Paul and I are having a little disagreement, and I’m hoping to add people to my side.
I have heard that if you want to have a tubal ligation at the same time as your c-section, OBs usually have a cut-off date for making that decision. That is, they are not going to allow a 39-weeks-pregnant woman to come hobbling in all swelled up and miserable and say, “Tie those tubes! I’m never having another baby!”
When I heard this, it made perfect sense to me. Many a woman has decided late in pregnancy (or in my case, in the barfing early part of pregnancy) that she never wants to go through this again. Then the baby is here, and the swelling recedes, and time goes by, and a baby starts to seem like a great idea again.
Furthermore, I think I have heard of this “decision cut-off” many times, and from many sources. Unfortunately for my argument with Paul, I could only think of one specific friend who had claimed to have this situation with her OB, and I’m fuzzy on the details because it has been a long time since she told me about it, and she and I aren’t friends anymore so I can’t call her and ask her. Paul seems to think that every time I hear a fact, I should write down the time, date, and people involved, and then get the document notarized.
You would think that Paul would not care if I claimed incorrectly that some OBs had a certain week before which you had to say you wanted a tubal ligation during your c-section. But he cares very much, it appears, very much indeed. He immediately started plugging terms into search engines, and then saying confidently that he could not find one single reference to any such thing. He demanded, as I’ve mentioned, to hear my sources–ideally with telephone numbers so that he could interview them himself.
It threatened to turn into a fight, except that I had just eaten a large bowl of chocolate ice cream with crushed oreos, and I was feeling mellow, and also I am far too large to storm out of the room, and so I wasn’t rising to his challenges, and so eventually he rolled his eyes and went back to playing a computer game, on which he vented his crabbiness instead of doing it at me, to which I say good deal.
I then did a little more searching myself, but all I found were references to a 30-day waiting period in general–that is, unrelated to pregnancy, just that many states and health plans require non-pregnant women to wait 30 days after making the decision before having a tubal ligation.
So here is what I need from you. Ideally, I need first-hand stories about you and about your personal OB, and about your personal OB telling you that he or she would need to know before Week X if you wanted a tubal ligation at the same time as your c-section or else he/she wouldn’t do it. If you are without personal stories, secondhand stories are also good. In fact, I’ll even take, “I heard one time that some girl…” stories.
Also, in case any of you were wondering what Paul was wondering, this is not something I’m even remotely considering for myself. It was that I wanted to use the cut-off date as an example in an email, and then I got disproportionately interested in the subject when I couldn’t quickly find the information I was looking for. Then I made the mistake of mentioning my search difficulties to Paul, and here we are.
Sorry I’m of no help; I’ve never heard of such a thing. I never brought it up and my OB asked me if I wanted one at my 38 week appointment and then again while I was on the operating table immediately following my second c-section. I said “no” both times but I can certainly see how some OB’s might have the policy of having a “cut-off” date. I’ll be interested to see what others say on this issue.
never heard of it either, but it seems logical to me.
I don’t know anything about a cut off date, but I have heard it’s not a good idea to have it done right after childbirth because your body is in such a mega healing mode that you’ve got a higher chance of things growing back together.
I’ve also heard that some doctors won’t do it if you’re under a certain age. My friend actually changed doctors because she KNEW she wanted to have a tubal after her second and she was only 24 and he wouldn’t do it. Said she might change her mind later, and what if something happened and she got remarried and her new husband wanted kids? (Not his business, I thought, but there you have it.)
Does that help at all?
My doctor said I would have to wait 6 weeks after the birth of my last child to have a tubal.
BUT two people in my family just had babies and BOTH had a tubal just days after birth.
I am thinking it depends on the doctor/hospital or something.
Oops the comment above by Billy is actually me, Jodi from Organized Chaos.
Must remember to log my husband out in the future. LOL
I’ve never heard of it, sorry :)
Good God woman! I thought I was the queen of super long run on sentences but you just totally kicked my butt! LOL! I love it.
But, sorry. I am no help to you. My response to your question is for HIM to get cut. :)
Uh, yeah, mine too! A woman makes plenty of physical contributions to the process of building a family, what with morning sickness, heartburn, fatigue, stretch marks, general exhaustion for nine months, labor or surgical delivery, and then all the post partum crap, plus breastfeeding for however long! I think a few days of discomfort is, frankly, the least the husband can do!
Uh, yeah, mine too! A woman makes plenty of physical contributions to the process of building a family, what with morning sickness, heartburn, fatigue, stretch marks, general exhaustion for nine months, labor or surgical delivery, and then all the post partum crap, plus breastfeeding for however long! I think a few days of discomfort is, frankly, the least the husband can do!
