crammed into my tiny bedroom while I was naked with a newborn on my chest. I THINK my husband had managed to cover me with a towel, but my memory is a little fuzzy. I know I never did get clothes, and that of the six firefighters and two paramedics, only one was female. And yes, even in such a chaotic situation, I was able to assess the calendar-worthiness of the whole crew. I blame the post-birth endorphins.
Also, it was really fun to get wheeled out by all those first responders and discover that the neighbors were having a garage sale, and the audience to our emergency was considerably bigger than it otherwise might have been.
omg, that sounds like a movie!! What a fantastic story :)
Omg this comment!!!!! An effing garage sale and firefighters at a birth!
Whew.
Glad your mom is ok swistle. You give me hope with the friend group!
My 17YO daughter passed out in a chair at her last vaccination; and 3 people swooped from nowhere and grabbed her chair and laid it back to the ground with her still on it; which had the dual effects of getting her head down and her legs up. I had not knowingly seen this manoeuvre before, but I hope to remember it if I come across anyone else who is unconscious but doesn’t have their head down
I found this post extremely entertaining.