(image from Amazon.com)
The Storied Life of A.J. Fikry, by Gabrielle Zevin. I really liked it.
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Here is something that bothers me: when the paperback edition of a book looks different than the hardcover book. I wish they’d match. I linked to the hardcover above because the hardcover feels like the book I read; the paperback feels like a stranger. I suppose there must be assorted good reasons why they don’t match them.
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My hair has reached the length where I hate it unless it’s up—but I do really like it when it’s up. It feels/looks tidy and styled, and yet I don’t have to blow-dry it or maintain a haircut or anything, and it takes me less than 10 minutes from wet-hair-in-a-towel to totally done (4 minutes for a twist and plain side-bun, more like 10 for a French braid and braided side-bun). It feels casual enough to wear with jeans and a hoodie, but also works for dressy occasions. I like how it stays in place and out of my face. I like how it shows off earrings.
French braid with braided side-bun
But I really hate it when it’s down. It’s not particularly pretty; it doesn’t look luxurious or sexy, and Paul is not a long-hair-preferring type of guy. It makes me feel aging and frumpy, and I feel like it emphasizes my double chin. It gets in my way. If I don’t braid it at night, it gets pulled every time I roll over. I hate washing it. I hate folding it into the towel. I hate brushing it. I hate the long loose hairs all over the house.
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Paul was away for a long weekend, and it was weird. It’s strange how much temporary solo parenting differs from duo parenting. We’ve both found that while the job is harder, in the short term we feel more relaxed and happy. I think it’s because: (1) it’s emergency mode: it’s temporary and everything’s weird and it seems fully justified to get take-out food and not worry about housework; (2) resentment levels completely disappear: if I’m busy and Paul’s loafing around, I resent it; or if Paul’s busy and I’m loafing around, I feel guilty or wonder if he’s resenting it; but if I’m busy/loafing and Paul’s not HERE, nothing registers on that scale. Anyway, we had a nice time AND we were glad to have him back.
In my past life as someone who worked in marketing for a big publishing company, it’s often because publishers are trying to reach a bigger/different market with the trade paperback cover. Maybe the hardcover undersold expectations, or maybe they are trying to reach the book club market. What’s interesting is that covers are very different across geographic markets. So the US cover may be different than the Canadian cover which will certainly be different from the UK cover. The Harry Potter books are a great example of this.
Or even, as in HP, the “adult” covers may be different than the YA and/or middle grade covers!
I know what you mean about the long hair and the feeling frumpy and aging. I just shortened mine by about 6-8 inches, but before that it was waist-length and it was extremely high-maintenance. My problem is that I only like it when it’s down and I get headaches when I put it up, so it was everywhere. Everywhere. In all my business. With the little bit of length cut off and a few layers in the front I feel a lot better about things.
I’m amazed by your braiding abilities.
I think you just uncovered a scathing truth about my life: I never stop parenting in emergency mode. I separated from my kiddo’s dad five years ago, but everything you said rings true. Must think on this.
I keep a google map of books I’ve read each year with a photo of the cover, and always try to link to the one that I’ve been toting around. The audiobook is often the same design as the hardcover, I’ve found. (Wanna see? http://bit.ly/1IFRDBD)
OK, that is super cool. Random question: what do the different colored pins denote? Why are some location tags and some are pins?
Thanks! The idea wasn’t mine, but the colors and pins are my system. Red is non-fiction, yellow is fiction, green is YA (fiction by defaul). Location dots are books I physically read, pins are audiobooks. I try to drop the pin in the location setting of the story, but if I can’t figure it out, I use where the author is from. It’s really spurred me to read books set in other cultures/locations.
I’m having the same long hair problems. When it is down, I feel like I look like a witch. When it is up, I wonder if a ponytail or messy bun is appropriate for a 44 year old. Do I think it looks neat and tidy, but others see me as someone desperately clinging to youth? I do not know! Also, my hair is starting to gray at the temples (so sad) and has become drier than it’s ever been, so even a shorter style is frustrating. It is the one thing that is making me feel like I’m looking at a stranger in the mirror.
I think there is no such thing as a hairstyle that you like in all its iterations. The point I’ve come to is that I need a hairstyle I like somewhat, even when it’s not “done.” Like, it’s important to me to be able to look in the mirror immediately after getting up and not be horrified. My hair is about 2 inches below shoulder length, and super layered, so it does the job for me. The only time I don’t like it is when it’s pulled back from my face really tightly. I’m ok with almost every other configuration it does. I think that’s a reasonable threshold to determining the relative success of a hairdo.
The Storied Life of AJ Fikry was my go to book last year to hand to friends. I loved it. Will not cut my hair no matter how long and messy it gets (shoulder blades ish) and wish I had your talent with braids.
I used to work in publishing, and usually a paperback edition gets a different cover when it didn’t sell as well as hoped when first released in hardback. The idea is that maybe a redesign will help it along and attract a new audience. Often if a book became a bestseller as a hardback, they keep the cover the same. Like, for example, both Wild by Cheryl Strayed and The Goldfinch by Donna Tartt stayed the same in paperback. Both were bestsellers. But a movie tie-in edition would likely be different, for different reasons.
