This has been the kind of day where I am just one tiny step away from squeezing upper arms. It seemed like every time I turned my back to help one child, the other two children got into mischief.
Edward cried loudly, like he’d been stabbed, and so I went rushing to help him—only to find that he had dropped his crayon (as well as, it seems, knocking over a large pile of books and paperwork) and couldn’t reach it. While I got Edward’s crayon, Henry tipped over the cat water. He was lying in the middle of this puddle. Cat water grosses me out, so I gave Henry a bath. He splashed me a lot, and he cried when I took him out because he wanted to stay in.
While I was giving Henry a bath, Elizabeth stomped in the cat water puddle. Edward stepped on my notebook and did the twist, so that it got all mangled. I cleaned up the cat water puddle, and Henry continued to cry angrily in his restraints high chair. Then he started sucking on his fingers, and he gagged himself and cried some more. Meanwhile, Edward colored on a permission slip I needed to fill out and get back to the school. And Elizabeth kept talking! talking! talking! talking! to me, until I asked her to please go play, and she stood there with her lip out, sulking. Like this, but a month later and in the kitchen (the photo is from April and the hallway):
When she felt better, she started telling herself the story, “Mommy say, ‘Be why-it!’ Because we being too yowd. And den I tomp in the cat water. And make big mess!”
I started making sandwiches. The twins started clamoring for taste! taste! taste! and jostling each other on the stepstool. Henry was still fussing. I thought he’d stop when I gave him his sandwich, but he didn’t. He ate, but he kept up with the fussing as well. He is a multi-tasker; this challenge is no problem for him. Steam…pressure…rising!
But now, finally, it is naptime—although I hear Henry talking to himself and that’s a bad sign, and Elizabeth WILL NOT STOP TALKING TO ME. Oh, I’m sure (*makes sarcastic flappy-mouth gesture with hand*): later when I’m begging her to talk to her old mother I’ll be wishing I’d spent more time listening to her precious voice. But right now, OMG! Mommy’s ears are FULL! Mommy would like to have THIRTY SECONDS in which she is not tending to some sort of situation that is messy and/or loud! Mommy would like to stop referring to herself as “Mommy” because that is weird and annoying!
Anyway. Here we go into the long weekend. And am I looking forward to it, as if it will be a time of rest and relaxation and fun, rather than a time that will make me long for my usual weekday routine? You betcha!
Oh, you poor thing. Seriously, is there something you can eat, or drink, to help you get through the afternoon? Because it made ME a little crazy just to read that, and I’m not living it!
Oh, my, you do need a break. And a stiff drink.
wow, that sounded like a scene from a movie!
And here I was begging you to come read my post. Now I feel all guilty!
But MAN how cute was Elizabeth talking about what happened? SO. CUTE.
Awww Mommy! I hope you got to sit down for a few minutes during nap time.
Oh and loved the post on the new glass bottle. So many of my mommy friends appreciated it!
Maybe the long weekend could involve one margarita for one over sensitized mother??
I hope you get a break this weekend.
Yaaawwwnnn…I need to go take a nap after READING that. Seriously…have you seen the IKEA commercial with the two kids hollering and bickering while the Mom is trying to work and suddenly she stomps into where the kids are and goes “ALRIGHT! SOMEBODY needs a TIME OUT!” and then SHE goes into her own room and shuts the door? Wouldn’t that be nice to do? I want to do that pretty often; I can’t imagine how much you must want to do it at times like this!
You know, Cat Water is kind of gross! I don’t blame you for immediately disinfecting Henry.
I hope you can carve out a little bit of time this weekend to do something nice for yourself. Whether it’s a nice long nap or some quality time with a good book you deserve it! I like to unwind by injecting horse tranq directly into my eyeball.
First, you describe that so well that I feel like my own skin is itching.
Second, Henry eats SANDWICHES? Oh, my girl is so nowhere NEAR a sandwich. I can’t wait for that.
if you lived in my town, i would drop off my all-purpose baby entertainer at your house and drive you to a bar or a bakery, your choice.
(hope the weekend is restful!)
I know.
THIS has been my whole WEEK.
Cheers to a quiet weekend. We can hope, can’t we?
SInce I teach elementary kids and I hear stories ALL!DAY!LONG! my kids know that sometimes, when I get home that my ears are TIRED and they can’t handle any more talking for at least 5 minutes.
I totally feel your pain !
I’m sitting here in a seminar reading this post on my phone. I just started cracking up and got a few looks. You are my hero seriously.
Sounds like you need some quality time with a pan of brownies lol.
PS her bottom lip kills me!
Here’s wishing you some peach and why-it, where nothing is yowd.
Jen (Daily Dose Jen)- Maybe we could take our bakery items TO the bar.
Hmm… And I was just starting to mull around the idea that, “Maybe it’s not too soon to think about another one!” Way to put on the brakes for me!
The New Girl- He has NINE teeth, including a MOLAR! Also, he has four older siblings, and he wants what THEY’RE having.
Amen. I hear you. I feel your pain. I live your life. sigh.
There are days when the twins are screeching for something and Drew is yammering at me and I just want to plug my ears and go “blah blah blah” and hope they get a clue. And then mix in the oldest who wants MY.ATTENTION.RIGHT.NOW. It’s enough to make even a slightly sane person bonkers.
