This information this post is based on is several years old, more than several, but I was thinking about it today. When Edward was newly diagnosed with Crohn’s disease and was about to start on immune-system-suppressing medication, he had some bloodwork done, and also a TB test. I don’t remember why things happened in the order that they happened, but the upshot is that one of the things the bloodwork showed us was that Edward’s chicken pox vaccines had NOT been effective—but we found that out AFTER he was on the immunosuppressing medication, so it was too late to get the vaccinations redone. So he’s just not immune to chicken pox, despite being vaccinated on the recommended schedule.
I was AWARE, statistically-speaking, that a certain percentage of vaccinations don’t take. But somehow I didn’t expect MY PERSONAL CHILD to be affected. He had BOTH doses of the chicken pox vaccine, and right on schedule! How can they just…NOT HAVE WORKED? And why couldn’t it have been, say, Elizabeth, or Henry, or Rob, or William, who got the vaccinations and they didn’t work? Why EDWARD, who is now on immunosuppressants and CAN’T get any live vaccines and also now ABSOLUTELY CAN’T be exposed to chicken pox, on top of everything else he has to deal with? If Elizabeth (or Henry, or Rob, or William) got chicken pox, it would likely be similar to when I got it as a child: irritating and itchy and fully survivable. If EDWARD gets it, he has to go immediately for medical treatment, and he’s likely to end up hospitalized while it plays out, and that’s the HAPPY outcome.
Luckily for us, and for Edward, MOST kids in our area get the chicken pox vaccine, despite chicken pox not being a big deal for most people. So even though it would be very dangerous if he were exposed to a case of chicken pox, that’s not likely to happen. I don’t know the last time I even HEARD of anyone around here having chicken pox. I still worry about it, of course I worry about it—but what a treat, what a relief, that it’s not something I need to worry about MUCH. People who would probably not be in danger from chicken pox are nevertheless getting the chicken pox vaccine, so the population at large is less likely overall to have chicken pox, and so the population at large is less likely to expose Edward in particular to chicken pox.
It is not a good feeling, to go through life having something dearly treasured and so completely irreplaceable be so vulnerable to common dangers. My other kids will probably go to therapy later and complain that I loved Edward best because I was so fretful and protective, and I DON’T love Edward more than I love them, but I do worry about Edward more. He is no more treasured, and no more irreplaceable—but he is so additionally vulnerable to common danger.
I got the flu once when the twins were toddlers. The nurse who gave me the flu shot that year bragged about how quickly and painlessly she gave shots—and, as she pulled the needle out of my arm (so fast! so painless!), I saw the little arc of fluid, presumably my flu shot, vaccinating the air. I remember how sick and how exhausted I was. I would put the twins into their high chairs and then collapse into the recliner to close my eyes for 30 seconds. I would put some dry cereal onto their trays, and then weep a little while lying with my cheek on the cool kitchen floor. It went on for weeks. I was so tired. It lasted so long.
But I was in my thirties, and healthy and well-nourished, and not compromised in any way other than being the already-exhausted mother of toddler twins. I could be ill for awhile, and weep a little and collapse a little and lose a few pounds, and then recover.
Edward is not in that situation. He can’t just be ill and then rest and then recover. When he got a sinus infection, he ended up in the hospital twice, surgery twice, antibiotics for seven weeks. Things that are no big deal for other people are a big deal for him. This is true too of preemies, and of babies in general, and of elderly people, and of people already ill with something else, and of people whose flu shots didn’t work, and of lots of other people in lots of other circumstances.
I think of this every year when I get my flu shot. I have Edward to think of, but also my nephew, who is particularly susceptible to respiratory things, and my mother, who is also particularly susceptible to respiratory things. Of course I don’t want to get the flu again: I HATED having the flu! But it’s not about ME, because I can get the flu normally, and recover normally; it’s about Edward, and about my nephew, and my mother, and about making sure I don’t get the flu so I don’t pass it on to them. And in a broader sense, it’s so I don’t pass it on to any of the many, many other people I might not personally/individually care about in the same way, and yet of course I don’t want to hand an elderly woman a library book and have her die of my flu germs or whatever.
The trouble is that all of us are so IRREPLACEABLE. We can’t SPARE us. And so I would go so far as to say that all of us who are ABLE to do things to protect the more vulnerable among us have an actual ETHICAL DUTY to do so: a small thing for each of us to do, but something that collectively makes a HUGE difference in the protective barriers around others—like how I don’t have to worry so much about Edward getting exposed to chicken pox, the way I would have had to a generation ago. Even Paul, who hates needles and is the babiest of all babies about shots (“That STUNG so much more than LAST year!,” he complained TWICE when we got our flu shots today), gets his flu shot, to protect Edward and to protect our nephew and to protect everyone else’s Edwards/nephews/grandmothers/babies/irreplaceables.
