Light Fixtures

My nice boss at Milk and Cookies gave us two $25 Amazon.com gift certificates to give away, so go on over there if you want a chance to win one.

I just chose lighting fixtures for the dining room. I’d thought that would be FUN, and I’d planned to buy something pretty/interesting. But I needed flush-mount fixtures because the ceiling is slanted and not high enough for danglies, and when I looked at a whole display room full of flush-mount fixtures, these were my choices (I yoinked these images from LightingUniverse.com):

Pardon me for inquiring, but is the buyer for the lighting store a MAN by any chance? Because every single one of these fixtures looks like a BREAST. It’s even more apparent when you’re standing under a ceiling full of them, looking up.

Furthermore, I needed…two.

I ended up with these, except with white thingies instead of metal:

At least they’re SMOOTH.

43 thoughts on “Light Fixtures

  1. Jen

    We have both versions in our house and I very much prefer the style you chose. It’s simple, sleek and kind of blends in. Good choice!

    Reply
  2. Jess

    Good choice! We have the breasty kind in our apartment, and we definitely will not be picking those once we live somewhere where we can choose our own light fixtures.g

    Reply
  3. Tuli

    All of my over-head light fixtures are attached to ceiling fans (no central air at Casa de Tuli).

    But if I’m ever in a position to install central air, you can be darned sure I will not replace my ceiling fans with breast lights. *shudder* & *giggle*

    Reply
  4. Lindsay

    Heheheh, I think the real name for them is melon lights, and we all know what melon is another name for.

    My mom renovated last year and got the same light you ended up picking out. I think it is a bit of a new standard, just like the boob lights were the old standard, and I just checked in my apt and yes we have boob lights!

    Reply
  5. Enniferjay

    We have the breast in the living room and it has fascinated every breast fed baby in our house. Never noticed it until they stared up at it trying to figure out how to latch on.

    Reply
  6. Misty

    As I was looking at all of those pictures, I was saying in my head, “Looks like a bunch of boobs.”

    So, I agree. And I like the smooth one you picked ;).

    Reply
  7. Jill

    Do you have something against boobs??
    We’re in the process of replacing some fixtures as well and seriously, they all look exactly the same, nipples and all! Also, can we hear more about your pending MIL visit, because I was just told that my FIL plans to come up for a MONTH and yet I am not being informed of the dates and there are only so many comments I can make before I piss of my husband by sounding rude. But seriously! A month! I so want to complain about this on my blog but Joe will read it and be annoyed.

    Reply
  8. Whimsy

    More boob lights over here, as well. We HATE them and have slowly been trying to replace them in the house. The whole time I was scrolling through the pictures, quietly whispering “Please don’t let Swistle choose the breasty lights, please.” So glad.

    Reply
  9. Lise

    Let’s check… Yep. We got the boob fixtures over here. Funny thing is, I never really thought of them that way before. Me, the woman breastfeeding her third baby. Have to say I still like them though!

    Reply
  10. Astarte

    You didn’t want a rack for your ceiling? Whyever not? Doesn’t everyone want to look at ceiling boobs? Well, at least you know your hubby probably did.

    Reply
  11. Jen

    YES! We were all jazzed to leave the tit light back at the old apartment only to find that the previous owners of our house installed their OWN tit light…ON A CHAIN. sheesh.

    i can’t wait to replace it with a titless ceiling fan. :)

    Reply
  12. Tonya

    Don’t I know it! We have a boob light over our bed, very erotic as you might imagine.
    And not only do they look like boobs, but is it just me or do ceiling lights totally lack imagination? So boring.

    Reply
  13. Pann

    Yep. They sure do look like boobs. I never noticed before, but as soon as I looked at each of the photos you put up, that was the first thing I thought of!

    Reply
  14. Bea

    I KNOW!!! I was thinking the exact same thing as we were picking out our lights (but of course I never saw the potential for blog-fun in it). We have the exact light you picked in all the bedrooms in our house (but with the clasps shown, not the white ones). I think we ended up with one boob-light in the back hall, because it was the only one that would coordinate with the kitchen chandelier.

    Reply
  15. Sheena

    Whew. We just moved into a house with those ‘breasty’ light fixtures in every. single. room.
    I am sooo glad I’m not the only one who thinks they look like breasts! However, the thought of you having two of those side by side over your dinner table is a bit amusing…

    Reply
  16. Tara

    OMG, you are so right. I hate the boob lights in our house–virtually every light that’s not on a ceiling fan or in a bathroom is a boob light, and I hate them. Really, who designs those things? (duh. . . MEN)

    Reply
  17. Cherish

    haha I was totally thinking they all looked like boobs while I was checking them out. I have dandly ones in my house and I love them, but I think I would have picked the same ones you did.

    Reply
  18. Omaha Mama

    Well, I have the bottom choice of the boob lights. Boobs. Seriously. I had never thought of that until now and will from now on. So thanks for that. Also, what do have against nipples?!

    Reply
  19. mpotter

    i have soooooo thought the same thing! i often wondered why they couldn’t put the screw-thing somewhere else, lest they intend to be obviously breasts!

    glad you found some that weren’t as womanly.

    Reply
  20. brenna

    “…every single one of these fixtures looks like a BREAST.”

    That line cracked me up, because as I was scrolling through those pictures, the thought I had was “I prefer my lights to be nipple-free, thankyouverymuch.”

    Good choice on the one you picked.

    Reply
  21. Suzannah

    Good choice…as I was scrolling down, I was thinking, “Is she asking for opinions? Should I tell her they all look boobalicious? Not if she’s already picked one…” but thank goodness you found a more (less?) tasteful (har!) option.

    Reply

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