And I still have no bakedy goods in the house.
Here’s to a bit of rest this weekend, for us both.
“Mommy’s ears are FULL!”
Thank you for giving me the perfect phrase for when the kids keep talkingtalkingtalkingtalking. That is so much shorter than “Mommy needs you to be quiet right now so that she can concentrate on making your lunches while nursing your sister and answering the phone.”
oh my. i just spent 30 mins bitching to my coworkers about one of the lawyers i have to work with, but now i’m happy she doesnt’ TALK a lot, at least.
It’s at this point I start frantically seartching for the Ativan. Like it’s CANDY. We’re on “vacation” now in the home state visiting parents. Four hours on a plane with two under two (Sweet lord above!) and ten days sleeping in random rooms with random family members and the girls in pack ‘n plays. Which THEY ARE LOVING. So much in fact that they’re up every 2 hours at night to let us know how grateful they are to be in this situation. As are we. Fun fun fun.
I my goodness. I think I need a drink after reading that post. Is is five yet?
Geez, I couldn’t get away from the talking, talking, talking today either. But I only have one kid to make me nuts. phew. You need a night out!
Oh goodness. Summer vacation is right around the corner, though. Aren’t Rob and William good at keeping the twins occupied?
“But right now, OMG! Mommy’s ears are FULL!”
I relate to that so well!
Have a great weekend and find a little corner of time in which to indulge in some quietness. Maybe Paul should switch bodies with you like in the movie “Freaky Friday” so he can truly get a feel for this.
I think I need a bubble bath followed by a batch of brownies after just READING that. You most certainly deserve a bubble bath and brownies followed by a large cocktail of your choosing. Or several!
Because it is cool when your eyeball twitches like that.
Is it the full moon? A change in air pressure? The thrill of school being out? Because my kids have been chatty kathys all day. I finally turned on them after dinner and said “For the love of God, can Mommy please have 5 minutes ALONE?” Zoloft. I need to up my dosage. Enjoy your weekend!
That picture of Elizabeth is so very cute!!
Why do we talk about ourselves as “Mommy” all the time to the kids? It’s off, isn’t it? I do it too, but then I catch myself and think WTH. It’s strange.
Holy crap, what a day.
I meant to say last time you posted that pic that Elizabeth’s adorable hangdog expression is made even more funny by the fact that she has an actual dog on her top. The bottom lip is THE BEST.
(Btw, re sandwich talk: My twin girls [just turned one year old] do sandwiches and they only have six and seven teeth. I cut them into small squares. I would give them bigger triangles or rectangles but they would likely take one bite then THROW THEM ON THE FLOOR like they do with most food these days. Believing that they are “experimenting with gravity” makes this only slightly less irritating. Does Henry do this?)
These are reasons why being a working parent is SO MUCH EASIER than being at home. I swear, work can feel like a spa vacation.
I was wondering what Elizabeth was talking to you about. The re-telling of the story was a great example!
Wish I lived closer, and could lend a hand!
Hello! I’ve been reading for a while, but this is the first time I have commented. I just had to tell you…your little girl sounds EXACTLY like my oldest. She talked to me from morning until night. And everyone kept telling me to enjoy it, because someday she would stop, and you know what? She’s sixteen. And she is STILL talking to me every possible moment, and we homeschool so she is here ALL DAY. Bless her heart…I love her dearly. But my ears…they are very tired.
That wasn’t a very comforting first comment, was it?
Okay, I had to comment AGAIN because I had to look at this post again to see THAT PICTURE. Of the LIP.
Maybe it’s because she isn’t mine? But that little face with that lip sticking out like that? Makes me want to DIE OF CUTENESS.
When I was a child my mother used to say, “I’ve changed my name” whenever we’d call for her. I didn’t get it until I had my kids. I always thought it was just a weird thing my mom said.
Umm, yes. Sounds very rough. I think you need some “alone time” with your boyfriend Target.
Also, a video of Elizabeth chattering away would be AWESOME.
And a sandwich! For Henry! I’ve actually been hoping you’d do a post on what he’s eating, what you feed him, because you are the source of great knowledge. My own has decided he is TOO BIG for baby food and now won’t eat anything unless he can pick it up and stick it in his own mouth.
Sam- HENRY TOO! He’s all, “Spoon-fed food is SO yesterday.” I’m giving him toast, scrambled eggs (he’s a tidge early for egg white, but I went ahead anyway, with caution), sandwiches, fruit, raisins, dry cereal, dried apricots/plums, broccoli, chick peas, graham and goldfish crackers. Anything big, I cut into fruit-cocktail-sized pieces.
I’m late for something and still stopped by to skim catch-up real quick and now I have to comment because what you said about squeezing upper arms just made me laugh! I get that feeling too, accompanied by fierce clenching of my teeth/jaws.
Oh, and now I want brownies, but I’ve got to go to church first! Now I’m going to be sitting there, completely distracted from the lessons, thinking about warm, soft chocolaty goodness. Yummmm!
OMG, I looove it when kids narrate their own pissed-off-edness to themselves out loud! Elizabeth is TOO FUNNY!!! AND she talked about how she herself stomped in the cat water to get back at you!!!! HA! Oh, there’s a girl after my own heart!