Shannon is suggesting we pool our recipes for chocolate-chip cookies, and I’m all for that idea: I’m going through my cookie stash even faster than I’m going through my muffin stash. Go on over and sign up so I can steal your secret family recipe.
This is my fourth time through postpartum, and Paul and I are getting better and better at handling it. What helps most of all is this kind of thing (also, observe my mad Photoshop skillz):
Paul is worth all the food scraps he crams down our non-garbage-disposal-equipped sink when he does stuff like this for me. While I’m the hospital he goes to the grocery store and buys all the foods I want after I have a baby (theme: “things they fed me in the maternity ward where I was ha-a-a-a-a-a-ppyyyyyyyy *bursting into tears*”): cranberry juice, milk, deli turkey and fancy chunky grainy breads, colored wraps and Romaine lettuce and tomatoes and chicken breast and Caesar dressing. Then, whenever he’s home, he handles my meals. The above photo is of what I found when I was exhausted and sad at the end of the day and had just peeled an endlessly-nursing baby off of me for what felt like the first time in a week. I went to my computer and there was a chicken Caesar wrap, a glass of milk, and a vase of roses. I shouldn’t even be telling you about this, because in the future when I want to complain about Paul you’ll all be like, “Yeah, whatever, you spoiled bitch.”
Food is the absolute best thing for my morale (well, good food and good narc0tics), but I’ve also found that small accomplishments are helpful. I’m not saying I wear myself out cleaning the house from tip to toe, because AS IF, and also I think it’s more helpful to let that go as much as possible. But if the kitchen counters are making me feel sad and overwhelmed and hopeless because they are covered in dried milk puddles and little blue marks from someone’s clay and speckles from boiling fudge, and I manage to wipe them down, I feel like maybe I have a grip on life after all. Also: pretty, sparkly counters.
So this is what I do. I am good at keeping a mental list, but you could do this on paper too—as long as the list itself won’t overwhelm you by its very existence. What I do is I put small items on the list in order of priority, choosing each day which one I really want to try to get to. Today it was the counters: I didn’t care if I got nothing else done all day, but I did want to get to the counters. Yesterday it was a couple of bills I wanted to pay. The two days before, it was that I wanted to get some digital photos cropped and uploaded so I could order prints for my in-laws.
If I don’t get the task done that day, it’s no big deal—I just try again the next day. But if I DO get it done, I feel pretty good. I feel like I’m managing to get things done after all, and like maybe I’m coping okay after all. Sometimes, if I got the top list item done, I might even think of tackling the SECOND list item! Superwoman!
I am most likely to be successful if I do my list item early in the day. Today I did the counters while I was still in my pajamas. I got breakfast for Rob and William, and I went into the kitchen intending to make Rob’s lunch, and instead I spritzed all the counters. I let the spritz sit while I got Edward dressed. When I came back, I went swipe-swipe-swish with a couple of paper towels and I was done. I didn’t lift up the toaster and clean under it, I just did the minimum—but it’s surprising how much of a difference it made, and I felt all perky and pleased with myself. Highly recommended, if you can keep yourself from launching one of those cleaning cycles where now you have to scrub the sink, and that reminds you to fill the soap dispenser, and that reminds you to do the one in the bathroom too, and that causes you to spritz the bathroom sink “while you’re at it,” and so on until you’ve totally overdone it and also Rob has missed the bus.
Very sweet to find your treat at the computer!
It is nice when overwhelmed to complete just ONE thing. It makes a dent in the to do list. Any dent in a to do list is a good thing.
This isnt always a small thing,but I feel like as long as my kitchen is clean, I can handle anything.
The baby is just divine. I look forward to new pictures. The screaming on ethe other day made me laugh out loud.
I’m impressed you are getting dressed. Yesterday I spent all day in my pj’s.
I totally agree with the “make a list and get one thing done”.
Today I’m going to take a shower (I am not gross…it is just not a priority between endless nursing and “throwing a fit because mama will not give toddler a bottle of milk because she is almost three” toddler fits).
I have to buy envelopes today, too. So maybe a trip to Costco or Target where I will inevitably spend too much money.
plus I need to get some chocolate chips.
Why do my comments always turn into entire blog posts?
oh I love when they think of us without us having to say anything!
I’m great at making to-do lists. Then not so great at DOING the list. Then I go on a spree, totally independent of the list, and then I always go back to the list like some kind of obsessive compulsive loser and check off the things I happened to do. Usually though I’ve gone off on a completely different tangent. T knows I did stuff today because while it may not be overall cleaner, the mess has moved to different piles.
How sweet of your husband. I found a rose beside the bed the other night. I guess sometimes these men can be sweet. I’m not going to get used to it though.
I like the list thing (mental or physical). I agree that one accomplished task can make the day seem so much better. I’m sure with 5 kids that is multiplied by 5 for you too. ;) Or you know, sometimes the cleaning cycle happens too. I tend to do that, but if I can’t then at least *something* got done.
Wow-it amazes me that you have the mental energy to think about having clean counters when you have five children running around–okay, I bet Henry isn’t exactly running yet, but you know what I mean. But I like your idea about getting small things crossed off the list. And GO PAUL!
Oh, your husband’s treat made me tear up a little. Food is the most important thing after you’ve had a baby, I agree.
Yeah, you are spoiled. :P
I love lists!! I can’t think straight if I don’t write it down.
I love your postpartum tips. The sandwich looks great and you seem to be keeping your head on very straight! I am impressed!
I went to Target today to scope out end-cap clearance items and thought of you. I hope you’re getting to the other side of that postpartum funk.
you are like the super hero of mommy blogging! how on earth are you able to blog and take photos with five kids? you are my hero,..i struggle to do this with one!
Mmm, chicken caesar wrap… This is one of my all-time favorites at the restaurant my husband’s family owns. I think I had people fetch me food from there every day I was in the hospital so I wouldn’t have to eat the cafeteria junk! I’m glad you’re still getting the yummy food. Sometimes knowing you’re going to be eating something besides mac and cheese or chicken nuggets can be the lifeline that keeps you from randomly bursting into tears. Not that I know this from experience…
Also: Good work, Paul, on redeeming yourself after the “All I want to do is SLEEP!” incident!
This “do one thing” theory just might save my sanity. At least what little sanity I’ve got left. Little C let me do two loads of laundry today. Of course, I’ve yet to get it hung up, since the drying racks are in her room and she’s been napping for the last two hours (Bliss)
Henry is adorable and I love your blog, so count me among your regular readers.
DiWritr