Amen to every word of this. I got my flu shot a couple of weeks ago, exactly for this reason.
Please hold, I’m on the other line with my doctor, scheduling our shots!
I love this. I am getting my flu shot next week, my daughter got hers two weeks ago. We are the herd!
I got mine at work last week. They had Dum Dum suckers! Did you know butterscotch is a Dum Dum flavor? It’s delicious.
I got the flu in February and it was pretty terrible, but mostly a day in bed was the worst of it. I was terrified of giving it to my kids though. My poor daughter was so red when I picked her up from preschool in a mask! But they didn’t get it.
Ugh. She was so scared. Not red.
We get flu shots every year because my husband also takes immune system suppressing medication. I have had the flu twice in the past 3 years but have managed to not pass it to any other family members. I was sick with a fever for 5 days each time along with the runny nose, never ending cough, and aches and pains. I can’t imagine how long I would’ve been sick without the flu vaccine.
Our pediatrician used a shotblocker thing that helped the shots not be so bad for my kids, and I was pretty impressed.
I live in New Zealand where we currently have an awful measles outbreak. I’m typing from a chair in hospital holding my baby who is 10 weeks old and has been crying inconsolably all day with a slight temperature. If this is measles someone will have to hold me back from going postal on the next anti vaxxer I come across. How can people be so selfish
I’m so sorry your baby (and you) are scared and suffering! Hoping for you both that it’s not measles, and your sweet, irreplaceable baby is on the mend soon!
I was just about to sign my kids and myself up for the flu shot clinic at our neighbourhood pharmacy when I heard the news that our city? Province? All of freaking Canada?!?! Is low on the vaccine!! So now I don’t know if/when we can get our shots! I got the flu after being vaccinated last year and wouldn’t wish it on anyone and am happy to do my part to contribute to the herd! So good on all of you who do and have gotten vaccinated! I’ll join you as soon as I can!
Augh! I was about to go to the bottom to comment that hm, it’s odd, but now that you mention it I haven’t seen my local pharmacy offering the shot yet, and I normally get it as soon as I see the posters. So I googled and lo, you speak the truth: there’s a shortage delaying the regular vaccine in my province (and across Canada), and the nasal spray my kids get (and which is better for my son because there’s less of the egg protein in it to which he’s allergic) won’t be available at all this year! And my husband takes immunosuppressants, and my father in-law is about to get out of the hospital after 3 months and is considered high-risk, and my mother is on maintenance chemotherapy and… well, I would just like to get my damn flu shot already so I have one thing to worry less about. Sheesh!
Thank you! I got my flu shot the first day I could go to one of the free/onsite clinics my work offers and DH and DS are getting theirs soon.
I cannot be vaccinated against whooping cough (apparently had 1 shot as an infant, very bad reaction, been told never to go near that vaccine again, even though it has apparently been improved/made safer) and — yes. Please, fellow herd members, do the right thing.
So so so so true. I’ve gotten the flu twice in my life. Once, I was in college. I hadn’t had the vaccine and it was the most sick I have ever been in my life. If I didn’t have a kind roommate, I would have ended up in the hospital.
The second time I got it, I was pregnant. That time, I had gotten the flu shot. It was so mild, that I thought I might be coming down with a cold or something. I decided to get checked out, and NOPE, positive for flu. But even though I was pregnant, it was SO MILD. Because even though the vaccine wasn’t perfect, it had amped my immunity up so much, that I just was a little tired.
So yes. Flu. Every year.
That happened to me last year too! Was pregnant, got the flu shot and then the flu, which was mostly uncomfortable stuffiness and a cough. So glad to have missed out on the high fevers and aches.
This is so interesting. I live in the UK, where the NHS approach seems to be that vaccinations are great, important, essential even – until it comes to flu and chicken pox! Chicken pox isn’t included in the routine vaccination schedule and the NHS advice is not to get it done privately – something to do with shingles immunity? But I’m absolutely baffled by the logic of it, and simultaneously loathe to go against medical advice so we’ve held off on privately vaccinating our daughter so far. I’m so confused by the whole subject!
And flu I think is actually simpler – a flu shot is a great thing to have but only the needy are covered by the NHS. So my daughter gets it, I had it last year when pregnant and my husband’s company provides it. Which really means I should get my tushy in gear and go pay privately for it – as you say, it’s all about the herd mentality.