Wait, why are you considering this? Didn’t you mention you would like an even half dozen or so kids? That would imply you would want to be pregnant at least one more time. Is this about Paul’s insistence on no more kids, when, in fact, you want more kids? In which case relying on the 30-day technicality is really just covering up a larger issue, which is, ONE more kid or NOT?
Um, Penny? She’s not. As she herself wrote:
Also, in case any of you were wondering what Paul was wondering, this is not something I’m even remotely considering for myself. It was that I wanted to use the cut-off date as an example in an email, and then I got disproportionately interested in the subject when I couldn’t quickly find the information I was looking for. Then I made the mistake of mentioning my search difficulties to Paul, and here we are.
I don’t know about a cutoff time, but they won’t do it if you ask them while they are prepping you for a c-section. I know that one for sure!
I used to work as an OB nurse…
There is no legal time frame to request a tubal, other than if you are on a federal/state insurance program. Then there are papers that have to be signed six weeks before it’s done in order for the insurance company to pay for it (and you also have to be at least 21).
If you have private insurance, I don’t believe that there are papers that you have to sign, but in general all of the doctors that I know would discuss the option early on in the pregnancy, and confirm before it was completed. There is a special consent to be signed, so I guess if you signed that before it was done, then even if you hadn’t asked for it before that they would do it (given that you were having a c/section of course).
There are also some religiously affiliated hospitals (those that are catholic) which don’t do tubal ligations, even if requested by the patient.
Never heard of a cut off date. I did here of a friend’s OB ask while ON THE TABLE if “since she was in there…”, so clearly, no cut off date in her mind!
Definitely it would be the sensible thing for me to have a tubal ligation while they’re in there doing the c-section anyway: it’s way way less expensive and intrusive that way, just for starters. But permanent birth control makes me nervous and unhappy. And since I DO want another baby, and Paul DOESN’T, I think if anyone gets anything done, it should be HIM. (I don’t want him to do it either, though.)
I suspect that the answer here is that different health plans and different OBs have different ideas about this, and that there’s no one answer. Our insurance, which is regular insurance not a state-funded plan, requires a 30-day waiting period–but might waive it in the case of saving themselves a few thousand bucks (it’s way cheaper for them if I have it done during the c-section rather than in a separate procedure). And some OBs might not care about whether the woman might change her mind later, while other OBs might feel nervous about it. I should just ASK my OB, huh? But it seems weird to ask him just out of curiosity, when it’s not something I want done.
Sorry. Never heard of it, either.
I like the word vasectomy. It has a nice ring to it. My body has been through enough, thanks. :)
Hey!! Congrats on the new baby!! :)
I know it’s probably too late, but this was one of the confessions on truemomconfessions.com today and it reminded me of your post:
05.30.07 11:54a
My husband did all the cooking, cleaning, laundry in the couple of weeks following my combo c-section, tubal & hernia surgery. It was great, but bittersweet because I knew it was gonna end. And it did. and he doesn’t see why I’d be upset at the fact that he doesn’t do ANYTHING again. He’s proven he CAN.
You’re right but I can’t give exact dates, times, people involved, etc. I just know that several times while I was pregnant it was mentioned to me that there was a cutoff date before I had to decide if I wanted any sort of tubal ligation procedure done. If you want hard and fast evidence I can call my OB and get the exact info, and then provide it to you…
If your house is anything like mine, you only need ONE piece of evidence to be able to gloat about it.
Sorry, I’m 8 months pregnant and my OB has not mentioned anything about a cut-off date.
So…just a few years late chiming in here, but thought I’d let you know that I originally had a consult for permanent birth control after serious complications resulted from my 2nd delivery. After much thought & prayer I opted to try for one more baby and THEN be done. Now I am preggo with number 3 and the doc who did my previous consult is now my regular OB. I am currently debating between having the tubal ligation during my cesarean (this one will be scheduled after having 2 unscheduled c-sections) or waiting and having Essure done after the delivery & 6 week healing process. My doc has said that I have up until “the week before the cesarean” to sign the papers of consent, but he didn’t say why and since I intend to make up my mind well before then, I didn’t ask. For what it’s worth, he has also said that even though I have signed the consent papers, I pretty much have up until the moment he makes the first cut in my tubes to change my mind. Specifically, he has said, “even if you change your mind on the table, that’s fine. We just need those papers signed one week before the section.” Anyway, that’s my story in a nutshell.
-K
Comments are closed because of a persistent spammer. If you’d like to make a comment, email me and I’ll open comments for you to post it.