For anyone interested, I just finished the A.J. Fikry audiobook. I liked it too and the narrator was very good. He sounded just like I wanted the main character to sound: kind of precise and prickly, but lovable.
I’m totally impressed by your braiding skills! I am never happy with my hair. If it’s long, I want it to be short. Then as soon as I cut it, I remember that it’s too thick to be short and I spend months/years growing it out again. Lather, rinse, repeat. One good thing about getting older is that I don’t have to wash it as frequently, which is good because I am lazy and my hair is very wavy/frizzy (read: high maintenance). It’s starting to go gray at the crown, and I’m already panicking about what additional maintenance that will require. Stupid hair.
I have the opposite problem with my long hair: I think it only looks good when it’s down. But I can only stand to wear it down on the days I wash it. I’m not very good at braids and buns so wearing it up means a ponytail, and that also shows the grey at my temples more than when it’s down. I do wonder if long hair/a ponytail is really the best look at 45. On the other hand, my husband loves long hair and compliments me all the time, and I haven’t had to go to the hairdresser for more than a year.
I just had to cut off all my hair because I broke my left wrist and I’m left handed and all I could do was kind of point the blow dryer at my head, I couldn’t even put in a bobby pin so I just got it cut. But I wanted to say, your braids are beautiful, maybe just a hair cut where you can still do your braids but it’s not so long. I always feel better after a haircut, it feels like my hair is less fally-outy, etc.
Oh, hair. I’ve moved from a short bob, which was cute and longer in the front than the back, to a long bob, which is the same as the short bob except that my hair has grown, and the long bob might look cute with the hair shaped around my face and shorter in the front than the back but, in fact it is the opposite. Since it is, you know, just the short bob grown long. I want to get it trimmed, but I “want to” in the sense that I feel (probably correctly) that I would/will be happier once that is done, but don’t actually want to deal with doing it (one of those things I want to have gotten done, but not actually to deal with getting done). And thus does it persist. Of course if this goes on long enough (haha) it will not even be a bob, at all. On the bright side, it is almost long enough to pull back into a pony tail, so there’s that.
You braid beautifully and I am impressed by the speed of your hairdressing.
+1 on braiding ability and agility :) Don’t cut your hair Swistle! Just a couple inches like what Joann said above about taking off a few inches for healthy ends/lighter feel. IT’s very pretty and feminine without being overly styled. I see what you mean how it works for casual or special occasion.
@Alexicographer I have a short bob with longest layers that are chin length too. It is the only hairstyle I like on myself. I have zero hair ability and any time it’s long I resort to a “Founding Fathers” ponytail. I’m going very gray at my crown and have taken to wearing a headband (those stretchy ribbon things?) between root touch ups. My hair grows very fast, I trust the woman who does the cut and color on my hair and it’s my one high maintenance thing. Otherwise it’s DIY/Target H&BA aisle or bust!
My husband rarely is away, and when he is it’s usually two nights at the most, and I have the exact same reaction – I feel so much more relaxed because I’m prepared to Do It All and so I take shortcuts I otherwise wouldn’t. I also treat it more like an adventure and a challenge I must rise to. I even manage to put a preschooler who needs to be sung to sleep and a still nursing toddler to bed at the same time. I would never even consider doing this when my husband is home, and yet it works and is totally easier than I expect it will be, every time. Contrast this with the raging stress basket I become when my husband unexpectedly comes home an hour later than usual or is only home from his day job for 15 minutes instead of 45 on the days he teaches a night class and it seems really weird. Even weirder is how the anticipation of my husband coming home from a trip actually makes things start to fall apart again – as his arrival gets closer, I actually become less able to cope with his absence, rather than more excited (and hence more fun or relaxed) that he’s almost home.
I think your braid is gorgeous. I recently lopped off several inches and am back to something bob-like after growing it out almost to my shoulders, in part because I just couldn’t deal (even though the Wet Brush helped a lot). What clinched it was seeing a photo of myself with nicely shaped shorter hair and realizing how much better that looked. I do want the option of a ponytail, though, because otherwise it’s just in my face too much and vulnerable to brownie dough and other hazards.
I like your hair. It looks really pretty. Is it hard to braid it like that?
At this point, it’s not very hard. But it took a fair number of sub-par, frustrating, messy, give-up-for-now attempts before I finally got the knack of it. It was hard to learn because I couldn’t see what I was doing—so I had to keep doing it, then looking at it with two mirrors and saying, “Ah. I see. I need to pull it TIGHTER at that point,” or whatever, and then also the hand muscles had to learn it so I didn’t get all confused and lose track.
The best way for me was to think of it as “bohemian/casual” hair until I got used to doing it right! Like, “La la la, I’m just putting my hair charmingly every-which-way on purpose, la la la!” And I practiced a lot while watching TV.
Yes, when I know Husband is not going to be home, I settle in to the parenting thing without any expectation of someone doing some of it. I know it’s perverse but I prefer that far more over having Husband home and not helping, which makes me feel resentful and angry.
Haaaaair. Sigh. I have not cut mine in over a year, on the principle that it doesn’t matter if it looks good as long as I’m not TRYING and then FAILING to make it look good or anything. I apply this extremely terrible standard to many areas of my life.