Argh no sleep! *loath* and *herd immunity*. 12 week old baby has sucked all my brain power from me.
Having recently moved to the UK from the US, I find the NHS’s explanation for not offering the chicken pox vaccine to be a bit insane. Their official rationale is that having children with chickenpox in the community acts as a sort of “booster shot” for adults against shingles. While in theory I suppose this is true, why expose children to the very real possibility of complications from chicken pox instead of simply offering the shingles vaccine to the elderly? I’m pregnant with my first child (who will be born in the UK), and I will absolutely be getting him/her vaccinated privately.
Yes it seems to be based on an assumption that chicken pox is a mild and harmless illness – but that’s obviously not always the case, particularly for those with impaired immune systems. What the NHS advice seems to have done is just really confused people! I’m a journalist, I’ve read a lot of medical studies and it still throws me. I think we need to get the vaccine for my daughter (and son when he’s big enough).
Weird. I have family in Europe who were advised (by their doctor) against getting their kids vaccinated against chicken pox; they didn’t, and the kids got chicken pox (fortunately, mild cases). I guess this explains (?) that?
I have read that being vaccinated against chicken pox also reduces the risk of getting shingles later in life (though as others note there is a vaccine against that, too). It seems very odd to me not to vaccinate.
I live in Scotland (am from US) and a couple years ago almost every kid in town got the chicken pox except my three kids who had been vaccinated in the US. I was talking to one of my friends here who is a nurse and she said that they have started doing shingles vaccines for people who are 70. Which is funny to me because I am pretty sure you can’t get shingles if you haven’t had chicken pox before. So if they would just immunise the kids then the rate of shingles would go way down (eventually). A lot of parents here that I talked to didn’t even know there is a vaccine available for chicken pox. I have always been under the assumption that the reason they don’t do that vaccine is because of money. The NHS doesn’t have money so they have to always decide what is the most important stuff to cover and they feel that for most people getting chicken pox isn’t a big deal.
Nice post, Swistle! As a severely immuno-compromised adult, I say BRAVO for spreading the word!
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU.
I cannot have a rational conversation about this topic because I become so enraged with peoples’ reasoning for not getting shots/vaccines* when you could LITERALLY BE KILLING OTHER PEOPLE by not doing it.
*Obviously this doesn’t apply to people who have a GOOD reason, like Edward!
All of this YES. We line up like ducklings and get our shots at the pharmacy. Just waiting for our early season sinus crap to resolve itself so we can go together without sounding like we ALREADY have the flu. My daughter was born during the H1N1 season/scare/whathaveyou and it was pretty humbling to be told her 4 year old brother could not come see us in the hospital post birth because of FLU scares. None of us had it but the hospital was taking no chances and banned most visitors. We have all gotten the shot every year since then.
I feel so fortunate—just so unspeakably lucky—to live in a time and place where I can vaccinate my beautiful irreplaceable children, and trust that most of my neighbors are doing the same so they can protect my immunocompromised husband, and Edward, and babies, and my friend doing chemo, and and and. Just so lucky. Billions and billions haven’t been as lucky.
Yes yes yes. We are fortunate that everyone is able to receive the flu vaccine, and 4/5 of us got it this week (I’m headed to the pharmacy today!) We’re going to be visiting my MIL in a nursing home in a couple of weeks; it would be irresponsible of us to cart in avoidable germs, to a population that can’t just bounce back. I hate that so much wrong information has clouded people’s thinking on this subject.
My siblings and I were children when the chicken pox vaccine wasn’t a thing, and while my sister and I got it when we were little, my brother didn’t catch it until he was a junior in high school. He’s otherwise healthy, and it took him two months to recover – it was terrible for him. You just don’t know how a “minor disease” can effect someone!
Just a note, with the caveat that I am not a doctor, but years ago my kids got the chicken pox from their sitter, who had shingles. My kids were born in 1988 and 1991, which, I believe, was before the chicken pox vaccine was available. Apparently, and again, not a doctor, but chicken pox and shingles are related; possibly caused by the same virus? And now there is also a shingles vaccine, so there is less occurrence of that as well. But another consideration for those with lowered immune systems, etc.
We all get our flu shots and the geriatric among us have also had the shingles shot. Hmm. “Shingles shot” sounds like a merry little drink. I wish.
Yes, chicken pox and shingles are caused by the same virus; if you’ve been infected with chicken pox, which most of us who grew up before the vaccine were, the virus goes dormant in your body and then can sometimes reactivate and cause shingles. You can infect someone with chicken pox if you have shingles and they do not have immunity, which is why the shingles vaccine is also very important.
AMEN to all of this. My dad was on immunosuppressant drugs from 1999 until he died in 2017 and every flu season I worried. We all got flu shots but you never know. If anyone had any kind of cold/fever/intestinal issue we stayed far away from my parents until it passed because for my dad those kinds of things could land him in the hospital in serious trouble. One of my coworkers never gets the flu shot (for no reason other than she doesn’t want to – they give them out free at my office and she is healthy) and is so proud of herself for never getting the flu or the shot and it just makes me so angry every year. Feeling mad about it all over again and it hasn’t even happened yet
Yes I had a co-worker (now retired) who never got a flu shot and was so proud of it! However, every year she would get a bad case of the flu (and even come to work sometimes like a martyr). I was so glad that I and my other co-workers were able to get a flu shot! Got to go get mine ASAP!
YES. My youngest was too young for the flu shot last year and I spent the entire flu season worried about it getting to my newborn. Luckily, we avoided that. So thankful he is old enough to be vaccinated now—my whole family went last week together to get our shots!
You know, as I booked for my shot your post from – last year? Two years ago? – came into my head and then here you are! My husband has a disease called sarcoidosis, which is currently in remission but something like the flu would not be great for him. I mean, it would be nowhere near, nowhere NEAR what Edward would have to go through, but all the same, we don’t want a relapse, which could be caused by stress or illness. I also work with a LOT of seniors, in fact out of 6 yoga classes I teach 5 of them are heavily senior-skewed. If I passed something along to one of my students, and they had complications as seniors often have, I could never forgive myself.
Bravo Swistle! Bravo to big man babies for getting it even when they don’t want to. Bravo to my husband’s employer for offering a flu shot clinic free for employees. Bravo to the university my husband attended, which conducted a “Flu Fest” in the fall with assembly line style shots. Bravo to our pediatrician’s office for having a walk in flu shot clinic (so we can get it without going through the damn patient portal). Bravo to Target for offering $5 gift cards when you get a flu shot with insurance (this was last year). Bravo to Costco for making it quick and easy this year. GET ER DONE.
I absolutely love this. I’m sure you posted it to Twitter, so I will go find it and re-tweet. It’s an important message that the masses need to see.
Thanks for sharing.
Two of my kids got their flu shots already, as they had well child checkups recently. My one son almost had a panic attack about getting it, but he got it done. I wanted to take my daughter last weekend, but then she came down with a cold so we couldn’t. (One year I got the flu shot whilst recovering from a cold and then my cough turned into bronchitis because my immune system had too much to fight.)
My husband works in a hospital so he has to get his and can get it at work. I need to get mine done this year.
My Mom in Law almost died from the flu a few years ago and she was healthy when she got it. The flu virus destroyed her pancreas and now she has Type I diabetes. It’s ironic because she didn’t get the flu shot because she would get woozily at needles and feel like she would pass out. Now she has to give herself shots of insulin daily and is fine with it and gets her yearly flu shot too.
I failed at getting the flu shot today. Apparently my insurance is garbage and doesn’t work to get the free flu shot at Walgreens or CVS. :( So now I had to make an appointment at my Dr’s office at a time where I can take myself and my high school daughter. They don’t have anything after school, so we have to wait over 2 weeks until she has a random day off school. Frustrating! Had I known this, I could have got mine last month when I was at the Drs with my sons a couple of times.
This needed to be said and you said it so well. I wish we could hang a copy of this post in every doctor’s office everywhere.
Joel got the flu two years ago when I was pregnant and I was so terrified and angry that some person who didn’t feel like getting their flu shot because they were ok with taking their chances with the flu was going to potentially kill my baby, or one of my other kids. Thankfully Joel recovered pretty quickly and none of the rest of us got it (we had all gotten shots). Get your flu shots, people.
Super timely! This happened yesterday on Twitter. https://mobile.twitter.com/hashtag/whyivaccinate?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw&src=hash
#whyivaccinate
Thanks for the reminder, Swistle!
I also got my chicken pox vaccine as a kid and found out at age 27 when I got bloodwork done for grad school that it hadn’t taken, so I had to get it again. The fact that it’s even a possibility that this can happen is worrisome.
Thanks for the reminder! I got my flu shot yesterday and my kids are getting shots tomorrow. I have a relative who is super anti-flu shot so it’s just nice to read all these comments :) She won’t be convinced that they’re safe. Sigh.
When I got pregnant with my first I found I was not immune to Rubella. After my first I had 2 MMR shots. Got pregnant with my second and …. not immune to Rubella. They offered me more MMR shots but at this point I just try to avoid spot-y children.